This is the first part of a ten-part series dealing with... well, guess
who?  When was the last time you saw a Ranma 1/2 fic with the word
"rose" in in that didn't have to do with Kodachi?  :)

It's a serious story dealing with honor, mental illness, and love.  I'd
be very interested in anything you'd have to say about the story, good
or bad.

--
-Richard
sterman@sprynet.com

|-------------------------------------------------------|
| All of my fanfics can be found on my fanfic web page: |
| http://home.sprynet.com/sprynet/sterman/fanfic.htm    |
|-------------------------------------------------------|


Ryoga and Ranma stared at each other numbly.  They each had a reason to
be absolutely horrified.

Ryoga reacted first.  His reaction was not helpful.  "Look at you!  A
boy in girl's tights!  Ha!"

Ranma snapped back.  "Look at *you*!  A boy totally naked!  Ha HA!"

It didn't make him feel any better.  In a second, maybe two, the steam
from the kettle would clear away and everyone in the gymnasium would
know his secret.  Worse, they'd see him in a leotard.  Ryoga was right -
Ranma did *not* want people to see him that way.

A spray of cold water hit them.  He looked over to see Akane standing
with a fire hose.  Ranma blew out a relieved breath as he and Ryoga
changed.  One disaster averted.

Ranma looked down to realize that another was about to happen.  The
force of the water's blast was carrying her out of the ring - and to
defeat.  She tried to swim against the force of the water, but it was no
good.

She fell to the ground outside the ring, Ryoga in pig form landing on
top of her.  Her mind shut down, with one thought ringing through her
head: she'd lost.

The water stopped.  Akane came running up to Ranma, her face a picture
of shock and horror.  "Oh Ranma, I'm sorry, I didn't mean - "

"Worry not, fair Akane."  Kuno came striding up, his face supremely
regal.  "This is all for the best.  For now that fiend Saotome has no
claim over you, and we two are free to pursue our love unfettered by the
spurious engagement forced upon you."

The look of horror on Akane's face deepened.  Ranma stared at her, and
slowly began to make some connections.  Akane had bet her engagement on
the outcome of the match.  Ranma had lost.  Which meant that...

A surreal laugh interrupted Ranma's thoughts.  "A worthy opponent you
are, little one.  Never have I been so challenged.  But the battle is
mine - and with it, the right to wed Ranma-sama!"

Kodachi laughed and laughed, and Ranma felt her world come crashing down
around her in response.

***


Why should poor beauty indirectly seek
Roses of shadow, since his rose is true?
Why should he live, now Nature bankrupt is,
Beggar'd of blood to blush through lively veins?
O, him she stores, to show what wealth she had
In days long since, before these last so bad.

   excerpt from Sonnet LXVII
   by William Shakespeare


ROSES OF SHADOW

By Richard Lawson

Part One:  These Last So Bad


Ranma walked down the street in a daze.  His head was swimming and his
ears were ringing.  He wanted to say it was because he hadn't slept in
two days.  But he knew.  It was a truth that was hovering around him.
He had lost.  The words "RANMA LOST" were hovering over him in large
neon letters, with an arrow pointing at his head.  He just knew they
were there, knew that other people could see them and would laugh at him
as soon as they read them.

He approached the Tendo home.  He needed to sleep, and put this behind
him, and get on with his life.  Maybe tomorrow he'd be able to think
clearly.  Hell, he thought to himself, maybe there was something to be
learned in all of this.  There was a lesson in here somewhere.  The
School said so; you learned from *everything* that happened to you.

Ranma wasn't in the mood for lessons right now.

He approached the front gate, bone-weary.  He wondered if he should go
talk to Akane.  She'd gone on ahead home while Ranma had changed out of
his clothes and into another body.  She'd seemed as depressed as he was,
even a little hysterical.  He'd need to straighten some stuff out with
her.  If he could figure out what he was supposed to straighten out.  He
was just so tired.

He opened the gate, walked up to the front door, and paused.  The door
was wide open, and he could hear a familiar sound.  Akane, screaming at
someone.  He'd heard her angry before.  Lots of times.  But this time,
there was a hint of desperation that worried him.

Ranma hurried down the hallway.  Akane was standing in front of his
room, being held by Nabiki as she screamed at someone inside.  "Get
out!  You don't belong here, you've done enough damage, get OUT!"  She
easily shrugged off Nabiki's hold, but Nabiki merely held on to her
again before she could move into the room.

Ranma came up and put a hand on Akane's shoulder.  She whirled and
looked up at him, and her eyes pleaded with him.  For what, he didn't
know.

"Ranma-sama!  You're just in time."  Ranma turned to see Kodachi in his
room, packing his few belongings.  She was dressed in a simple white
shirt and a long black skirt.  Her eyes glittered as she looked at
Ranma.  "Here."  She finished stuffing the last few items into his
backpack, lifted it, and tossed it in his direction.

He caught it absently, staring at her.  "What are you doing?"

She laughed a pretty little laugh that wasn't quite her full-blown
maniacal laugh.  "Why, Ranma-sama, you are moving into the Kuno
mansion.  Akane has agreed to give you up, so now you belong to me."

Ranma threw his backpack to the ground.  "I belong to no one."

"That's right!"  A bit of triumph colored Akane's shouting.  "You can't
have him.  He's -" She broke off suddenly.

"He's what, Tendo?"  Kodachi spoke derisively.  "Your fiancee?"

Akane's face turned a peculiar shade of red - from embarrassment or
frustration, Ranma couldn't tell.

Kodachi was examining Akane closely.  Slowly, she smiled.  "You can't
say it, can you?  Go ahead, try.  I'll give him back to you if you can
call him your fiancee."

Akane just gaped at her, shocked speechless.  Ranma stared at her,
waiting for her to say something.

"As I thought."  Kodachi sniffed.  "You never really wanted him anyway.
That's why you bet your engagement on the match.  It never really meant
anything to you, did it?"

As Ranma watched, Akane's face mottled in rage.  Yet she still didn't
speak.  Ranma for some reason found her lips fascinating, wondering if
they would begin to form words.  They stayed slightly apart as Akane
breathed heavily.

"Poor dear."  Kodachi's voice was openly mocking.  Ranma turned to look
at her.  She had a wide smile on her face.  She was enjoying this
immensely, he realized.  "Forced into an engagement against your will.
You should thank me, Tendo.  I have relieved you of the awful burden of
being forced to marry Ranma-sama."

"What is this?"  Soun came up, his expression angry.  Ranma wondered
where he'd been before.  Probably hiding, Ranma thought with disgust;
the man was weak-willed and ran away from conflicts whenever possible.
The talk of marriage seemed to have flushed him out.  "Akane and Ranma
are to wed.  That is the solemn oath of the Tendo and Saotome clans."

"Ah, but your daughter has repudiated her claim."  Kodachi's voice was
ingratiating, her manner the one of a teacher patiently explaining to a
slow student.  "And besides, Ranma-sama's father has agreed to break the
engagement oath and instead allow him to marry me."

Soun straightened slightly, looking morally offended.  "Saotome-kun is a
man of honor.  He would never -"

"But he has."  She reached into the pocket of her skirt and pulled out
an envelope.  "I spoke with him after the match.  He agreed and signed
this letter as proof.  I think you'll find it confirms everything I've
just said."  She handed the letter to Soun.

Soun opened it and read it.  As he did, his face grew darker.

Akane glared at Kodachi again, finally regaining her voice.  "He never
signed that!  It's a forgery."

"I recognize the handwriting."  Soun's voice was soft and low.  And
dangerous.  "That is his signature."

"Then he was forced to sign it."  Akane grit her teeth.  "A potion,
something she made him drink, she hypnotized him, *something*!"

"My, my, you place more faith in my drugs than I do.  It was much
simpler than that.  All I did was offer him one million yen if he would
agree to those terms.  He accepted with alacrity."  Kodachi raised her
chin and crossed her arms, the picture of one who has delivered the
final, conclusive argument in a debate.

