Confession by Lord Archive This is a dark story. Characters belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and Viz Communication, and some other companies. Used without permission. I'll return them, I can only stand to be hit by a mallet so many times. *>WHAM<* "Archive no baka!" Ite! ----------------------------- Ranma sighed. He glanced at his strangely withdrawn fiancee. Akane was lost in thought as she trudged up the mountain along side her fiance. She knew very well what her father hoped they do during this trip, but she really doubted she could go through with THAT. She knew of an obstacle that existed between her and being that close to Ranma, that Ranma didn't know. She sighed, realizing it's was about time he did know. Alone in the woods would be the best place to tell him... She hoped. They found a good place to set up camp. Much to Ranma's surprise, and complete lack of hiding his elation, Akane didn't protest against him cooking dinner. More surprisingly she didn't get upset once. They sat through a silent dinner. Ranma may not be the most observant person, but he did notice something was bothering Akane. "Hey, what have ya done with Akane?" "What was that?" Akane asked, confused. "Well, you haven't been yourself since we left, and I'm starting to wonder if you are Akane," Ranma replied with a slight smirk. Akane's lips twitched slightly, whether from amusement or anger, Ranma couldn't tell. She then sighed, saying, "Ranma, there is something I need to tell you. I probably should've told you this a long time ago, but this is something I don't want anyone to know. I REALLY don't want to tell you, but it's something you have to know." Ranma became nervous, unsure of what Akane had to tell him, but also didn't want to. "Akane, if ya don't want to..." "Ranma, please. You have to know this. If there is any hope for us to truly be married, you have to know." Ranma audible gulped. Akane looked away from Ranma, as if afraid to make eye contact now. "Have you ever wondered why I'm so violent, daddy is so emotional, Nabiki so mercenary, and Kasumi so withdrawn?" "Um, yeah," Ranma replied, not sure if he should say more. "You probably think it's because of my mother's death, right?" Akane did not look to see his answer. "That is part of the reason, but that's not entirely the reason. Something else happened shortly after mom died..." Akane closed her eyes tightly as she began to tell Ranma with a shaking voice and a couple tears running down her face. "I was almost thirteen when my mother died. At the time daddy practically moved into the dojo trying to find release from his pain in the art. Kasumi took mother's place, because no one else was available. Nabiki stayed in her room and cried. I, however, went everywhere that I had the fondest memories of my mother. That proved to be the biggest mistake of my life. "About a week after mom died, I went to the small park a block away from home. Mom took me there almost weekly while I was growing up. I sat in the my favorite swing, and cried. All I wanted at that moment was to feel my mother's gentle hand's push me in the swing like she had done so many time before. But, as much as I wished it, I knew she would never be able to push me in that swing again. "It wasn't until I noticed the street lights turning on that I realized how late it was. I knew I had to rush home for dinner, not because I was hungry but because I didn't want anyone to worry. So I left the park for home..." Akane's voice suddenly cracked. "I only made it half-way there... I was stopped by two guys. They had to be no older sixteen or seventeen at the time. They asked why I was in such a hurry, why I was out so late... and asked if I wanted their company that night." Akane's tears streamed down her face, and her voice was registering on the Richter scale. "Of course all I wanted was to go home. But-but... they... grabbed me and... carried me..." "...And when they brought me to a deserted house that was for sale... they r-ripped off my c-cloths and... r-r-raped me." Akane could no longer say anything more through her tears. Minutes later she realized she'd been crying into female Ranma's shoulder, and that Ranma was hugging her. "R-Ranma?" Ranma wasn't sure what to say. "Are you okay now, Akane?" "Um, I guess. How come you're a girl? I thought you'd react differently than this." Akane didn't move from Ranma's embrace. Ranma took a deep breath. "Well, after what you just said, I thought that you might not want to be touched by a guy at the moment... and Dr. Tofu already told me about what happened." "What?!" Akane screamed in shock. "How could he? He's a doctor! He's not suppose to tell anyone about that!!" "Akane, he told me because I'm your fiance. He thought it'd put us at greater risk if he didn't tell me. If I tried to seduce you, you might've tried to kill me and it would've killed any chances of us getting married. He told me that any, ah, intimacies should be started by you." Akane pulled away from Ranma, looking rather upset. "Why didn't you stop me from telling you this if you already knew?!" "Because Dr. Tofu said that you needed to talk to someone about it, but the problem was you had to be the one to start talking about it. How many times have you talked about it since it happened?" Akane looked rather sheepishly for a moment. "Um, once... to the police officers and Dr. Tofu. I never even told my family about it, Dr. Tofu did. I never felt comfortable enough around anyone in my family to talk about it to them. I considered Dr. Tofu, but with the crush I had on him before it happened and how helpful he was afterwards, I couldn't bring myself to talk about that to him... to remind him I was no longer pure and innocent." "How come you never talked to your family about it?" "After it happened, I went into the dojo determined that no guy would ever touch me again. Dad tried to teach me, but he couldn't bear to look at me. He went into his room and started to emotionally break down. I thought for a while it was because he was ashamed of me, that he didn't love me anymore. I later found out that while he was ashamed, he wasn't ashamed of me, but himself since he didn't protect me and about losing my mother. "Kasumi couldn't believe the world could hold such things as parents dying on young children and rapist, so she began her slide into obviousness. One of the reasons I've been so angry with you was because with your curse and all the insanity that happened around you, it strengthen her retreat from seeing the world as it is. "Nabiki also looked at the injustice of it all, and went the other route. Do onto others before they do it to you. If the world wasn't going to be kind to her and her family, she saw no need to be kind to the world." "I've kinda figured that," Ranma said