Prologue


The Shogun of the Dark examined the diagram for the seventh time. The
design took up nearly half of the cave and was so intricate that it would
not have seemed possible for anything human to create something so
elaborate. Even the greatest artists in the world would have been hard
pressed to replicate the design. 

It was a good thing the Shogun had had five thousand years to practice it.

He had used his magic to magnify his vision so he could examine every line,
making certain it was perfect. There were absolutely no second chances. The
supply of blood of all the various creatures, which made up the pattern,
was too low to remake the design, and if there was even one flaw and the
spell was miscast he would have to redo the entire design. No. There was
only one chance to get the first stage of the spell correct. That was why
it had taken him weeks to create the pattern, and why he had taken another
week to check over every inch of it seven times. It was perfect. 

Despite the lack of mistakes the Shogun still felt nervous. When was the
last time that had happened? One hundred years ago? One thousand? Ever? His
feelings were irrelevant. Too long had he awaited for this moment to allow
anything to interfere with the plan. It was time to begin the incantation,
lest something happen and interfere with the spell, costing him everything.


He magically floated to his place in the center of the symbol and allowed
the slow build-up of energy. Once initiated he could not leave the design
until the time of the sacrifice. Any disruption in the flow of magical
power from him and the spell would fail. That was the other reason he
needed the Eight Devils of Kimone, as well as Herb and his army. The Shogun
would be vulnerable now as his magic-laden body was drained of its precious
energy and he was forced to remain immobile. All it would take was one
person in the wrong place at the wrong time and five thousand years of
planning would be ruined. 

But Herb's army was in place, keeping out all who sought to intrude upon
the mountain, and the Devils could take care of anything else. Had he any
ego left the Shogun would have despised his limitations. For the last one
hundred years he had had to conserve his considerable magical energy, not
that anyone that stood against him would have realized it. He was still
powerful by most magi's standards. Given full power he could have unleashed
enough force to blast a hole to the center of the earth. If he had had
access to his full powers, Saffron would have fallen in an instant. 

But the Shogun could not use them; the power to fuel the spell was too
great. Virtually all of his magic was needed, and by the end he would have
just barely enough to sustain him. Of course, by the end he would have no
more need of magic. Everything would be taken care of without the need of
his present abilities.

The Shogun had understood all of that from the beginning, which was why he
had carefully plotted out everything so he would have just enough power at
the end to complete the spell. Even the effort necessary for the
resurrection of the Devils, and their subsequent enhancements, was
carefully calculated and preparations for them had begun as many as three
hundred years ago. And there were no other major displays of magic
necessary. All had been accounted for save the boost to Herb, and that took
very little power in any case. Yes. Everything was going according to plan.


So far.

The energy build-up reached its peak. He allowed one last thought of how
the world currently was to freeze in his mind. Though no one else knew it,
it was all going to change. 

He unleashed the power, sending an invisible beam of energy from his body
and through the very rock of the mountain, leaving it unaffected, and to
the skies above. High overhead clouds darkened as weather patterns around
Mount Phoenix changed. The wind intensified and lightning left white
streaks across the gray sky. Slowly the effect spread outward from its
source, causing villagers miles away to begin preparations for the coming
tempest. 

Other differences in the area began to subtly occur, though only a handful
of the most sensitive were aware of the changes. The weather was simply the
first thing to be noticeably effected. It had begun at long last, and no
one, save the Shogun of the Dark, truly understood what had happened.

Nothing was the same anymore.



Ranma 1/2 Present:
Shampoo 1/2
Chapter 34

Those Who Would Dare Dream of Tomorrow
Part I


All C+C greatly appreciated
You can contact me at sommer@nb.net

Azatlan has given Shampoo 1/2 a home at:
http://www.geocities.com/~azatlan/Special-Series/shampoo.html

Bloodblade has also given it a home at:
http://www.geocities.com/tokyo/towers/5920

Standard Disclaimer:
I disclaim I own any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to the
Goddess Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.
The concept of stand-users comes from Jo-Jo's Bizarre Adventure.

An Alternate Universe:

What's gone on before (or what you really need to enjoy this fic, the
condensed version) In the beginning the Saotomes traveled to Jusenkyou not
realizing Shampoo and Mousse already a duel going on. One accidental
mid-air collision and bath in Spring of Young Drowned Man later, there is a
male Shampoo as well as a female Ranma. (So Ranma-chan= female Ranma.
Shampoo-kun= male Shampoo. Enjoy) Shampoo elected to travel to Japan with
Ranma. After many months many friends and enemies were made. In the last
chapter Ranma was going to be married to Akane, but Shampoo at last
confessed her feelings to Ranma. As he was processing that revelation Tarou
attacked and Ranma fought him while Akane fought Shampoo. Both Ranma and
Shampoo were victorious, but Perfume had her Hunt Pack from Joketsuzoku had
at last arrived in Japan and have cornered an injured Shampoo. Their orders
are to bring Shampoo back at any cost...


<> This means Chinese.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


Shampoo gazed hopelessly at the hunt pack before her. All of the members
were easily recognizable. It seemed Perfume had gathered together a group
of some of the most talented of her generation, and virtually all of them
had some sort of dislike against Shampoo. There would be no indecisiveness
on the part of the Amazons; they would be eager to obey Perfume's orders if
it meant a chance to get their hands on her. Of all of those set against
her perhaps the most distressing thing, to Shampoo, was the presence of her
great grandmother. Had she not several weeks ago claimed she would assist
Shampoo in obtaining a cure? Now she was alongside a group of warriors
whose sole purpose was to take Shampoo back to China. 

To death.

"<I said it is time to come home, Xian-Pu,>" Perfume repeated.

Shampoo observed Perfume more closely. Was that a look of pain on her face?
It was difficult to be certain. What she could tell was that the other
girls were following Perfume's lead, just like good Amazons would. That
would mean Perfume was the leader of the party. It appeared Shampoo's old
friend had finally gotten her chance to lead after all. How...disappointing
that she would revert back to type after what Shampoo thought was a
sincere, heartfelt discussion the last time they had spoken. The talk had
meant a great deal to Shampoo, and she had treasured the much needed
healing that had happened between them.

"I have no desire to return home," Shampoo said in Japanese, allowing Ranma
to understand. "I am staying in Japan for now."

Cologne spoke up. "It is by order of the council, Shampoo. They believe you
have been gone too long and need to return home. There can be no choice in
the matter. You should obey."

Shampoo listened to the words carefully. There had been no mention of the
curse. If the council was aware of the problem her great grandmother would
surely have said something. And then there was the wording. 'Should,' not
must. Was her great grandmother encouraging her to flee?

"Shampoo ain't going anywhere," Ranma stated boldly as he placed himself
between the hunt pack and Shampoo.

A murmur went through the pack. Obviously Shampoo now had a protector, and
the members of the hunt pack evaluated him. Soap stepped forward. "Is you
Shampoo airen?"

It took Ranma a moment to remember what the word meant. "No way! We're kind
of just friends, at least for now. Geez, what kinda question is that to
ask?"

"Since you no airen then this no concern you, Japanese boy. Leave!" Soap
commanded.

Perfume was displeased by the disruption from the break in ranks. A scowl
was leveled at Soap, causing her to look mollified as she moved back to her
proper position in the ranks. 

With her authority once again asserted, Perfume took charge of the
situation. "You must come back with us. If you don't come along willingly,
we have orders to take you by force." 

Despite the air of command Perfume's voice carried, Shampoo was now certain
of the reluctance in her eye. Her former friend was not present by choice.
Curiously, Shampoo felt relief at that. No matter what happened, the words
of caring the two had previously exchanged in their last meeting had not
been false. At least there was that.

Shampoo moved in front of Ranma, now placing herself between him and the
pack before he attempted to do something predictably foolish. "There are
reasons why I must remain in Japan. I refuse." She felt uneasy at the
number of smiles that appeared among the group of Amazons. It was going to
be a fight. Softly she looked at the boy beside her. "Ranma, I don't
suppose if I asked you to leave to go get help you would."

Ranma gave a tired sigh. "No more than you would if I asked you. I am
asking you to do that, by the way."

Shampoo couldn't help but smile, despite the seriousness of the situation.
They both knew what the other one would do. If by some miracle they were to
get out of the situation alive it would be a good foundation for a
relationship. "No. I think I'll stay."

Perfume gave a signal for the hunt pack to form a circle around the duo.
They lacked the numbers to make the ring totally inescapable should the
pair try to flee, but there were enough to slow them down and give the rest
of the hunt pack a chance to fall in on them. Only Cabinet was the
exception, drifting off to the side, making certain she was near one of the
unknown elements the others seemed to have forgotten.

Ranma and Shampoo went back to back as the group circled them.

"Ranma," Shampoo said quietly as she eyed the circle warily. "You have to
promise me one thing."

"Depends on what it is," he answered.

She found it difficult to voice what she wanted. It was too likely to
happen, knowing Ranma. "Promise me you won't try fighting to the death.
Please."

"I promise," he said.

Shampoo was surprised at how readily he agreed. "You gave in pretty quick."

"Yep. I did," he concurred. "That's cause I'm not dying and neither are
you. See, these girls don't know who they're dealing with. If they did
they'd run back home to China. They're dealing with Ranma Saotome, and I
always come out on top."

Under different circumstances Shampoo would have cuffed him in the head for
that kind of egotistical statement, but in spite of the situation she felt
her confidence raise a little. Only Ranma could make so bold a declaration
about a person that had suffered the beating he had, then have a fight
against impossible odds, and still believe he could achieve victory. Not
that they really stood a chance.

"Besides," he added. "I still have an important decision to make. We can't
be dying until that little problem gets taken care of."

Shampoo looked over her shoulder and smiled softly at him. "You're right.
We'll have to make it out of this."

Perfume decided she had given them enough time to say their good-byes.  Now
there was one last gift she could give her one-time best friend. "Remember
to take her alive!" Perfume ordered. "Leave the male to me! He's mine!"

Perfume rushed forward and brought her naginta toward Ranma, driving him
away from Shampoo. As Perfume came close she said as loudly as she dared,
"<I won't let your male be damaged badly. I promise you that.>" She lunged
again at Ranma, forcing him further away. 

"<Thank you,>" Shampoo smiled. At least Ranma would definitely survive. If
nothing else Perfume would keep her word. Further thoughts were cut off as
the injured Shampoo was confronted by Foam and Soap. That was a surprise.
They had despised one another for years. When had they reunited?

"<Our target is injured,>" Foam commented to her companion as she brought
her fists up before her. 

"<Too bad,>" Soap agreed. "<I was so looking forward to seeing how long a
warrior of her caliber would last against us.>"

Shampoo remembered how well they had fought against her great grandmother
several years ago. Together they were even better than RanRan and LinLin.
Even if she was not suffering from her fight with Akane, she probably would
have been hard pressed to defeat the combination. Those thoughts were
immediately put to the test as the pair began their attacks. It took
everything Shampoo had to simply evade the first series of blows directed
at her.

Off to the side, Ranma saw the trouble Shampoo was in as he found himself
being forced further away by Perfume's thrusts. Had he been in peak
condition he probably could have taken the girl. At the very least he would
have been able to remain close to Shampoo and assist her, but as it stood
it took everything he had to avoid being impaled by his opponent. 

"I thought you were Shampoo's friend!" Ranma accused. "How can you do this
to her?!" 

The words cut Perfume deeper than any blade. "I am her friend," she
answered quietly, hoping the others would not hear. "I told no one of her
condition. You have no idea what I risked in trying to give her enough time
to get away from here. I was certain she would have fled by now."

"Well she didn't," Ranma retorted as he avoided another swing. "Now what
are you going to do?"

"I have to take her back home."

"That's the same as a death sentence and you know it!" Ranma snapped. "Why
don't you just kill her here and save yourself the hassle, or do you want
to put her on display so everyone can see just how skilled 'Perfume the
Great' is?"

"I do not!" she shot back.

"Oh, then you're afraid of getting your hands dirty?" He finally found a
spot to counterattack in. 

Perfume blocked the slow strike and hit Ranma in the head with the butt of
her naginta, keeping her temper in check. Goading an opponent into getting
sloppy was a tactic she often employed, and Ranma was displaying more than
a passing talent in it. Too bad she couldn't get any pointers from him.
"You know after my first encounter with Shampoo, here in Japan, that that's
not the case. It's a matter of law. It's a matter of honor. You're Japanese,
surely you understand that."

"If it's about someone close to me getting killed because of some stupid
accident that ain't even her fault, and it doesn't affect anyone else, then
I don't understand it. She can't shame her people over here. Just let her
go."

Perfume shook her head in a momentary opening. "If there were a way, don't
you think Elder Cologne would have invoked it by now? Shampoo must come
back with us no matter what."

"Over my dead body!" Ranma threatened as he tried to attack once more. She
deftly avoided the blows. Ranma began moving slower as the fight continued.

"It won't come to that. That is a promise I can and will uphold." She
struck out with a foot that caught Ranma in the head. There was no chance
to recover as Perfume continued to press her assault.


Shampoo at last made a mistake in her dodging and went high when she should
have gone low. Foam connected with a steel-toed boot in the stomach while
Soap struck Shampoo in the head with a metal-encased fist. A cry of
"NOOOOO!!!" prevented the duo from capitalizing on their advantage as a
series of chains snared them. 

Mousse could no longer remain out of the fight. No matter how painful it
was to finally accept that Shampoo did not love him, he could not allow her
to be harmed.

"<TRAITOR!!!>" 

Mousse did not have time to react as a war hammer slammed into his back,
right between his shoulder blades. The impact drove him into the ground and
forced him to release his grip on the chains. Pain overwhelmed his senses,
leaving him unable to stand up for several moments.

