Nekophobia Part 6: A Night to Remember by David Eddy Last modified: Tuesday, 3 June 1997 A fan fiction based on Takahashi Rumiko's Manga series, Ranma 1/2. The characters of Ranma 1/2 are the property of Takahashi Rumiko and her licensees. Warning: Occasional adult concepts. Some readers may be offended by some of the material contained herein. "What are we going to do with Shampoo?" asked Akane, looking down at the unconscious girl lying on the dojo floor. "Take her back to the Nekohanten again?" Ranma cocked an eye at doorway and by implication at the falling rain outside. "Can't we wait until it's not raining?" "Put her in the guest room," said Nabiki. "What if she wakes up?" asked Akane. Ranma hoisted Shampoo over his shoulders. "I'll hit her sleep spot again," he said. "That'll keep her quiet." * * * Ukyou hummed to herself as she put the finishing touches to her hair. The dinner invitation from Ranma's mother had been completely unexpected, but even though the notice was very short and she would have to close her okonomiyaki-ya specially there was no question of her not attending. The fact that the invitation had come from Nodoka was significant, she thought. It obviously would have something to do with the resolution of the problem of Ranma having multiple fiancees... and she wouldn't miss that for the world. But she couldn't help but wonder whether she would still be his fiancee at the end of the night. She shook her head to put the thought out of her mind and stepped back to look at herself in her mirror. Yes, she would do. The best defence is a good offence... and her claim was at least as good as Akane's, anyway! Ranchan would be hers! She grabbed her umbrella and a light wrap and headed out into the warm, steady rain. * * * Ryouga watched from behind a lamp-post as Ukyou locked the front door of her store and walked off down the street. On impulse he decided to follow her, and he ran after her on little pig legs, cursing his short stride in this form. Maybe she would be going to the dojo... why else close her store on a business night?. The dojo... and Akane. Tonight he would pledge his love to her and win her heart from that fiend Ranma. Tonight! Just as soon as he found some hot water. * * * The chauffer-driven black limousine drove steadily through the streets of the greater Tokyo metropolitan area. Resting her chin in her palm, Kunou Kodachi looked out the rain-streaked window next to her at the shop-fronts and houses going by and thought ahead. She did not understand what her father saw in those wretched islands. She and her brother had been dragged over to Hawaii by their father as a "treat", but after just one week she had been unable to stand it any longer and had persuaded her father to allow her to go home. "Just think, sister dearest, after an eternity away we are at last returned to the land of our ancestors. My heart rejoices, for I shall date with the beautiful Akane-san and the vital Osage-no-onna tonight!" Kodachi spared a contemptuous glance at her elder brother. "I don't see what you see in that vile tart you call Osage-no- onna, oniisama," she said. "Now as for my Ranma-sama... I haven't seen him in a long week! I burn to be near him!" She looked back outside. "I think that tonight will be the night," she added to herself. "My Ranma-sama will come to me at last." 'With a little encouragement from me,' she added in her mind as the limousine at last turned into their street. * * * Nodoka knelt facing her husband in the formal "receiving" area of the Tendou home, a small six-tatami room near the front door. The room was bare save a vase holding a single flower and a few ink drawings hung with simple elegance on the walls. The shoji facing the outside were open, as were the outer doors, revealing a section of the garden not normally seen. Outside, the sky had lightened somewhat, but still the rain drummed on the roof... if not quite so heavily as before. The pleasant, clean smell of rain and damp earth drifted in through the open doors. The family katana, unwrapped from its usual cloth covering, lay on the tatami in front of Nodoka's knees. Tears ran down her cheeks, a match for those streaming down Genma's face. "Why did you do it, anata?" she asked. "You must have known that there could be only one outcome." For a long, long moment, there was silence between them broken only by the sound of falling rain and the sounds of cooking coming from the kitchen somewhere on the other side of the closed shoji. "All is not lost," said Genma at last. "I think I know where to find that yatai..." Nodoka looked at him with eyes suddenly hard. "You would not lie to me, would you, anata?" Genma sighed, deflating. "No," he said with his shoulders slumped forward a little. "It is only a slim hope, but... I will begin immediately." She bowed her head, contemplating the katana. She stroked it with one hand. "At least there is no doubt as to who Ranma's true fiancee is. Ukyou-san's claim cannot possibly stand against that of the Tendou family." "I know." Convulsively her hand tightened on the katana, lifting it. Suddenly she pointed the hilt at her husband, gripping it by the sheath, her eyes now angry. "Then how could you *possibly* have let Ranma persist in the perception that he owed Ukyou some debt?! Because of that, Ukyou has been allowed to think that he had some chance with our son, and now she must be hurt!" She brought the katana back to her chest, a brief flash of bronze at the top of the sheath showing where the sword had slipped out a little by her movements, the little catch that should have kept it securely in place having long since broken. "Because I didn't realise he thought she was his fiancee!" "How can you not have realised! Akane-chan told me Ranma referred to her for a while as his cute fiancee!! Ranma!!" She began gesticulating with the sword again. "Why did you do it?! Genma, this whole situation is almost entirely your fault! How could you have possibly engaged your son a *second* time when you *knew* of your... the *family's* promise to the Tendo family is completely beyond me! Were you actually *trying* to dishonour yourself? Because you have certainly succeeded!" "But Nodoka-chan, Ranma chose!" Nodoka glared at her husband, gesturing sharply with the katana she still held by the sheath. "From what Akane tells me of the day Ranma *discovered* that Kuonji Ukyou-san was a *girl*, he did *not* choose to be engaged! Don't *lie* to me, you useless man!!" Nodoka gestured violently with the katana in Genma's direction, and the blade flew out of the scabbard and zipped past his head. The hilt banged into one of the thicker edge uprights of the shoji to land untidily on floor behind him. A suddenly-pale Genma was instantly still. "Oops," said Nodoka embarrassedly. * * * Ryouga watched covertly as Ukyou hesitated at the gate to the Tendou-ke. She stood under the small roof above the gate, seemingly unsure of herself. Then she shook herself and decisively opened the gate and passed inside. And closed it behind herself. There was no way he could open that gate as a pig. Fortunately, all was not lost. From prior experience, Ryouga knew there was a small hole in the fence at ground level that would let him inside while he was in his pig form. If he could only find it. * * * Ukyou nervously wiped her palms on the seat of her dress as she followed Nabiki to the living room. Although she had briefly seen Ranma's mother on other occasions, this would be the first time they had been introduced. She knew that she had only this one chance to make an impression good enough to overturn Akane's claim, and she was determined not to make a mistake. "Obasan, meet Kuonji Ukyou," said Nabiki. "Ukyou-san, meet Saotome Nodoka, Ranma's mother." * * * "Bukiii!" 