calmly. Akane nodded. "Then there was my reaction. I was angry. Angry at the world, and angry at myself. How could that happen to me, to anyone?! I'm the daughter of a great martial artist, I've should've been able to defend myself! But it did happen to me, and I never really come to terms with it. The only reason I'm even facing it now, is because of you. I doubt I'll graduate high school as Tendo Akane, and if we do get married I will have to do something that I've associated with the worst part of my life." "Akane, you never HAVE to do THAT if you don't want to." Akane shook her head. "Trust me, it is something I want to do... eventually. It's just I'm afraid that it'll disgust me like it had then. Besides, what good is being married if you don't, ah, consummate it." "Um, how come you wanted to marry me when we got back from China?" Akane sighed. "I was still recovering from what happened in China. I nearly died, and it scared me. I realized either of us could die at any time. I didn't want to take the chance of losing you, so I went along with daddy's plan. Because I knew you love me, and don't you dare deny it, I would've married you in every way... Even if I would be uncomfortable about some of it." Ranma smiled a little. "Well, part of the reason I denied it then was because I was afraid you weren't ready." "Oh? What was the rest of the reason?" Ranma laughed nervously. "Well, I guess you could say cold feet. Anyway, how come you never talked about it to a friend?" "I did think of telling Sayuri and Yuka, but I doubt they would've understood. We were twelve at the time. How are they suppose to have a clue what I was going through. Hell, most adults don't have a clue about what I went through. Being raped is a violation that words can NOT describe. The sheer lack of control, lack of..." "...Justice, complete wrongness, the tearing of your soul, how you feel somehow worthless," Ranma interrupted Akane and continued on. Akane's eyes widen in shock. "Y-you w-were..." Ranma turned her head not wanting to look at Akane at that moment. "No. I'm actually referring to what I feel sometimes about my curse. It robs me of control of my life. It's a terrible punishment onto me for a crime of just being somewhere I shouldn't have been. There are times I turn into a girl and feel a piece of me has died." "I-I never thought about your curse that way." Akane looked down at the ground. "I'm sorry. I should've known better than anyone what you were going through, but I refused to think about your problems... just mine." Her tears increased in volume as they rolled down her cheeks. "Akane, it's all right. Dr. Tofu explained it all to me. He was the one that compared my curse to being raped. And, while I was somewhat willing to face my curse, you weren't willing to face your past. I've largely come to terms with what I am now, and can help you face your past." Akane smiled. "Thank you, Ranma." She wanted to say more, but words seemed inaccurate for what she wanted to say. "It's getting late. We should get some sleep." Ranma wiped a couple tears from Akane's face. "Are you going to be all right?" Akane nodded. "Yes. I think so." She then decided on something she thought about on the way there. "Um, Ranma, while I may not be, um, ready to make love to you yet, I was thinking..." "What is it?" "Well, could we, um, sleep sort of together? If I get use to your presence, it should help me be ready sooner." Ranma looked at Akane and, after a long moment, answered, "If it's what you." Ranma turned back into a guy and went into the same tent Akane did. After joining their sleeping bags, they crawled into bed. Shortly after falling saying their goodnights, Akane fell asleep. Hours later Ranma was still awake and was surprised to note that Akane seemed to be at peace, and wasn't thrashing around at night like he's seen her do in the past. He stared at Akane, unable to find sleep. There was always something about Akane that made Ranma nervous. Not the same nervousness that Shampoo generated, which was more of fear, but more of uncertainty. Uncertain of how he felt about the girl asleep in his arms. He wondered why he put up with her, with her anger, and with the fact she wasn't 'pure.' He could only come up with one answer. "I guess I do love you," Ranma whispered, and it somehow sounded right. He fell asleep shortly afterwards. ----------------------- Author's Notes: Something feels missing in this. If you have any suggestions let me know. I didn't do a flash back scene for what happened because Akane was only go over what happened- she didn't give details. She didn't relive the moments in her memory, she just told them. The idea came from reading a story that it was Kasumi that was raped as a child and told Ranma about it. The first thought I had about it was that it was plausible. The second thought is that if it happened to anyone in Ranma, it would be Akane. There is even canonical evidence to support it: In manga vol 10 (11 in Japanese) Shampoo's mushroom story: After Kasumi implied Ranma might try to seduce Akane, her watching a movie with an implied date rape scene, and Ranma hugging her- Akane tried pound Ranma into paste with a mallet and a bokken and to turn him into a pin cushion with a bow and arrows (a bit excessive if you ask me). Numerous other times Akane overreacts to Ranma appearing overly amorous. Such as Ranma sneaking into her room to deal with P-Chan. The real reason why Akane hates boys, with only Dr. Tofu as the exception when Ranma arrives. Why Soun still tried to get Ranma to marry Akane, even after finding out Ranma has no honor due to multiple engagements (among other things). Why does she trust Ryoga? Because besides trying to kill Ranma, he's always tried to protect her and has not tried to make a move on her of his own accord. (That's Akane's POV not the readers'.) Why did she consider falling in love with Shinnosuke? Because it was her fault he was dying. The shame of being responsible for someone's death out-weighed the shame of being raped. Why would Ranma seem to know? Akane initiated the kissing challenge after Mikado kissed Ranma. Akane kissed Ranma through the duck tape in Romeo and Juliet. Ranma only offered to Akane to hold his hand in Ryugenzawa, she didn't have to. Attempted grope in volume 34 was because Akane dragged him into a closet- he didn't know Akane was hiding him from his mother. That he seems to have zero sex drive most of the time. How to use the one case that can go against it: The attempted seduction in volume 32- Battle Douji. Ranma was more intent or getting rid of the douji, and probably forgot about that he wasn't suppose to seduce Akane. This adds credibility to why Akane was ready to kill Ranma when she found out he had tried to have sex with her for just to get rid of 'do-chan.'