Girl
Days
Part Ten
By Kenko
Girl Days
A Ranma 1/2 fanfiction
by Robert Haynie
(Guess.)
Part Ten: (An interval before serious silliness.)
The Tendo household had, since the arrival of Ranma and Genma Saotome, tended to run on a fairly simple routine.
Ranma would get up (usually under protest) and spar with his father in the courtyard while Akane went for her morning jog. Either Ranma or Genma would eventually wind up in the koi pond, upon which the other would soon follow. Kasumi would have a kettle of heated water ready, and breakfast would begin. During breakfast, Ranma would somehow insult Akane-- often inadvertently, usually earning a flight to the lower stratosphere or the koi pond again. After the usual argument, they would go to school.
Since the Girl Days Training, the routine had altered a bit.
Genma would initiate one of his pointless schemes to reinforce Ranma's masculinity. (This morning's plot consisted of barging into Ranma's room early in the morning, wearing war paint and a feather in his bandanna, beating a drum, and grunting.) Ranma would then punt her father into the koi pond, stretch, get dressed, and go out for the inevitable morning fight. After returning Genma to the pond, she would go in, have breakfast (which was a lot more peaceful since Nodoka had impressed on her that young ladies should not insult people casually), change for school, make sure her hair bow was on straight, and leave-- followed by Akane on the fence, now a lot more steady.
As they proceeded to school, Ranma idly said, "I wish I had a magical school uniform."
"A what?"
"Well, I mean one that would change when I do. So if I was at school on a boy day and get splashed, the uniform would change into the right one."
Akane giggled. "What a concept-- a uniform with a Jusenkyo Curse."
"Yeah... Very Tragic Story of Furinkan High School Girls Uniform that drown in spring fifteen hundred years ago..."
At this, Akane nearly fell off the fence. "Probably with your luck it would have three or four other uniforms trying to marry it!"
"Or at least share closet space. Hey, don't laugh so hard, you'll--"
Whump.
"You okay, Akane?" Ranma said with concern.
"Yeah... your training's made that easy... I didn't even think about breaking my fall," Akane said with some wonder. "I just did."
"That's a major part of the Art... think about tactics, think about strategy, think about what you are GOING to do-- but never think about DOING it. Just do it."
"Wow..."
"That's why you're up to ten feet in jumping now. You're doing well, Student."
"Arigato, Sensei. And we're here at school."
"I hope I can dodge the clubs today..."
Ranma was not talking about an attack from Kodachi, either.
School had been open for a week. And in that week, with the somewhat insane speed that Furinkan was so well known for, Ranma had somehow attracted not one, not two, but four entirely different fan clubs.
The Ranma-chan Preservation Society was composed of a group of girls that not only liked, but actually idolized the "new" Ranma. They spent a lot of time and effort wishing they could be as strong and skilled as her, trying to figure out ways to convince her to stay a girl full time, and reading texts on martial arts. Some had even joined local dojos. (There was much disappointment when it was learned that the Tendo Dojo wasn't taking students at the time.)
The Ranma-kun Restoration Alliance was dedicated to trying to convince Ranma to stay a BOY as much as possible, even with the training. They wanted the cutest guy in school back, even if they knew they couldn't have him, just so they could look at him and sigh deeply (a popular sport amongst many Furinkan girls the previous term).
The Ranma Fan Club was composed of a group of boys that hadn't got it into their somewhat limited intellects that there was no WAY that Ranma was going to go out with them, despite her present gender and mode of dress. It should be noticed that most of these boys couldn't get a date with a dead raccoon, but they seemed to think that Ranma would be different.
And then there was the really strange one-- a small, and secretive club, and the only one that Ranma approved of. The Helpers.
This organization consisted of Akane, Ukyo, Shampoo, Sayuri, Yuka, Hiroshi, and Daisuke. Their main job was rumor control and trying to keep the other three clubs from driving Ranma insane.
Akane was, by unspoken consent, the closest thing to a leader there.
Ukyo and Shampoo defused the Ranma-kun faction's attempts to splash the trainee girl with hot water (everyone knew that wasn't working right now, but there was always hope) or the Ranma-chan faction's attempts to try to get Ranma interested in the latest issue of Nakayoshi or the latest trends in male idol singers.
The other four handled Rumor control, and were driving Nabiki insane since people were going to THEM for free information that was accurate and complete instead of paying her.
Then again, she was making money in other ways. The tapes of the fight against Big Pocky were still selling well, the Girl Days pamphlets were in their third printing, and although she had yet to get any photos of Ranma in her more feminine nightwear, photos of her in her workout clothes sold well to Kuno and the Idiots (her personal name for the Ranma Fan Club).