'Aha! Found it!' thought Ryouga as he wriggled through a small hole in the fence around the Tendou-ke. The kami were indeed smiling on him tonight. For tonight he would pledge his love to Akane, and she would leave Ranma for him! Now, to find the bathroom! * * * For Akane, dinner was an odd mixture of nightmare and satisfaction. Ever since she had arrived, Ukyou had been making a thorough pest of herself, leaning against Ranma, chatting amiably with his mother, and generally ingratiating herself. The two were getting on really well, like mother and long-lost daughter, and Ranma was being nice to her as usual as well. Only the occasional -- well, more than occasional -- squeeze of her hand by Ranma under the table had allowed her to keep smiling through the meal, however thin that smile might be. Every time Ranma squeezed her hand, she made herself a mental picture. In that picture, she stuck her tongue out at Ukyou, pulled down an eyelid to give her the 'red eye', and said, "Piiida!", just like a twelve-year-old would. But it was only in her head, unfortunately. She very much wanted to do those actions for real... but it was very satisfying, knowing that the game was won and the opponent did not even know she had lost. She contented herself with that knowledge and her spiteful mental games. The rain had finally trailed to a halt a few minutes ago, and now the cicadas were starting up again. Akane tilted her head as the faint sound of a pig's squeal drifted in from outside over the growing noise of the cicadas. Suddenly thoughts of Ukyou were pushed from her head and she glared at the table as the thought of Ryouga's hentai activities *in her bed* got her steamed all over again. She smiled a savage smile as she recalled Shampoo's first meal for Ranma served in the classroom at Fuurinkan... Ryouga served with rice and condiments. She mentally winced as she realised how unfair it must have seemed to Ranma when she had sought to protect "her P-chan" from him. Ryouga owed her a lot. "Hey, Akane, are you okay?" Ranma's voice penetrated her visions of a beaten, folded, spindled, and mutilated Ryouga and returned her attention to the living room. Everyone was looking at her. "Akane?" She smiled a dazzling smile at her fiancee. "Everything's fine, Ranma." Because she had just thought of the *perfect* revenge on Ryouga. She found herself hoping that he would somehow manage to find his way into the bathroom. She very much wanted to see him again... soon. * * * With the dinner eaten and cleared away, and Kasumi's amazing efforts profusely acknowledged, tea had now been served. Ranma sat back for a moment and watched as Ukyou chatted with his mother, wondering how they would deal with the problem that was Ukyou. A low splash from the bathroom attracted his attention for a moment. He glanced in that direction briefly, then returned his attention to the table, hoping both that Akane hadn't noticed and that Ryouga would not be able to find his way to the living room. Huh, fat chance. That guy was always turning up where he wasn't wanted. Akane noticed Ranma suddenly glance at one of the shoji, then quickly look down at the table with a dark look. She frowned a little in confusion, wondering what it was that had grabbed his attention for a moment. It must have been some sound or other from the... Bathroom. Ryouga must be in the house. She smiled tightly to herself and briefly grabbed Ranma's hand, her eyes glittering in anticipation. The the mood at the table changed, as conversation stilled. Nodoka sipped her tea firmly, her face set, before speaking into the sudden silence. "Ukyou-san," began Nodoka, "I--" "Hohohohohohohoho!" Kodachi appeared from outside, dressed in her usual gymnastics leotard. "Ranma-sama, it's so good to see you again! Are you ready to take me on our date tonight?" Nodoka looked at Kodachi in confusion. "Excuse me, but who are you?" Kodachi stood in the open doorway, one hand resting on her hip, eyes wide, haughtily looking down her nose at Nodoka. "I am Kunou Kodachi, the Black Rose, captain of the St. Hebereke High School Rhythmic Gymnastics team... and Ranma-sama is my fiancee. And you are?" Nodoka smiled tightly. "I am Saotome Nodoka... Ranma's mother." Kodachi's face came alive as she flowed into the room, holding out a bouquet of black roses. "Oh! Please accept--" Ukyou bounced up and in one motion whipped loose her fighting spatula and splatted Kodachi back into the yard. The Black Rose of St. Hebereke Girls School lay untidily, dark rose petals fluttering slowly to the ground around her. "Got her," said Ukyou in a satisfied voice. Nodoka stared in shock. "Why... why did you do that to that poor girl? Ukyou-chan?" Kodachi stirred and appeared to try to sit up, but a cloud of gas erupted from the flowers lying on the ground next to her and in moments she was again lying still. Ranma grunted. "Paralysis gas again," he said disinterestedly. "Maybe it's sleeping gas for a change," said Nabiki brightly. Ukyou smiled as she sat down again, nodding to the still- shocked Nodoka. "Well, at least she won't be bothering us for a little while." "What an odd girl," said Nodoka, her shock turning into bemusement. Then her expression hardened into a frown, which she directed at her son. "Did she say... did she say she was *another* fiancee, Ranma?" Ranma snorted, shaking his head sharply. "She's just a crazy with an infatuation. She's caused trouble before. She keeps trying to gas me and drag me off." Nodoka looked at Ranma disbelievingly, but both Akane and Ukyou nodded. "She's a real pest," said Akane savagely, "just like her brother." 