Ranma felt his heart sink into his stomach.  He knew, without a doubt,
that Kodachi was telling the truth.  Genma had done some pretty rotten
things during the course of their training.  Stealing food, clothing,
even money once in a while.  He'd use every ruse he could think of.
Often, Ranma had played the poor, miserable child, his clothes and face
dirty.  People would often take him and his father in, and Genma would
milk them for everything he could before moving on.  His father had
often spoken of what he would do when he got his hands on some real
money.

Evidently, he'd decided to finally live the high life again.  At Ranma's
expense.

Soun began to tremble.  He whirled on Ranma, his voice shaking with his
body.  "Get out of this house.  Tell that low-life oath-breaking
honorless father of yours that if I ever see him again, I'll beat him
within an inch of his life.  The Saotome family is no longer welcome in
this house."  He began to advance on Ranma, and Ranma stepped backwards
down the hallway, quite honestly frightened by Soun's demeanor.  "Leave
us right now."

Ranma walked backwards through the still-open front door and down the
path.  Soun stopped at the doorway, the letter crumpled in his hand.

Akane came up behind him and touched him on the arm.  "Father..."

"And STAY AWAY FROM MY DAUGHTER!"  Soun stepped backwards into the
house, and slammed the door.  The last thing Ranma saw inside the Tendo
home was Akane's shocked face, with a tear just beginning to fall from
one eye.

"Well, that went better than I had hoped."  Kodachi's voice made him
jump.  He whirled to see her standing behind him, at the front gate.  He
wondered idly how she'd gotten there.  "Now, let's go home."

Ranma locked his jaw.  "I ain't going nowhere with you, Kodachi."

"Oh, *please*, Ranma-sama."  She tsked in irritation.  "Where else will
you stay?  Part of the agreement your father made was that you would
live in the Kuno mansion until our marriage."

Ranma blinked.  "What?"

"In fact, he insisted on it.  Which is just as well, considering what
just happened."  She raised her eyebrows.  "Are you going to abide by
the agreement your father made?  Does the honor of the Saotome family
mean so little?"

Ranma stared at her while his brain locked up.  Too much had happened in
the past couple of days.  Akane.  Ryoga.  Kodachi.  Akane.  Soun.  And,
finally, Kodachi again.  All without any sleep, thanks to Ryoga.  He
didn't know what to do, didn't know how to act.  Didn't know what to
feel.

The words she had just spoken rang through his head.  The honor of the
Saotome family.  Genma had sold his honor for a few yen.  How could such
a thing be binding on Ranma?  Just because someone came up out of the
blue and said he was honor-bound to marry them, didn't make it true.

And yet, where else would he go?  He really didn't look forward to
sleeping in a tent.  He had school tomorrow.  Best, for now, to go along
with Kodachi.  He needed a warm place to sleep tonight.  Tomorrow he
could think clearly, and then he could decide where to go.

And perhaps then he could argue with the voice that was telling him that
going with Kodachi was the only honorable thing to do.

He sighed and put on his backpack.  "All right, let's get the hell out
of here."

Something flickered across Kodachi's face, there and gone before he
could fully register it.  If he wasn't so tired, he'd think she'd been
surprised.  "This way," she said quietly.

Ranma followed her, his head ringing more than it had before.  Damn,
life was getting awfully complicated.  Again.  Like it had almost every
day since that trip to China.

This time, however, it was taking an almost sinister turn.  And Ranma
feared what horrible things might be in store for him next.

---

Ranma woke slowly.  Something was wrong, he knew that.  What, he didn't
know.

He sat bolt upright all at once.  He looked at the unfamiliar
surroundings.  He was in a bed.  He hadn't slept in an
honest-to-goodness bed in years.  And not just any bed.  This one was
big and luxurious, a four-poster affair with red silk curtains and
bright blue sheets.

The room was as sumptuous as the bed.  A desk in one corner, a large
bureau, big, comfortable chairs at various strategic locations.
Sunlight streamed through a large window.  Outside he could see trees.

Ranma's heart sank as it all came back to him.  Losing the match.
Losing Akane.  Coming to the Kuno mansion, more asleep than awake.  A
mumbled greeting to Kuno, being led up some stairs and into a room,
crawling into the bed with no more thought than that he desperately
needed sleep.

Oh my, was *this* going to be a difficult day.

Ranma slowly got out of bed.  He didn't see his backpack anywhere.  He
walked over to the chest of drawers.  He found his clothes inside.
They'd obviously been cleaned and folded neatly.  He took out a set and
considered the three doors in the room.  He opened one at random and
found that it led to a large closet, currently empty.  The next door
revealed a small, complete bathroom.

Ranma washed himself.  He avoided cold water when he did so, for some
reason uncomfortable with changing himself while he was here.  He
dressed and grabbed his bookbag, lying neatly in the center of the
desk.  He wondered if someone had done his homework for him.  That was
probably too much to ask for.

He opened the remaining door, and entered a long, wide hallway.  The
carpet here was deep and rich.  Ranma didn't like it.

He made his way down the stairs.  At the landing he looked around
again.  Damn, what a big place this was.  He felt quite uncomfortable.
He supposed he was a... a whatchamacallit.  Wolverine?  Spartan, that
was it.  What the hell good was all this stuff, anyway?  He liked a
simple house.  He liked a simple life.

Sighing, he made his way down the stairs.  His nose led him down another
hallway and into a dining room three times the size of the Tendo one.

Kuno was just wiping his mouth.  He put stood up, nodded his head in
greeting, and left without a word.  Ranma noted that he had left most of
his breakfast untouched.

He also noticed another place at the table, with a full breakfast
waiting.  He assumed it was his, and sat down at it.  He picked up some
chopsticks and took a tentative bite.  It was surprisingly good.  Ranma
didn't know, exactly, why he was surprised.  After a few weeks of
Kasumi's food, he supposed he'd been worried that anything else would
seem second-rate.

He dug in with gusto; he was quite hungry.  All of the food was good, if
flavored a little strangely.  He was just finishing up when Kodachi
appeared through another door.

She was wearing her gymnastic tights and an apron.  A hairnet covered
her hair.  She smiled as she saw him.  "Good morning, Ranma-sama."  Her
voice was a little distant.  She looked down at his breakfast, and
raised an eyebrow in surprise.  "You ate everything?"

"Uh, yeah.  It was good."

"Oh."  She turned and went back out the door she'd come in, which he
guessed lead to a kitchen.  He wondered if she had been the one to
prepare breakfast.  Come to think of it, he hadn't seen a servant yet.

He finished up the last of the food and stood up.  He pondered his next
move.  He wanted to work out, but the old man wasn't here.  Ranma
flinched; thoughts of his father were a little painful right now.  Genma
had taken betrayal to a new level.

His morose thoughts were interrupted by the return of Kodachi.  She was
holding a large cup of some steaming, foul-smelling liquid.  She handed
it to him absently.  "Here, drink this."  She then began clearing the
breakfast dishes.

Ranma looked down at the green, thick substance.  He recoiled slightly.
"What is this?"

Kodachi, carrying a load of dishes, walked past him towards the door.
"It contains antidotes to the poisons you just ate," she said distantly
as she left.

Ranma stared at the door.  He felt the cup begin to slip from his hand.
Convulsively he tightened his grip.  He looked at the concoction.  He
felt dizzy and weak, but that may have only been the panic.  Hastily he
drank the liquid, ignoring the way it burned his tongue.  It roiled
around his stomach.

He looked at the bottom of cup, horror beginning to replace the panic.
Good God, what had he gotten mixed up in?  What kind of woman was
Kodachi?  What kind of life did the Kuno family lead here?

Kodachi lifted the cup from his hand.  He looked up at her; she wasn't
looking at him, merely going about clearing off the last of the dishes.
She left the dining room again.

