Confession

Chapter 1

by Lord Archive

This has some dark and WAFF elements to it.

Characters belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and Viz Communication, and
some other companies. Used without permission. I'll return them,
I can only stand to be hit by a mallet so many times.
*>WHAM<* "Archive no baka!"
Ite!

-----------------------------

Off in a forest, two teenagers were kissing. While that wouldn't 
normally Earth-shattering, a group of people in Nerima would disagree,
considering who the kissers were.

It started innocently enough, with a dare. Unlike the last time that 
challenge had been issued, there was no one to interfere. So, Ranma 
was kissing Akane while alone on a training trip forced by their 
parents. If they had been at home, or if someone had come with them, 
it would have been very unlikely that this result would've occurred.

Ranma was thoroughly enjoying the kiss. It was a new and wonderful 
experience for him. He was the one to initiate the kiss, Akane wasn't 
trying to inhale him, and no one was going to stop this by hitting 
him.

Akane could tell Ranma was enjoying their kiss. She was happy about 
that and was enjoying it as well. Even so, part of her mind screamed 
something about him being a pervert.

Akane broke off the kiss. "That was... nice."

"Nice?" Ranma questioned.

"Okay, it was pretty good." Akane looked away uncertainly. "It's 
getting late. We should get some sleep."

Before Ranma could think of something to say, Akane had already 
retreated in to her tent. He stood there looking at the now zipped up 
entrance to her tent, not sure what to make of her reaction. She had 
said she had liked it, but then she just left. Several minutes later, 
Ranma yawned, realizing Akane did have a point and went to his tent.

-----------------------------

"Akane, will you marry me?" Ranma asked with the pride and confidence 
that could possibly call forth the first perfect Moku Takabishi.

"No," Akane said flatly. "Why would I marry someone like you? You 
don't even kiss very well. Ryoga kisses better than you. Isn't that 
right, Ryoga?" She then kissed P-Chan.

"NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!"

Ranma sat up quickly, his breath ragged. "Why would I care if she 
doesn't want to marry me," he lied to himself. He spent the next 
several minutes trying to get himself to believe that. He then heard 
Akane scream. He immediately rushed for her tent and was surprised 
that she was still asleep. She appeared to be in the grips of a rather
nasty nightmare. Ranma shook her, trying to wake her up.

Akane convulsed in Ranma's hands and then let out an ear piercing 
scream. Her eyes shot open and stared blankly at Ranma. <Kill the 
hentai,> was her first thought. But part of her saw that it was Ranma 
that was holding her. She grabbed onto him and started crying.

"I tried. I couldn't stop them. They... They raped me and I couldn't 
do ANYTHING!!" she rushed out.

"It was a dream. Just a dream," Ranma said as calmly as he could.

"It wasn't a dream. It did happen."

"No it didn't. Just a dream."

"Yes, it did! I was almost thirteen and they grabbed me off the street 
and raped me!"

Ranma was frozen in shock as Akane continued to cry into his shoulder.
He wasn't sure if what she said was true or not. 

Eventually, Akane fell asleep, and Ranma then placed her back into her 
sleeping bag. He watched her until she began to stir hours later, and 
then he quickly got out of her tent. He doubted she'd take kindly to 
waking up and seeing him in her tent. She certainly had reacted badly 
whenever he was in her room when she was waking up.

Ranma began to make breakfast while waiting for Akane to exit her 
tent. When she finally did, she wouldn't look at him. They ate 
breakfast in silence.

Ranma wanted to know if what Akane had said last night was true. He 
had hoped that when she woke up, she'd say it was 'just the dream, it 
never happened.' But, Akane didn't do that. She looked withdrawn and 
maybe even a little afraid. He wanted Akane to talk first, but she 
didn't show any sign she was going to start talking anytime soon. 
"Did it really happen?" Ranma finally asked, no longer able to wait.

"You mean our kiss last night?" Akane asked nervously.

"No. Were you raped when you were thirteen?" Ranma cringed internally
at how blunt he was, but he needed to know.

"I wasn't raped when I was thirteen," she replied flatly.

"Akane..." Ranma's voice was filled with conflicting emotions.

Akane sat motionless for a while. She cursed herself. She had hoped 
all of last night was a dream, because she never wanted Ranma to know 
about that terrible night. But he did know now from her confession 
last night. She didn't want to tell him, but he deserved to know. She 
wasn't a virgin, and if she lied now it'd only hurt more if he 
discovered it was true. She curled up into a ball. "I was _almost_ 
thirteen when it happened."  

"Akane... um, how...?" Ranma was at loss for words.

Akane closed her eyes tightly as she began to tell Ranma with a 
shaking voice and a couple tears running down her face.

"Mother died when I was twelve. At the time Daddy practically moved 
into the dojo trying to find release from his pain in the art. Kasumi 
took mother's place, because no one else was available. Nabiki stayed 
in her room and cried. I, however, went everywhere that reminded me of 
my mother. That proved to be the biggest mistake of my life.