There was also a fair sized club devoted to Shampoo. This one was severely annoying, although not to Ranma.
Somehow, they had gotten a somewhat distorted version of certain Amazon customs. The result was what Akane referred to as Justified Deja Vu.
In other words, every morning Shampoo had to fight off about thirty losers who were attacking her with the intention of getting a date. She was NOT a happy Amazon. Her only comfort was that the stupid stick-boy wasn't with them.
As Shampoo entered the classroom-- early-- Akane smirked a bit. Shampoo glared at the girl.
"Not fair. Shampoo no allowed to kill stupid boys. Only bash."
"Well, if I could handle the matter, so can you."
"Handling problem. Shampoo no want to handle stupid boys, they want hand--"
"Ranchan, is it fair to laugh like that?"
"Maybe not, but... bwah-hahahahaha!"
Proper ladies don't roll on the floor in their nice clean uniforms laughing their butts off and kicking their legs in the air in sheer hilarity. Ranma was VERY glad that she wasn't a proper lady, but a tomboy in training.
Three pairs of eyes rolled.
"G...gomen... I'll be good," Ranma said, dragging herself to her desk and trying to stifle her laughter. At that point Hinako-sensei entered, and people got very sober very quick.
Class began...
####
At lunch, Ranma prepared for the Assault of the Clubs.
She carefully eyed the two most consistent problems-- Kimiko, who was of the Ranma-chan faction, and would try to corner her and ask if she thought this boy or that boy was cute and the like, and Michiko, who was of the Ranma-kun faction and would try to be SO sympathetic over what HAD to be such a TERRIBLE time for her. The third faction, the Idiots, weren't at all predictable as to who she'd have to thump today.
(Honestly,) she thought, (Those two are INSANE. Kimiko wants me to become a girl 100%, and Michiko wants to get me into pants weither I want to be in them or not. And they both ALWAYS arrive at the same time-- yup, here they are.)
"Ranma-chan! There's a sale at the White Dove today!"
"Ranma-kun! I have a copy of an article on Kung-fu you might want to read!"
The two club leaders stopped, and started to glare at each other.
"I'm certain that she is interested in your article, Michiko-san, but she should know about the sale. There's a dress there that I saw the other day that I KNOW she'd love."
"I suspect, Kimiko-san, that HE has quite enough dresses-- doubtless more than HE likes, and would be far more interested in the MANLY arts..."
And as she had for the last three days, Ranma nodded, said "Well... I'll see you both at gym, ne?" and simply walked away to where SHE ate lunch-- with the Helpers. The two, as usual, didn't even notice, now locked into their verbal battle of witlessness.
It had become simply sensible for the Helpers and Ranma to eat lunch together. Partly because they understood-- mostly-- what was really going on, partly because in numbers there is strength, and mostly because they were all hungry and liked to share lunches.
"Ohayo! So, what's the things today?"
Shampoo passed Akane some ramen while Ukyo tossed an okonomiyaki to Daisuke. "Same old, same old," said Ukyo. "Nabiki's got good odds on that Enzo clown asking you out today."
"Errgh. Damn, that twerp makes KUNO look good."
As Ranma opened her bento, it was supplemented with ramen, okonomiyaki, and curry. Between Ranma's help in home economics and a lot of practice under guard by Kasumi, Akane's curry had improved to the point where it was not only edible, but actually verging on decent-- when hot.
But cold-- it was GOOD. Somehow, Akane was the only person that Ranma could think of who made a curry that was passable fresh but good as a leftover. She hoped that didn't mean she'd wind up in the future living entirely on cold curry.
She had to be watched cooking anything else though-- she still tended to improvise. Cherries and chocolate go well together-- but not in a Teriyaki sauce.
Ranma spent a few minutes erasing her hunger pangs, and then looked up. "Great food, arigato. Hey, Akane, the curry's better than usual. You're improving."
Akane grinned. "Well... Shampoo made the curry. I made the rice."
Ranma blinked.
Ate.
And said in wonder, "You... you made good rice? Akane, I... I don't know what to say... this is great!"
Akane for a moment wavered between being angry at the idea that it would be surprising that she could make good rice and being happy that Ranma was pleased with it. Then she remembered the rice she'd tried to make the week before. It had been... not rice-like. Even she'd had to admit that when her father used it to patch a hole in the dojo wall.
So she decided to be pleased. And smiled as Ranma began her new feminine but very very fast indeed method of eating.
All present knew that Ranma wouldn't talk for a while... food was important to her.
Just as water is important to fish.
"I'm still a little nervous, Ranma... please don't hit me, but you are so cute. There. I said it. NOW you can hit me," Daisuke said after a bit.