Ranma drew two deep breaths, walked over, picked up his bookbag, and
left the dining room.

Kuno was waiting in the hallway.  He had his school uniform on and was
looking at Ranma dispassionately.  "Saotome Ranma, let us off to
Furinkan."

Ranma stared at him numbly.  Kuno turned and walked down the hallway.
Ranma followed him, more out of habit than anything.  Mechanical,
non-thinking actions were all he was capable of right now.

He followed Kuno down the street.  Ranma managed enough lucidity to
regard Kuno for a moment.  As a walking companion to school, he was a
far cry from Akane.

Kuno seemed to feel his gaze.  "My apologies, Saotome Ranma."

Ranma blinked.  "Uh, for what?"

"I should have warned you about my sister's cuisine."

Ranma grimaced and said nothing.

Kuno continued.  "There is much about my sister I need to educate you on
if you are to wed her."

Ranma felt a bit of relief; here was familiar territory he could get
angry about.  "We are *not* going to get married!"

"Really?  Kodachi assures me that a man of your honor will live up to
the commitments of the Saotome family."

Ranma's emotions sank back down into an unfathomable morass.  Damn the
old man anyhow.

They continued without another word.  Furinkan finally came into view.
Kuno nodded as they separated.  Ranma changed his shoes and made his way
to the classroom.

He sat in his seat next to Akane.  She didn't look at him, but she
didn't look deliberately away, either.  She just looked straight ahead,
waiting for the teacher to begin.

Ranma sighed and looked forward himself.  For the first time in his
life, he couldn't wait for school to begin.

---

After school, he decided to hang out with Daisuke and Hiroshi.  He
managed to talk them into buying him a bowl of ramen - he hadn't eaten
anything for lunch, having not taken anything from the Kuno mansion with
him.  They were full of questions about the match - particularly about
the fantastic-looking girl who had the same name he did and fought the
same way he fought.  They pestered him for her phone number or where she
lived - anything.

Ranma had no inclination to tell them that they were closer to her than
they knew.  He ate his ramen and ignored their questions.

Finally, Hiroshi realized he wasn't going to get anywhere.  He instead
said with a sigh, "Well, at least we can always try for Akane."

Ranma, the last of the ramen halfway to his lips, froze and glared at
him.

Hiroshi blanched.  "H-hey!  It's... I mean, you guys aren't engaged
anymore."

"That's right," Daisuke interjected.  "She's available, right?"

Ranma spoke quietly.  "You guys lay a hand on her and I'll..."  He
trailed off.

Daisuke and Hiroshi stared at him, waiting for him to finish.  Ranma
dropped the noodles back into the bowl and leaped over Hiroshi out of
the booth.

Damn.  This he did not need.  Those two jerks would be fawning over
Akane again.  Hell, half the school would probably be asking her out.
What the hell did they see in the uncute, unsexy...

Somehow, the familiar insults seemed inappropriate.

He shook his head and decided he couldn't put it off any longer.  He had
to go back to the Kuno mansion.  To go...

It would never be home.  He'd never really had a home, just places to
stay once for a while.  Yet, for some reason, even though he'd only been
there a few weeks, the Tendo house had seemed like home.  It had been
almost... comfortable.  Now he was forbidden to go there, and all he had
was the cold, sterile Kuno mansion.

Ranma growled.  He hated this, hated feeling depressed for hours and
hours.  He needed to snap out of it.  Lifting his head, he tried to
stride confidently back to the mansion.  He even jumped onto a few
fences, something he hadn't done since the match.  His innate
self-confidence began to grow just a little.  He'd get a grip on these
problems and overcome them.  He always did.

He strode through the main gate and into the mansion.  Security was
pretty light; he didn't see any guards.  He wondered if anyone ever
tried to steal stuff.

He looked around the foyer, wondering what to do next.  Kodachi, that
was it.  Talk to her, tell her to stop poisoning him.  At least she did
it knowingly, unlike Akane.  Perhaps that meant she would listen to
reason.

He wandered up and down the halls, looking for her.  He finally found
her in an apron and hair net again, dusting a fair-sized library.  He
strode up to her and called to her in a firm voice.  "Kodachi."

She ignored him, continuing to dust the books.

Ranma frowned.  He reached over to grab her shoulder.  "Kodachi."

She turned and stared at him.  Her eyes were unfocused and her
expression was dreamy.  She seemed to be in some far-off place.  Slowly,
she began to focus on him.  She stopped about halfway back to reality,
in Ranma's not-so-expert opinion.  "Ranma-sama," she said absently.

Ranma examined her closely.  "Hello?  Kodachi?"

"Hello?  Kodachi?"  She frowned slightly.  "Yes, Kodachi."

Ranma shook his head, his recently-reacquired confidence slipping.  "I
need to talk to you, Kodachi."

"Need to talk to me, Kodachi?"  Her lip quavered.  "Need to talk to me?
Need -"  She broke off and ran past him.  As she reached the library
door, Ranma thought he could hear her begin to sob.

Ranma's mouth dropped open.  He hesitated a second, then ran after her.

She was fast, no doubt about it.  He could barely keep his eyes on her
as she ran down some stairs, down a hallway, and down another set of
stairs to a basement.  As Ranma reached the bottom of the stairs, he
heard a door slam shut.

He turned and saw a simple white door at the end of a short hallway.  He
ran to it and tried to open it, but found that it was locked.  He was
wondering whether he should break it down when he noticed that there was
a window in the door, covered by a sliding panel.  Hesitantly, he
reached up and slid the cover aside.

Inside was a small room bare of furnishings.  There were mats on the
floor, walls, and ceiling.  They were uniformly a dull gray color.  In
the middle of the room, Kodachi was kneeling on the ground cradling her
duster and rocking on her heels.  She was sobbing uncontrollably.

Ranma cleared his throat.  "Kodachi?"

"NO!  NO!"  The screams were hysterical.  She leaped to her feet and
pounded her hands against the opposite wall, hard.  The duster broke in
half, the feathered end falling to the ground.  Kodachi slid back to the
ground, still cradling the remains of the duster, and sobbing loudly.

Ranma was so entranced by the display that the hand on his shoulder
caused him to grab it, whirl around, and throw Kuno against the wall,
his forearm pressed against his presumed assailant's throat.  Kuno took
it impassively, looking down at Ranma as he would at someone who had
dirtied his gi.

"It is best that we leave her alone," Kuno said calmly.  "She will spend
the night in that room and hurt no one, not even herself.  When she is
through she will emerge and be normal again."

Ranma bit back his first question, which was to ask Kuno what "normal"
meant around here.  "How often does she do this?"

"Periodically.  Every few weeks or so.  Sometimes she does it after
having been through a stressful time."

Ranma thought back to the match and the fight at the Tendo home.  She
had seemed so calm while the others around her flared emotionally.
Evidently it had affected her more deeply than her actions at the time
would have suggested.

He stepped back and released Kuno.  He looked at him thoughtfully.  "Do
you ever need to do this?"

"No."  Kuno looked at Ranma for a moment.  "Not yet."  He turned and
strode away back up the stairs.

Ranma slumped down against the wall, listening to Kodachi weep.  He held
his head in his hands and wondered how long he would need to stay here
before he, too, needed a cell to cry in.

---

Ranma crouched on top of the wall, waiting.  Finally, he heard the sound
of the gate closing and footsteps approaching.  As they turned the
corner, he leaped to the ground.  Nabiki and Akane took a step back in
surprise.  "Hi."

They stared at him for a second.  Finally, Nabiki turned to Akane.  "I,
uh, gotta get to school early.  Got some collections to make.  I'm going
to go on ahead."  With that she took off running.

"Nabiki..."  Akane reached out as if to stop her sister, but could only
watch as she disappeared around another corner.  Finally, she turned to
look at Ranma.