"About a month after mom died, I went to the small park a block away 
from home. Mom took me there almost weekly while I was growing up. I 
sat in my favorite swing, and cried. All I wanted at that moment 
was to feel my mother's gentle hands push me in the swing like she 
had done so many time before. But, as much as I wished it, I knew 
she would never be able to push me in that swing again.

"It wasn't until I noticed the street lights turning on that I 
realized how late it was. I knew I had to rush home for dinner, not 
because I was hungry but because I didn't want anyone to worry. So I 
left the park for home...."

Akane's voice suddenly cracked. "I only made it half-way there.... I 
was stopped by two guys. They had to be no older sixteen or seventeen 
at the time. They asked why I was in such a hurry, why I was out so 
late... and asked if I wanted their company that night."

Akane's tears streamed down her face, and her voice was registering on 
the Richter scale. "Of course all I wanted was to go home. But-but... 
they... grabbed me and... carried me..." <Ranma, please don't leave me 
because of this.> "...And when they brought me to a deserted house...
they r-ripped off my c-clothes and... r-r-raped me."

Ranma looked at Akane as she cried into her hands, unable to speak. 
He didn't know what to think. Akane, his fiancee, had been raped as
a child. If he ever found them, he'd kill them... slowly.

Ranma continued to stare at her. Akane wasn't a virgin. She had had 
sex with a guy. True, it was rape, but he wouldn't lose any honor now 
if he refused to marry her. But he did _not_ want to lose this fiancee.

Akane's entire body shook as she cried, and Ranma couldn't take 
seeing her like that. She needed to be comforted somehow. <Maybe I
should hug her.> He approached her, but then got an idea when he 
saw their drinking water.

Minutes later Akane's crying lessened and she realized she'd been 
crying into female Ranma's shoulder, and that Ranma was hugging her. 
"R-Ranma?"

Ranma wasn't sure what to say. "Are you okay now, Akane?"

"Um, I guess. How come you're a girl? I thought you'd react 
differently than this." Akane didn't move from Ranma's embrace.

Ranma took a deep breath. "Well, after what you just said, I thought 
that you might not want to be touched by a guy at the moment... and 
I'm still trying to figure out _how_ I should react. I-I've never had 
to deal with anything like this. All I know is if I ever get my hands
on those bastards that did that to you, they will die."

Akane smiled slightly. "I don't know where they are, and I hope to 
never see them again."

Ranma sighed. "I wish when Dr. Tofu had warned me against trying to 
become intimate with you, he told me why."

"What do you mean Dr. Tofu warned you?" Akane asked, pulling away from
Ranma's embrace.

"Akane, he told me that something in your past had made you angry 
and afraid of intimacy. If I tried to seduce you, you might've tried 
to kill me and it would've killed any chances of us getting married. 
He told me that any, ah, intimacies should be started by you."

"I doubt I would've tried to kill you," Akane muttered.

"What about when I was under the effects of Shampoo's mushrooms? You 
tried to turn me into a pin-cushion with a bow and arrows because I 
hugged you."

"So I over-reacted," Akane said sheepishly. "Why didn't you ask me
about why Dr. Tofu warned you against seducing me?"

"Because Dr. Tofu said that you needed to talk to someone about it, 
but the problem was you had to be the one to start talking about it. 
How many times have you talked about it since it happened?"

Akane looked down and closed her eyes. "Um, once... to the police 
officers and Dr. Tofu. I never even told my family about it, Dr. Tofu 
did. I never felt comfortable enough around anyone in my family to 
talk about it to them. I considered Dr. Tofu, but with the crush I had 
on him before it happened and how helpful he was afterwards, I 
couldn't bring myself to talk about that to him... to remind him I was 
no longer pure and innocent."

"How come you never talked to your family about it?"

Akane sighed and gazed into the campfire. "After it happened, I went 
into the dojo determined that no guy would ever touch me again. Dad 
tried to teach me, but he couldn't bear to look at me. He went into 
his room and started to emotionally break down. I thought for a while 
it was because he was ashamed of me, that he didn't love me anymore. 
I later found out that while he was ashamed, he wasn't ashamed of me, 
but himself since he'd failed to protect both me and my mother.

"Kasumi couldn't believe the world could hold such things as parents 
dying on young children and rapists, so she began her slide into 
obliviousness. One of the reasons I've been so angry with you was 
because with your curse and all the insanity that happened around you, 
it strengthened her retreat from seeing the world as it is.

"Nabiki also looked at the injustice of it all, and went the other 
route. Do onto others before they do it to you. If the world wasn't 
going to be kind to her and her family, she saw no need to be kind to 
the world."

Akane sighed. "Then there was my reaction. I was angry. Angry at the 
world, and angry at myself. How could that happen to me, to anyone?! 
I'm the daughter of a great martial artist, I should've been able to 
defend myself! But it did happen to me, and I never really came to 
terms with it." 

