"Mystery Crimson Theater 3000" Sailor Gay! MiSTed by Crimson Blaze Author Note's: This is my first MiSTing and I picked a short fic to try it out and see if I'm any good. First I would like to thank Megane 6.7 who's MiSTings have kept me laughing long into the nights and making me want to try it out for myself. Second I would like to thank the author of Sailor Gay! whos messed up tastes have given me good amount of material to work with. Finally I would like to thank anyone who has this posted on their site. I appologize in advance for my horrible grammar, spelling, and overall writing. (Insert opening scenes here) Another Author Note: No host segment because of how short this is, next time folks. Please note this has some, well X-rated content to put it nicely. If you are under 18 you shouldn't be reading this. (Insert door scene) Third Author Note: I haven't decided how to do the door scene and opening theme yet, just use your imagination. >Sailor Gay! Version 2. (format change) TOM: Maybe this format will make it better... >Note. >If you do not like indecent material, please turn your head from the monitor >as the text scrolls down your screen. You know the rules. MIKE: Yeah, you guys know the rules. TOM: Of course I do. > One day Serena got fed up. "Fuck it," she said. CROW: Yah, that's what I thought after I couldn't get my Chia Pet to grow either. > The other Sailors glanced at her in surprise as she got up to make a >declaration: "I'm tired of all this bullshit. TOM: What bullshit is this? CROW: Yah! I'm tired of this fucking bullshit of a fic too! LETS THRASH THE THEATER! MIKE: Crow! Settle down... it's been 7 lines you can hold it longer can't you? CROW: Your right Mike... I should settle down... RIGHT AFTER I THRASH THE THEATER! TOM: Crow shut up! CROW: You shut up! TOM: No you shut up! MIKE: Quiet guys the longer we fight the longer the fic... > You all can say what you want but what I want to know is, who in here wants to get butt-naked and fuck >me?" (Tom raises hand) MIKE: TOM! PUT YOUR HAND DOWN IT'S A FIC IT'S NOT REAL! (Tom lowers hand) TOM: Oh, I forgot. CROW: Can I thrash the theater now Mike? MIKE: Not yet... > The other Sailors glanced at each other, mouths wide open at this sudden >and frank request. Amy, tugging her cuff nervously, said, "I would- like- >to-" MIKE: ...Get six CDs for the price of one! TOM: ...Sell my hair at high-prices on the Asian market! CROW: ...Thrash the theater! > Serena stared her down, waiting for her to finish. "Well?" > Mina and Lita were still in shock over the ordeal when Raye stood up. TOM: Shock? Everyone knows those two are the lesbians of the group! MIKE: Tom! TOM: What? MIKE: I thought you remembered the rules! TOM: Of course I do, didn't say I was gonna follow them though. >"Serena what is this?!!" she snarled in her face. MIKE: So Raye was in her own face when she snarled? TOM: Yup I think so. MIKE: Ok, just making sure I understood what was going on. > Serena palmed Raye's face and pushed her backward. "Fuck off!" > This angered Raye greatly. In a second she was on top of Serena, beating >at her face and tugging her hair. CROW: That's fuck number two! Your hanging on by a thread mister! > Suddenly Amy leaped on the red-hot Raye and threw her off of Serena. Raye >tumbled backward and hit her head on the wall, incapacitating her. TOM: Violence, swearing, and sex... Mike I don't think the author is playing by the rules. MIKE: He's playing by the bad lemon writer's set of rules... don't worry about it. CROW: Now? MIKE: Not yet... > Serena looked over at Raye before turning back to Amy. "Nice throw." > Lita stood up. "Would someone please explain to me what the FUCK is going >on?" CROW: Number three. TOM: Ok Lita here's what going on: Serena is being naughty, Raye is in her own face, and Amy is being violent. You're standing right there pay attention next time. MIKE: Good recap Tom. TOM: Thanks. > Serena looked at her. "Why are you so mad, Lita-bee? Or, should I say >Lita-Bi because you're bi-sexual, hence the reason I'm asking you in the >first place!" CROW: Lita-bee? What the hell is that about! That makes no sense! That's it Mike I'm thrashing the theater now! MIKE: Sorry Crow... our author says we can't thrash the theater until the fics over. CROW: Damn... I'm ok... serenity now, serenity now... > Lita, normally given to violent fits of anger, tried to stay calm this >time. "Serena?" > "What?" > "You're right." > Lita ripped off her blouse and posed in the middle of the room. "I am >Lita-Bi, champion of the lesbians of America! Thank you Sailor Moon, for >helping me be proud of who I naturally am." She undid her bra and laid it >softly on Serena's meatballs. TOM: Hey doesn't Sailor Moon take place in Tokyo? CROW: Yes, I believe it does. TOM: WELL THAN WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON! MIKE: TOM! Settle down it's just a bad lemon! You'll be ok! > "Uh, sure," replied Serena nervously. > Mina was watching as the three were kissing and rubbing each other down. >She listened to the sounds. CROW: I love the graphic sex scenes, so they're kissing each others ouchies, and rubbing each other with sunscreen? MIKE: Don't think so. CROW: Well the damn author should be using more detail! MIKE: CROW IT'S A BAD LEMON GIVE IT UP! > "More breast, damn it!" TOM: ...And more wing, damn it! MIKE: Tom... > "Shutup and fuck!" Then a sniffing noise. CROW: That's number four pal! TOM: Wow! That makes sex sound really classy! "Shutup and fuck!" Boy oh boy I'm sure this guy is getting tons of women! > Haruka walked right into the house and leaped right into the middle of the >heap of girls. CROW: Good maybe she killed one of them. > Before anyone could say anything, she said, "I can smell >pussy from anywhere! I just knew that you girls would show your true colors >I'm so proud of you all!" CROW: Yes, I'm so proud that you agreed to be in this fic! TOM: You know, we don't even know where they are. CROW: Maybe a pet shop, seeing how there is so much pussy there. MIKE: CROW! > At this point, Raye and Mina decided resistance to their sexual desires >was futile, what with the pussy smell that was clouding the air around them. TOM: I think your right about the pet shop. MIKE (imitating borg): Resistance is futile! >Staring at each other from across the room, they both undressed completely >and made love to each other. A round of applause came from the four other >girls. CROW (imitating Serena clapping): They finally figured out how to undress themselves! MIKE: Once again those graphic love making scenes show up. > Serena looked at a camera on the wall and said, "Isn't this great we are >sailor GAY!" CROW: Thus the name of the fic. TOM: Thus the reason why I want to kill myself. > "MOON LESBO POWER!!!" the others chanted in unison. TOM: IT'S OVER LET ME OUT! MIKE: Suprise your on candid lesbian camera! CROW: Ok can we thrash the theater now! MIKE: Nope our author says we might be needing it again. CROW and TOM: WHAT! * THE END * Well how'd you like it? Remember that is my first try and comments or suggestions you can provide would be helpful. Send them to Crimson_Blaze@hotmail.com. "I am Lita-Bi, champion of the lesbians of America! Thank you Sailor Moon, for helping me be proud of who I naturally am."