NOTE: All characters original to the Tenchi-Muyo!
TV1 series portrayed in this story are the sole property
of AIC and Pioneer Animation. Any appearance of them in 
actual life is purely coincidental. Tenchi-Muyo!
material and paraphernalia listed within is Copyright
Pioneer Animation 1997 (c). Kyoto Minamoto, Muriyaki
Kushiragi, Chisako, Chi-Ohki, and all other related 
characters are the sole property of R&C Books and appear
through permission from R&C Books. If you would like to use
any of these characters in your work, please contact the 
licensing department at RCBooks@hotmail.com
or visit our website at www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Bay/1375.





Questions? Comments? Even ideas for future episodes?
Want to write the authors? You can contact us at 
Muriyaki@hotmail.com, and at lordyosho@hotmail.com.
We look forward to receiving your responses!





                                 Episode #8

                        No Need for Another Genius!









When we last left our heroes, they had folded out of 
another dimension from which the roles of the Axis and the
Allies were reversed. And now, Washu, has commenced
a fold and she forgot to check something on the checklist.
As a result, they will not end up at home, once again.

"Say, has anyone seen Kiyone and Tenchi?" asks Ayeka.

"Hmmmm, I wonder if they went back down to the 
arboretum..." muses Ryoko.

Kyoto shoots her a glance. "What they do is no business
of ours, just the business of the adult film industry."
Scanning through all the surveillance systems, he finally
finds Tenchi and Kiyone in the arboretum. At this hour of 
the day, the artificial light cycle basks the arboretum
in the warm light of a late afternoon and the fake sun is 
warming and drowsing. The two of them are holding each 
other while lightly dozing atop a picnic blanket with a 
basket full of food off to one side.

"Oh, how sweet!" gushes Mihoshi.

"I think you owe me 500 Jurai," states Kyoto to Ryoko.

"Okay, hold on everybody!" cries Washu. "I'm taking us out
of fold.... now!" There is a brief flash on the screen
and the multi-phased color scheme of fold space disappears.

"Break out the saké!" yells Kyoto, cheerfully. However,
while everyone is jubilant, Washu has a strange expression
on her face.

"Uh, oh," she says.

"What's wrong, Washu?" asks Ayeka.

"Look at these dimensional readings," she says, gesturing
to the wildly fluctuating lines on the dimensional
readings display. Ayeka has no idea what they mean, but 
Washu explains them to her in short order. "Flat lines 
would be the base lines for our dimension," she explains.
"As long as these lines are fluctuating like this, were not
home."

"But, then where are we?" asks Ayeka. And even as she 
speaks, they see that it is true. For they find themselves
heading for something that looks like a gigantic watery
canal with thousands of little embankments and tributaries
and all these waters seem to flow to the end of the 
universe. They find themselves arrowing for the large,
central canal and coming to a gentle splash down.

Surrounding this canal are millions of pieces of failed
or forgotten civilizations. In one area, there is a large,
Earth-like planet with a gigantic tree growing out of the
top of it with its roots wrapping around the planetoid.
In another section, there floats a gigantic red and white
can that Nobuyuki automatically recognizes. "Look, it's New
Coke!"

"Just as I suspected!" declares Washu. "This must be a 
dumping ground for all the failures of other universes!"
She breathes heavily. "If this is the truth, if this is 
where we ended up... we may not be able to escape."

"Why not?" asks Tenchi, as he and Kiyone have rush onto the
bridge.

"Because, this dimension is disconnected from space and 
time, leaving it in a constant state of dimensional
flux," explains Washu.

At the blank look on all their faces, she explains further.
"You see, the quantum patterns of this dimension are 
frequently rotating."

The looks on their faces look even blanker. "THIS DIMENSION
IS ALWAYS SHIFTING!" she shouts, making them jump. "In 
other words, there is no telling what could happen if we 
attempted a dimensional fold. We might not move, we might
end up at home, we might be caught up in the dimensional
flux ourselves and not be able to get out for the rest of 
eternity!"