'Just like a certain pig,' she added to herself. "I see," said Nodoka evenly. "I'm glad to hear that you haven't accumulated any *more* fiancees, son," she added with a hint of irony. "I'll take her upstairs," said Ranma. "We can take her home when we take Shampoo home later." Suiting action to words, he got up and stepped outside to pick up Kodachi. "Would anyone like some more tea?" asked Kasumi brightly. By the time Ranma returned, more tea had been served and Nodoka was again preparing to ask Ukyou some direct questions. She shifted her shoulders, settling more comfortably onto her heels. She took a deep breath to start again the questions she had been about to ask before Kodachi had interrupted. "Ukyou-chan," she began, "I must confess that I had an ulterior motive in inviting you here this evening. Please forgive me for not informing you earlier." Ukyou smiled to cover her suddenly nervousness. She was sure that Ranchan would be hers, but... Ranma had been very nice to her tonight, almost *too* nice, and Akane hadn't hit him once. Not once. If fact, she was smiling too, a smile that would be more at home on a shark... or her sister Nabiki. "That's quite all right, Nodoka-san," she said. "Please, what is it that I can do for you?" Nodoka's expression was grave. She was about to speak when the shoji nearest the bathroom was ripped open to reveal a freshly-bathed-looking Ryouga. "Waaalll, if it ain't the pig boy," drawled Ranma. Ryouga flashed him a look but otherwise ignored his enemy, concentrating instead on his darling Akane-san. He dropped to his knees next to her (and also next to Ranma), his knees almost between the two, and grabbed one of her hands in both of his. Grasping his courage firmly in both mental hands, he looked her in the eyes and spoke. "A-Akane-san! I... I..." "Leave her alone, pig-boy!" snarled Ranma. Akane swung her free fist into Ranma's shoulder. "Let him speak!" she said. "I want to know what Ryouga-kun has to say." Ranma stared at Akane in amazement. What had happened to their declarations of love? Could she actually be serious? Doubt filled him, but he decided to trust her. After what she had done this morning, waking him with a kiss after his proposal the previous night, he could not imagine that she would abandon him so easily. This must be an act, he told himself. He decided to sit back and watch, and see what Akane had planned. But, he pledged to himself, if Ryouga actually managed to have his way with her then there would be blood spilled. Noting that Ranma was apparently not going to make an issue of her desire to talk with Ryouga, Akane turned back to the Lost Boy. She smiled at Ryouga gently, not resisting his grip, and tilted her head enquiringly. "What is it, Ryouga-kun?" she asked softly. Her smile, her musical voice made Ryouga feel dizzy. She was receptive to him! Yes, he would succeed! Thus encouraged, he dove in. "I... I l-love you! I've loved you for almost a year now, ever since I first saw you, and I always will! Do yourself a favour and dissolve your engagement to this honourless cur -- I'm sure Nabiki or Kasumi will satisfy the family honour with Ranma! I am yours, Akane! Tell me... tell me that you love me!" The silence at the table was absolute. Nabiki eyed Akane nervously, knowing how she had reacted earlier that afternoon when she had first told her about Ryouga's curse. She was very disturbed to see that Akane was... smiling at Ryouga sweetly. Ukyou's reaction was predictable if somewhat incongrous given the atmosphere in the room. She clenched one fist and a triumphant look briefly crossed her face. "Yosh!" she breathed to herself joyously. 'Way to go, Ryouga!' she added to herself. Ranma, too, reacted predictably. "Why you...!" "Shut up, Ranma!" Akane looked him in the eye, not taking her hand from Ryouga's. He was surprised to see a great anger in her eyes for a moment before she returned a saccharine smile to her face. He frowned. What was happening here? Ryouga didn't notice the quick play of expressions across her face; his heart was thumping in his chest and her face disappearing into a starry haze as he waited for her reply. "Oh, Ryouga-kun," she trilled happily. Ryouga looked ecstatic, and Akane savoured her revenge. This was even better than she'd hoped for... to have him step so willingly into her trap, it was as though it had been fated to happen. She leaned towards Ryouga and put her head on his shoulder. "Oh, Ryouga- kun. I've been waiting for you so long to say that." Nodoka turned her gaze to Akane at her daughter-in-law-to- be's apparent change of heart, a slight frown making her expression thoughtful, evaluating. Ryouga's heart soared. Yes! He knew that Akane would be his! She loved him, not that bastard Ranma. Tears of joy started to leak from his eyes, and he revelled in the feel of her delicate hand in his. Visions of happy family life rose in his head, lifting his heart in gladness and triumph. "I-I've wanted so say it for so long," he said again. "I love you." A thought occurred to him... why not go for the gold? Against an unbearable tension in his chest, he blurted out, "P- please say you will m-marry me?" Akane looked at him in amazement, a pleased expression on her face. Ryouga, watching her face, knew in his heart that she would say yes. Take that, Ranma! "Ryouga-kun... I had no idea that you felt that way about me," she said happily. "Do you really want to marry me?" "With all my heart!" Akane squeezed briefly with her hand before sitting up again and pulling it free from his grip. She reached past Ryouga to grab Ranma's hand. "But Ryouga... I'm afraid I love Ranma, not you. I *do* hope you understand that I could never love, let alone marry, a low-life, honourless, lying, sukebe pig such as yourself." Her voice dripped honey, all lovey-dovey. "Why don't you go and find a nice lady pig to make some bacon with instead?" She smiled sweetly at him again and waited for her words to take effect. Kasumi gasped, shocked at her sister's language. "Akane!!" Nodoka's eyes grew wide, while Nabiki smiled gently, shaking her head just a little in bemusement. Ryouga continued to gaze star-struck at Akane for a long moment, devotion shining from his face... until her words struck home. Like a sledgehammer, they bashed at his fragile heart. "What... what are you talking about? I'm not--" "I know that you're P-chan, Ryouga," snarled Akane, her face suddenly ugly. "You've been sleeping in my *bed*, listening to my secrets, taking advantage of me, pretending to be my pet! You've even watched me *change*! Well this is the end of it! I never want to see you again!! Ever!!!" Ryouga's mind went into free-fall as his heart shattered like glass. He felt hollow, helpless, utterly depressed. He squeezed his eyes shut as Akane's bitter words echoed inside him. He recalled Ranma's accusations that his behaviour was wrong, sleeping with Akane as P-chan. He had ignored him, of course. Why would an enemy point down the correct path? Inside his head, he wailed. 