They were silent for a moment, but Ranma wanted to know something.
"Um, how come you wanted to marry me when we got back from China?"

Akane sighed. "I was still recovering from what happened in China. I 
nearly died, and it scared me. I realized either of us could die at 
any time. I didn't want to take the chance of losing you, so I went 
along with Daddy's plan. Because I knew you love me, and don't you 
dare deny it, I would've married you in every way.... Even if I would 
be uncomfortable about some of it."

Ranma smiled a little. "Well, part of the reason I denied it then was 
because I was afraid you weren't ready."

"Oh? What were the rest of the reasons?"

Ranma laughed nervously. "Well, I guess you could say cold feet. 
Anyway, how come you never talked about it to a friend?"

"I did think of telling Sayuri and Yuka, but I doubt they would've 
understood. They were twelve at the time. How are they supposed to 
have a clue what I was going through? Hell, most adults don't have a 
clue about what I went through. Being raped is a violation that words 
can NOT describe. The sheer lack of control, lack of..."

"...Justice, complete wrongness, the tearing of your soul, how you 
feel somehow worthless," Ranma interrupted Akane and continued on.

Akane's eyes widen in shock. "Y-you w-were...."

Ranma turned her head not wanting to look at Akane at that moment. 
"No. I'm actually referring to what I feel sometimes about my curse. 
It robs me of control of my life. It's a terrible punishment onto me 
for a crime of just being somewhere I shouldn't have been. There are 
times I turn into a girl and feel a piece of me has died."

"I-I never thought about your curse that way." Akane looked down at
the ground. "I'm sorry. I should've known better than anyone what 
you were going through, but I refused to think about your problems...
just mine." Her tears once again rolled down her cheeks.

"Akane, it's all right. I understand that you didn't want to face it. 
When Dr. Tofu compared my curse to being raped, I didn't want to face 
my curse. Eventually I was somewhat willing to face my curse," <not 
that I had a choice,> "you weren't willing to face your past yet. I've 
largely come to terms with what I am now, and can help you face your 
past."

Akane smiled. "Thank you, Ranma." She wanted to say more, but words 
seemed inadequate for what she wanted to say.

"How 'bout a little sparrin' match? I'll get your skills up so if 
someone like Pantyhose gets the wrong ideas, you can clobber them,"
Ranma said. <But I'll always be around to make sure no one ever 
touches you that way ever again except me.>

Akane smiled. "I'd like that."

-----------------------

Author's Notes:

When Mrs. Tendo died is, to my knowledge, never stated in the manga
series. (If a reference of 10 years ago is made, that doesn't count
since that means a long time ago.)

The idea is actually an old one that came to me after reading a story 
that it was Kasumi that was raped as a child and told Ranma about it. 
The first thought I had about it was that it was plausible. The second 
thought is that if it happened to anyone in Ranma, it would be Akane. 
It even fits canonical storyline.

In manga vol 10 (11 in Japanese) Shampoo's mushroom story: 
After Kasumi implied Ranma might try to seduce Akane, her watching a 
movie with an implied date rape scene, and Ranma hugging her- Akane 
tried to pound Ranma into paste with a mallet and a shinai and to turn 
him into a pin cushion with a bow and arrows (a bit excessive if you 
ask me).

Numerous other times Akane overreacts to Ranma appearing overly 
amorous. Such as Ranma sneaking into her room to deal with P-Chan.

The real reason why Akane hates boys, with only Dr. Tofu as the 
exception when Ranma arrives.

Why Akane seems to be more comfortable around female Ranma.

Why Akane thrashes around at night.

Why Soun still tried to get Ranma to marry Akane, even after finding 
out Ranma has no honor due to multiple engagements (among other 
things). 

Why does she trust Ryoga? Because besides trying to kill Ranma, he's
always tried to protect her and has not tried to make a move on her
of his own accord. (That's Akane's POV not the readers'.) Her refusal
to see him otherwise shows a possible defense mechanism.

Why did she consider falling in love with Shinnosuke? Because it was
her fault he was dying. The shame of being responsible for someone's
death out-weighed the shame of being raped. Also, given his weakened 
state and imminent death [or so she thought], she would be unlikely to 
have to "perform" more than once, if that.

What about the Battle Dougi? First off while the suit implies it can 
only be used by a virgin, but that isn't how it's stated. Ranma was 
suppose to seduce Akane to show she's in love with someone else. 
Prior sexual knowledge without love, may not trigger 'Dou-chan's'
jealousy. Second, Ranma wanted to get rid of the Dougi, so he sort
of forgot Dr. Tofu's warning about seducing Akane. (The Dougi is
a magical, intelligent battlesuit with near Happosai level 
perversion and it makes Akane stronger than Ranma when worn. The two
means to defeat the Dougi wearer (who must be female) is to either 
hit the yin-yang button or that the owner's heart obviously belongs
to someone else.)