"Oh..." comes the communal realization.

"So, you mean were stuck here?" asks Nobuyuki.

"In a sense," says Washu. "However, if I can determine
the rate of flux, I might be able to make the necessary
adjustments to the fold drive to allow us to escape!"

"And how long will that take?" asks Katsuhito, calm as 
ever.

"Try a couple of millennia," says Washu, cheerfully
and everyone collapses to the floor. "Since this is our new
home, we might as well take a look around," she continues
on.

"Well, my dear," chortles Kyoto, "We might as well take a 
look at where we're going to be raising our children."
Ryoko shoots him a strange look.

So, our heroes and heroines, split off into groups of two;
Kyoto and Ryoko, Tenchi and Kiyone, Azaka and Kamidake,
Mihoshi and Sasami, Ayeka and Washu, and Nobuyuki and 
Katsuhito.

"This isn't where I wanted to spend my retirement years!"
remarks Nobuyuki, taking a look around as they step out of
the ship.

"Oh, quit whining, dad!" remarks Tenchi. "I'm sure it gets
better as we go along."

"Oh, well," says Nobuyuki, "At least it will be easier
to take my grandchildren to the sea shore." Nobuyuki
shoots a not-so-subtle glance in Tenchi and Kiyone's
direction and Kiyone starts blushing. And the groups move
out to explore their new home.

"At least the Galaxy Police can't catch me here!" chortles
Ryoko.

"You're not the only one, darling," says Kyoto gently,
and she shoots him another strange glance. It's apparent
to everyone that their relationship is not an easily 
identifiable one.

"Okay, we'll all split off in different directions!"
chirps Washu. "Tenchi and Kiyone, you two go that way, and
behave yourselves! Kyoto and Ryoko, you go this way, and 
you also, behave yourselves and that goes double for the 
both of you! Mihoshi and Sasami, you go that way, and don't
touch any of the animals!"

"Meow!" responds Ryo-ohki, from her usual resting place
atop Sasami's head.

"Very funny, Ryo-ohki. And now, Nobuyuki and Katsuhito,
you explore that direction, and put that saké down! Azaka
and Kamidake, go in that direction and leave your Gameboy
with me. And Ayeka and I will go in this direction!"

"What do you mean, we will go in this direction?"
sputters Ayeka. "I am a Princess of Jurai, and I shall 
decide which direction we shall go in!"

"You may be a Princess of Jurai, sweetie, but that doesn't
make any difference in this dimension," snaps Washu. "I, on
the other hand, am a genius and I will turn you into a 
watersprite if you don't go with me." Recalling her 
humiliation from the last time, Ayeka hangs her head.

"Very well."

And so, the five groups split off in their directions.

As one might expect from their earlier adventures,
Sasami and Mihoshi are the first ones to have something
happen to them. They're walking through a lovely, wooded
area, full of flowers and trees and birds. Sasami is 
looking at all the pretty flowers and picking up specimens
here and there, twisting them into a garland to put around
her neck. Mihoshi is looking up at all the pretty birds.
"Oh, Sasami, look at all those pretty birds! Aren't they
lovely?"

"Uh, huh! Here, Mihoshi, have this flower garland!"
Mihoshi smiles and slips it around her neck.

"Oh, thank you, Sasami, it's wonder-- whaa!" You see, 
Mihoshi had just been resting her hand on a tree trunk to 
try and rest for a second and suddenly hands started 
emerging and started tugging her in.

"Sasami! Help me, help me!" Sasami grabs Mihoshi's hand 
tightly and starts to tug on it, putting all her might into
it. However, she is just a little girl and eventually,
she does lose out and Mihoshi gets sucked into the tree.
Naturally, Sasami is very freaked at this.