'Why did I do it? Was I mad?! It's all my fault, it's all my fault...' But another part of his mind sang to him, opening his eyes to gaze into Ranma's surprised face. Suddenly, conviction filled him. "Raannnmaaa!" he growled, his fingers curling into hooks, his forearms starting to glow with the yellow energy of his ki. "This is all your fault!! You told her!" He tensed to attack, even as Ranma scrambled to defend himself and, automatically, to ensure no harm came to Akane. "Wait!" Soun's voice cracked like a whip. His anger derailed, Ryouga stared at the ineffectual head of the Tendou clan in amazement. With his aura visible, giving him massive presence and power, he did not appear ineffectual now... oh, no, not at all. Ryouga felt pinned by Soun's aura as he spoke with a huge, passionate dignity. "Ryouga-kun... I have been waiting for some time for my daughter to realise what was going on," Soun said firmly. "Further, I agree with everything she has said. By persisting in your deception so long, young man, you have thoroughly dishonoured yourself. You are not fit to associate with us." "But-but it's all Ranma's faul--" Soun held up a majestic hand, cutting Ryouga off in mid- word. "I disagree. It is most certainly all *your* fault. I believe that *you* are the one dishonoured by failing to appear at the appointed time for your challenge with Ranma. When you appeared late, you called him coward for not appearing and decided to follow him to China. When he brushed past you on the trail, you were unable to even keep your balance. Later, when you located Ranma in your vendetta against him, you attacked without warning and refused when asked to state the reason for your challenge. Since then, you have many times pledged Ranma's death in this pointless vendetta." Soun closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "For one who professes honour to act in such a way is... unbelievable," he went on firmly, shaking his head. "To attempt to blame others for one's own faults is a dishonour. To lie is a dishonour. To take advantage of my daughter in the way you have..." He raised an arm and pointed to the door. "Go. I have tolerated you and your ways for so long for Akane's sake. Now that she has rejected you... You are no longer welcome in this house, Hibiki Ryouga. Never darken our door again." Ryouga turned to Akane, who was looking at him with contempt from the protection of Ranma's arms. Ranma's expression was unreadable... pitying, he decided eventually. Suddenly the urge to fight left him and he hung his head, arms dangling limply. Slowly he got up and without a word he walked out through the open door into the garden. Everyone watched him go. At the edge of the pool of light that was cast from the living room, he turned, his body lit but his face in shadow. "Wakare, Akane-san. S'... s'ki da." And then he was gone. There was a long silence. Finally, Ranma spoke. "I hope he's going to be okay," he said. Akane frowned at Ranma, anger at Ryouga's perfidy still burning within her. "Who cares?" she asked, turning within his arms to turn her face to him. "Aw, c'mon Akane, you don't really mean that do you?" Akane glared at him, but she couldn't keep it up and eventually let out her breath in a big sigh. "No, I guess not." Nodoka smiled at her son, pleased. This last act, after so many tonight, finally convinced her. Her son was *so* manly, to him it came as naturally as breathing... despite being raised by his father. Despite his many flaws, her pride for him filled her soul. Watching the interplay between Ranma, Akane, and Ukyou tonight had been very illuminating, and the interruptions paradoxically had given her an opportunity to think about what she had been seeing. Ukyou obviously loved her son very deeply, and just as obviously Ranma didn't return that love, although he genuinely liked her and called her his best friend. She felt a strong pity for the girl, even though she knew that such a feeling would only make the final settlement, when the time came, all the harder. Ukyou was still looking out at the darkness outside, her eyes sad, but even though her heart was breaking she said nothing. She was thinking about Ryouga, and whether he would be okay... and about what Akane had said, the way Ranma was holding her comfortably, and how she was resting in his arms as though it was the most natural thing in the world, with none of their usual embarrassment or harsh words. Akane had admitted that she loved Ranma. Ranma was holding her, was looking around automatically, defensively, in an automatic pattern that announced clearly to anyone who had eyes to see that Akane was under his protection... and when his eyes met hers, they were not defensive, but... challenging, she decided. And maybe pitying, too. Unable to stop herself, Ukyou leaned forward, crossing her arms across her chest and grabbing her shoulders to ease the pain. Warmth on her cheeks told of tears flowing form her eyes, and she was dismayed at her lack of control as she watched teardrops splash on the tatami beneath her. Nodoka may say that no final choice had yet been made, but she knew then that she had lost the battle for Ranma's heart. Why, then, should she continue? Eventually, she told herself, she would to be asked to give up the engagement to her Ran-chan, be offered reparations, something... anything but what she wanted the most, marriage to her Ran-chan. But if he didn't love her, then why try for a hollow victory? She had briefly thought that Ryouga had gotten off lightly... but now she knew that the knife Akane had used on him was far, far crueler than her mallet, for a similar one was even now cutting her heart from her chest. Poor Ryouga-chan. She hoped he wouldn't do anything stupid. Somebody else was crying, echoing her heart. It was... Soun? Akane's father was crying gently, with dignity, not wailing as he had so often done recently. Kasumi noticed too. "What's wrong, otousan?" Soun looked at his eldest daughter and managed a tremulous half-smile. "Akane will marry Ranma-kun, and the line -- and the Musabetsu Kakutou Ryuu -- will continue. Look at them, Kasumi, look at them! I'm so happy!" Something about Soun's words stirred Ukyou. Don't give up, she told herself. She could not believe that so fundamental a change had been made in the relationship between Ranma and Akane in a few short days. The time when they had pretended to be married, when she had thought that Ranma was carrying though on his childhood promise to care for her the rest of her life during that debacle with the special okonomiyake sauce she had made as a child, rose within her mind. Time had gone by since then, time for the two of them to learn to act, to learn how better to fool her... It was all a sham, she realised suddenly. It had to be. Ran-chan could not possibly love Akane, who