Ranma looked back at her.  "Wanna... wanna walk to school?"

"S-sure."  Her eyes were wide and her expression uncertain.  They turned
and began to make their way to Furinkan.

Ranma wondered what to say.  He'd felt an overwhelming desire to talk to
Akane, but now that he was in her presence, he couldn't formulate a
thought.  "How've you been?" was the only thing he could thing to say.

"Uh, okay I guess.  I, uh, lost P-chan."

"Oh yeah?"

"I was ice-skating, and I think I left him on the ice.  I haven't seen
him since."

Ranma could tell that she was taking her pet's loss pretty hard.  Ranma
had more important things to think about than where Ryoga had wandered
off.  "Don't worry, he'll be fine.  I'm sure wherever he is, he's being
well cared for."

"I hope so."  Akane sighed.  Then she turned her head to look at Ranma.
"How have *you* been?"

Ranma looked down.  "It... it ain't been a lot of fun."

"I imagine.  Kodachi doesn't seem like the most stable person in the
world."

"You have no idea."  Ranma shuddered.  He considered Akane again.
"How's your father?"

Akane understood the question immediately.  "Still furious at your dad.
And you.  I don't think you should try and go home for a while."

Ranma muttered a curse.  "This is all so screwed up."

"Ranma."  Akane stopped.  Ranma turned to face her.  To his shock, she
looked to be on the verge of tears.  "I'm sorry."

"Sorry?"  Ranma pulled his head back.  "For what?"

"For pushing you out of the ring with the fire hose.  For making you
lose the match.  F-for..."  A tear began to make its way down her
cheek.  "For screwing up your life."

"Akane!  It ain't *your* fault."  Ranma growled.  "I... I stayed up all
night practicing with Ryoga, when I should have known better."  He
shouldn't have let Ryoga goad him like that, shouldn't have fought him
all night.  "I let Kodachi attach Ry- P-chan to me, and she used the
oldest trick in the book!"  Look over there, indeed.  He'd been such an
idiot.  "And I... uh, I held back when I shouldn't have.  I mean..."

"She was a girl."  Akane had stopped crying and was even looking a
little irritated.  "She was a girl and you have trouble attacking
women.  Even when you *are* one."

Ranma grimaced.  "Hell, the fight should have been over in less than a
minute.  It would have been, if I'd been thinking clearly and not held
back.  So don't blame yourself, Akane.  I was the one that got me into
that mess."

"And *I* was the one that bet our engagement on the match."  Akane was
sounding more and more angry.  Exactly at who, Ranma couldn't tell.

"I don't see that you ever agreed.  Kodachi just announced that you
would be fighting for me, and everyone seemed to go along with it."
Ranma scowled.  "If anyone's at fault for that part, it's Pop.  He let
Kodachi buy me like some damn piece of fish at the market."

"That's right!"  Akane spun and kicked a nearby lamppost.  She made a
significant dent in the side of it.  "If I ever see him again, it's
panda steaks for dinner!"

Ranma grinned.  "I'll help serve."

Akane looked at him in surprise.  Then she smiled back for just a
second.  Fleeting as it was, it warmed his heart.  She quickly sobered.
"So what do we do now?"

"I don't know.  I was wondering if you had any ideas."

Akane sighed, and indicated that they should keep walking.  "I... I
guess we should just wait for my father to cool down.  Maybe we can make
him listen to reason."

Ranma nodded.  "Okay."

Akane looked at him out of the corner of her eye.  "Does it strike you
as strange?"

Ranma laughed without humor.  "The whole situation strikes me as
strange.  What part were you referring to?"

Akane spoke in a quiet, serious tone of voice.  "That after weeks of
protesting the engagement, we're both trying to get back into it?"

Ranma flushed.  "I'm just trying to get away from Kodachi.  Don't go
jumping to any conclusions."

Akane's voice hardened.  "I'm not.  I just don't want Kodachi to win,
that's all.  Besides, boys have started to come on to me again, and at
least they were afraid of you.  I just want to get them off my back."

Ranma nodded.  "Just so we understand each other."

"We do," Akane said icily.

They said nothing more as they approached Furinkan.

---

Ranma bounced around the large yard.  Training by himself was boring.
Even if he had mostly outclassed his father in pure skill, the old man
had enough dirty tricks up his sleeve to make the matches interesting.
At least the Kuno yard was big; he could bounce around all over the
place without having to worry about any damn koi ponds.

He stopped for a moment on the branch of a small tree.  On a very large
porch overlooking the back yard, Kodachi and Kuno were working out.
Kuno was thrusting with his bokken in a slow, deliberate manner,
following forms that had been established centuries ago and rigidly
adhering to them.  Ranma shook his head; Kuno was all forms, no skill.
Ranma could take him out any time he wanted to.

He looked at Kodachi.  Her style was unique.  He'd never even heard of
Rhythmic Gymnastics Martial Arts before.  Kodachi wore a leotard as she
practiced with two balls.  One she threw very high up into the air.  She
did a very rapid series of cartwheels and somersaults while always
keeping the other ball held high, whether it was held in her hand or
with her feet or resting on top of her head.  Finally she sprang upright
and, without looking, grabbed the second ball as it fell into her hand
cupped behind her back.

She set the ball down and picked up a ribbon.  She began whirling it
around her body in a pretty spiral that went down to her feet.  She
moved to the side, keeping the spiral going as she moved.  Then with a
snap she leaped into the air and sent the ribbon flying away from her.
And towards Ranma.

Ranma had been so mesmerized by her workout that he didn't react, only
noted that the ribbon wasn't aimed directly at him.  It snagged the
branch next to him, and Kodachi tugged on it tightly.  It changed the
arc of her leap, and she landed on the branch next to Ranma.

She smiled.  "Good afternoon, Ranma-sama."

Ranma studied her closely.  She seemed better, relative as that term
was.  Her voice was lively, even if it contained that superior tone that
always set his teeth on edge.  Already, though, Ranma had learned to
read her real mood by her eyes.  They seemed sharp and focused.  Full of
mischief.  He hated the eye shadow she used, the way it slanted her eyes
and made them look... well, evil.  But for now, she seemed to be in high
spirits.  "Hey there, Kodachi."

"Are you enjoying your stay here?"

"Um..."  Loaded question.  He tried switching topics.  "Say, do you guys
have any servants or anything?"

Her smile vanished.  "I handle the domestic duties in the mansion.  We
have no need of servants."

Ranma frowned.  "That's an awfully big mansion.  How do you keep it up
all by yourself?"

Her voice began to get a little icy.  "With diligence."

Ranma gulped, and decided to try another question.  "Where are your
parents?"

To Ranma's consternation, Kodachi's eyes began to glaze over.  "Do us
both a favor, Ranma.  Never ask about my parents again."

Ranma quickly waved his hands in a conciliatory fashion.  "Hey, I'm
sorry."

She laughed, the full-throated laugh that always frightened Ranma.
"Don't worry, Ranma-sama," she said through the laughter.  "It is of no
concern.  Come, let us practice together as a good family should."  With
that, she pushed him out of the tree.

"Hey!"  He flipped in the air landed on his feet.  He glared angrily up
at her.  "What do -"

He was interrupted by a ribbon whipping the end of his nose.  "Ow!"  He
jumped back and covered his nose with his hands.  That had hurt.

Kodachi landed, laughed, and threw a ball at him.  He blocked it with a
forearm.  He moved his head aside as the ribbon snaked past.  He growled
and leaped away, only to be struck in mid-air by Kuno's bokken.

Kuno looked irritated.  "Saotome!  Stay out of my way while I practice."

Ranma stuck his tongue out at him while he flew through the air.  He
turned to see where he was going to land.  He felt the blood drain from
his face as he saw the pond approaching.

Damn it all, anyway, he thought.  Where does all this stupid water come
from?