"<I knew you couldn't be trusted!>" Cabinet spat out as she raised her
weapon high above her head, aiming for Mousse's skull. "<I knew you'd never
let us take Shampoo by force. Now prepared to be punished for your
treachery!>"

As she was about to bring her weapon down, a ribbon snaked out from behind
her and wrapped itself around the middle of the haft. The tug that followed
forced Cabinet off-balance, leaving her unable to finish the attack, but
wasn't strong enough to rip the weapon from her grasp. Cabinet recovered
enough to scowl at Kodachi. "That big mistake, Rose Girl."

Kodachi laughed. "<Since you cannot speak my tongue, you backwater
primitive, I shall demean myself by using your own language. Allow me to
assure you that I would never allow a harridan such as yourself to lay one
finger on my Mousse.>"

Cabinet untangled the ribbon from her weapon. "<Fine. I'll lay my hammer on
you!>" Cabinet charged forward and attacked. Kodachi dodged the blow while
keeping one eye on her beloved Mousse. She was delighted when he started to
rise. The injury wasn't as bad as she had feared.

Her delight was short lived as Tablet finally took a step to resolve the
fight and hurled a spear at Kodachi. The gymnast was forced to dodge it,
but the evasion cost her as she was struck in the stomach by Cabinet's
meaty fist. The Amazon connected once again in Kodachi's mid-section,
winding the lithe girl and forcing her to the ground. A kick found its mark
in Kodachi's stomach, leaving her immobile as she gasped for breath, flat
on her back and clutching her abdomen in pain. Cabinet raised her war
hammer high overhead so the Black Rose could suffer Mousse's intended fate.


Moments before, in the center of the Amazon circle, Shampoo backed off from
the chain entangled pair that had been attacking her moments before. As
much as she hated to admit it, Mousse had saved the day. It turned out to
be a momentary reprieve as one of the Amazons threw a single chain around
Shampoo's left arm. A second Amazon that was opposite from the first
wrapped another chain around Shampoo's right leg.

"<Perfume ordered us to take her alive,>" the first one said.

"<But there was no mention about all the body parts being there.>" The
other one pointed out. "<Why don't we make a wish?>" 

Both girls jerked back on their chains. With one of her legs being pulled,
and while in her weakened state, Shampoo couldn't brace herself as she felt
her limbs being pulled from their sockets.

Mousse recovered enough to see the double dilemma. He had to choose which
one to help first and pray that he had enough time to help the other. But
whom to choose? There was no choice. He knew which one it had to be.

"I'm sorry, Kodi-chan." He turned to Shampoo and brought out a chain,
nearly passing out. He was still in bad shape from the hard blow to his
back. High overhead he spun the chain and aimed at one of the Amazons
holding the chains around Shampoo. Just as he was about to release he found
himself pivoting and threw his weapon to the right, wrapping it around
Cabinet's war hammer.

Cabinet felt a tug on her weapon once more, preventing her from unleashing
her blow. "What?! Again?!" she growled irritably. 

Mousse was even more shocked than Cabinet. He was certain he intended to
save Shampoo. Why had his body betrayed him and sought out Kodachi's
attacker instead? His confusion lasted only a moment longer as an arm
clotheslined him around the neck, driving him to the ground and forced him
to release his weapon once more. He was finding himself on the ground all
too often of late.

Julep gave a feral grin as she admired her handiwork. "<You're pretty slow.
I thought you'd be at least a little challenge.>"

He got up and tried to strike her with the Blow of the White Swan, but she
easily wove out of the way. Counterattacking, she brought a fist into his
face, then backed off several feet.

"<That's more like it.>" Julep smiled ever wider as she drew out her 'cat's
claws'.

Mousse brought out a set of his own, assessing her speed as at least
rivaling that of Mint, if not faster. He was going to be in for a fight.


Kodachi took advantage of Cabinet's distraction and used her attack of a
thousands clubs, pelting the Amazon fully with the barrage. Cabinet gave
ground under the assault, but remained upright. 

"<You're a good fighter,>" Cabinet remarked as the barrage finally halted
and she caught her breath. "<Too bad we can't be friends.>" As the last
word left her mouth Cabinet swung her hammer at Kodachi, who had recovered
enough to evade the blow.


"<One more tug ought to do it,>" the girl holding Shampoo's leg bantered to
her comrade. She tensed her muscles for one more powerful pull, tugged
back...then went flying backwards several feet, for the chain had been
broken. Her opposite number did the same thing, ending up on her backside
as well. 

The pair got to their feet  in time to see Ukyou with several mini-spatulas
in hand, adding to the two she had just thrown to sever the chains binding
Shampoo. She was flanked by Ryouga and a baton-wielding Ai.

"I told you I heard the sounds of a fight," Ukyou said.

"I never doubted you for a moment," Ai assured her.

Ryouga looked over his opponents. "Looks like we arrived just in time. They
look like Amazons."

The girl that had been holding the chain to Shampoo's leg got up and drew a
sword. "<Now you find out what it means to humiliate Lin Fhall, outsider.>"

Ukyou switched to her battle spatula and parried the sword thrust. Ai found
herself similarly engaged by the other Amazon that had pulling on Shampoo's
arm.

Ryouga watched his comrades being attacked but hesitated to strike out
against the Amazons. Fighting girls wasn't right. He finally worked up
enough nerve to try to attacking the Amazon engaged with Ukyou, but before
he could act, he was confronted by the now untangled Soap, who struck out
with a steel-shod right fist. Ryouga caught the fist, and then the second,
but could do nothing as Foam leaped over her partner's head and lashed out
with her steel-toed boots, nailing Ryouga with kicks right below the neck
and between the eyes. Ryouga was forced to let go of Soap's hands as he was
driven backwards.

Instincts took over as he blocked a kick to his mid-section, then two more
directed at his head. He was in the process of blocking a third one and
getting ready to retaliate when Soap struck him in the back of the head
with her metal fist. He swung a backfist of his own at Soap's head, which
she easily ducked. Foam took advantage of the distraction by connecting
with a kick to Ryouga's thigh. 

He once again turned his attention towards the kicker. Now Foam left
herself wide open as she drew back for a power kick. Ryouga could see it
was a foolhardy move; he was easily going to be able to strike first. His
punch went towards Foam's chest, but before it could connect the blow was
blocked as Soap moved her arms in front of the fist, catching it along the
metal forearm of her vambraces. Foam used the block to full advantage,
striking out with the power kick to Ryouga's upper body, sending him flying
more than ten feet away. The two Amazons moved in for the finish.

"<You were right,>" Soap said to her partner. "<He is a good test of our
abilities.>"

Foam nodded in agreement and continued to attack.

Ukyou had rendered her opponent nearly senseless when she saw Ryouga's
predicament. She was about to run over to the fighters when a long length
of cloth wrapped itself around her arms, binding them together and forcing
her to drop her spatula. Ukyou turned to look at her attacker. 

"<Don't worry, everyone!>" Sash shouted out heroically. "<I've come to save
the day!>" She sent a longer piece around Ukyou's legs, binding them and
dropping her to the ground. "<That'll keep you out of trouble,>" Sash
proudly announced.

Ai noticed Ukyou had fallen and panicked as she thought of what the blonde
might do to the prone girl. Her attempt to save Ukyou failed as another
Amazon joined in attacking her. Ai could not withstand the double onslaught
while trying to make her way to Ukyou, and suffered a multitude of blows
over her entire body. 

As Ai nailed one of her attackers in the head with her baton the other
Amazon drew back a sword and prepared to run her through. As she drove her
weapon forward, a pom-pom attached itself to her face. Trying to pull it
off with one hand didn't work, so the Amazon discarded her sword and tried
to remove the offending object. It still could not be removed. Further
attempts at eliminating it were halted as the blinded girl was kicked in
the stomach and the back of the head.

"You can't kill my captain," the newly arrived Kyoko said. "We have another
competition in three weeks."

"Thanks," Ai hurled her remaining opponent several feet away and was about
to say something else when Kyoko spotted Ryouga.

"Oh no! I'm coming, Ryouga-kun!" She ran off to help him, but had made it
no more than halfway when Sash began spinning her weighted sashes at the
cheerleader, forcing Kyoko to avoid them and preventing her from closing
the distance to Ryouga. Ai had no time to help out either as she found
herself set upon by the paired fighting team of Rei Za and Shi Fan. She was
struck a number of times in rapid succession once more, unable to defend
herself.

Shampoo's break from attention did not last long as another Amazon swung
her staff towards the purple-haired one. As Shampoo remembered it, the girl
was very skilled save for one thing. 

She allowed her Amazon sister to move in close, taking a glancing blow from
the staff. "I know you!" Shampoo declared. "You're So Fu. The one with the
glass..."

Shampoo connected with a blow to So Fu's mouth, dropping her instantly. 

"...jaw."

It really was remarkable that the girl hadn't tried to cover her weakness
better, not that Shampoo wasn't delighted by the hole in her defense. There
was no time to enjoy her victory as two more Amazons came after her,
forcing her to do nothing more than dodge once again.


Akane finally arrived to witness the carnage. At first she had remained
behind, weeping, convinced Ranma had rejected her when he left for Shampoo.
Then the sounds of fighting broke out in the direction Ranma and Shampoo
had taken. Her feet moved of their own accord as her concern for Ranma's
safety outweighed her pain for the moment and she rushed to the noise. Now
she could see a number of women dressed in Chinese style clothing and
bearing weapons, surrounding Shampoo and assaulting her friends. 

"Amazons," Akane said out loud. They could solve everything. All they had
to do was take Shampoo back to China and out of Akane's hair. Of course
that would also mean Shampoo's death.

A soft sigh parted from Akane's lips. It did not matter what Shampoo did to
her or how much she hated the Amazon. No one deserved to be killed. Akane
went forward and prepared to risk her life to save someone she didn't even
like. 

The first one she encountered was Boudoir. Before Akane knew it the Amazon
charged forward with her battle ax and attacked. 


Ai suffered a punch to her kidneys as she evaded a swordstroke from Shi
Fan. Tears formed in her eyes, not from the tremendous beating she was
receiving at the hands of the synchronized pair, but because she was
failing Ukyou. Her chef was still tied up and left to the mercy of any
passing Amazon. Ai swore she would not succumb to her injuries until she
could save Ukyou. Nothing could stop her. 

Rei Za and Shi Fan backed off for a moment, then nodded towards one
another. It was time to finish Ai off, and they were going to do it with
style. Rei Za leaped atop Shi Fan's shoulders.

"<Two Bodies Double Team Attack!>" They began spinning around.

Perfume heard the battle cry and spared a glance in their direction. "<YOU
IDIOTS!!! We don't have time for you to screw everything up!>"

Shi Fan was about to shout back they were executing the move perfectly when
Rei Za went flying off of her shoulders. "<Oops!>" It appeared they were
going to need a little more work on that particular maneuver.

Rei Za's flight ended abruptly when she struck Tablet squarely on the head,
knocking her out. Rei Za herself was too stunned to apologize to the
unconscious girl. 

Shi Fan grimaced from where she stood and prayed her partner was all right.
She returned her attention to Ai, who had gained a second wind and was
ready to fight once more. Shi Fan swung one of her twin scimitars. Ai
deflected the first two thrusts with her baton, but had one of the attacks
lightly score across her chest, causing a small rivulet of blood to trickle
down. The fourth strike never came as a bolt of electricity struck the
sword, shocking Rei Za into unconsciousness. 

Ai looked in the direction the bolt had originated. Minami gave Ai a wide
smile and flashed her standard V for victory sign. "Looks like Ukyou's bed
won't go cold tonight after all." Ai lacked the energy to correct her
savior. 

Minami examined the scene before her with disgust. "More martial arts
crap," she complained. "All right ladies. Time to kiss your collective
butts good-bye cause this ghost sweeper is going to cut loose!" She cast a
spell at an Amazon, causing the ground to explode around her, knocking the
warrior out. "Too easy," Minami said as she drew out the hilt to her
magical blade.

"Look out!" 

Ai's warning came too late as the recovered Rei Za hurled her mace at the
back of Minami's head. The blow connected, knocking the ghost sweeper out.
Ai's own breather was short lived as her original opponent recovered enough
to attack her once more. To make matters worse Rei Za joined in, driving Ai
on the defensive once more.


"<The boy's phenomenal!>" Foam proclaimed.

Soap agreed. "<I can't believe how much punishment he can absorb!>"

"<Make sure you don't damage him permanently. We'll take him back home with
us!>" Foam allowed herself a lascivious chuckle while kicking Ryouga in the
ribs.

Soap laughed too as she blocked the retaliatory fist Ryouga aimed at Foam.
"<But who gets him first?>"

Old instincts flared as Foam wanted to say she should be allowed first
crack at him, of course, but she dismissed the feeling, allowing one of
friendship to overwhelm it. "<We'll share. That'll really test his
endurance.>"

As Foam finished her statement Ryouga remained motionless for just a
moment. Both girls saw the opening and took advantage of it, lashing out at
Ryouga with  a double blow of steel. Ryouga didn't move as he braced
himself and allowed both blows to connect, absorbing the punishment and
shutting out the pain. For a moment both Amazons mirrored Ryouga's action
by remaining stationary as well, though theirs was from the shock that
Ryouga could take such blows rather than from any plan. It was his turn as
he grabbed both girls by their collars and roughly brought their heads
together, then tossed them twenty feet away. Both girls struggled to get
up.

"<That's one tough man,>" Soap barely managed to get out.

Foam tried shaking her head free of its cobwebs. "<I can't decide if he's
too frisky or if I want him more than ever. Maybe I'd better wait until my
ears stop ringing before I decide.>"


Perfume hit Ranma with a lightning fast series of punches and kicks to the
chest, knocking him down for the tenth time. He got back to his feet and
charged Perfume once more. She evaded the attack and struck him in the
stomach. 