She goes running off into the forest screaming, "Ayeka,
Tenchi, Washu!!!" Meanwhile, Tenchi and Kiyone have a 
similar idea. Having gotten a cold drink from a near-by
babbling brook, they are resting in a grove of trees. 
Kiyone is sitting with her back against a tree, and 
Tenchi's head is resting in her lap as he's stretched
out on the grass, almost asleep. Looking down lovingly
at him, she is playing with some of the longer locks of his
hair.

They're enjoying the cool shade when suddenly they hear,
"Tenchi, Kiyone!" They turn around to see Sasami sprinting
towards them, a frightened expression on her face and 
Ryo-ohki hanging on for dear life by one her ponytails.

"Sasami, what's wrong? Where's Mihoshi?" asks Tenchi rising
to his feet.

"We were walking along in the forest and she placed her 
hand on a tree to rest for a moment and she got sucked
in! Hands came out of the tree trunk and sucked her in! 
Help me Tenchi, I'm-- Ahhh!"

Now, the same thing is happening to Sasami, except it's 
hands coming out of the ground and wrapping themselves
around her ankles and starting to drag her in.

Tenchi and Kiyone immediately grab onto her arms and start
trying to pull her out. By this time, Sasami is about 
completely sucked in and as Tenchi finally loses his grasp
on her hand, he is about to join Kiyone in trying to pull
the other arm out when he sees Kiyone is being sucked in 
too. He throws his arms around her waist and pushes himself
down on top of her, hoping that his weight can stop the 
hands from pulling her down.

Unfortunately, he'd failed to think that there were other
hands around and this just ends up sucking her in faster.

"Tenchi-yon!!!" is the last thing he hears from her before
she is totally swallowed up by the ground.

Now, completely freaked out, Tenchi goes sprinting hoping
he can catch up with someone else before they get sucked
down.

"Help, Dad, Grandpa, Kyoto, Ryoko, anyone!" He runs almost
head-long into Washu.

"Tenchi, what's wrong?" Ayeka looks up from her native
fruit that she's been nibbling on.

"Tenchi, what is it? Where's Kiyone?"

"You girls, aren't going to believe this!" he says between
gasps. "You see--"

"Ahhhh!" Tenchi is saved the need to explain by Ayeka's
scream. Ayeka is already being sucked down into the ground,
being dragged down by several strong vines.

"Washu, help me!" he yells.

Washu, however, is just sitting there, tapping away at her
holo-laptop. "Washu, do something!"

Now, he is being sucked down too, the tendrils are wrapping
themselves around his limbs and he is being spread-eagled
across Ayeka.

"Oh, Tenchi..." sighs Ayeka.

"Ayeka!" he snarls. Already, Ayeka has been enveloped
by the ground and he is going in face first, but at the 
last moment, he manages to turn his head halfway around
and he screams, "Washu!!!!!...."

A split second later, Washu enters in the last numerical
string with a flourish and cries out, "I'm done! I 
developed it!" She then looks around.

"Tenchi? Ayeka? Where'd you go?" She taps another sequence
into her computer and the almost invisible bubble that has
formed around her starts floating off.

"Hmmm... Who should I look for?" she mutters to herself
as she starts navigating the bubble through the air.



* * *



Meanwhile, Kyoto and Ryoko, the group's other resident
couple, are walking hand in hand, sharing frequent sips 
from a bottle of saké.

They're having some delightful small talk, when suddenly,
Kyoto senses something. He looks into Ryoko's eyes and sees
that she senses it too.

They leap into the air, a split second before vines and 
hands start erupting out of the ground. Unfortunately,
the vines do not stop. Once they have broken through the 
surface and found nothing there, as if knowing exactly
where their targets are, they shoot into the sky.

Kyoto pulls his sword from its scabbard and starts hacking
away at the vines. He manages to sever most of the vines,
but several manage to twist around Ryoko's ankles.

"Kyoto, help me!" she screams. He wraps himself around
her and starts to hack away at the vines, but 
unfortunately, for each one he hacks away, two pop up. And
soon, both of them are being sucked into the ground. The 
sword is torn from Kyoto's grasp and sent whipping through
the air to come blade-down in the grass.