regularly, unfairly bashed him, failed to trust him, and accused him of perversion and infidelity and other unspeakable things. How could he possibly love the Tendou girl, who treated him so poorly, when there was one who loved him truly and with whom he got along so well? His acknowledged best friend? Ukyou looked at the two again, and felt her competitive spirit rise within her. The game could be won. A glance at Nodoka showed that she was watching the three of them with a thoughtful expression on her face... undecided, she told herself hopefully. She leaned over against Ranma again, latching onto his arm, holding it against the side of her breast. He looked at her nervously, but didn't say anything. "Ukyou-san," Nodoka said. She paused a moment before continuing with a sympathetic but firm expression. "Ukyou-chan, perhaps I could ask you some questions about your life? I am sorry to do this, but there are certain things I must know before a final decision is made." Ukyou's heart rose even more. Nodoka's utterance confirmed her logic... so much the better! She felt the prize within coming within her grasp. She nodded gravely, then smiled at Ranma. "I don't mind. I can do anything if my Ran-chan supports me." The main gate crashed open, and the sound of running feet was audible in the sudden cessation of the cicadas' song. Everyone turned their attention to the garden. There were rapid steps, and then Kunou stormed onto the verandah skirting the living room carrying two bunches of red roses. "Well hello, Kunou-chan," drawled Nabiki. "What can we do for *you*?" Kunou glared at his classmate. "Be though quiet, Tendou Nabiki. I didn't come here to speak with *you*." "So what took you so long? Kodachi was here a *long* time ago. Is she more dedicated than you in her pursuit of her fantasies?" Her voice was sharp, now, baiting him. Kunou stood before Nabiki, his attention solely on her. "I prefer the dignified pace of the samurai, not the frenetic, undignified roof-hopping of my sister. But enough! I came to speak with your sister, the beauteous Akane, and the Osage-no- onna whom I have often found to be here!" Brandishing the bouquets, he quickly scanned the room, his gaze settling on his beloved Akane. Impulsively, driven by the impact of seeing her after a whole week's absence, he threw himself to his knees before his goddess and thrust one of the bouquets at her. "O beauteous Akane, thou who walks with a tigress' grace and is possessed of the beauty of ages, how mine heart doth ache to be with thee! I can see that thy wonderful face doth perfectly mirror thy feelings for me. Be not surprised that I returned after terrible trials and an unendurable period of solitude to be by thy side and to date thee; nor should thou be angry that I have not returned before this so that we could date, for I have fought against a full legion of monsters from darkest nightmares to be with thee tonight, for I know that your innermost desire is to spend thy time in my exalted company. I would climb any mountain, swim any sea, defeat any foe to--" "Can it, Kunou-*senpai*!" said Ranma as he shoved the sole of his foot into Kunou's face. Akane sat up and leaned forward in indignation. Ukyou found herself becoming angry at Kunou's presumption and watched him, eyes narrow, seething. "Excuse me," said Nodoka, but she was ignored. Kunou, a footprint decorating his face, stood and levelled his bokutou at Ranma. "Be thou quiet, foul sorcerer Ranma, and release the beauteous Akane and the red-haired goddess Osage-no- onna from the grip of thy spell. Let them be free, I say, even as I have won my freedom from--!" In a blur of movement, Ranma knocked the end of the boktou in such a way as to knock it from Kunou's grasp. It landed untidily on the tatami of the living room, making a dull thudding noise. Ranma smirked at Kunou's clumsiness. Kunou stared at him in shock, drawing in breath to begin a fresh tirade. "Excuse me!" said Nodoka with a sharp voice. "Who may you be, young man, and pray tell me why you have interrupted us so?" Kunou flicked his gaze to Nodoka, scooping up his fallen bokutou again automatically. "Who are you to ask me such a question?" he said with a haughty glare. "But no! It is polite to give one's own name first!" he added as Nodoka began to answer, overriding her. His voice deepened and he spoke sternly, in formal cadences. "I am the rising star of Fuurinkan High School Kendou Club, its captain, undefeated by anybody in the school. Descended from samurai stock, counting my descent to both the Shogunate and the Imperial Family, I am Kunou Tatewaki, the Blue Thunder!" He struck a heroic pose for a long moment, then relaxed and began to speak normally again. "And I am here to date Tendou Akane and Osage-no-onna, she who sometimes calls herself Saotome Ranma. I burn for them both, and it is my right to have them... mine and no other's." Nodoka looked at Kunou like he was some kind of lower form of life; Soun was livid. Anger burned within Ukyou, an uncontrollable, acid burn, seeking an outlet. How dare he! How dare that *worm* dare to insult Ran-chan so?! "Don't you think they might be a bit much for you to handle, Kunou-chan?" asked Nabiki tauntingly. Nodoka ignored Nabiki's interruption and frowned sternly at Kunou. "I am Saotome Nodoka, Ranma's mother. You say that this person you call Osage-no-onna calls herself Saotome Ranma?" "She sometimes calls herself Saotome Ran*ko*," he allowed after considering the question for a moment. Nodoka's expression hardened. "I am terribly sorry, Kunou- san, but all three of Tendou Akane, Saotome Ranma, and Saotome Ranko are already engaged. I am mother to both Ranma and Ranko. You may not date them." Her tone was iron. Iron which shattered against the adamantine walls of Kunou's preconceptions. "That sham engagement to the sorcerer Saotome Ranma is no engagement at all! I forbid it! Only *I* have the right to date Tendou Akane!" Then he frowned. "*Which* Saotome Ranma are you mother to?" "Who died and appointed *you* God, Kunou?" sneered Ranma. "Shut up, you wretch! Have you no manners?! I am talking to this misguided woman! I will allow you to lose to my superior skills in the fighting arts later." In spite of herself, Ukyou sniggered, shocked out of her deep anger by the outrageous statement. Kunou was being even more obtuse than usual, and she was looking forward to seeing either Ranma or Nodoka chew him up and spit him out. "Superior to what? A mouse? A goose? A horse? A deer? And how dare you refer to my mother as a misguided woman, like she's some servant of yours?!" Ranma stood and snorted angrily, his eyes contemptuous. "And I wouldn't have thought that even you would stoop to lying about a matter of honour, Kunou. You know full well that I've defeated you at least ten times in formal challenges despite your *best* efforts. All have been at your behest. Do you refuse to acknowledge the result of those challenges, Kunou-*senpai*?" Akane glanced at Ranma, an inkling of his plan coming to her. He must have been inspired by his mother, she thought... normally he would have long since started pounding on Kunou. "I have never been honestly defeated," sneered Kunou. "Not by you or anyone else." Something snapped in Ukyou. "You unbelievable liar!" she yelled, surging to her feet, her fighting spatula in her hands. Every bit of her earlier anger returned full-force. Kunou's eyes widened. "You insult me unforgivably," he said in a low voice. "Do you challenge me, then, Kuonji Ukyou?" "I do! I challenge you, before witnesses! If you lose, you will forever forsake any claim or desire to both Tendou Akane and the girl you call Osage-no-onna!" 