"That's OK, Dai. I'm flattered, actually. Getting used to being a girl, I guess. And no, I won't go out with you."
Daisuke pouted while Hiroshi sniggered.
"Shampoo hate to say it... but Ranma make pretty good girl after all."
"Gotta agree, Sham-chan, Ranchan's beating us all out in the kawaii competition... especially when she turns it on."
"I'm beginning to think Mom's right, you know," Ranma said, quietly.
"What do you mean?" asked Akane.
"That I am both a man and a woman. That I'm both. And that it's not so bad to be both. I... I kinda like dressing pretty sometimes, and I kinda like it that if I gotta be a girl I'm a GOOD looking girl, and... well, I guess maybe I AM both a boy and a girl, sort of."
"Does that mean you'll go out with me?" asked the clueless Daisuke.
"Naw. I'm a lesbian."
Facefaults abounded.
Ukyo stared. "What do you mean?"
"Well, when I'm a boy, I like girls. And when I'm a girl, I still like girls. So, I'm a heterosexual lesbian. That's what Cologne calls it."
There was a pause as the group tried to figure out the rather remarkable implications of someone being a heterosexual lesbian.
"Ranchan, you DO realize that's a contradiction in terms, right?"
"Not for me."
"Um... meaning?"
"Meaning that I could live with it, if I had to."
"Live with what?"
"It."
"It being?"
"Just... it."
Pause again.
"That's... scary, Ranma-chan," Sayuki said.
"Yeah... makes my head hurt," added Yuka.
"Damn, Ranma, that's a WIERD concept," continued Hiroshi.
"Well, it's a weird concept for anyone who isn't cursed to change from male to female at a common and often unavoidable trigger," mused Ukyo. "I think I know what she means-- I've lived most of my life as a boy, but I never had any attraction to girls. I'd probably be like her if I fell into the Nannichuan... a straight gay, so to speak."
"My head hurts more," complained Yuka.
Ranma ate while the rest of the group started thrashing out the complexities of being straight and gay at the same time.
Then she ate more. She was, after all, Ranma... and Ukyo was cooking, Shampoo had plenty of extra ramen, and Akane had done well on the rice. Besides, her head hurt too.
####
Hiroshi and Daisuke again stared at the girls athletic practice. Today it was volleyball. Volleyball with a slightly weird twist.
Once again, Shampoo found herself opposing Ranma. Since Shampoo DID know volleyball, (It was quite popular in the Jokusetzu village) the game followed the usual rules-- five girls on a side, playing the normal game.
Well, four girls on each side were playing a normal game. When the ball got to Ranma or Shampoo the game moved an average of fifteen feet higher. Both were VERY fond of aerial spikes.
It wasn't as daft as the infamous Anything Goes Softball game, but it was unusual.
After a while, the game finished (this time Shampoo's team won) and Ranma walked over. "Whew... never knew girls gym could be such a workout."
"Most girls don't play volleyball by jumping higher than the net, Ranma. MAN, that's fascinating to watch," replied Hiroshi.
Daisuke hadn't said anything. Hiroshi turned to his friend and stared at the frozen boy, who had a thin trickle of blood seeping from his nose.
"Dai? Wake UP, Dai..."
And in a dazed voice, Daisuke said, "Shampoo jump high. See under t-shirt. Shampoo no wear bra."
Ranma sighed. "I keep telling her a sportsbra is a good idea, but will she listen? No, not HER, Amazons don't wear bras. Scary when I'm more feminine than she is."
Daisuke just sat and drooled.
"Bet's that he joins the Shampoo fan club?" asked Hiroshi.
"Nabiki wouldn't touch that one with a blank check," smirked Ranma.
"Neither would I."
Daisuke mumbled something incoherent.
####
School ended, as it usually did. After a short delay caused by the need to pound Kuno, Akane and Ranma headed home. As they fencewalked, Akane was thinking.
"Hmm... I wonder if Cologne knows anything about transforming clothes?"
"Yeah, right. THAT'S real probable," Ranma replied.
"Well, you have Amazon training this afternoon, right? You can ask her. Who knows, she's come up with stranger things before."
At the Nekohanten, while practicing certain basic herbal blends, Ranma mentioned the joke to Cologne.
"Oh, certainly there are, Ranma."
Ranma dropped her Liver Root (good for cuts and bruises) and stared. "What? There IS such a thing?"