"Stay down, you idiot! You can't win!" Much to her disgust he slowly rose
to his feet again. It was becoming increasingly difficult to keep her
promise if the fool was going to continue to get up when he should have
been lying out cold on the ground. As beaten as he was, he couldn't
possibly defeat her. The most he had been able to do was connect with
couple of punches early in the fight, and they were weak things that she
barely took the time to notice.

"Guess...again." He tried a leap kick, a painfully slow one in which she
caught him at the ankle and threw him in the ground. He twisted out of her
grasp and got to his feet once more, only to have Perfume strike him with
an elbow and knee, driving him to the ground again.

Perfume was left wondering if running him through with her naginta would
even be enough to stop him, then she saw Foam and Soap go flying and Ryouga
move to help Ukyou. That concerned her. Anyone that could handle those two
was a serious threat, and Perfume couldn't help noticing more of her pack
was on the ground than their opponents. 

"<Take this boy!>" she commanded the nearby Shelf. "<But don't kill him.
Just pretend he's coming on to you.>"

"<Your wish is my command,>" Shelf said wistfully, winking as she rushed
past Perfume and confronted Ranma. Perfume inwardly groaned. So Shelf liked
women as well, who would have thought it? Not that Perfume cared in the
slightest, except for the fact she seemed to be the target of Shelf's
affections. She cut off Ryouga before he could get to Ukyou.

"Out of the way!" Ryouga threatened. The brawl with Foam and Soap, and the
pounding he had taken, went a long way to convincing him it was perfectly
fine to fight girls who hit him first.

"I don't think so."

Both drew back their fists and punched at one another. Perfume didn't
bother crying out as she employed the Fist of the Thunderbolt, confident
that whatever her opponent threw at her she could take from her Bakusai
Tenketsu training. Both fists met flesh at the same time. 

Both opponents found themselves flying backward from the force of the
blows. Perfume was the first to regain her footing, albeit in more pain
than she thought she would suffer from one mere punch. Worse, Ryouga was
still semi-conscious and making his way to his feet. If he could take a
beating at Soap and Foam's hands and still remain cognizant from a Fist of
the Thunderstrike, she didn't want to find out what it would be like
fighting him when he wasn't worn down.


Akane was winning her duel with Boudoir, despite the injuries she had
suffered in her fight with Shampoo, when a second Amazon struck her in the
back of the head, rendering her insentient for a few moments. 

Boudoir stared crossly at the girl that had assisted her. "<I could have
handled her.>"

The girl just crossed her arms and looked unconvinced. Boudoir waved her
off. "<Time to finish her.>" She raised the battle ax high above her head.


Shampoo barely managed to evade another club and bonbori swung at her. She
was almost finished. There was no way she could take more than two more
solid hits before pain would overcome her and she would not be able to
avoid any more attacks. As she leaped high in the air she managed to glance
around to see what was happening, then wished she hadn't.

Kodachi was holding her own against Cabinet. Sash was chasing Kyoko around.
Mousse was losing badly to Julep. Ai was almost unconscious from the double
team she was receiving. Perfume seemed to have Ryouga under control, and
Soap and Foam were coming back, Minami had already fallen. Akane was about
to be cut in half. And Ranma...for the first time since the start of the
fight she got a good look at him. He had lied. He promised he would not
fight to the death, but from the horrible bruises and numerous cuts all
over his body it was obvious he should have been driven into
unconsciousness somewhere around fifty blows ago, yet he continued to rise
and tried to fight. He was going to get himself killed at any moment.

"<STOP!!!>" Shampoo shouted at the top of her lungs. The roar made all the
combatants hesitate a moment, gaining their attention. "<I'll go back.>
I'll return." She switched between the two languages, allowing everyone to
understand.

"No," Ranma managed to get out through swollen lips. "You can't. You
know..." he stopped before he let too much out. "...you have to stay here.
You know why."

Shampoo shook her head. Even if they somehow managed to win most of her
friends weren't going to make it, Ranma among them. It would be a pointless
waste. "It's over."

"<All of you, stand down!>" Perfume ordered.

"<Aww!>" Boudior complained. "<I was just about to finish...>" she trailed
off as a small bird buzzed around her head. 

"<Sparrow,>" Boudoir whispered, staring at it but an instant before calling
out for a blanket or some other piece of large cloth and some hot water.
Mousse provided both, understanding what was going on.

Ranma made his way over to Shampoo, trying to stand protectively next to
her, despite his pain. The gesture did not go unnoticed and Akane felt her
heart breaking further.

"What's going on?" Ranma asked.

Shampoo looked at him for a moment before she realized why he didn't
understand. "That's our best messenger. If she's come all the way to Japan
to deliver a message it must be important."

"So it's like, what, a carrier pigeon?"

Shampoo shook her head. It was an easy enough mistake. "Not quite. You'll
see."

The bird landed and Boudoir placed the blanket over it. Hot water followed
and up from the blanket rose a pretty young girl of about ten. She wrapped
the blanket around herself then began moving her hands in an intricate
patter of gestures to Boudoir.

"I get it. That's a neat idea. Makes sense that she could travel faster as
a bird," Ranma said approvingly. 

"Yes. She accidentally fell into the Spring of Drowned Sparrow when she was
no more than four. She's Boudoir's sister. Her name's Sparrow." Shampoo
said. "Well, it's not her real name, but everyone's called her that for
years. I don't think even her own family remembers what it used to be."

"Why's she doing that stuff with the hands? Is it some kind of way of
making sure it's a legitimate message?"

"No. She's mute."

Ranma raised an eyebrow at that. "Your best messenger is a mute?"

Shampoo nodded. "Ironic, isn't it? I don't know her personally, but no one
has ever said anything bad about her. And she does her job well."

Sparrow finished communicating with her sister and both turned to look
towards Cologne, who had walked up to the duo. Boudoir brought out one of
her outfits for Sparrow to wear, then translated the message. "<She says
the council has ordered all of us to return. The Musk is on the move and
all of the villagers are to return home to help in the defense. We're to go
back immediately.>"

"<Good thing we found Xian-Pu before we got that order,>" Shelf said as she
grinned evilly at Shampoo.

Perfume cursed to herself at the same time Shelf was making her comment. If
only they had received the message just a few hours earlier, then
everything would have been all right. But the world was not composed of
what ifs, just what was. "<We'll head back now.>" 

Cologne cleared her voice. "<In light of these new orders, I will take
charge. I trust there are no arguments?>" she directed the question towards
Perfume, who assented immediately.

It was at that time Silk arrived and silently assessed the situation. She
was too late.

"<Nice to see you, Silk. It has been a very LONG time,>" Perfume intoned
with more than a hint of anger in her voice. She was going to give the
woman a piece of her mind when they were alone. How could Silk have arrived
too late to help Shampoo? She should have beaten the hunt pack by at least
a week, if not longer. 

Silk held her head in disgrace. She had failed, and it was all the fault of
that ship from hell. Even with her recriminations she noted she still
smelled like fish from her travel on it.

Several of the beaten Amazons started to come around. As their senses
returned each one began to think with one primary thought. 'Which outsider
beat me?' 

Cologne sorted things out in short order so that things didn't return to a
brawl; a round of kisses of death could not be afforded. She simply called
it a large scale fight, and since there were no proper one-on-one battles
due to the large nature of the conflict, anyone defeated would not be
forced to administer kisses of death or marriage, much to Kyoko's relief.
She didn't like the way the girl she had pom-pomed was scowling at her. 

Rei Za tried to look inconspicuous as Minami began interrogating the
Amazons about who had given her a 'cheap shot' from behind. Rei Za might
not have been the smartest girl around, but she knew enough not to mess
with full fledged magi. Especially one's that muttered about how certain
Amazons were going to end up eating flies for the rest of their lives.
Varying degrees of suspicion and anger went through the other members of
both sides. Neither one was eager to make friends, but the peace appeared
as though it was going to hold.

Ranma began talking quietly in Shampoo's ear. "Look, now that they're
distracted we can make a break for it. Don't worry about your leg. I'm
pretty sure I got enough strength that I can carry you out of here without
them catching us."

Shampoo examined him more closely. As fast as his powers of recovery were,
he was still in horrible shape. It appeared to be taking a great deal of
energy for him to simply remain upright. And now he was proposing to run
off, while carrying her, faster then Julep could run. The poor, deluded
heroic fool. "I can't."

"Yes you can," he growled. "I know why you stopped the fight, and you're
probably right. Some of our friends might have been hurt. But now it's over
and we can get you out of here."

"I can't go."

"Damn it!" he snarled. "Don't you get it? If you go back to China they're
going to kill you! I can't let that happen!"

"And I can't run anymore," she said as she felt her heart race at Ranma's
concern. If only the situation were different and she could enjoy his
consideration for her. "They know I was here and even if I run today, once
the current mess is over with at home, they'd just come back with more of
my people than before. And if I left they'll try to find me, maybe
threatening those I befriended in the hopes they'll know where I went.
Amazon justice can be a terrible thing, and running away after I've been
captured would just ensure they'll try all the harder to track me down. I
don't want to have to look over my shoulder for the rest of my life. It
won't matter if I get a cure. Resisting an order directly from the council
can be almost as bad, and fleeing now means I would be defying them twice.
There's no way they'll let me do that and get away with it.

"And if I try running and they track me down I'd have to fight them.
They're my sisters, Ranma. I don't want to hurt, let alone kill, any of
them, not when they think they're doing the right thing. I can't stand the
thought of people being hurt, not over this, anyway. It's just," her voice
caught. "It's just easier this way. Going with them is the only way no one
else will be hurt."

"Except you," Ranma said flatly. 

"Can you think of some other way out?" Shampoo asked, trying to convince
him this was the only option left.

"There's always a way," he protested.

"No. There isn't 'always a way', and there isn't one now."

"I ain't letting you go marching off to your death because you think you're
being noble."

"You can't stop me." She tried making her voice firm and spoke in a
commanding tone. "And if you try I'll have my sisters stop you."

Ranma drew back at the threat, then crossed his arms while staring at her.
"You said that's what you wanted to avoid."

She should have known threatening him would just make him more determined
to prevent her from leaving. The boy was pig headed and twice as stubborn
as any mule. She tried searching for words to convince him to let her go,
but she could come up with nothing. Perhaps her great grandmother could do
something to disable him without hurting him.

"Are you sure there ain't any other way?" Ranma asked, his voice much
softer now.

Shampoo tried figuring out why his demeanor had changed, but could come up
with nothing. He was ever the enigma to her. "If there was, don't you think
I would take it? I don't want to have to go back, but it's the only way."

Ranma sighed. "Then I'm going too."

Shampoo stared at him in wide-eyed shock for a moment. As much as she
wanted him at her side it was definitely not for the best. "You can't."

"Either I go with you now, or I don't let you go at all. Make up your mind
or I'm going to haul you over my shoulder and run off with you, Amazons be
damned."

As much as she wanted to curse at him, she couldn't help but be moved by
the gesture. "As long as you promise not to risk your life, I'll let you go
along."

"No."

"Ranma, don't do this," she protested. 

"No. You once told me I can't always get my way. Well you can't either. I'm
going with you."

"I don't want you to be hurt because of me." She didn't want to cry, not
with all of her sisters watching. It would be too humiliating.

"I seem to remember saying the exact same thing to you. Do you remember
your answer?"

She would never forget the night of their heart-to-heart on the open seas,
and he was right; there was no way she would ever convince him to remain
behind. That would be going against Ranma's intrinsic nature. She would
have to seek another solution on the way to China. It was the only way she
was going to convince him not to do something rash right now and probably
get killed. "You can go. I won't try to stop you."

"About time," he said.

She turned away from him then and cast her eyes towards the ground, feeling
more than a little weak in the knees. As much as she wanted him safe, she
was still moved to tears from his concern.

At last several others from the disrupted wedding made their way to the
battle ground. Including Genma, Nodoka, and the rest of the Tendos.

"What's going on?" Nodoka was the first to ask. Whatever was going on
before her obviously had nothing to do with her son being married to Akane,
not that either of them appeared to be in any shape to have a wedding now.

Akane spoke first. "Shampoo's going back to China. Ranma's going along and
so am I." She had caught just enough of the conversation to understand what
Ranma was doing, and would be damned if she was going to stand idly by
while Ranma threw his life away, even if he had chosen Shampoo over her.

"But what about the wedding," Nodoka protested. 

Ranma looked to his mother. "It's on hold for now. This is going to be
resolved first, one way or another."

"I'm going with you, Ranchan," Ukyou spoke up, helping to override any
other protests that might be raised.

"So am I," was said simultaneously by Ai and Ryouga, who then scowled at
one another.

All of the others volunteered after that including a recovered Kunou, the
parents, and Kasumi. The only one that balked was Nabiki. 

"Look, as much as I'd like to, there isn't really any reason why I should
go. I'll keep track of things back here." She was damned if she was going
to stick her neck out for either Ranma or Shampoo. Things were bad enough
with everyone else in her family going, but she was not going to follow in
all the others foolish footsteps.

"Kasumi should stay too," Soun said.

"I'm going," Kasumi insisted. She was not simply going to let Shampoo march
off to her death. There was something she could think of that would help.
There had to be.

Genma turned to Nodoka. "It might be best for you to stay here as well."

Nodoka turned in anger towards Genma. "I have not seen my son for more than
ten years! I am not going to allow him to go off to some foreign land and
possibly not see him again for who knows how long! I am going as well!"

Genma knew better than to argue with his wife when she was in that kind of
a mood, so he nodded his head in agreement.

The group of Amazons appeared more than a little concerned at the suddenly
burgeoning group before them. If a second fight was to occur the outcome
might be in doubt. Some of them were about to protest when Cologne spoke up
and said it was all right. None among the hunt pack had the nerve to
question their elder's thinking and remained silent.