Ranma entered the pond with a splash.  She touched the bottom,
frustrated.  What to do now?  She could hold her breath a long time;
perhaps she could find a way to sneak out of the pond without anyone
seeing.  She turned around with the idea of seeing how big the pond was
and what was on the other side.  She found herself face-to-snout with an
alligator that was regarding her curiously.

Ranma let her breath out trying to scream.  She pushed off the bottom
and shot out of the pond, landing on the ground a few feet away.  She
scrabbled backwards on her seat until she came to the feet of Kodachi.
She pointed frantically at the pond.  "There's... there's... there's an
alligator in that pond!"

Kodachi was looking at her in shock.  Kuno came up and stared down at
her, his face equally surprised.

Ranma flushed, realizing that she had just given her secret away.  They
knew.  They knew everything now.

Still, she thought, perhaps this was for the best.  If Kodachi knew that
Ranma was sometimes a girl, she'd perhaps want nothing to do with her.
And Kuno would certainly be angry that one of his beloveds was actually
a guy.  The more Ranma thought about it and the longer the Kuno siblings
stared at her, the better she thought her chances were that her problems
were solved.

Finally Kuno dropped his bokken.  "Pig-tailed girl!"  He scooped her up
and hugged her closely.

Kodachi glared at her.  "What are you doing in my pond, you dreadful
woman?  Where have you hidden my fiancee?"  She produced a club and
smashed Ranma over the head with it.  "The Black Rose will punish you!"

Ranma closed her eyes as she was glomped by one crazed Kuno sibling and
attacked by the other.  She should have realized that *nothing* was
going to get resolved so easily.  And, she realized with a shudder, it
was only going to get worse before it got better.

If it ever did.

Ranma tried to keep from crying while the Kunos lavished their special
attention on her.

~*~

END PART ONE






This is part 2 of a ten-part series that deals with Kodachi, Akane, and
Ranma.  It is a tale of honor, mental illness, and love.

Previous parts can be found on my web page (URL below).

I'd be glad to listen to any comments you might have.

--
-Richard
sterman@sprynet.com

|-------------------------------------------------------|
| All of my fanfics can be found on my fanfic web page: |
| http://home.sprynet.com/sprynet/sterman/fanfic.htm    |
|-------------------------------------------------------|


Why should poor beauty indirectly seek
Roses of shadow, since his rose is true?
Why should he live, now Nature bankrupt is,
Beggar'd of blood to blush through lively veins?
O, him she stores, to show what wealth she had
In days long since, before these last so bad.

   excerpt from Sonnet LXVII
   by William Shakespeare


ROSES OF SHADOW

By Richard Lawson

Part Two:  What Honor Compels


Ranma watched the birds across the street.  They seemed to be playing a
lively game of tag.  One would take off, and another would immediately
follow.  They'd flit across and around the street before coming to rest
on a wire or tree branch, chittering loudly.  Ranma enjoyed their lively
play.

Nabiki walked by, smiling and winking her eye.  Ranma nodded absently to
her.  Soon thereafter, Akane came by.  Ranma straightened from where he
crouched atop the fence and walked along it next to Akane.

They walked for a while in silence before Ranma asked the same question
he'd been asking for a week.  "How's your father?"

"Angry.  So angry still."  Akane's voice was mixture of frustration and
sadness.  "He keeps talking about how betrayed he feels.  His life-long
friend has sold his son, choosing money over honor."

Ranma shook his head.  "I kinda always thought our fathers were just the
same.  But there's one big difference.  Your father has honor."

"Yeah.  Maybe too damned much.  I don't know why he's taking it out on
you."

"Sins of the father and all that."  Ranma shook his head.  "How long do
you think it'll be?"

It was another question Ranma asked almost daily.  This time, however,
Akane's answer was a lot more pessimistic.  "A long time, I think.  He's
not furious any more, but his anger is constant, simmering.  I haven't
seen him this way since... in a long time."

"Damn."  Ranma was a little surprised at the vehemence in his voice.

Akane tried to mollify him.  "Don't worry, we'll get through to him.
Nabiki works him over all the time.  Even Kasumi helps, in her own way.
He'll break down.  He always does."

Ranma allowed himself to take a little comfort in her words.  He knew he
needed all the hope he could get.

Akane looked over at him.  "Still bad?"

My, she was being solicitous today.  Ranma shook his head.  "Nothing I
can't handle."

Akane said nothing in a very irritated way.  Ranma let out a sigh of the
unjustly persecuted.

They went on to school in this manner.  Ranma had to fight hard not to
smile.

---

Ranma ducked under the hoop and crouched, waiting for Kodachi's next
attack.  She had another hoop in her hand and was whirling it above her
head, watching him closely.

Ranma took in the tactical situation.  He had to stay away from the
pond, for more than the obvious reasons - the alligator behaved nicely
around Kodachi, but he'd seen it devour a side of beef with unbridled
enthusiasm.

Ranma also had to avoid Kuno.  Kuno always stayed in one area of the
backyard, but defended that area with vigor.  While Ranma could handle
Kuno easily, he'd leave an opening while doing so, and Kodachi was
uncanny at exploiting such openings.

Another hoop came flying at him.  He rolled to the side as the hoop
buried itself deeply into a tree.  Kodachi was not holding back at all.

Ranma kinda liked that about her.

Still, he was beginning to figure her out.  As versatile as her attacks
were, they were still limited in number.  He had the hoops, balls, and
clubs worked out; she'd never be able to hit him with any of those.

The only thing he hadn't yet got a handle on was her ribbon.  As he
watched, she pulled the damn thing out and began twirling it ominously.
She could do a heck of a lot of things with it, as if it were a part of
her body she could control with just a thought.

Ranma slowly straightened, keeping his hands ready.  He wanted to try
something different today.  The ribbon came flying at him.  Instead of
trying to avoid it, he grabbed it with his hands.  Kodachi tried to rip
it out of his hands, but he was ready for it and instead gave the ribbon
a strong tug himself.  Kodachi, refusing to let go, was lifted off her
feet.  She flew through the air a few feet before landing,
somersaulting, and jumping to her feet.  By that time Ranma had gained
enough slack on the ribbon to throw a couple of loops around her,
pinning her arms to her side.

Ranma grinned.  "Gotcha."

"That you did, Ranma-sama."  Her voice was a little off.  Ranma studied
her, and noticed that her cheeks and eyes were shining.  Ranma winced
internally; for the past couple of weeks she had been bright and
cheerful.  She still poisoned his food - Kuno had been a big help in
identifying what was safe to eat - and she fed her dangerous pets with
relish.  But overall she'd been friendly and almost nice.

Yet there was always an edge to her voice, a hint of something only
barely controlled.  It surfaced sometimes when she laughed.  Now it
seemed to be coming out again.  Ranma quickly went over and unwrapped
the ribbon.  "You okay?"

She laughed, which caused the hair to rise on Ranma's neck.  "I'm fine,
Ranma-sama!"  Still laughing, she bounced into the house, leaving black
rose petals in her wake.

Ranma frowned.  The rose petals were new.  That is, this was the first
time he'd seem them since moving into the mansion.  He wondered what
they meant.  He wondered if it was safe to wonder.

Kuno finished his practice and walked by Ranma into the house.  They
ignored each other.  Ranma had never cared much for the pompous jerk,
and the extra time with him hadn't improved Ranma's opinion.  Kuno, for
his part, seemed to ignore just about everything.  He lived in some
private world that only allowed for occasional intrusions by reality.

Ranma waited a moment for Kuno to find his way, then went in after him.
He walked down the hallway, and stopped at the sight of Kodachi.  She
was still wearing her leotard, but had thrown an apron over it.  She was
on her hands and knees polishing the woodwork.