'Now why did I say that?' Ukyou asked herself, for the moment a passenger in her own body. "And let's hope you follow the result of the challenge more closely than your sister did," added Nabiki with a sneer. "You're pathetic, Kunou-chan." Kunou glared at Nabiki, then, enraged, spun to face Ukyou. "Very well! It shall be as you say! Now?" "In the dojo, please," said Nodoka. Everybody went over to the dojo, except for Kasumi who stayed behind in the house to do some cleaning up. The two combatants faced off in the middle of the dojo, taking stance against each other, their weapons at the ready. Kunou held his bokutou loosely, his expression a confident sneer, whereas Ukyou was vibratingly ready in every fibre of her body, her anger at Kunou's unbelievable presumption and hypocrisy lending her seemingly unlimited energy. Adrenaline surged through her system, making time pass more slowly. "The bout ends when one of you is rendered unconscious or when one resigns," said Soun. "Begin!" For a long moment nothing happened, then Kunou struck with a quick straight blow to Ukyou's head. She parried with her spatula's handle and sent a viscious risposte using the side of the spatula edgewise into his hips and thighs. Kunou grunted, and was amazed to find his weapon momentarily trapped in the loop at the end of the spatula. Quickly he jerked it free, but now Ukyou had the initiative. She attacked him furiously, Kunou only just managing to block her furious attacks. Finally the approaching wall interrupted Ukyou's rhythm, and Kunou took advantage of the momentary break in her offence... and slammed a blow into her ribs. He was not holding back anything, and three ribs snapped under the power of the blow. But in going for the blow, which he hoped would disable her and force her to resign, Kunou exposed his head... and was promptly pounded to the floor by the flat of the spatula blade. "That didn't hurt, you know," he mumbled before going limp. The tableau held for a long moment before Soun said firmly, "Wait!" In a more normal voice, he continued, "The bout is concluded. I pronounce Kunoji Ukyou the winner." Ukyou relaxed, her skin going gray with pain, but relief was the dominant expression on her face. Akane and Ranma ran up to her. "Thank you, Ukyou," said Akane. "Yes, th--" "Violent-girl die!!" "Ohohohohoho! Return my Ranma-sama, Tendou Akane!!" Akane and Ranma traded a look, and Ranma leaped forward to meet Shampoo. Shampoo changed her attack to become a glomp, but Ranma ducked under her enclosing arms, gave her a push to spin her around, and poked her sleep spot. He turned to see that Akane was holding her own against Kodachi, with Ukyou struggling against the pain of her ribs to lift her spatula. He skipped behind Akane and spoke into her ear. "Can I help you?" he asked her. Akane nodded briefly, and moments later Kodachi was lying on the floor next to her elder brother. There was a long pause, while everybody except Nodoka waited for somebody else to show up and add to the mayhem. Ukyou knelt on the dojo floor, her breath coming in short gasps and her face now white as she struggled against the pain of her smashed ribs. Nodoka looked at the three unconscious teenagers lying on the floor. "My, what interesting friends you two have," she said at last. * * * The hospital waiting room was an awkward combination of the sterile cleanliness of harsh light, white paint and stainless steel, and the homely well-used comfort of an old shoe. The vinyl-covered chairs had seen many people over the years, traffic which showed in the worn corners of the cushions and arms and in the soft spot in the middle of each chair's seat, and in the welcoming tattiness of well-thumbed magazines waiting in neat piles on side tables for yet another reader to pick them up. The sole occupants, Ranma, Akane, and Nodoka sat in one corner of the room, the two teenagers somewhat apart from Ranma's mother. Akane leaned against Ranma, showing her affection without violating public mores. They were talking quietly. "Thank you for letting me help you with Kodachi," he said. "I could have taken her," she replied a little defensively. Ranma nodded. "I agree." Akane looked at Ranma in surprise. "You agree?" "Sure, you could have taken her, easily I think. It's just that I was free and I didn't want to risk you getting needlessly hurt," he said to her with a lopsided smile. She smiled back at him and put her head on his chest. "That's nice." She curled a hand around his arm, hugging it to her. "I'm glad Ukyou's going to be okay," said Akane. Ranma nodded, frowning a little in concern. "So am I," he said. "She's lucky, I think." "So are we, Ranma. She's a good person." She snuggled for a bit, then added, "What are we going to do about her?" Ranma's looked a little lost. "I... I don't know, Akane. I hope we can..." His voice trailed off, not wanting to arouse Akane's ire. She pushed his shoulder in a gentle punch. "I know how you feel about her, baka. I know you'd like to keep her as a friend, and... I guess I'd like to have her as a friend, too. Do you think that's going to be possible?" Ranma shrugged gently so as not to disturb Akane. "Dunno," he said. "I hope so." Nodoka looked up from the magazine she'd been trying to read and smiled at her son reassuringly for a moment. The waiting room fell quiet as the two teenagers sat thinking about the day's events. After a time of snuggling with Ranma, Akane said, "Poor Ryouga. He's such a fool." Ranma grunted. "I know I wouldn't like to be on the receiving end of what you did to him." "He deserved it!" "I agree. I just hope *I* never do anything to deserve that kind of treatment." He gave a shudder. There was silence again for a time, then Akane spoke again. "It's been a big day, hasn't it?" Ranma nodded and grunted affirmatively. "I hope we can get things settled soon," he added. "I want to spend some time getting to know my fiancee." "Oh, Ranma!" she said as she squeezed