Silk, Perfume, and Cologne talked to one another off to the side. "Things
don't look very good for Shampoo. Maybe one of those others will have some
idea on how to keep Shampoo's life from being forfeit. I am presently at a
loss," Cologne said.

"We're going to need a miracle," Perfume added, though if she knew the
nature of the disturbance back home, she might somehow figure out a way to
use it to protect Shampoo.

"If we have all of these people with us we're going to need a large ship to
accommodate them, not that I would mind waiting for a while," Cologne said
as she held her hand to her chin in thought. "But Sparrow's message was
urgent. I have a responsibility to my people that takes precedent over my
family. As much as it pains me we have to get back home at once."

Silk gave a wide smile. "I think I know of a ship that has plenty of room
on it. With any luck it's still in port and we can take it home." Unlike
the others she felt more responsibility for Shampoo's predicament then
whatever troubles were brewing at home. It was her failure that she had not
been there to warn Shampoo of what was coming, and now Shampoo was going to
pay the consequences for that. Buying her some time was the least Silk
could do, even if it placed her people in jeopardy.

"Then we go now," Cologne said. "We are heading immediately for a ship.
Whoever is coming along, follow!" 

Shampoo and Ranma found themselves surrounded by the members of the hunt
pack, who weren't taking any chances on an escape. Silk and Cologne made
their way up side-by-side with the couple in the middle. Then, with the
four in the center, the ring of warriors began to move towards the port.
They were followed by a huge group consisting of: Soun, Genma, Nodoka,
Kasumi, Kodachi, Kunou, Mousse, Akane, Ai, Ukyou, Ryouga, Kyoko, and
Minami. Each was going along to protect someone or someone's they cared
for, even though the objects of said protection varied widely. 


Nabiki watched the group go, a small part of her wanting to travel
alongside them, but it would be a mistake. She was not a fighter and would
just be in the way. True, she was probably the smartest of the lot, but the
feeling she had received from the group of Amazons, especially Perfume,
made her feel the matter would only be resolved through force of arms. It
was as though the time for talk had already passed, and all that was left
to do was decide how to consummate the choices that had been made. If
Shampoo was even half-way accurate in her interpretation of the laws of the
Joketsuzoku, there was no way out for her. Execution was the only fate that
awaited the Amazon, and there was nothing Nabiki could do. There was
nothing anyone could do about it, and as much as Shampoo had grown on her,
as a cash cow, it was ultimately no one's business but Shampoo's, and
possibly Ranma's, what happened next. 

Getting in that mess was a mistake. No one else should have been involved,
certainly not Nabiki's family. No good would come of it and there was
nothing a small group like the one traveling with Shampoo could do to
prevent whatever was going to happen to her. Even one as inexperienced in
fighting as Nabiki could tell the only way they could win Shampoo's freedom
by force was to make a break for it now, when there were only twenty or so
Amazons to deal with. In China they would be in a hostile land and
outnumbered. There would be no chances there. 

The only thing she found reassuring was Kasumi and Nodoka's presence with
the others. The martial artists might erupt in some kind of testosterone
frenzy to throw their lives away, save for the fact there were two
non-fighters that would need to be protected. Nodoka should be able to
reign in Ranma should he try to do something foolish, hopefully, and Soun
would keep an eye on Kasumi. And at the very least Shampoo would never
allow anything to happen to Nabiki's older sister. At least that was what
Nabiki hoped. And in any event nothing she could do would make a
difference.

Perhaps it was time to go to a shrine and pray for her family's safe
delivery. Faith in the intangible was not something Nabiki exactly felt
comfortable doing, but it couldn't hurt. She was about to go find one when
she saw a wonderful image before her eyes that brightened her mood
considerably. It was one badly beaten Pantyhose Tarou that slowly made his
way to her. She had had the pleasure of watching the end of his much
deserved beating at Ranma's hands. How unfortunate her camcorder jammed up
on her when she tried to tape it. If it hadn't, she would have distributed
over hundred copies of it for free, just to show the world Tarou's
humiliation.

"Where's Akane going?"  he gasped out.

If only she had had another camera to capture the moment. "China. Shampoo's
being taken home and the others are going along to try to figure a way out
for her." She had to tell him. It wasn't like he wouldn't follow and find
out anyway. And maybe Nabiki would get lucky and Pantyhose would not return
at all. 

Tarou groaned at that. Why couldn't Akane let Fem-boy go and die with the
Amazon? Things would be so much better that way. A happy ending for all
that mattered. He left Nabiki behind as he rushed to catch up to Akane.
Nabiki had been correct. There was no way he would allow Akane to be
harmed. Not by a longshot. Besides, Ranma still needed to get beaten up
over what had happened before. It was a fluke. Tarou could take Fem-boy, he
just knew it.

Once he was out of sight, there was one, admittedly disgusting, thought
about him that made Nabiki glad he was going. He wouldn't let Akane come to
harm. He may have been slime in every other regard, but he would give his
life to protect her sister, and as much as Nabiki despised him, she was
suddenly very grateful he was going along.

"Will wonders never cease?" she said out loud. There was one other thought
that went through Nabiki's mind as she went in search of a shrine. Those
serve who also wait. Well she was going to find that out firsthand. 


Cologne looked to Silk again. Her friend was continuing to behave
strangely. "<You're certain this ship can accommodate all of us?>"

Silk smiled in return. "<Oh yes. It's ideally suited for our needs.>"


Aki and Frog looked out at the docks from one of the sides of The Worthless
Piece of Shit, enjoying the sight of dry land. 

"The others have finished loading supplies," the Spaniard said sadly. "Any
idea where we're heading next?" 

That was a loaded  question if ever there was one. Fortunately Aki didn't
pick up on it. "I still can't believe he did it."

Frog nodded his head. "I know what you mean."

"We finally got our hands on some money," Aki continued her rant, her anger
building by the moment. "We could have bought a radar system, or a radio
that works over a distance of more than fifty miles, or we could have
cleaned up the ship. But what does he use it for?! A GODDAMN FREDERICK'S OF
HOLLYWOOD LINGERIE FRANCHISE!!!"

Frog already knew the situation but it would be better to let her vent her
frustrations. "I can hardly believe it myself."

"What good is a damn lingerie store on a boat?!" Aki continued to smolder
in anger.

"Hey! Those things can come in pretty handy. You never know when a
passenger will want some sexy, silky undergarments to turn me...err some
guy on that might catch their interest, and now we can provide them with
that service."

Both crewmen turned angrily towards the speaker. Captain D'Amore had come
staggering out of the ship, a near empty bottle of Jack Daniels in his
hand. He bore a bleary-eyed look while his blue long-sleeved shirt and
light black trousers appear rumpled, as though he had just gotten out of
bed.

"Well, well, well, look what's come back from the dead," Frog said acidly
as he shot a spiteful stare at the captain. 

Aki was just as pleased. "How's the hangover, Captain?!" she said loudly in
the hopes that she would increase whatever headache he had.

"I only had two bottles. Nowhere near enough to get drunk. I'm just happily
buzzed," he replied while holding his head.

"Too bad," Frog watched the captain sway back and forth. Perhaps they would
get lucky and D'Amore would fall overboard and drown.

There was no such luck as D'Amore went to the railing and remained on deck.
He looked towards the city, letting the fresh air clear his head, when he
sensed something. He perked up and began looking around, eyes searching the
docks intently.

Aki noticed the change immediately as the captain's nose twitched. "What is
it?"

D'Amore gazed towards the shore. "By the pricking of my thumb, something
busty this way comes."

"Just what the hell is that supposed to mean?!" Aki shouted. 

D'Amore took no time for explanations as he stared off into the distance
until he spotted what set off his senses. "Women! A whole group of
beautiful women and they're heading to my ship! I have to prepare for
them!"

He smiled as widely as he could and concentrated. At the rate the group was
approaching there was hardly any time left. He continued smiling and
summoned all of his strength. It had to work. It had to or he wasn't a
D'Amore. It took almost all of his strength, but at last it happened.

His teeth gleamed.

"BWHAHAHAHAHA!!! Success!" 

Both Aki and Frog stared at him as though he had gone mad. Then they saw
the change. Rather than the disheveled, bleary-eyed drunk that was there
moments before, there now stood a fully cognizant, scandalously handsome
looking rouge before them. He ran his hand through his hair once, all of it
falling into place as though it had been coiffured by a professional. Even
his clothing shifted in appearance, as though it had been pressed but
moments ago. The captain merrily skipped towards the gangplank, whistling
'The Girl's Got a Crush on Me.'

If Aki hadn't known the man was a completely amoral, irresponsible,
lecherous, narcissistic, dumb as a brick drunkard she would have been
impressed. As it was she settled for forming a sweatdrop behind her head
and saying, "That man scares the hell out of me sometimes."

Frog could do nothing more than nod his head.


Ranma took one look at the ship before them and smiled for the first time
all day. "We just got ourselves an extension." 

Everyone not previously acquainted with The Worthless Piece of Shit stared
at the ship in disgust. More than one Amazon balked at the idea of boarding
something that appeared to be seaworthy only in the sense that it was
currently in the sea and didn't appear to be sinking at the moment. After
receiving a fourth reassurance from Silk that the craft would not sink as
soon as it went out to sea, Cologne ordered the others to board the vessel.
Perfume was the first up the gangplank, only to see that the captain and
several of the crew were already present and waiting for them.

D'Amore took note that most of the people appeared to have recently come
from a fight. It didn't matter; he could see which ones were pretty behind
the bruises. 

"What a beautiful and lovely woman to come aboard my ship. Allow me to
introduce myself. My name is Captain D'Amore, and I am at your service." He
took Perfume's hand, bent low and went to kiss it. 

The instant Perfume first laid eyes upon him she knew what kind of man he
was. She allowed her hand to make it to his lips, then calmly pulled it out
at the last instant, leaving D'Amore to kiss at nothing but air.

"Rejected!" one of the crew said from his position behind D'Amore.

"Shut up!" he snarled and went to kiss the hand of the next lovely maiden.
"Miss Shampoo!" he said in pleasant surprise. "Welcome back aboard my
vessel." He took her hand and went to kiss it as well. An instant before it
would have made contact she smacked him across his face.

"Don't touch me!" She huffed and walked away from him. How could she ever
have regarded him as anything other than a lecherous Casanova? He was less
than dirt when compared to Ranma.

D'Amore rubbed his face. Why was she angry with him? Usually the only time
he received slaps like that was -after- he slept with a woman. Maybe she
was still frigid. That and one of the men she was with were the only
reasonable explanations he had for when she refused his advances the last
time she was on the ship. 

The next one up was Ranma, who scowled at D'Amore even more fiercely than
the last time they had met. 

"Hello, Mr. Sap-to-me," D'Amore said with deliberate ease. "It looks like
someone beat the hell out of the undefeatable martial artist. Too bad." The
captain remembered Ranma all too well. He was one of the reasons the
'Conquest of Shampoo' had failed, and the whelp never showed the captain
proper respect. Well, none of the crew did that either, but Ranma was more
than a little cocky about it, which irritated D'Amore to no end. "It's nice
to have you back."

"Drop dead." Ranma followed right behind Shampoo.

D'Amore would deal with the young pup later. There was another girl coming
on board. A cute looking tomboy that appeared to have been in a fight too,
not that she didn't still look attractive to the captain's eyes. "Welcome
aboard." He took her hand, only to have an elbow buried on top of his head
when he bent down to kiss the appendage. 

"Pervert!" Akane growled and took back her elbow and hand from the captain,
who now had a splitting headache. He shook it off as he watched Akane
follow the waiting Ranma, who was scowling at D'Amore even more intently
than before, then turned to see a hand being offered to him. He gazed into
the face of the one offering it to him. It was the decidedly unattractive
Cabinet. D'Amore shook the hand, much to Cabinet's disappointment, and the
Amazon boarded the ship.

D'Amore turned to the next one; a very cute looking girl with brown hair
and glasses. 

The girl just stared at him as she placed her hands on her hips. "Do you
have any idea how many germs live in the mouth?" Tablet asked. 

D'Amore was caught more than a little off guard by the question. "No."

"Millions. Now if you think for one second I would let your mouth come near
any part of me, think again."

For the first time in recent memory D'Amore was struck speechless as the
girl went past. Was he losing his touch? Never had so many women resisted
his handsome features. The next passenger was dressed in a tuxedo and had a
large spatula strapped to their back.

"Welcome aboard, sir."

"I'm a girl!" Ukyou shouted back irritably.

Cross-dresser. How wonderful. Though now that he got a good look at her she
wasn't at all bad looking. For a cross-dresser.

Ukyou moved on only to be followed by Ai. D'Amore kept from drooling. He
could do that over her later. "Welcome aboard." 

Ai never let his hand near hers. "After what you did to my Ukyou, you can
forget about it!" 

Ai quickly followed her chef, leaving the captain to stare after her. The
girl had said 'my Ukyou'. The two were lesbians? That was wrong! It was
such a waste of potentially attractive partners. Silently he vowed to do
what he could to get them set on the proper course of male to female
relationships...with him, naturally. If he couldn't make them switch back,
no one could.

The next one appeared to be a potential winner; a cute, peppy little thing
that appeared to be full of energy. He always enjoyed energetic ones.
"Welcome aboard." He went to grab her hand, but found a second person
blocking the way. 

"Don't let him touch you," Ryouga warned Kyoko while staring evilly at
D'Amore. "Aki said he's got diseases."

"Yuck!" Kyoko said and stuck her tongue out. "That's gross!" She walked off
with Ryouga.

"That's a lie!" D'Amore shouted, more than a little flustered at the
accusation. Besides, penicillin had taken care of that particular problem a
while ago.

Captain D'Amore was beginning to panic. Never had he had so many women to
charm and failed so miserably at it. 

"You can kiss my hand."