"There was, once. A powerful warlord, centuries ago, fell victim to the Nyannichuan. He was the type who preferred males, and thus found his curse to be... amusing. He had a wizard make a magical bracelet that caused his clothing to be exchanged when the curse was triggered. The histories of the Jokuzetsu say that he preferred the usual warlord style of garb when male, but liked very... revealing outfits when female. Often she would choose to seduce rather than attack an opponent... she became VERY powerful indeed."
"What happened to her? Him? Aw, YOU know what I mean."
"Killed in battle against sixty-three jealous wives. Mighty warlord, but something of a slut."
"Ah. Wonder if that thing still exists?"
"I have no idea... and I don't know how to make one either. A pity, it WOULD be useful, wouldn't it?"
"You said it... Now, how do I grind this root again?"
####
"Genma, there's no point in sulking," Nodoka scowled.
The panda sat playing listlessly with a tire. DAMNED if he was going to respond. Stupid woman, making his son a daughter.
"You're just being immature, you know."
Genma's only response was to bat the tire and gnaw on some bamboo.
"And that stunt this morning with the drum was ludicrous."
Sulking continued.
Nodoka sighed, and entered the house. A little later Ranma entered, wearing her Amazon pantsuit, and went upstairs to change.
Akane followed carrying bowls of Nekohanten takeout. "Auntie, do you want these in the kitchen?"
"No, Akane-chan. On the table is fine. Ranma will be down shortly."
"Alright. Oi, Nabiki-- pay up."
The Middle Tendo grimaced. She pulled out a wad of yen, and grumbled something about Akane getting too good at guessing the Idiot of the day.
"Hey, I figure that Enzo was a certain thing," smiled Akane.
"After the pounding Ranma gave him last week?"
"Well, I guess there's one thing I know about Enzo that you didn't."
"What can THAT be?" wondered Nabiki, who wasn't used to not knowing ANYTHING.
"He's a bigger moron than Kuno when it comes to women."
"Got THAT right, Akane," added Ranma, coming downstairs in a blouse and slacks. "I honestly think he'd try to date anything female and on two legs. And the two legs part is probably optional."
"Blast. I never paid any attention to him, he wasn't ever important before," fumed Nabiki. "I must be slipping."
"Well, I guess even you can have a bad day."
"It seems so, Ranma. But I'm not used to it..."
"Akane won the pool, eh?"
Akane gleefully displayed the 15,000 yen. "Yep! And I'm going to get a really nice dress out of this, too!"
Nabiki grumbled some more. She'd come out ahead-- of course-- but somehow paying off wagers to her sister ate at her.
"So, who's for ramen?" asked Akane.
"Me," replied Ranma curtly. "Cologne makes that training tough. Nice of her to make the snacks for us."
"Aren't you afraid you'll spoil your dinner?" asked Nabiki.
Akane stared at her in confusion.
"Oh, right... it's Ranma."
Ranma, meanwhile, was already happily slurping the ramen. "I think I'll relax after this for a bit. Maybe sun a while."
"Ranma, you have gotten into sunbathing WAY to much," Akane teased.
"Hey, I can't explain it, but I really really like the way the sun feels on this body."
"Along with see-through blue nighties, Ranma-chan?" grinned Nabiki.
"Well... the fabric, yeah. Can't deny it. When I'm a girl things just tend to feel, well, better. Some things anyhow. Then again, I don't have quite the threshold for pain that I do when I'm a boy. It's a funny thing, really."
Nodoka chose that moment to enter from the kitchen. "Ranma, you're going to spoil your appetite for dinn-- no, never mind." She shook her head. "I can't understand why you never seem to have any concerns about your figure, the way you eat..."
"I get LOTS of exercise, Mom."
"I suppose that's true. Well, then... is there any left?"
Ranma passed a bowl to her mother, giggling. "It's just a snack anyhow."
"To YOU it's a snack. To anyone else it's a meal."
The four set to simple eating for a while then...
####
Ranma LOVED the sun now that she'd allowed herself to get used to it. In fact, at times, she almost felt like purring over the way the warm light washed over her body.
She wondered why she'd never noticed how things felt so different when she'd been under the influence of the Cat's-tongue pressure point or the Chiisuton incident. (Herb no baka.) Maybe it was because those times she'd been doing her level best to hang on to her masculinity and this time she was trying to be a girl. Or maybe it was because she was just way too pissed then.
Whatever, she was finding that to some extent she was enjoying being a girl. Not that she didn't miss being a boy-- she DID-- but this wasn't so bad. And there was no doubt that some things were a lot more fun as a girl.
As she applied some extra sunblock to her thighs, she was unpleasantly reminded that there were also some things that were NOT more fun as a girl.
"My pony-tailed-- no, my fire haired-- no, my-- you know, 'twould be kind of you to stick to a single hairstyle, my love, that I might sing your praises better."