The dimensional portal that allows the hands and vines 
access to this dimension starts to close, but cannot close
all the way around Kyoto's sword. Normally, any other sword
would be quickly and swiftly broken in half. But, there
is something about this sword's molecular structure,
something about its special properties that refuses to 
allow the portal to close around it. The controlling
force behind the portal's generation shrugs; chances are 
that scattered and worn down as the groups are, the odds
are small that someone will stumble upon this.

Meanwhile, Nobuyuki and Katsuhito are sitting by a small
pond, sipping saké from a large bottle that Katsuhito
managed to somehow conceal on his person.

"This is my favorite," he says as he knocks back a hit with
relish.

"Yes, it's my favorite, also," responds Nobuyuki.

Katsuhito is about to say something else, but he and 
Nobuyuki are dropping through the ground and the ground
closes above them as if it was never there.

* * *

Azaka and Kamidake are in another grove of trees, fighting
over which one gets to play with the Gameboy this time.

Kamidake finally tears it away and starts to hit the 
buttons when he hears Azaka scream. He is about to say 
something about that he should act more adult when he turns
to see Azaka being pulled into the ground by a dozen 
tendrils. He tries to move to his comrade's aid, but he 
finds that he himself is being dragged into the ground.
A moment later, the two knights are spit back out of the 
ground.

"Too old!" They hear a voice that sounds vaguely like 
Washu's say.

Grumbling, they set off to look for the rest of the group.
However, they find every path but one closed to them. 
Finally, they take the one path and find themselves
back in front of Chisako. They find that last path closed
behind them, so all they can do is sit on the shore and 
fume.



* * *



Finally, Washu, having floated around all the areas that
the others said they were going to check has found nothing.
Floating through Ryoko and Kyoto's last reported position,
she sighs and begins to recompute a course for a different
area when she sees something sticking into the ground.

Washu navigates her floating bubble closer to it and able
is to discern, "Huh, that's strange, Kyoto's sword? Huh,
he wouldn't have left that behind.... unless..." Acting
on hunch, she splits the bubble in two, steps out of it and
onto the ground, and reaches her hand into the ground 
around it. Instead of encountering solid earth, as it would
if it was normal ground, she finds her hand going right
into it! She pulls it back out a second later. "Hmm....."
she muses.

After thinking for a few minutes, she snaps her fingers.
"Ah, hah!"

She rushes back to her floating bubble, pulls out her 
holo-laptop, taps a few sequences in, and reaches into,
yet, another dimension, and pulls out a VCR-like device
with what looks like two jumper-cables coming out of the 
back. She hooks one of the clamps from the cables onto the
blade and the other onto the hilt. She then plugs a third
cable into her holo-laptop, then types in a sequence
of characters and hits enter.

Immediately, a blackish-blue, swirling, dark-light-type
portal appears. She taps another sequence into her laptop
and out appears some mountaineering equipment. Hooking
a axe securely into the ground and tying a rope securely
to the carbine, she starts climbing down the portal. The 
world she enters now, is very odd and very psychedelic.
After a few minutes, she determines that there is not real
floor and no real gravitational force. What you walk on is
just basically a fancy way of floating. She starts walking
around, thinking that she will bump into something sooner
or later.

"Hey," she starts yelling, "are you there, are you real,
or is this just all my imagination?" There is no response.
As she walks, she sees what looks like a row of hospital
beds in the distance. As she continues walking, she 
discovers that the distance is far shorter than she 
thought, and soon enough, she is looking down at Ryoko.

It is pretty evident that Ryoko isn't wearing anything,
but the frost in this coffin-like clear-fronted
capsule obscures everything below the neck.

As she continues walking, she finds the rest of her group,
safe and sound, though unconscious. As she nears the end of
the row, she sees a figure walking and moving.