He turned to look at the woman who had offered. Before him was a gnarled
old troll sitting atop a staff. A lesser man would have turned green at the
suggestion, but D'Amore would never allow his perfect complexion to be
tainted in such a manner. Instead he recoiled on the inside. "Sorry. I wish
I could do so, but my ship beckons me and there are many things I still
need to do. Someone else will greet the rest of you." Let one of his crew
suffer the rejections of the women. D'Amore needed a break.


As Minami walked aboard the ship she felt something shoot through her. At
first she wasn't sure of it from the shore, but the closer she got to the
ship the more the feeling grew. Now that she was in physical contact with
the ship she was convinced of one thing: the craft was full of powerful
magic. The problem was she could not be certain where it stopped and the
ship began. It unquestionably permeated the craft, and was perhaps
inexorably intertwined with every fiber of the vessel. In any case she
certainly would have to investigate it more thoroughly. It wasn't every day
one came across a ship that was magical.


Ranma followed Shampoo to the room assigned to her. The two had been silent
since they left the captain behind on the deck.

"You're sure you'll be all right?" Ranma asked. "I don't want none of those
Amazons bothering you or finding out about the curse."

Shampoo gave a soft smile. "Great grandmother said I was under her
authority now and wasn't to be bothered by them. Perfume reinforced that as
well."

"I can't believe after what you did for her that that..." Ranma took a
moment to come up with the right word to describe Perfume, but failed,
settling on, "...witch hunted you down like some kind of criminal!"

"I think there's more to it than that." Shampoo was a little surprised at
her defense of her old friend, all things considered. "I'll ask her later."
Shampoo looked into the room and back to Ranma. "You can come in if you
like."

Ranma jumped back as though she had tried to throw a punch at him. "Ah! No.
I have to go." He relaxed a bit. "I also got to tell Akane about what's
going on. I saw the way she was looking at me and she's already jumping to
conclusions, though I guess under the circumstances I can't blame her. We
were supposed to be married by now. She might not be happy about what I'm
going to say, but I gotta let her know where I stand. Then I have to
explain things to Mom and Pop." Depression grew as he realized exactly what
that was going to entail. It was going to break his mother's heart. He was
not going to be getting any rest in the near future, and his body still
ached from the combined beatings of Tarou, Perfume, and Shelf. He was on
the verge of collapsing on the spot.

Shampoo looked downcast at his refusal. Somewhere deep down inside she had
hoped the fight might have coalesced his feelings towards her. Of course
there was a slew of other impending problems to deal with now. It wouldn't
do for Ranma to choose her only to end up receiving a death sentence. Some
heavy thinking was going to have to be done to keep her out of trouble this
time, and nothing was coming to mind.

The two made their good-byes. Ranma walked off while Shampoo lay down on
her bed and shut her eyes for a few moments to try to clear her head. She
was asleep within moments.


Ranma slowly made his way to the room Akane had been assigned. For a
change, he was trying to think of what to say beforehand instead the usual
spouting out with whatever came to mind. Too bad nothing was coming to
mind. At least nothing that was not going to upset her, and he didn't want
to hurt her, not any more than he already had. Akane deserved better than
that, a lot better, but there was just no way around it. No matter what he
was going to do now, it would end up hurting someone he cared for deeply. 

"Why me?" he lamented.

Ranma stopped for a moment to bolster his resolve. Fighting demons and
monsters he could do without flinching. Give him a girl to talk to in a
heart-to-heart conversation and he found his courage wanting. Maybe he was
just weird. As hard as he tried, there was still nothing coming to mind
that would help him explain things to Akane without her getting mad. There
was no other choice then. He continued on to her room, and knocked. 

It was a few moments before a 'come in' answered. Ranma entered to see
Akane sitting on her bed, looking exhausted in her still torn wedding
dress. It had been beautiful at the start of the day. Now it was in
tatters, maybe just like his relationship with his fiancee.

She looked at him for only a moment before turning her back to him. Even in
the brief instant he saw her face it was more than enough. Her eyes had
been red-rimmed and still somewhat moist. She had been crying, and he was
almost certainly the cause of it.

The feeling in his heart threatened to overwhelm him. How could he have
allowed himself to do this to her? She was Akane, and in spite of all the
problems they had had over the months since first meeting, she still meant
the world to him. Hurting her was the last thing he wanted to do, yet he
had done it anyway. No one had forced him to follow Shampoo, but he had. He
could have gone through with everything and would be married right now,
talking with everyone at the reception while panicking about what the
future would hold, but at least Akane would have been happy. Instead she
was sitting in a ruined wedding dress, suffering from injuries by his other
love interest, as well as a horde of Amazons, while on a ship supposedly
bound for China, though in truth there was no telling where they would end
up.

He wanted to say something glib like, 'bet you didn't think our wedding day
was going to turn out like this?' but couldn't; the situation was far too
serious. Instead all that came out was, "Akane." He could think of no other
words to follow. None that would be adequate to describe what he felt, and
how sorry he was that he had hurt her.

"You don't have to say anything, Ranma."

He could hear the tears behind those words. 

"You want to be with Shampoo instead of me. Fine! Getting married was a
stupid idea anyway. It was all my father's stupid fault. I'm just glad you
figured it out before instead of after. I hope you and Shampoo have a
wonderful life together!" The last part was said through tears, but she was
trying to give him up. In spite of the words she knew she hadn't, and
wouldn't for some time to come. If only she could make the pain go away.

"I haven't decided on anything," he said softly.

That caused her to turn and look at him for only the second time since he
entered the room. "What do you mean?" Now hope had drifted into her voice.
She knew she should not allow expectations like that, but could not help it
when she heard those words.

"I don't know who I lo...like." Even now he couldn't say that. Not to her
or Shampoo. "I'm really confused. Shampoo confessed she loves me and I
don't know how I feel about that. I don't really know how I feel about you
either. I don't know anything. I need time to think about this."

"You're not trying to run off with Shampoo?" Could it be that she had been
wrong about everything? Now hope was starting to run rampant. Suddenly
there was a possibility of getting Ranma after all.

"Nope." At least not at the moment, but somehow he knew that, despite the
honesty of the statement, it would be the wrong thing to say. "I haven't
been two-timing you or anything like that. I would never intentionally hurt
you. Honest. Do you believe me?" He found himself needing her reassurance.
He still wanted her trust. If he didn't have it they were going to have
problems with any decisions he was going to have to make in the upcoming
future.

A moment passed before Akane responded softly. "Yes. I believe you."

That made him feel better. Not a lot, but some. "I'm sorry for running out
on you with the wedding and everything, but now that I got a chance to
think about it, I think waiting is for the best no matter how I choose. I
kind of felt like I had to do it. And even though I don't think marrying
you is a bad thing, because I don't, I'm pretty sure it would have been a
mistake to rush things like we were back there. If we ah..." there was no
other way to delicately put it without getting her hopes up. He certainly
did not want a repeat of saying something that sounded like a commitment
when he did not know who to commit to, like he had with Shampoo when he
caught up to her, but he was trying to be straightforward and honest. "If
we get married, I want it to be because we both want to, not cause our
parents forced us into it."

Akane could see the awkwardness in what he was trying to say. Surprisingly,
she felt relief at the confession. "I feel the same way. You really didn't
want to get married, did you?"

What she said started to panic him, then he saw the understanding in her
eyes. It wasn't an accusation. It was an honest question from concern. "I
don't think so. Not yet. Maybe in a little while, or maybe a long while,
but it definitely felt like it was too soon."

Akane raised herself to her feet and stood next to him. "I'm sorry. I think
I probably should have realized that and I should have said something to
make them wait."

Ranma shook his head. There was nothing she had to feel sorry about. He was
the one that had messed everything up for her. "It's not your fault."

"It is if I thought you might not want to go through with it and I didn't
say anything. I felt that way too, at first, but when I realized that I
loved you and wanted to go..." It had almost slipped past without her
realizing it. She had actually said the words out loud. In truth, she had
never even thought saying it to him, and would have denied even saying such
a thing before that moment. But now she had spoken, and looking more
closely at Ranma, realized he had heard it too.

"D...do you mean that?" he barely managed to stutter out.

Akane suddenly found her eyes drifting to the ground. Admitting something
like that was not easy. Being open in that way was not her style, but
denying she said it would be futile. Besides, if she wasn't open now she
might lose him to Shampoo. The time for self-denial had to be over. For
both her and Ranma's sakes. "I guess I do," she said softly, then more
firmly. "Yes. I do." Things would have been a whole lot easier if he had
said it first, though.

Even if Ranma had suspected it, to actually hear her say those words was
like a great weight had been lifted off his heart. There were now no doubts
about her feelings towards him. Unfortunately the same could not be said
about him, to a degree. He cared about her deeply, and it might very well
have been love, but he just wasn't sure, and there was no way he would lead
her on. "I don't know what to say."

Akane's thoughts were along the lines of 'you could always say you love me'
back, but that was hoping for a bit much, and she knew it. "I don't really
know anything else to say either. I think it kind of says it all."

The awkwardness of the situation caught up to him. "I got to think about
what we just talked about, y'know?" He went to the door. "I'll see you
later. You rest up, okay. You look really beat."

She was more than a little disappointed that he was leaving, but understood
why. Funny how she was suddenly getting better at that. She never seemed to
be able to understand him, but now that she had admitted her feelings he
seemed to make more sense. "So do you. And Ranma."

"Yes?"

"When you want to explain things to your parents, I'll back you up on
waiting for the wedding. Like I said, I don't want you to feel forced into
anything. If we do get married it'll be because you want to do it too." She
felt herself blush at that.

He became more nervous as well. "I think I'll take you up on that." He
certainly did not feel like trying to explain what had happened to his
parents, especially since he was so exhausted. And trying to sort out
Akane's revelation had taken more out of him than he thought possible. 

He said good-bye once more and headed to his cabin. Confronting his parents
could wait until later because he was going to collapse. He made his way to
his room, and as he predicted, fell asleep upon hitting the covers.


No one saw the diminutive form sneak aboard the ship, laughing to itself,
muttering how it really had hit the motherlode this time.


"Time to cast off!" 

One of the crewmen hoisted up the chain attached to the anchor. As it
finished being brought up he stared at it in confusion. Why were there two
anchors attached to the chain? He simply shrugged his shoulders and walked
off. The ship had plenty of strange things about it. The idea that anchors
were cloning themselves wasn't really that hard to accept.

As the crewman walked off a head popped out of one of the anchors. It spat
out water as it got out of its disguise. 

"I'll protect you, Ukyou." Tusbasa swore.


Elsewhere on the ship, reunions began to occur.

"AKI!!!"

"RYOUGA!!!" 

Ukyou, Ai, and Kyoko looked on as the two embraced. 

Aki spoke first. "I didn't think I'd get to see you so soon! It's wonderful
to see you."

"I feel the same way."

Out of nowhere Kawada, Brunt, and Frog appeared out of nowhere and spied
the embracing duo. 

"The lovers are reunited!" Kawada loudly proclaimed.

"But the atmosphere is wrong for this reunion," Frog added.

The large Brunt held a finger up. "I know just the thing to do." 

"Leave everything to us!" The trio shouted.

All three moved with precision and grabbed a table, two chairs, threw Aki
and Ryouga into them, put some spaghetti on a plate between them, dressed
up in waiters outfits, and proceeded to happily play tunes from 'Lady and
the Tramp'. 

"WOULD YOU THREE IDIOTS KNOCK IT OFF!!!" Aki roared, allowing Frog to place
one end of the spaghetti in her mouth as she closed it. Her face began to
twitch in response.

The events also had an effect on others.

"What's this about 'lovers' being 'reunited'?! You never told me anything
about an affair!" Ukyou asked, more than a hint of anger in her voice. She
missed the hurt expression Ai gave at the obvious jealousy.

Next to Ukyou, Kyoko was practically in tears. "You have another lover,
Ryouga-kun? How could you do this to me?"

"NO!!!" Ryouga shouted, sensing his impending doom. "It's not like that at
all!"

Rather than immediately denying it, Aki looked suspiciously at the pair.
"Ryouga who are these two?"

Ryouga sweatdropped as he desperately tried to figure a way out of the
situation. Having women angry at him was something he cared for about as
much as a knee to the groin. "This is Kyoko," he pointed at the
cheerleader.

"Oh," Aki lightened up considerably. "That's the one whose name you first
called out when we were in bed, right?" Those words had the predictable
effect.

"WWWWWWWAAAAAAAHHHHH!!! You are cheating on me!" Kyoko cried.

"N...n...no!" Ryouga barely managed to stammer out. 

Ukyou was in just as much shock. "You were sleeping with her?!" 

"And you are...?" Aki asked.

"I'm Ukyou Kuonji."

Aki stared at her for a moment. "Hey, wait a minute! Does he call you
Uk-chan?"

Ukyou stared at her in return. "Yes. Did he tell you that in bed too?" 

The question wasn't intended to be serious, but Aki answered with a
disgusted 'yes', then grabbed Ryouga and tore him away from trying to
comfort the bawling cheerleader. "Ryouga, I thought you told me Ukyou was a
girl. I am so disappointed in you. Not just for lying to me, but because
you never mentioned you liked guys." She stared at him suspiciously. "You
didn't try hitting on the captain, did you? I hope you got better taste
than that."

"I don't like guys!" Ryouga blustered.

"I am not a guy!" Ukyou shouted out in agreement.

"You've got no breasts, are wearing a suit, and I heard someone say that
blonde behind you is your girlfriend," Aki pointed out.

"I wear a chest wrap, she's just a friend, and I'm wearing a suit because I
was almost best woman at a wedding!"

"Isn't that 'best man'?" Aki asked.

*WHAM* 

Aki stared idly at the giant spatula planted on her head. "What?" she
asked.

"What, what?" Ukyou asked, momentarily confused by Aki's lack of reaction.