his ribs gently. "I'd like that." He remembered something that had happened earlier. "When you came into the dojo this afternoon, I was going to ask you if you wanted to go on a training trip. Just you and me, no distractions; we can train with nobody to disturb us. We'll leave mom and dad at home; maybe they can get to know each other again themselves." He frowned, looking worried, and spoke directly into her ear in a low murmur. "I... I wonder if they'll stay together, Akane. Mother doesn't seem to... doesn't seem to like dad very much any more." He leaned forward and hugged his knees to his chest, looking off into the middle distance. Akane watched Ranma for a long moment. He seemed to be worried and sad. Why, she wondered? He certainly didn't seem to like his father very much, and why should their breakup worry him? Suddenly a lightbulb went on in her mind, and she leaned against his shoulder again, her arm going around his back in a reassuring hug. "Don't worry, Ranma," she replied, murmuring into his ear in reply. "I'd like to think we can be better to our children than your -- our -- parents have been." Ranma turned his head to her, his eyes wide. She had speared his concern exactly, and in the same sentence made it recede into nothingness. His surprise settled into a loving feeling as the implications of her statement came to him, and he let go his knees and slipped his arms about Akane, letting the motion push her arms about his neck. "Thank you," he said before kissing her. Nodoka watched the pair out of the corner of her eyes as they briefly kissed and then went back to their previous pose lest anyone come in and catch them in an embarrassing position. Seeing that they were not likely to repeat the move for the moment at least, she turned her attention back to the magazine, seeing it without reading it. She was unable to read the characters; they kept blurring as silent tears filled her eyes. Her hearing was very good, and she had heard what the two had said in the near-total silence of the waiting room this late at night. Ranma's comment, and Akane's reply, had both cut like a tanto at her heart. She wondered how her family had come to this pass. Years ago, she had loved Genma dearly, but she had stupidly allowed him to take her son -- and himself -- away from her. Why? Why had he felt it necessary to do that? And how had she been stupid enough to *let* him? And now, Genma had done things for which it would be difficult indeed to forgive him. He had made it all but impossible for Ranma to live out his dream by almost sacrificing his son's and the family's honour through his stupidity, to say nothing of limiting his son's options by ensuring his education was irregular indeed. How could she not have seen this all those years ago? She wondered as the tears fell, whether it would be necessary to have Genma commit seppuku, and why it was that despite all he had done, despite all his demonstrated faults, the thought made her heart ache. * * * "How do you feel, Ucchan?" Ukyou snorted then went pale. "It only hurts when I laugh," she said after a long pause, her smile thin and strained. "It reminds me of that boys' school." "Boys' school?" asked Akane, surprised at the apparent non- sequitir. "Breast bindings," said Ukyou, breathing shallowly. "And lunchtimes." "Eh?" Ranma smiled. "Remember what I told you about my bread feud with Ryouga?" he asked Akane tolerantly. "Oh. Yes." Ukyou and Ranma shared a grin of common experience before an ill-advised movement made her catch her breath and turn pale again." The doctor stepped forward. "That's enough, I think," he said. "She needs to sleep. I must ask you to leave now." "I am very sorry that I never got to ask you this evening about your past, Ukyou-chan," said Nodoka with a regretful smile. "May I visit tomorrow to talk with you?" Her smile became more genuine. "Perhaps you can tell me why you went to a boys' school, for you are certainly no boy." * * * A full moon shone down on a forest clearing. In the middle of the clearing, Ryouga dug vigorously with a camp spade in a deepish pit. He laughed to himself as he worked. "Just you wait, Ranma!" he chuckled to himself gleefully as he attacked the damp soil as though it was his enemy's body. "This'll be the best grave ever, and it's all yours!" An image of Akane crossed his mind, and Ryouga dropped his spade and gazed up at the moon imploringly, fist clenched by his chest, and he visualised holding a willing Akane in his arms. Behind them was a mound of freshly-turned earth with a sign which said, "Here lies Ranma." 'Akane, I finally got rid of Ranma!' he said to her fervently in his dream. She replied to him lovingly, 'Now I can finally be yours!' His vision finished and he let out a sigh of longing. He had just picked up the spade to resume digging when Ranma, in female form, bounced into the deep pit and grabbed Ryouga in a hug. "Love. You," she said, eyes shining as she gazed up at his startled face. "Um... ah..." She wriggled excitedly against his firm, muscular body, her love for him filling her. "We're all alone now, you know," she said as she moved her arms to around Ryouga's neck. Ryouga, filled with revulsion, was unable to reply. Ranma smiled sexily. "We're in the middle of an uninhabited forest." She tightened the hug, pressing her breasts sensuously against his chest. Her nipples were hard, and the sensation of them being pressed in by his warm, strong body drove her to boldness. "No matter how you scream, or cry, or shout, no-one can hear you." She moved her head in for a kiss. Ryouga jerked himself free and bashed Ranma-onna over the head with his spade. "Hey!" he shouted angrily at the prone Ranma. "I'm supposed to say that!" Clenching his fist, he looked down at Ranma as she collected herself from the muddy floor of the pit, his eyes pitiless. "Ranma... prepare to die." Devastated, unable to believe the depth of his rejection, Ranma-onna knelt in front of her love and clasped her hands in front of her. "Do you really hate me?" she asked in a small voice. "To tell you the truth," he said harshly, "I never liked you in the first place." The cracking of his knuckles was loud in the silence of the forest. His eyes glowed, the position of his arms with his hands held together at chest height emphasising the obvious power of his chest and shoulders. Ranma lowered her hands and looked up at him, her eyes large azure pools. "If I die," she said in a quiet voice, "will you be happy?" "Uh?" Ranma read his face for a long moment, then turned away from him, still on her knees. Still in that quiet voice, she said, "I understand." She closed her eyes and tilted her head forward. "Go ahead and kill me, then." "Ra... Ranma?" She looked up at the full moon, eyes shining. "I'll do anything for you. Anything... Even