Ranma sighed. "Kuno. What do you want?"
"Would that I could dally longer, but I must be going swiftly. I have come merely to tender invitations to you and the Tendo's to a small celebration at my manor this weekend, in honor of a wonderful event."
"And that would be?"
"My father has broken his ankle and will be away from the school for a week or more."
"Hmmm... Gotta give it to you there. I'll see that the Tendo's get theirs."
"My thanks, beauteous one. Ah... and that particular garment suits you well, as the tigress I know you to be."
As Kuno left-- for once under his own power-- Ranma sighed. She personally didn't think this tiger-striped bikini was really her, but she'd bought it, so she'd wear it... once in a while.
####
"You have to be KIDDING, Nabiki. No WAY are we going to a costume party at Kuno's!"
"What Ranma said! NEITHER of us want to have anything to do with either of them normally-- and you want us to accept this invitation?"
Nabiki thought very very fast. "Well, I suppose if neither of you are interested..."
"You KNOW we ain't!"
"Although Kuno does put out a very good spread..."
"Don't care," said Ranma. "He's a jerk, his sister's a jerk, almost everyone in that house is a jerk. I ain't going to no jerks house for a costume party. Besides, I ain't got a costume anyhow."
"Same here, Nabiki. Kuno's picture is in the dictionary next to the word baka. I for one don't fell like being harassed by him or his sister."
Nabiki realised that the two girls were truly adamant. She resorted to something she rarely used. The absolute and unpaid for truth.
"Look... Morons the whole family might be, but influential morons. A lot of people from school are going to be there, but also some very important businessmen. I can really use the contacts. So, please?"
"No." Akane glowered.
"No WAY." Ranma looked disgusted. "Besides, you're invited too, so you don't need us."
"I...I'll..."
"You'll what?" asked Ranma.
"I'll... pay you."
The two blinked. Audibly.
"I'll pay you each two thousand yen to go."
Akane and Ranma looked doubtful.
"Three thousand! Please, I NEED the contacts, and I need you two to run interference with the loons that will show up!"
Akane and Ranma conferred. Then--
"Four thousand plus a new swimsuit for Akane and a new Gundam CD for me," Ranma said.
Nabiki, once again, sighed internally at how smart Ranma seemed to have gotten since Girl Days. She'd always held that women were smarter than men, but she'd never expected that to apply to Ranma.
"Deal. But you both better have GOOD costumes."
"We can deal with that."
####
"Shampoo was invited as well. And before you ask, Ranma, I have suggested that she not go as a cat."
"Arigato," Ranma said in genuine gratitude. "I was wondering if you had any ideas for a good costume? Akane says she's got a perfect one for her, but I'm still stuck."
"I'm sorry, Ranma. But I can't-- excuse me."
Cologne went to the back and started yelling at Mousse. Ranma shrugged, and returned to the complex Amazon kata that she was training in. Well, the kata wasn't that complex, actually. Doing it with two bonbori, one mallet, and a cheese sandwich was. (Ranma had yet to understand the purpose of the cheese sandwich.)
"Ranma, come back here, would you?" Cologne called.
Shrugging and replacing her weapons (and the sandwich) in her sleeves, Ranma wet back to see Mousse tapping buttons on a videogame machine. The blind boy for once was wearing his glasses and grinning madly as Ranma heard sounds of gunfire and dying animals.
"Does that hairdo remind you of anyone, Ranma?" asked Cologne with a broad smile.
Ranma blinked. And began to giggle. "Oh, yeah. It sure does. I think I got my costume idea..."
####
Akane smiled. Took her a while-- she wasn't the best seamstress-- but this costume looked perfect. She wondered what Ranma was going to wear. Idly she twirled in front of her mirror, grinning. Ranma was right. She DID have nice legs.
####
Ukyo smiled. Costume party at Kuno's. Well, whe wouldn't have gone, until she heard that Ranchan would be there. And Akane. And apparently Shampoo. And of course Kodachi.
She hitched the top of the costume a bit and smiled. Thank heaven for wierd gaijin TV shows. THIS was going to catch Ranchan's eye for sure.
####
Shampoo waited eagerly for the day that Ranma would be a boy again. But until then she felt it her duty to make certain that she knew what Shampoo had to offer.
And in this outfit, there would be no doubt that she had a lot to offer indeed.
####
And lest it be forgotten, others were coming. Not all invited. Of course.
Ingredients list, anyone?
####
End part ten
####
And BOY, is part eleven going to be a hoot! ^_^
This part was mostly filler space to set up some sheer chaos and to allow Ranma to relax a bit. Poor girl needs her beauty sleep.