"What do you want?"

"Why are you asking me what do I want?" 

"Well, you tapped me on the head," Aki indicated the spatula. "I assumed
you wanted something."

"Tapped?" Ukyou asked, confused. She had hit Aki pretty hard for all the
male comments that had been directed at her.

Kawada cleared his throat to gain Ukyou's attention. "Striking Aki in the
head to cause damage is an exercise in futility. Her skull is, for all
intents and purposes, nearly unbreakable."

"We once sunk a ship using her like a torpedo. Ripped a huge hole through
its hull and didn't leave a mark on her noggin." Frog motioned with his
hands and added sound effects as he described the damage she inflicted.

"Too bad no one bothered to mention that I was going to be playing torpedo
before I got shot out," Aki growled as she cracked her knuckles. "I still
haven't paid you back for that one." 

Kawada spoke up once more. "Allow my associate, Mr. Brunt, to demonstrate
the veracity of the statement."

Aki looked at Kawada in confusion. "Demonstrate?" She looked behind her
just in time to see Brunt slam an I-beam on the top of her head, bending it
in half, but leaving her unaffected.

"See? Harder than rock," Kawada finished.

Ryouga watched the demonstration in horror. "You can't attack my cousin
like that!" 

Everyone stared first at Ryouga, then at Aki. Kyoko broke the silence
first.

"You've been sleeping with your cousin? WWWWWAAAAAHHHHHH!!!"

Everyone else stared in shock at the duo. Frog spoke first. "I had no
idea."

"It's not like that!" Aki protested. "We didn't know we were cousins, and
nothing happened anyway! We found out before it got that far!"

"Oh," Brunt said, then began to snicker. "You mean you came on to your
cousin, and you didn't even know it."

The other two crewmen joined in the mirth, laughing their heads off, much
to Aki's irritation. "This is why I didn't want you to say anything," she
said to Ryouga. "Now I'll never live this down."

The words started processing in Kyoko's brain as she looked to Ryouga. "So
you didn't sleep with your cousin?" 

"No." He was relieved. At last Kyoko understood.

"I'm sorry for doubting you, Ryouga-kun. I should have known you would
never sleep with someone like that."

Aki perked up at that. "Exactly what do you mean by, 'someone like that'?"

"Well," Kyoko wondered if she should remain silent, but then realized what
a mean trick Aki had played by making Kyoko think Ryouga had been sleeping
with her. "You aren't very pretty. Ryouga-kun has much better taste than to
sleep with someone as unattractive as you."

Aki's face began to twitch as she turned to Ryouga. "You'd be better off
sleeping with the guy than that cow," she said, pointing at Kyoko.

Ai hauled Ukyou away before she could hit Aki again for the guy comment
while Kyoko gave a mean stare towards Aki. "I don't like your cousin,
Ryouga. She's a real bitch."

All three of the crewmen looked on in fear at Aki. "Maybe she didn't hear
that," Kawada said.

Aki said nothing. She just stared at Kyoko.

The trio of crewmen took on a serious demeanor. Kawada took charge of the
situation. "Damn! I knew this was going to happen someday. And Aki never
replaced Felicity." He gently placed his hand on Aki's shoulder. "Calm
down." 

She paid him no attention as she continued to stare.

Frog interjected himself between Aki and Kyoko, who began to look
frightened at Aki. "Relax, Aki," he tried talking to her. "She doesn't know
any better. I'm sure she didn't mean it." It took him a moment to realize
she wasn't responding to what was being said. It was too late.

Ryouga watched on in confusion. Aki had obviously gotten angry at Kyoko for
some of the things she said, but he couldn't think of anything the
cheerleader had mentioned that was bad enough to set Aki off. On more than
one occasion Aki had gotten into shouting matches with some of the crew and
never lost her temper. "What's going on, Aki?" 

There was no response, causing Ryouga to become more concerned about his
cousin. It was almost similar to one of his depressions, except instead of
dejection she was projecting rage. He was about to approach her when it
happened. A black form suddenly sprang from her an instant. It appeared to
be a huge see-through image of a woman with short armor plates around parts
of her chest, arms, and legs. A helm covered her features, allowing only a
red glow from where her eyes would be. What he saw of the areas not covered
with the armor were muscles that defied belief.  The image hung above Aki
for a moment, then seemed to settle back inside of her.

"What was that?" Ryouga said, barely speaking loud enough to be heard.

"What was what?" Kawada asked.

Ryouga rubbed his eyes. "I saw this image of a weird-looking woman above
Aki for a moment. Then it disappeared back into her."

Kawada looked at him in disbelief. "I thought only the captain and I could
see that."

"See what? What was that?!"

Kawada shook his head. "I'll explain later. Ryouga, Aki is out of control
and will kill your girlfriend if she gets her hands on her. Try to restrain
her while Frog keeps the girl out of harms way until your cousin calms
down. I don't want to think of what's going to happen if Aki gets her hands
on the little loudmouth."

Aki took a step forward towards Kyoko, not uttering a sound. With her first
step Brunt leaped on Aki, smothering her with his huge form and tried to
brace himself by digging his feet into the deck.

"Calm down, Aki!" Brunt knew what was going to happen, but prayed he could
get through to her anyway.

His prayers went unanswered as Aki began to walk at a quick pace, as though
she did not have three hundred plus pounds of a powerful human trying to
restrain her. "I need help, Ryouga!"

Frog picked up Kyoko and ran off while Ryouga looked on in confusion. He
wasn't going to attack his cousin, no matter what the other crewmen said.
The three men were reliable, but he trusted Aki above all others. He
decided to talk to her, hoping it would calm her down.

"Hey, Aki." 

There was no response as she picked up speed and went in the direction
Kyoko had been taken.

Ryouga started following. "Umm, Aki. What's wrong?"

"Get a clue and help me stop her before she does something she regrets!"
Brunt yelled as he was carried along. 

"Aki's a nice person. She wouldn't hurt Kyoko for saying something a little
insulting like that." In truth Ryouga was beginning to get a little
worried. Aki was behaving more than a little weird, and then there was that
thing he saw above her right before she started chasing Kyoko. Kawada
hadn't acted surprised, but maybe it was controlling Aki somehow.

He gave one last try at talking to her. When she didn't respond he then
stood in front of her and braced himself. As powerful as she was, he was
still the stronger of the duo, though not by much. He held out his arms to
stop her...

...and promptly got knocked down and walked over as Aki increased her speed
to catch up to Kyoko. Ryouga picked himself up and began to panic. What had
just happened was impossible. Even Lime wasn't powerful enough to simply
walk over a well-braced Ryouga like his cousin had just done. Nothing short
of a speeding train should have been able to do that. Quickly he ran after
the ever quickening Aki. 

"Aki's never going to forgive herself if she kills that girl," Kawada said
sadly as he followed in Aki's wake.

"What's going on?!" Ryouga shouted, grabbing Kawada by the collar. "Tell
me!"

"Aki's in a berzerker fury. The only thing that could calm her down was her
cat," he explained. "It was always only a cat."

Ryouga remembered Aki's cat. "Felicity." 

"She died two weeks ago and Aki didn't get a replacement."

"So?"

"Without her cat she won't calm down. The only way she will come out of
that fury now is if she removes the source of her anger. That's the girl.
Aki didn't tell you about her problem, did she?"

"No," Ryouga admitted.

"Hardly a surprise. She won't talk about it with anyone. Not that's she's
proud of it." Kawada shuddered. "You've never seen what she can do when
she's that way, Ryouga. We got boarded by some pirates a year ago. We were
losing when the captain of them called her the B-word in the middle of the
fight. His crew, the fools, tried to protect him." Kawada gave a mirthless
laugh. "I've seen lots of horrible things in my lifetime, but that was the
worst. When Aki calmed down and saw what she had done and locked herself in
her cabin for a month."

Kawada shook his head. "They were cutthroats that deserved what happened to
them, but Aki still felt guilty. Since then there were three separate
instances of people calling her that. Each time we got her cat in time. But
now..." he trailed off. "She won't forgive herself if she kills the girl."

"Can't we stop her!" Ryouga asked. 

Kawada just shook his head.

The duo caught up to her just in time to see Frog with Kyoko at the stern,
having run out of ship with which to flee. That wasn't good. He knew for a
fact that Kyoko couldn't swim and that Aki could cut through the water like
a fish.

Brunt tried to stop her in a last ditch effort, digging his heels into the
deck once more. All that produced was a torn up deck as Aki now slowly made
her way towards Kyoko, who was too scared to even scream. 

"Sorry, girl," Frog apologized, then ran off.

Ryouga couldn't bring himself to hit Aki, so threw himself in front of
Kyoko. He began speaking softly to Aki as she approached. "I can't let you
hurt her, Aki. You'll have to go through me first."

If Aki heard him she did not respond. Instead she drew up in front of him.

"Get out of the way, Ryouga!" Brunt shouted as he continued to futilely
strain against her.

"No." Ryouga shook his head. "I can't hurt her or let her hurt Kyoko. I'll
stay right here. I don't think she'll hurt me."

Aki drew back her fist. 

"You just lost your bet! Move or she'll kill you and then kill the girl
anyway!"

Ryouga stood his ground.

"Ryouga-kun, move," Kyoko said softly from behind him. "I don't want you to
get hurt."

Ryouga continued staring straight at Aki. Then he saw it. A twitch in the
face. Aki was hesitating. "You don't want to hurt me," he said softly.
"We're friends. Family."

The fist wavered.

"Just let it go," Ryouga said softly.

"Get...out...of...the...way," Aki managed, obviously in great pain.

It was as he hoped. "No," Ryouga said firmly.

"Ryouga, move," Kyoko said once more.

"It...said...the...word. It...has...to...die."

"No," he repeated in the same tone of voice.

"Move."

Aki's fist wavered some more. Ryouga knew he was getting through. She was
going to stop in a second.

Then the fist descended straight for Ryouga's face. 

Kyoko screamed out in protest and tried moving Ryouga out of the way, but
he was too strong for her to overpower. Instead she watched, horrified, as
the fist came straight for her beloved's head...

...and stopped so close it appeared there was no space between the flesh of
the fist and Ryouga's face. Aki left it there for one second, then went
limp. Only Ryouga and Kawada saw the black image form for a second, then
disappear. Brunt held Aki up, more out of reflex than anything else. 

"I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes," Kawada
said in disbelief. Frog and Brunt mirrored their first mate.

"Give her to me," Ryouga said as he took Aki from Brunt. "I'll take her to
the infirmary. Don't worry about her, though. Don't ask me why, but I think
she'll be all right." And with that he went into the interior of the ship,
carrying Aki gently in his arms.

"Do you guys think she'll be all right?" Frog asked his comrades. 

"Yeah. Somehow, I think so," Kawada said. They didn't need a cat to stop
her. Maybe she was getting better.

"Oh no!" Kyoko cried out.

All three of the crewmen stared at Kyoko. "What is it?" 

"We let Ryouga-kun wander off by himself. We might not see him again for a
week."

Frog waved her off. "Don't worry, he's with....oh yeah. I see your point.
Maybe we'd better make sure they get to the infirmary all right." 

Everyone headed off to catch up to the wandering Hibiki.


It was two hours later when Ryouga sighed for the one hundredth time. How
could he possibly get lost on a ship? TWPOS was big, but it was still an
enclosed vessel. He should not have been lost that long.

"Put me down."

Ryouga looked at Aki. She had at last come around. "You all right?"

"Yes. And I'm not a little baby. Put me down."
 
"All right." He released her before she punched him in the face. He watched
her carefully as she stood up, looking none the worse for wear.

When she didn't say anything for a few moments he spoke up. "Are you going
to tell me what that was all about?"

She shrugged. "She called me the name and I tried to kill her. That was a
stupid risk you took. You're lucky I didn't pop your head off like a zit."

Watching Aki and her reactions was a lot easier than trying to do that with
Kyoko or Ukyou. She was hiding her fear. "I figured if you wouldn't hurt a
cat you wouldn't hurt me."

"Ryouga, you're not a cat and I've killed people before while like that."

Ryouga scratched his head. "Oh. I guess you're right. heh."

"Baka," she said softly. "Thanks."

"You're welcome. Do you know where we are?"

Aki looked around. "Somewhere on the ship. Have you seen anyone around?"

Ryouga shook his head. That was another odd thing. In two hours of
wandering he should have come across somebody, but almost from the instant
he went inside everything had been silent. If he hadn't felt the gentle
motion of the vessel under his feet he would have sworn he had wandered off
the ship without realizing it. "None of this looks familiar to me. I got
lost on this thing often enough that I thought at least some of it would
look familiar, but nothing does."

Aki looked around. "It might not have been here before."

Ryouga looked at her, confused. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Aki gave him a sober look. "I've wandered around this ship more often than
anyone else. I used to think I knew every inch of it. But as I wandered
around it I realized something. It's bigger on the inside than it is on the
outside. A lot bigger. And the insides aren't always the same."

Ryouga shook his head. "How can that be?" 

Aki shrugged. "Got me. Not even D'Amore understands anything about it. No
one does. We just crew on her."

"How big is it?"

Aki shrugged once more. "I don't know. I'm the only one that really
understands, I think. No one else even realizes just how big it is." She
thought for a moment. "Look. It's so big that there's even a hermit on the
ship that fancies himself a mad scientist. No one else knows about him. His
name's Alexander Luthorinski and he claims that the previous captain hired
him to try and figure out how some kind of funky set of second engines on
the ship work. If you ask me I think he's a stowaway. You think he'd choose
a better ship though."

"What? You mean no else noticed it?"

Aki nodded. "It's not really surprising. Most people only go where they
want to. No one tries to just walk around, or if they do they only do it
for a little while and then go back to where they wanted. I have heard
several people talk about how they ran into parts of the ship they didn't
even know were there, but no one ever looks into the matter. It's like no
one wants to face it. It's too weird to be believed.