He never could understand it.  Kodachi would spend hours each day
maintaining the large Kuno mansion.  There were, indeed, no servants
employed by the Kunos.  Kodachi did all of the domestic work herself.
She threw herself into the menial tasks with zeal, cleaning, dusting,
vacuuming, and washing for hours on end.  She was Kasumi on
amphetamines.

Ranma stepped down the hallway so he could see her face clearly.  Her
eyes were mostly focused, which was good.  She was concentrating every
bit of her attention on the grains of wood in front of her.  Ranma knew
she would be doing this late into the evening, possibly even after
midnight.

He decided to leave her alone.  He went up to the room he slept in.  He
didn't want to call it "his" room; he didn't feel comfortable in it.  He
hadn't slept in a bed in years, and found the things too soft and
luxurious for his tastes.

Also, he hadn't slept alone in his entire life.  Much to his disgust,
there was a large part of him that missed the company of the old man.

Ranma shook his head to clear it of such thoughts.  He washed up in the
private bathroom off of the bedroom.  And then, because he had
absolutely nothing else to do - heck, even a fight with Ryoga wouldn't
have been so bad - he began his homework.

---

Ranma dropped into place beside Akane.  They began their journey to
school together.

Ranma spoke quietly.  "How's-"

"Nothing's changed."  Her voice was irritated and angry.  "If something
changes, I'll tell you.  There's no reason to pester me every day."

"I ain't pestering you!"  Ranma whipped his head away.  "No reason to
take it out on me."

"Take *what* out on you?"

"The fact that you- we're not engaged anymore.  It ain't my fault."

"Who says I wanted to be engaged to you, idiot!  Go ahead and sleep with
that deranged floozy, see if I care!"

"I am *not* sleeping with her!"

"You have merely to ask, Ranma-sama."

Ranma nearly jumped out of his skin.  Kodachi dropped from a tree and
landed in front of them.  She was dressed in the school uniform of St.
Hebereke's, which was nowhere near Furinkan.  Her eyes were slightly
wild and drifted in and out of focus.

She looked angrily at Akane.  "Is this how you keep your promises?"

Akane's temper was more than equal to the task.  "I never made any
promise.  You just assumed I had.  Nobody asked what I wanted.  Nobody
*ever* asks what I want!"

"Poor dear."  The words were said with a ghost of mockery, as if Kodachi
was trying to taunt Akane but couldn't quite remember how.  "Everyone
picks on you, how sad."  Her voice hardened.  "Still, you would do best
to remember that your engagement was nullified.  Ranma belongs to me."

That was enough for Ranma.  "Shut up, Kodachi.  Damn it!  I belong to no
one!"

Her eyes swiveled to meet his.  "Is this how you operate, Ranma-sama?
Do you have so little honor that you cannot see any commitment through
to completion?"

The words cut him to the quick.  "I have honor, Kodachi."

"Oh?"  Akane now turned on him.  "What does that mean?  Do you *want* to
marry that... that... Kuno?"  She said the family name as if it was an
insult.

"I didn't say that!"  Ranma was angry beyond reason.  "You're always
jumping to conclusions, always assuming the worst about me, always
calling me a pervert and stuff.  You can't think of why I might be glad
we're not engaged any more?"

Akane exploded.  "I only said those things because you *are* a pervert.
You probably peek in on Kodachi and pose for Kuno, right?  I don't know
why we keep trying to get you out of that hellhole.  You and Kodachi
deserve each other."

She stepped around Kodachi, heading towards Furinkan.  "Keep him, see if
I care."

Kodachi called after her in a reasonable simulation of anger.  "Stay
away from my fiancee!"

Akane yelled over her shoulder.  "Tell your fiancee to stop pestering
me!"  She began running quickly away.

Kodachi turned back to Ranma, a small smile on her face.  "Good.  That
problem is solved."

Ranma had never wanted to hit a woman so much in his life.  Had never
wanted to hit *anyone* so much.  "You enjoyed that, didn't you?"  He was
surprised by how soft and deadly his voice was.

She laughed insanely, as always.  "Merely protecting my investment,
Ranma-sama.  Can't let some harridan take you away from me."

Ranma made a fist with one hand, then unclenched it after a second.
"Get out of my sight," he said through clenched teeth.  He stepped
around her, taking the same route Akane had taken.

"Ranma-sama..."  Her voice sounded almost pleading.  Ranma couldn't care
less.  He needed very much for her to disappear forever.

---

Ranma lay on the floor, staring at the ceiling.  Life was hell.

School had been decidedly unpleasant.  He and Akane had ignored each
other with a ferocity that sent whispers throughout the halls of
Furinkan.  Ranma had snapped at everyone around him and had spent a good
deal of time out in the hallway holding a bucket of water.

Returning to the Kuno mansion had found Kodachi folding clothes at a
frenetic pace.  All of Ranma's dinner had been poisoned, leaving him
with what he could scrounge from the kitchen.  Kodachi had not
participated in a workout after dinner, instead concentrating on
polishing the silverware.  Ranma had examined her eyes; she was mostly
present, but flickering wildly in and out of reality.  He had judged her
to be several days away from re-entering the cell, if his limited
experience was any guide.  But she had been extremely worked up, and
dealing with it in her own peculiar way.

Ranma sighed and wondered at what his life had come to.  Everything had
been relatively okay until China.  When the old man had taken him to the
springs with no idea of the dangers that lurked there.  When the old man
had forced him into an engagement with someone he'd known nothing
about.  When the old man had reneged on that engagement and sold Ranma
to an unbalanced woman.

Damn the old man anyhow.

"Psst."

Ranma frowned and sat up.  "Kodachi, go to bed."

"Shut up, boy."  The stage whisper was coming from the window.  "Pack
your things and let's get out of here."

"Pop!"  Ranma sprang up and ran over to the window.  Genma was crouched
on the windowsill, looking furtively around.

"Hurry," Genma whispered urgently, "before the Kuno family ninjas come
after us."

"They don't got no ninjas, Pop."  Still, hurrying before Kodachi found
out was good.  "Wait."

Ranma ran over, opened the closet, and grabbed his backpack.  He spent
two frantic minutes shoving his things inside.  He was missing some of
his clothes, including one of his favorite shirts.  Kodachi had them
with the laundry.  The hell with them, he decided.  He had other
priorities now.  He shouldered his backpack and ran to the window.
"Ready."

Genma was looking around the well-appointed room.  "Did she give you any
money?  Jewels?  Surely she gave you something nice and valuable that
isn't too heavy?"

"Pop!"  Ranma pushed him off the windowsill.  Genma fell to the ground
and stared up in surprise.  Ranma jumped and landed lightly on the
ground beside him.  "Enough, Pop.  I don't want to take nothing from
this place.  Let's go."

Genma grunted in disappointment.  Nevertheless, he ran off into the
night.  Ranma followed.

They ran through the streets, backtracking and changing direction
several times.  It was a routine Ranma was familiar with; his father was
trying to avoid any would-be pursuers.  Ranma wondered when they would
begin to make their way back to the Tendo Dojo.

After a while, it became clear they were leaving the city.  Ranma looked
back towards Nerima and grabbed Genma's arm.  "Pop, where are we going?"

"We can't stay here, boy.  It's too hot.  Kodachi will be looking for
us, and Tendo has... well, we won't be welcome there for a long time."

Ranma growled, but had to accept the logic.  Maybe in a few months they
could return, and Kodachi would have forgotten all about Ranma and
fixated on something else.  And Soun wouldn't be mad anymore and would
let them say in the Tendo house again.  And Akane... and Akane would be
there.

Ranma resigned himself to patience, something he wasn't used to.
"Okay.  Where are we going?"

Genma turned and began walking off.  "San Francisco."

Ranma stood frozen.  Genma walked quite a distance before reluctantly
turning back to stand in front of Ranma again.  "C'mon, boy, who knows
what forces she can bring to bear?"

"San Francisco?  San Francisco?"  Ranma literally could not believe his
ears.