die..." She continued to gaze at the moon for a long moment, filling her heart with its beauty, then closed her eyes again and tilted her head forward, stretching her neck for her love, waiting for the end to come. She prayed it would be quick. She brought her hands up in front of her face in an attitude of prayer and made her last wish, silent tears leaking from her eyes as she readied her soul for death. For what seemed like a very long time, nothing happened. Then there was a rustle of cloth, an intake of breath, and then Ryouga yelled, beginning his kiai... "IYAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Panting, the sweat like ice on his clammy skin, Ranma-otoko sat bolt upright in his bed. As the dream faded from his mind, he slumped forward, arms resting on his knees. The door was flung open and Akane landed on the floor next to him. "Ranma! Are you all right? You screamed...." Ranma sat upright again and looked at Akane, seeing her eyes filled with concern and love, so much like his own in the dream. Shuddering, he closed his eyes and grabbed her in a hug. The light cotton of her nightie formed creases beneath his arms. Her arms went around his ribs in response, warm through his light cotton top. "Was it a dream?" she asked. Rapid footsteps announced Nabiki's arrival. He nodded. "It was Ryouga... that magic fishing rod..." Akane frowned. "You mean that fishing rod that made you fall in love with him?" Ranma shuddered, but nodded. "Ryouga had dug my grave, and I was saying that if killing me would make him happy, then he should do so!" Eyes squeezed shut, he shook his head in a no-no- no motion. "I stretched my neck for him!" Akane was filled with relief. "Oh, so it was only a bad dream! I'd feel horrible if that had actually happened." Ranma jerked in her arms, and she looked at him in surprise. He was staring at her in disbelief. Then he removed his arms from around her, placing his hands on her shoulders and looking her directly in the eyes. "Akane... it did happen," he said sincerely. "Just before you found... us." He shuddered again at the memory; he had been playing with Ryouga at the time, love for him filling his heart, jumping around and laughing in the moonlight, celebrating that Ryouga hadn't killed him so he must love him after all.... He heard a gasp, and Akane's arms tightened convulsively. "What?! You... you nearly let him k-kill you?" "Yes," he said softly against the tightness of what had almost been. Ranma was amazed to feel a warm hand lay on his back. He turned his head and saw that it was Nabiki, whose arrival he had distantly registered but not really noticed, looking at him with sympathy in her eyes. She was kneeling next to Akane, half- behind him at the head of his futon. Her eyes shimmered, but her smile was gentle. "It's okay, Ranma," she said quietly. "I don't think that's likely to happen again." Akane smiled gratefully at her sister. "Did he wake you up too, oneechan?" Nabiki nodded, leaving her hand on the corded complexity of the muscles of Ranma's upper back. "You were pretty loud, Ranma. I was afraid Ryouga might have come to visit." A chill settled over the room at Nabiki's words. "You just had to mention him, didn't you," groused Ranma. Her hand moved slightly, sending a warm feeling down his spine. "You shouldn't worry about it tonight, Ranma. I want you to get a good night's sleep. You need to be looking your best for tomorrow." "Eh?" "Mouuu... have you forgotten that calendar shoot *already*?" Nabiki asked, exasperated. But her hand moved again, a tingling sensation, sending a rather different message than her words. "What time is it set for, oneechan?" asked Akane. "Eleven o'clock. We'll need to leave at ten." Her hand wiped lightly over Ranma's back, then fell away. "Well, better get back to bed. Coming, Akane?" she asked as she got to her feet. Akane smiled, a slightly naughty thought occurring to her. "Ranma... do you mind if I... I want to..." He looked at his fiancee blankly. "Want to what?" Akane looked down and blushed. "Would you... would you hold me?" Ranma automatically lifted his hand to play with his hair, smiling embarrassedly. After a moment he nodded, and Akane let him go. Nabiki grinned and shook her head, then quickly knelt back down behind Ranma. "Well, I hope you sleep well, little brother," she said as she hugged him from behind, her arms around his shoulders and her body pressed briefly, warmly against his back. Then she got up again and walked to the door of the bedroom. "See you in the morning." "Good night, oneechan," said Akane with a brilliant smile. Ranma just gave a distracted smile as Nabiki quietly closed the door. For a long moment nothing happened. Then Ranma looked to Akane. "Now what?" Akane grinned. "Lie down, Ranma. On your back." Ranma did as he was told, and Akane lay down on her side, using his left shoulder as a pillow. The night was warm, too warm for continuous body contact, but Akane lay her arm across his chest and was soon asleep. For some time Ranma lay there, wondering at the sense of comfort he got from Akane's arm across his chest. 'I wish we'd done this ages ago,' he thought to himself. The feeling reminded him of Nabiki's hand movements, of the sensation of her breasts pressed against his back. He briefly pondered her odd behaviour -- so strangely touchy-feely, so... sexual, he admitted to himself -- but then put it to one side, into a compartment to think about some other time. For now, he concentrated on the warm feeling of Akane's arm across his chest, the scent of her hair, and realised just as sleep came to claim him that he was happy. Anata: "You", formal. However, the Japanese tend not to say "you", usually preferring instead to refer to each other in the third person. Between married (or otherwise close) couples, "anata" means "darling". Hentai: Perverted. Hebereke: Falling-down drunk. "St. Bacchus' Girls' School" isn't a bad translation of the name of Kunou Kodachi's school. Kiai: The yell used by many martial artists as they perform some high-power action is called a "kiai". Its purpose is to focus the mind and body. Mou: An expression of exasperation used by females. Usually translated as "Geez". Musabetsu Kakutou Ryuu: The actual name of the variety of kenpo (karate) practised by the Tendos and the Saotomes. It doesn't translate very well... "Anything-Goes Martial Arts" is as good as any except that "kakutou" specifically implies open-handedness (i.e. no weapons). Red eye: The practice of pulling down the lower eyelid to show the capillaries on its inside surface, thus the name. An insult. Suki: Liking (or affection or love). One way of pledging love is to say something along the lines of "suki da". Suki is normally pronounced "s'ki". Youshi: An expression of exultation, usually. Wakare: Farewell.