"Now for us it's different. We can't help but go walk around to places
where we don't intend to go. So we get to see everything. Only every time I
do get lost, it seems like I end up somewhere new on here. Some things are
familiar, but other times they aren't. It's like it changes each time I go
around."

"Weird." Ryouga agreed. "So now that you're done trying to change the
subject, are you going to tell me what was up with that image I saw around
you and why you go crazy when someone calls you that word?"

Aki flushed with embarrassment. Her usually dense cousin had seen through
her. "Don't worry about it."

"Aki." 

"I said don't worry about it."

"Aki," he repeated. "You haven't told anyone anything about it. Don't you
think it's time?"

"No!"

"You nearly killed me today. I think I'm entitled to an explanation."

"Please don't do this to me," Aki pleaded.

Ordinarily Ryouga would have given in, but something told him it needed to
be done. "What was that black figure, Aki?"

She stared at him in disbelief. "You can see my stand?"

"Stand?"

It was her turn to look curiously at him. "You don't know what I'm talking
about, do you?"

He shook his head.

"If you had one you'd know it by now. I guess it must be one of those
perception things, like Kawada and the captain." She sighed. There was no
way Ryouga was going to let go now. If there was any one person she could
trust with the truth, it was Ryouga. "Swear to me you won't tell anyone
this, and I mean anyone."

Ryouga held up his hand and swore.  

"What you saw was a psychic projection called a stand. I'm one of those
rare individuals that was born with one. We're called stand users. It's
something that's a part of you, and when you hit puberty it manifests
itself. I used to think only other stand users could see them, but I'm
rapidly learning otherwise. D'Amore and Kawada can both see my stand, and
neither of them are stand users. Now you can too. I don't know why. Maybe
it's a martial arts thing. Different stands do different things. I know
because," she paused for a moment. "Because I ran into some a while back.

"It was when I was about ten or so. I got lost and wandered throughout the
world. Before I usually didn't wander too far out of Japan, but once I got
older I seemed to go farther and farther away. While I was wandering I met
him.

"Evil has a name, Ryouga. And his name is Dio.

"He was like nothing you've ever seen before. He makes you want to follow
him. He's just one of those kinds of people. It's like he projects himself
as a god, and at first you believe him. But once you get inside you realize
he's evil. He was a monster, and I found out the hard way, too late. He
discovered me through my stand. He had some method of finding stand users,
and bending them to his will.

"When he first found me I fell for that aura and he informed me of what I
was. I had no idea I was a stand user at the time. He said I was important
to him, and that I could belong to something greater. Somehow he brought
out my stand. I call it the Iron Tower. It's appropriate since my sign in
the tarot is The Tower. The first time I felt it, it was like a part of me
that I didn't even know existed. It was incredible. I'd always been strong,
but once I could summon my stand I became even stronger. That's its only
real ability: strength, but it has an abundance of it. Somehow I draw it
from the earth itself. When I'm at sea it's a lot weaker, but still
incredibly powerful.

"Once I understood what being a stand user meant he told me I could be
useful to him. That was when it all fell apart for me. I was too young, so
he had to change me. My stand is linked to the earth, but there were
natural limits to how much I could draw. He wanted those limits removed. He
had already recruited a small army of stand users to assist him. One of
them could affect another stand user's abilities. It was a slow arduous
process, but Dio saw to it I had plenty of time to be altered. The altering
was a painful and slow process, but eventually those limits were hammered
down and I could achieve the level of power Dio wanted. By that time I
refused to obey him. He said ordinarily he would kill someone like me for
defying him, but I was young enough to still be made to serve him. So he
had the stand user start to make me more compliant. Believe me, changing
the mind is a lot more difficult to do without permanently damaging it, and
a lot more painful too." Aki's voice became quiet. "He walked through my
mind and ripped out what was in the way, putting parts of him in their
place."

"It was slowly done over the days so they didn't make me into a vegetable.
And after the end of my sessions, I was thrown into a cell. While I would
lie there, slowly trying to put the broken fragments of my mind together, a
cat would visit me. It was a dweller in that hell hole I was left in.
Probably allowed to stay there because it would kill the rats. Anyway, that
cat would always curl up beside me and rest. I don't doubt it was only
because I was a warm blanket for him, but it didn't matter. It was the only
thing of comfort in that pit, and I latched onto it like a life preserver.
Thank kami for that cat. Somehow it ended up affecting the mental
programming they gave me. It was an inadvertent control which could ease me
out of my state.

"Dio tested me and I obeyed without question. If I had enough time to
gather my strength I could lift tons. Eventually the guy messing with my
mind decided to get cute and made one of the commands a kill command if
anyone called me a bitch. Pretty funny, huh? He thought so, at least. He
made certain that command was deeply rooted in. He really liked it, the
sick bastard. But then something wonderful happened. Dio got killed at the
hands of a rival. In the ensuing chaos I escaped, taking that cat with me.
Over time all of the alterations faded except for the b-word command, and I
could shake out of that if I had my cat with me. I got worried when it died
on me, but I got another and it worked the same. Since then I hooked up
with this ship and put everything behind me. All the crew knows is not to
call me that, and even if they do Kawada or someone knows to grab my cat
and bring me out of it. I had to tell them that much. I didn't want to hurt
anyone.

"All that worked was a cat, until now, though. You brought me out of it. I
guess maybe the command is finally starting to fade, or maybe blood runs
deep enough. I'm not sure if it would work a second time, though, so I
wouldn't be too eager to try that again if I was you.

"And as for my stand, I won't willingly use it anymore. There's too many
nightmares connected to it. I'd sooner die than use it, and there have been
a lot of instances where that could have happened. Never again.

"So now you know the truth. You're the only one, Ryouga."

Ryouga nodded his head. He had been in the presence of gods before. The
idea of stand users related to him was easy to accept. "Thanks for telling
me. If there's any way I can help all you have to do is ask."

"Thanks." Aki laughed, finally wiping away the worst of what happened that
day. Purging herself of those awful memories helped her, somehow. Who knew?
Maybe in the upcoming days, she'd finally be able to break out of the
brainwashing that was so deeply ingrained in her psyche. Until then she
figured she would have to concentrate on getting another cat. Things had
been cut too close that time.

"Let's find our way out of here," Ryouga finally said. The two set off in
an attempt to find a way out of the hold of the ship.


Perfume and her hunt pack began to settle in their quarters on the section
of the ship, the ones next to the lingerie shop. On the bright side the
captain let them all board for next to nothing. On the downside he kept
hitting on Perfume every time she talked to him and kept insisting he would
help her pick out something 'sexy' from the store. He claimed he would even
give her a personal discount if she would accompany him to dinner, the pig.
Perfume absolutely despised those would-be suave cretins that thought every
woman should jump into the sack with them. Too bad her feelings weren't
shared by the majority of her pack, many of whom seemed smitten by the
captain's charms. At least the gullible Sash wasn't paying him any heed.
She was too heartbroken over leaving her husband behind. Sash was counting
on returning after the current mess at home was over.

The leader of the hunt pack was trying to come up with some way to protect
Shampoo, and failing miserably, while placing some things in her closet.
She was only halfway done when one of her fellow warriors decided to pay a
visit.

"<Perfume. I'm here to help,>" Shelf's voice musically chimed in from the
doorway. Not waiting for an answer, the girl simply bounced in and stopped
next to Perfume.

The low groan that emanated from Perfume would have made a less determined
person give up on their scheme. However, when it came to romance, Shelf was
persistent to the point of being able to watch paint dry before she would
give up on a target. 

The pink-haired Amazon examined her 'sister' more closely. Her top was
undone almost to the point that she was falling out. The girl didn't have a
shred of decency. "<Would you just go away?>" Perfume groaned.

"<Oh don't be that way. Let me help.>" Without waiting for an answer she
grabbed a pack and proceeded to place it in the closet. She then pretended
to trip, knocking Perfume and herself to the ground and making certain to
ram her cleavage into the prone girl's face. 

"<Geff off obe me!>" Perfume muffled voice sounded through the breasts
jammed into her. 

"<Why play coy with me?>" Shelf said in as seductive a tone as possible.
"<I've seen those sidelong glances you give me when you think people aren't
looking.>"

Perfume turned her face away from the cleavage so she wasn't suffocating.
"<What the hell are you talking about?!>"

"<You know what I mean. We both want it.>"

It was at that moment Cabinet and several other Amazons decided to visit.
"<Perfume. I wanted to ask...>" she trailed off at the scene before her.
"<Never mind. We'll give you two the privacy you need.>"

Perfume went limp for a moment as she heard Cabinet leave the room. She
then took as deep a breath as she could while being semi-smothered and
spoke once again. "<You are going to pay for this.>"

"<Does that mean it's time for foreplay?>" Shelf asked. 

"<Depends on your definition of foreplay.>" Her hands gently made their way
up Shelf's breasts.

"<That's more like it,>" Shelf cooed.

*TWIST*

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"


D'Amore heard the cry and began banging his head on one of the consoles on
the bridge. It had already started. People were having sex and he wasn't
one of them. "Why me?" he sobbed as continued banging his head.


"Why do we have to share a room?" Mousse complained as he looked the cabin
over. It didn't make any sense. Everyone else got their own room. And why
did theirs have a heart shaped bed with pink covers on it?

"I haven't the faintest idea, Mousse-sama." The ten thousand yen for a
honeymoon suite Kodachi slipped the crewman might have had something to do
with it, but why should she bother Mousse with trivial details? There were
other things on her mind. "Mousse, we need to have a little talk."

"About what?" He was examining the room as he talked. Surprisingly there
was a working refrigerator in the room with all sorts of 'performance
enhancers' and endurance drinks. What kind of person kept things like that
in their cabin?

"About your foolish gestures during the fight." She pulled out a pair of
thick insulated gloves and put them on.

He knew this was going to happen. "I've told you before, I will never let
anyone harm Shampoo," he said confidently, then softly added. "Even if she
loves someone else," That was only now settling in. As hard as he tried to
deny it in the past, he just couldn't this time. Not with the look he had
seen in her eyes. It was there that the pure love he had craved like a drug
was, and it had not been directed towards him. Oh, what cruel fates made
his purple-haired goddess fall in love with such an unworthy fool like
Saotome.

"We are going back to your people. You know what will happen when her curse
is revealed, and it will end up being shown."

"Is that a threat?"

"No," Kodachi said as a matter of fact. "Not a day goes by in which she
doesn't change. There's no reason to believe China will be different.
Knowing her luck, she'll change on the ship and all of her fellow people
will discover the truth." She continued fishing in her leotard for
something.

"Then I'll protect her from them! I'll protect her from everyone! In fact,
I'll go protect her right now! She might be in danger!" Mousse turned to
go.

"Ah here it is!" She pulled out a large ball covered with some kind of gray
substance. "Catch!" She tossed the ball to him

"What is it?" he asked as he caught the sphere out of reflex. A tingling
sensation shot up his arm where his flesh made contact with the ball. In
less then three seconds he was completely paralyzed.

"A new contact paralytic I wanted to test out. It's nice to see it does
work, but in my unthinking haste I seem to have benumbed you." Kodachi said
calmly as she placed the ball back in her leotard, then removed the gloves.

She picked him up and placed him on the bed, then made herself comfortable
as she sat next to him. "Why don't we have a discussion of exactly why you
are behaving irrationally and why I will not allow you to recklessly throw
your life away? I'm confident you'll see things my way, even if you must
remain like this for the rest of the voyage."

Mousse could do nothing more than listen as she launched into her tirade.


In another cabin on the ship, Cologne sat in silence. Sparrow had finished
giving her the orders that were for the matriarch's ears only. The Musk had
the audacity to claim Mount Phoenix as their own and specifically warned
the Amazons away from it. Why was it so important to Herb? What secrets
were there that he felt the need to place an army outside it to keep others
out? 

There were many things to ponder for the upcoming days, and for perhaps the
first time in her life she was out of ideas. Shampoo was almost surely
going to be brought before the council and explanations were going to have
to be given as to what she had been doing. And given the Jusenkyou curses,
there was no way she could avoid giving away the secret. The elder had her
doubts about Shampoo being able to remain on the ship and not somehow
tipping off the members of the hunt pack as to the Nanniichuan problem. 

Flight was a temporary solution at best, and one that would ensure she
could never go back home, regardless of a cure. And the problem would be
compounded by the shame brought upon the family should Shampoo flee once
more. As the leader of her clan it was Cologne's responsibility to look
after the welfare of all of its members, which went beyond Shampoo and any
difficulties she had. 

It was the worst situation she had ever been in. Cologne had been lying to
the council in her omission of the curse, and if they ever found out she
would be expelled immediately and her entire clan reduced to a lowly
status. Leaders that employed duplicity to the tribe were never forgiven.
There had been several that had been caught doing such things in the past,
and the price was always steep. However, it had been worth the risk. It had
all been for Shampoo's benefit, but now the end was in sight.

Cologne had no doubt Shampoo would remain silent about the matriarch's
knowledge of the curse. Commitment to family still ran strongly through her
veins, but there was still the disgrace of being brought before her people
with the curse and forced to kill herself. Cologne could think of no way to
get to Jusenkyou now; the orders had been explicit in going directly home.
Any deviation from them would be cause for great suspicion. And even then
there was still very little guarantee that a cure could still be obtained.
As near as Cologne could tell, nothing about Shampoo had changed to make
her believe that a cure was any more possible than when Mousse had brought
the Nyanniichuan back from China and Shampoo used it on Perfume. Fate
worked in strange ways.