Genma sighed.  "We need to get far away.  Besides, I have a friend we
can stay with.  Owns a jewelry store there.  His wife's younger sister
is unmarried, too.  I was thinking -"

"San FranCISCO!"  Ranma grabbed his father's gi.  "Are you outta your
mind, Pop?  I am *not* going to America."

"Boy," Genma said in a pleading voice, "we can't stay here.  Kodachi's
got thugs that can track us all over Japan.  Besides, America will be
good for you.  Maybe we could get you into the movies or something."

"That is IT!"  Ranma shoved Genma away.  "I am damn tired of you
screwing around with my life, Pop.  First China, then the engagement,
then Kodachi, and now this!  Not to mention all the trouble we got into
before.  I've had enough!"

Ranma spun on his heel and stormed away.  "You've screwed up my life
enough.  You sold me, Pop.  Sold me and deserted me.  I'd say that means
you've given up the right to tell me what to do."

Ranma stopped when he felt Genma's grip on his shoulder.  "Boy."  Genma
sounded defensive, almost petulant.  "I was always coming after you.
This was an easy way for us to make a million yen.  Now we've got it and
we can move on, go to the next town like we always have."

Ranma turned his head and looked at his father.  "Does honor mean so
little to you?  Just a way to fool people long enough so you can steal
from them?  I thought you were better than that.  You taught me better
than that.  Why can't you live up to your own words?  Why can't you
uphold the honor of the Saotome clan?"

The old man didn't answer.  He stared at Ranma, something like shame
covering his face.

Ranma shrugged his shoulder out of his father's grasp.  "Don't even try
to talk to me until you've grown up, Genma."

He stalked off, leaving his father behind.

---

The streets of Nerima were mostly deserted.  Ranma walked through them
with no clear idea of what he was going to do now.
In the back of his mind, he'd always known that the old man would be
coming for him.  He'd been biding his time, waiting for Genma to rescue
him.  Little had he realized that he was only going to be taken from one
bad situation and put into another.  He couldn't rely on Genma anymore.
For anything.

So what was left to rely on?

Honor.  The word came back to him.  So long he had berated his father
for having no honor, yet he had been willing to run away from his
obligations at the drop of a hat.  He'd been having a bad time - a
*horrible* time - and had jumped at the chance to escape.

"Do you have so little honor that you cannot see any commitment through
to completion?"  Kodachi's words buzzed through his head.  As horrifying
as it was, his father had the right to arrange whatever engagement he
saw fit.  He had arranged something with Kodachi that, despite the
motivations behind it, Ranma was honor-bound to accept as valid.  The
prior engagement to Akane was not binding at this time, since both Genma
and Soun had repudiated it.

Ranma idly wondered what other agreements Genma had made on his behalf,
and when those might be coming up to bite him.

Ranma grimaced.  There was no helping it.  He'd have to stay with
Kodachi until he could find a way to get her to annul the engagement.
Once Kodachi had released him, he could go and talk to Soun and try to
convince him that honor meant more to him than it did to his father.

He remembered Akane's angry shouts this morning and quickly revised his
plan.  All he had to do right now was get out from underneath Kodachi's
thumb.  He could decide what to do then.

Reluctantly, he made his way back towards the Kuno mansion.

This late at night the gate was locked, the only token effort at
security the Kunos made.  Ranma had never bothered to learn the code to
activate the gate; instead, he leaped over the wall and landed inside
the grounds.  He made his way to the mansion and entered the foyer.

The mansion was dark.  Ranma removed his shoes and padded across the
thick carpet.  He stepped on something sharp and cried out.  He reached
down and picked it up, examining it as best he could in the darkness.
It was a fork.  One of the pieces of silverware Kodachi had been
polishing earlier.

Something twisted Ranma's stomach.  He walked into the dining room.  As
his eyes adjusted he could see more silverware littering the floor.  A
few of the knives were stuck in the wall.

"Damn," Ranma said softly.  Using all of the courage he could muster, he
reentered the hallway and found the door that led to the basement.  He
opened it and walked down.

The lights were on.  He could see the door at the end of the hallway
perfectly, just as he could hear the sobs quite clearly.

Ranma moved slowly down the hallway.  He paused at the door, then used
all of the willpower he had at his disposal to slide open the window.

Kodachi was inside, wearing her apron over her school uniform, just as
he'd seen her last.  She was kneeling on the ground, crying and sobbing
and rocking on her heels, all just like before.  This time, however,
instead of the feather duster, she was cradling one of Ranma's shirts.

Ranma closed the window with a snap.  The crying inside continued
unabated; he was certain she wasn't aware of him.

He didn't want to do this.  He didn't want to be here.  Every fiber of
his being called on him to run down the hallway and up the stairs.  He
wanted to find his father and go to San Francisco and leave this all
behind.  Problems unrelated to martial arts were things to be avoided if
possible, run away from if necessary.  He'd never had to deal with
anything serious, never had to help someone with a deep emotional
problem, and he preferred to keep it that way.

Run.  Run now.  Leave your honor behind.  What the hell good has it ever
done you anyway.

Ranma reached down and grabbed the door handle.  He tried to turn it.
It was locked.  He began to pull his hand away, paused, then gripped it
tightly and twisted convulsively.  Something snapped, and the door swung
open.

Kodachi turned at the intrusion.  She looked up at him.  He had to keep
from recoiling.  Her eyes were red and her face was puffy.  Her
eyeshadow had mixed with her tears and left black streaks running down
her face.  Her lip was trembling and her eyes were distant, unfocused,
mad.

Ranma quailed and actually leaned backwards, preparatory to turning
around and running.  He scrapped together every last bit of courage,
honor, and self-respect that he possessed, and held his ground.

Slowly, very slowly, her eyes began to focus.  As they did, astonishment
began to fight through her sobbing, along with a kind of fearful hope.
"R-Ranma-sama?"

Ranma nodded.  "Yeah," he said in a subdued voice.  "It's me."

"You... you came back.  You didn't leave me."  She said this with
amazement.

Honor compelled him to say the next words.  Honor, and something else.
He knelt on the ground in front of her as he said them.  "I ain't gonna
leave, Kodachi.  Not without your say-so."

Her sobs, which had been ebbing, began again in full force.
"Ranma-sama!"  She reached over and hugged him fiercely, sobbing into
his chest.  This sobbing sounded a little different.  Ranma could
hear... control.  It wasn't hysterical, it wasn't unstoppable.  It
sounded more like... relief.

He sighed and hugged her to him, stroking her hair and comforting her.
And as he did so, he felt something release inside him, something that
told him he had done the right thing, and had begun something that was
going to be all right.

~*~

END PART TWO  (more to come)






This is the third part of a ten part series focusing on Ranma, Kodachi,
and Akane.  It is a tale of honor, mental illness, and love.  Previous
parts can be found on my web page (URL below).

Let me know what you think.

--
-Richard
sterman@sprynet.com

|-------------------------------------------------------|
| All of my fanfics can be found on my fanfic web page: |
| http://home.sprynet.com/sprynet/sterman/fanfic.htm    |
|-------------------------------------------------------|



Why should poor beauty indirectly seek
Roses of shadow, since his rose is true?
Why should he live, now Nature bankrupt is,
Beggar'd of blood to blush through lively veins?
O, him she stores, to show what wealth she had
In days long since, before these last so bad.

   excerpt from Sonnet LXVII
   by William Shakespeare


ROSES OF SHADOW

By Richard Lawson

Part Three:  Why Should He Live


Ranma began to drift awake.  It was taking a long time.  Well, it
*always* took a long time; sleep was something he enjoyed a lot.  This
time, however, he felt particularly resistant to the idea of regaining
consciousness.

He had enough awareness now to realize that he wasn't in his bed.  He
appeared to be sitting against the wall.  A padded wall.  There was a
weight on his stomach.  And his hand was resting on something... soft.