Then there was the other side problem of home, which she had barely thought
about. What were the Musk up to? The fools were risking bringing down the
government on all of their heads. The people of the area kept to themselves
and were left alone, just so long as they didn't cause trouble. There was a
great deal of power concentrated in that one spot in China, and the
government was reluctant to stir up so much trouble for so little an area.
To the rulers in Beijing, the potential losses far outweighed the gains.
But if Herb continued to make waves, those losses might end up being
acceptable for maintaining the peace of the area, and that would doom
everyone. Herb had to be stopped before he caused irreparable damage.

Cologne shifted her thoughts to the more current problems at hand. Silk had
been only too happy to get this ship. She was up to something, something
that just might help Shampoo. The elder could only pray that whatever it
was would be successful. And as to the ship itself, the ghost sweeper had
been right. Cologne was far from being as sensitive in magic as someone
like Minami, but even she could feel the magic coming from the ship. The
whole vessel was full of the stuff. It was just a miracle Happosai hadn't
jumped on board beforehand. He was instinctively drawn to magic like a moth
to a flame. And with so many women on board, as well as a lingerie shop,
well, Cologne thanked all of her luck they set off when they did.

That was when the screams started from outside. Cologne looked up at the
door only to have it burst inward.

"I should have known," she sighed.

"<ELDER!!!>" So Fu screamed. "<It's attached to my breasts and I can't get
it off!>"

Happosai turned from his perch from between So Fu's breasts and looked at
Cologne. "Hi there! Isn't this great! It's a boatload full of beautiful
women with a bunch of lingerie. No one can escape now. It's just us and the
open seas. I should have come up with something like this years ago.
HAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Cologne just sighed about how some things never changed and swung at
Happosai. He barely managed to tear himself out of the cleavage in time.
"I'll come back for you later, you cute little thing," he told So fu. "I'm
just going to visit some of your Amazon sisters and let them share the
wealth! Woohoo!" And with that he bounded off, groping the next woman he
came upon.

"<What was that thing?!>" So Fu gasped out.

"<A terrible demon of perversion from the deepest pits of hell. If you kill
it, your name will go down in the annals of our history as one of the
greatest warriors of our time.>" 

"<I would do that anyway for what it did to me. All I need to do is round
up some of my sisters and we'll commence a search. It won't leave the ship
alive!>"

"<Good luck,>" Cologne managed to say with a straight face. Happosai was
going to be kept busy for a while. 


Aki and Ryouga finally made their way back to the upper portions of the
ship when a Happosai-glomped Amazon ran past the duo, screaming at the top
of her lungs.

"What was that?" Aki asked in shock.

Ryouga explained exactly what Happosai was.

"So there are two perverts on the ship now. I wonder if the captain'll get
defensive about having another one encroaching on his territory?" Further
thoughts were cut off as a little red bundle of perversion glomped itself
to Aki's chest.

"Say honey, you should start wearing a bra. Wouldn't want the guys to think
you're brazen, would you? You feel like a b-cup." He placed one hand in his
gi. "Here you go!" He pulled a lacy black bra out and offered it to Aki.

"LET GO OF MY-" Ryouga managed to get out before he was cut off.

Aki held a hand up before Ryouga. "I'll take care of this." She looked down
at the creature in its perch, then put on a cutesy expression that would
have put Azusa to shame, yet somehow managed to scare Ryouga at the same
time. That sort of look did not belong on his cousin's features.

"You're such a cute little thing." She pinched one of Happosai's cheeks,
then wrapped her arms around and began hugging him.

"Ahhh!" Happosai made himself more snug in his perch. "It's not often a
girl respects her elder like you do. It's so refre-" he stopped as he
suddenly felt his spine become compressed with incredible pressure.

"This is the way I deal with perverts that go grabbing where they don't
belong." Aki's cute expression disappeared as her more normal features
returned. "I wonder how long it'll be before we hear your vertebrae snap."

"This is a little tight, dear. Would you mind loosening up a little?"
Happosai tried squirming out of her grasp, but to no avail.

"I like you just where you are," she gave him a wicked grin as she
increased the pressure. 

"Sorry, I have...to go...visit some other...ladies," he gasped out.
"No...offense." He managed to reach into his gi and drew out a
happodaikarin.

"What's th-"

*BOOM*

A singe-covered Aki stood watching Happosai, who had somehow avoided the
effects of the blast, bounce away. "The little bugger's dead!"

"I'm with you!" Ryouga raised his fist to the skies. "No one molests
members of my family and gets away with it! HAPPOSAI! PREPARE TO DIE!!!" 

Both members of the Hibiki clan set off on their mission of destruction.


Happosai looked back, overjoyed at the pursuit. "I just wish Ranma were
among them," he sighed. The absence of his favorite semi-pupil (and pair of
breasts) couldn't bring down his mood as he continued to bounce merrily
along.


Genma moved another piece. "There's nothing like the smell of the open sea,
is there, Tendo?"

"Absolutely," Soun agreed as he contemplated the board. The duo were
playing shogi on their traveling board, which Genma was wise enough to
bring to the wedding, along with their white and brown gis that both had
switched into. Currently they were playing on the foredeck while enjoying
the beautiful weather and listening to the seagulls cry out as the waves
broke across the ship.

Soun paused in his thoughts to look over Genma's shoulder. "Is that a
blue-billed seagull?"

Genma turned around to look at the bird. "No. I'm pretty sure that's a
red-footed one."

Soun switched the pieces to a more favorable position while Genma's back
was to him. "My mistake."

"Here's some tea, Father." Kasumi poured some for both him and Genma.

"Thank you, Kasumi." Both men said as she went back to her place next to
them.

"How can you two be so calm?" Nodoka asked in frustration. "Ranma and
Akane's wedding was just ruined."

"We're used to things not working out," Soun said as Genma contemplated his
next move. "You can't let it get you down."

"It'll be all right in the end, dear," Genma assured her, then pointed over
Soun's shoulder. "I think that's a blue-billed sea gull."

Soun turned to look, allowing Genma to move the pieces. "I do believe
you're right, Saotome. You don't see those very often." He turned back to
the board.

"I appreciate Ranma's desire to help his friends, it speaks a lot about his
character, but we should still be doing something to make certain Ranma
keeps his responsibilities in order. Those two will get married!"

"Of course, dear," Genma said finally moving a piece. "Tendo and I are
coming up with something now."

"All the two of you are doing is lazing around and cheating at shogi."

Soun and Genma stared with amused grins at Nodoka, who couldn't help making
a comparison to the two of them appearing as though they were cats that had
just swallowed the canary.

"Now that's where you're wrong, Mrs. Saotome," Soun said.

"We're going to be family," Nodoka corrected. "Please call me Nodoka."

"Right, Nodoka. You see, it is at this shogi board that Saotome and I come
up with our best plans."

Genma nodded. "It was over shogi that we decided to unite our families." 

"I thought you were out drinking that night," Nodoka reminded him.

"Yes. We were out drinking and playing shogi. We also came up with our plan
to seal up the master over one such game as well."

"Too true," Soun agreed. "And we came up with that plan to deal with that
demoness, Atsuko." Soun paused. "All right, maybe that wasn't one of our
better plans, but most of them are good."

"Almost all of the ones we've come up with to bring Ranma and Akane closer
together have come from our collaborations over this board," Genma stated
proudly. "And Soun and I have already come up with some basic ideas on how
to get the two of them married."

"We're on a ship," Nodoka reminded him. 

"And since we're on the open seas, the captain can marry couples," Soun
said happily. "All we need to do is get the two of them together with the
captain around and instant marriage."

Nodoka nodded her head approvingly. "Not bad. I apologize for
underestimating the two of you."

Both Genma and Soun smiled at the compliment.

"We just needed a change of scenery to get our creative juices flowing
again. A vacation away from Nerima is prefect, eh, Tendo?"

"Too true, Saotome. Too true." 

It was at that moment Happosai bounced around them with a bag full of
ladies underwear crying out "What a haul! What a haul!" He was then
followed by Ryouga, Aki, over half the hunt pack, and Minami, who was still
vowing his death for groping her those months ago.

Genma watched the chase move away from their part of the ship. "On the
other hand, no matter how far you go, you can never quite seem to get
away."

"Too true, Saotome. Too true."


"There's a pervert on the foredeck!" a crewmen shouted from the bridge.

"Impossible," second helmsman Shelby stated. "The captain's right next to
me."

D'Amore struck him on the top of the head, knocking him onto the floor.
"Where is the man who would dare defile women on this ship?"

The recovered Shelby held a mirror in front of the captain's face. D'Amore
admired himself in it for a second, moving a single lock of hair back into
its proper place, before grabbing it and smashing it over Shelby's head,
knocking him down once more. 

"He just ran back inside of the ship, sir," the crewman who had spotted
Happosai earlier stated.

"How dare he molest women on my ship!" D'Amore cried out in overly
melodramatic rage.

"Exactly, sir," Shelby barely managed to get out as he staggered to his
feet. "That's your job."

D'Amore backhanded him away in disgust, leaving him in a heap on the floor.
"Fool! If you were not my mother's brother's cousin's nephew's step-son's
roommate's former plumber, I would make you walk the plank for such
disrespect. As it is I shall let you off with this warning." He picked the
beaten Shelby up and threw him against the bulkhead, leaving him in a heap
once more, then drew his sword and went off to hunt Happosais.

One of the other crewmen examined Shelby's crumpled form. "You really ought
to learn to keep you mouth shut. You're not Kawada, you know."

"It's not my fault I'm cursed to speak whatever's on my mind," Shelby
groaned from the floor.


Ukyou and Ai watched the others run around the ship in pursuit of Happosai.
He only managed the briefest of gropes on both girls before fleeing, so
they chose to let the offense pass and let the others continue chasing him.

"Ukyou, why are we going to China?"

Ukyou had a feeling this was coming. Now the question was how much of the
truth Ai should be told. "Shampoo is in trouble."

"You're talking about Shampoo Saotome, aren't you?" Ai asked.

Ukyou shifted her feet. "Well," she let out reluctantly, "sort of."

"Funny, I would think that if it involved the Chinese, our redheaded
Shampoo would be  the one concerned, unless there's something going on I
don't know about."

Ukyou began to fidget more. "There is."

Ai softened a bit, sensing Ukyou's discomfort. "Can you tell me or are you
sworn to secrecy?"

"It's not the sort of thing I'm supposed to talk about."

"Then don't. I trust you implicitly."

The way Ai said that made Ukyou's decision easier. "No. You have a right to
know. You can't tell anyone about this, because Shampoo may end up being
put to death. Here's what's really going on..."

Ai listened with only the slightest hint of disbelief. "I had no idea.
Sex-changing water. How bizarre."

"I'm just glad I was never there." Ukyou sighed with relief. "I probably
would have ended up falling in the Spring of Drowned Dog or something."

"No. I picture you more as a wolf," Ai said with a smile. "But you'd be the
best looking wolf around." She began petting Ukyou's head, barely
restraining her laughter.

"Spring of Drowned Peacock for you," Ukyou stated. "The way you primp
yourself all the time."

Ai gave a look of mock indignity at the suggestion. "I was thinking of
something more along the lines of Spring of Drowned Mongoose. Something
quick and smart."

"Maybe," Ukyou admitted. 

They were silent for a few moments before Ai spoke up. "Are you going to
risk your life for her?"

Ukyou's shoulders slumped. "She's a friend. A good one, I guess. It's hard
to believe with how much I hated her at first. But I don't know. I came to
help keep Ranchan out of trouble. I don't know how much I'm willing to risk
for Shampoo."

"I just want to know what to expect," Ai said. "I like knowing what the
stakes are."

"You don't have to do this. It doesn't concern you."

Ukyou received a sharp blow to the ribs. "If it concerns you, it concerns
me. Got it?" Ai said with more than a hint of anger in her voice.

Ukyou knew better than to start an argument she wasn't going to win. "All
right. When I figure it out I'll let you know."

"That's better," Ai said, placated.

They looked towards the ocean as the sun set on the horizon. Ai studied
Ukyou's features as the dying embers of crimson highlighted her
chestnut-colored hair. Even as Ai admired the way the light cast perfect
shadows in just the right places upon Ukyou's features, she found herself
wishing she had a camera to capture the moment.

"What is it?" Ukyou asked as she realized how intently Ai was staring.

Ai was suddenly struck by a feeling of sadness as the sun set too far and
that one moment of perfection was lost, most likely for all time. "I just
wish I had enough artistic talent to capture how you appeared just now. You
have no idea of how beautiful you really are."

Ukyou smiled for a moment. "Thanks. You're the only person that's ever said
anything like that to me."

"You are a sandalwood-eyed beauty who deserves to have armies falling
before you so that they may worship the ground you walk on."

"Watch it," Ukyou warned. "You're beginning to sound like Kunou."

"Maybe you bring out the Kunou in me."

Ukyou stared at her for a moment, then burst out deep laughter.

"What is it?" Ai asked in bewilderment.

"I...I...HAHAHA!!!" Ukyou tried to compose herself as the tears began
falling from her eyes. "I just pictured a six inch version of HAHAHA Kunou
sitting on your shoulder, shouting out to you about how to describe the
beauty of the 'spatula wielding goddess.' HAHAHAHA!!!" Ukyou fell over
laughing.

Ai stood there for a moment, pictured what Ukyou said, then doubled over
laughing as well.


Silk stood apart from all the others, watching the sun set; a smile on her
face. Part of what had happened was her fault in being late, and it just
might end up costing Shampoo everything. But at least one of her plans had
worked. The sun was setting in the west, which was off to left side of the
ship and towards the back. 

TWPOS was staying true to form. Which meant Shampoo now had time. The only
question was how much.


xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Yes. The reference to Ukyou falling in Spring of Drowned Wolf was inspired
from Wade Tritschler's 'A Scary Thought.'

Special Thanks to: 

Ryan Anderson
Jim Robert Bader
Bloodblade
Gary Kleppe
Jason Liao
Lord Talon
Miashara
Dr. Wade Tritschler