Finally he could deny it no longer.  He woke up.

He was in the cell, as he feared he would be.  And Kodachi was sleeping
with her head on his stomach, also as he feared.  His hand was caught up
in her hair, resting lightly on her head.

"Damn," he swore softly.  Again.  Kodachi had hugged him and sobbed into
his chest for half an hour last night.  Then she had sniffled for
another hour, her arms still wrapped around him.  He'd had an arm draped
over her shoulders and had been absently stroking her hair.  Finally,
she'd fallen asleep, and Ranma had not wanted to disturb her too
quickly.  He'd decided to wait until she was deep asleep before moving.
Unfortunately, he had evidently fallen asleep himself.  Somewhere during
the night their positions had altered slightly.

Ranma studied Kodachi's face.  It looked peaceful, although it was
frightfully streaked with her eyeshadow.  Still, Ranma knew that a
peaceful look meant nothing on Kodachi - it was her eyes that told the
story of her rationality, and he couldn't see them.

He imagined what her reaction was going to be when she woke up.
Overjoyed, probably maniacally so, to wake up in his arms.  The sickly
sweet devotion she'd shower on him.  Calling him "Ranma-sama" over and
over.

Ranma wanted no part of that.

Slowly he disentangled his hand from her hair and lifted her shoulders.
He scooted out from underneath her and gently laid her on the mat.
Quietly, he gathered himself and opened the door.  He heard her groan
softly, and quickly stepped through the door and ran lightly down the
hallway.

He ran to his room, his mind in a whirl.  Sleeping with Kodachi was
something he never thought would happen, and he hoped never to repeat
the experience.  For some reason, he kept thinking guiltily of Akane.

He ran into the bathroom, glancing at the clock as he did so.  He didn't
have much time.  He threw off his clothes, quickly soaped up, filled a
bucket with water, and dumped it over himself.  She realized her mistake
instantly.  Growling, she quickly filled it again with hot water and
changed back.

Ranma ran out into the bedroom and ground to a halt.  He realized two
things instantly: Kodachi was standing in the bedroom doorway, and he
was naked.  Reacting quickly, he dove into the walk-in closet.  Someone
had put his backpack there.  No need to guess who.

Still, it was convenient.  He put on a fresh set of clothes, grabbed his
bookbag, and walked back out into the bedroom.

Kodachi had not moved.  Ranma noted that she had washed her face.  It
was completely devoid of makeup.  In fact, Ranma had a little difficulty
believing it was her.  She looked cute without all the eyeshadow.

Her eyes, he was saddened to notice, weren't entirely in focus.  "Where
are you off to, Ranma-sama?"

Ranma felt a bit of annoyance.  As usual, she was ignoring how impolite
it was of her to peek in on him, concentrating only on the things that
affected her.  "I'm off to school.  I'm gonna be late."

Her voice was neutral, which Ranma knew was dangerous.  "You have plenty
of time.  My brother will not be leaving for another twenty minutes."

Ranma shrugged.  "I like to be early."  He moved closer to the door, but
she didn't move out of his way.

"You're going to meet her again, aren't you?"  The voice contained no
hint of accusation, but her eyes drifted farther out of focus.

Damn.  He had no time for this.  He turned and walked towards the
still-open window.

"Ranma-sama!"  Her voice sounded a little shrill.  "You stay away from
her!  You belong to me!"

Ranma whirled so quickly he surprised himself.  He glared at her.
"Listen to me, Kodachi, this is the last time I'm gonna say this.  I -
belong - to - nobody."

She just looked back at him with her cute face and unbalanced eyes and
an expression that was part hurt and part supplication.  Ranma couldn't
bear the sight of it, so he turned and jumped out the window.

This was nuts, the whole thing was nuts.  He wanted to get away, to get
Kodachi to let him go.  Yet all he had done was given her more reasons
to obsess over him.

Ranma considered, for the first time, the possibility that she would
never let him go.  He shuddered.

Lost in his morose thoughts, he didn't realize where he was headed until
the gates of Furinkan came into view.  He blinked at them.  He'd meant
to go meet Akane, but his feet had taken him here instead.  His stomach
twisted a little at how Akane would feel about him skipping their
morning rendezvous, especially after the fight they'd had yesterday.  It
wouldn't be pretty.

She'd probably yell at him.  In a way, he was looking forward to it.

Smiling, he entered the schoolyard.

---

Ranma loitered near the shoe lockers.  She readjusted her pants slightly
to they wouldn't slip, and waited.

Akane appeared and blinked at her.  Ranma looked back.  This had been
another day of silence between them, although there had been none of the
heat of yesterday.  Now Akane didn't look mad, merely surprised.
"Ranma?"

"Akane."  Ranma lifted her bookbag over her shoulder.  "Do you wanna...
wanna get an ice cream or something?"

Akane looked at her for a second.  "S-sure."  She opened up her locker,
changed her shoes, and walked with Ranma out of the school.

They found an ice cream shop, relatively removed from the after-school
crowd.  Akane ordered a milkshake and Ranma ordered a sundae.  They were
quickly served.  Akane took a slow, thoughtful sip, looking at Ranma and
not seeming to be paying any attention at all to the milkshake.  Ranma
shoved the ice cream around with her spoon, not knowing what to say.

Akane finally broke the ice.  "Why are you a woman?"

Ranma grimaced.  "Kodachi."

"Hmm?"

"Well, you know, she doesn't like it when we're together.  You saw her
yesterday.  Today she's... a little wacko.  I'm afraid of what she'd do
if she saw us together."

Akane made a little 'o' of understanding.  "And she doesn't know that
this is you, too."

Ranma nodded.  "I figure we're as safe as we can be."

Akane took a dutiful sip of her milkshake, her attention obviously
focused on Ranma.  "So..."

Ranma scooped up the cherry and let it fall again.  "So."

"You wanted to see me."

Ranma lifted a corner of her mouth.  "Sorry about yesterday."

Akane nodded solemnly.  "Me too."

The air thick with silence.

"Uh, Akane..."

"Yes?"

"You know I'd do anything to get out of that damn mansion, don't you?"

"Do I?"

Ranma lifted her eyes from her sundae to Akane.  Akane's face was
studious.  She hadn't spoken in anger or accusation; she seemed to be
merely asking for clarification on a minor technical point.  Ranma
gathered her courage.  "I mean, you know, it wasn't so bad when I was
living with... at your house."

"I... I don't think it was so bad having you and your father as our
guests."

Ranma drew a deep breath.  There it was, the first admission made on
both sides.  Not much, but it could perhaps be a foundation to build
on.  Ranma tried to slow her racing heart, calm her raging thoughts.
She needed to say this next thing carefully.  For once, just once, she
had to slow down and work it out.  She had to get this right.

Ranma shoved the melting mess of ice cream aside and leaned forward,
looking into Akane's eyes.  They widened slightly before she, too,
pushed aside her milkshake and leaned forward.

Then the wall exploded.

Ranma instinctively reached over to pull Akane's head down to the table,
covering it with her own arms.  The wall collapsed inward, raising a lot
of dust.

Ranma looked over, half-expecting to see Kodachi in a rage.  There was a
shape outlined in the settling dust, and as it resolved itself, Ranma's
mouth went dry.  Not now.  Of all times, not now.

The shape pointed one of its weapons at her.  "Ranma.  I kill!"

Akane had raised her head and was looking at the young woman curiously.
Ranma barely registered that, instead leaning back in the booth, trying
to stay as far away as possible.  "Sh-sh-shampoo!"

Shampoo fairly radiated anger tinged with triumph.  "Ranma!"  She raised
one of her bonbori.  "Kill!"  She leaped for the table.

Ranma vaulted away, noting that Akane had rolled under the booth and
out.  Shampoo's bonbori smashed the table where Ranma had been leaning.

Ranma landed atop a counter, still unable to fully come to te