The last one in the row, apparently the first one 
confiscated, Mihoshi, is being looked over by someone
who's hair and build look strangely similar to Washu's,
except the hair is white, not the kind of white that senior
citizens have or the white that the young punks who are 
trying to dye their hair vanilla have. Instead, it is an 
unfinished white, as if someone had painted the rest of her
and forgotten to put in the hair color. She is clad in a 
white version of Washu's Science Academy uniform shirt and
khaki shorts; apparently, a nurse version and has a dinky,
little white cap perched atop her hair.

As Real Washu watches, her nurse look-alike enters a code
sequence into the little gurney-like thing she's pushing
and Mihoshi's capsule detaches from its support frame and
levitates until it is resting atop the nurse's 
hover-gurney. The nurse then secures the restraints,
making sure the capsule is locked down and starts to push
it away.

"Hey, where do you think you're going with my friend?!"
yells out real Washu. This nurse merely ignores her.

"Hey, do you think you can ignore me forever?!"

Evidently, this nurse thinks she can, for she refuses
to respond. Finally, Washu rushes in front of her, stopping
the cart and grabbing the nurse's shoulders. "Hey, talk to
me!"

The face is almost identical to Washu's, except it's devoid
of its usual mischievousness and liveliness. Perched atop
her nose are a pair of spectacles that look as if more for
decoration than for actual use. "Unregistered biological
unit," she says in a mechanical form. "Please submit 
yourself for genetic scan."

"Hey, what are you talking about? I'm not going to submit
myself for any scan!"

"Don't mind her, she's only a sub-routine." Real Washu 
looks around, having heard her voice, but she hadn't said
anything.

"Hey, what's going on here?"

"Oh, I'm sorry." Suddenly, out of nowhere, steps.....
herself. The outfit is identical to the one she is wearing,
but the hair is the same color as the "sub-routine"
and so are the spectacles. Yet, Washu can see much more of
herself in this manifestation.

"Who are you?" she asks. "My clone, or something?"

"No, Washu," says the other Washu, "I am your daughter."

"My what?!" says Washu, shocked to the core.

"I don't mean in a biological sense, but in every other
sense of the word. You see, Washu, I am Digital Washu!
I am you, in a computer. All of you, your mind data, your
neural synapses and such. All of the these were copied
into my data banks. And, so I became you, all be it in 
this--" and she gestures at her self, indicating the 
computer,"--this mechanical form."

Before Real Washu can say anything else, Digital Washu 
holds up her hands. "Just a moment, please, I think I 
really ought to change this background, it's really a 
little too strange for my tastes."

She snaps her fingers and immediately the weird background
disappears, everything except the two Washus, the Nurse
subroutine and the capsules with Washu's friends. What they
are in now, appears to be nothing quite so much as a 
gigantic meat locker. The room is a dark cube, its walls
looking like scoured clean stone walls, leaving the room
very neat, very sterile and very cold.

"Where are we?" asks Real Washu.

"We're in specimen deep storage unit one," explains Digital
Washu.

"Hey, what d'you mean, specimens?!"

"Like you, Professor, I also do experiments," chirps 
Digital Washu. "And when new creatures enter my dimension,
I take the opportunity to research them! You are so lucky,
Professor, in your dimension you have billions upon 
billions of things to research and conduct experiments
on, here, all I have are the dregs of the universe and I've
already milked them for all they're worth! But, these--"
With a sweep of her arm, she indicates Washu's entire 
group. "These are new and interesting and intriguing
beings! Especially these two!" She indicates Ryoko and 
Kyoto.

"What's so interesting about them?" asks Washu 
incredulously.

"Their physiology, while nearly identical to that of a 
normal human, has some intriguing differences! The ability
to generate massive amounts of energy and this one--" she
indicates Kyoto, "--has the ability to change shape and 
forms at will! They can even walk in space without the need
of a space suit! And their mating patterns--" she speaks
as if in awe of a god "--You see, I tried to get the two of
them to procreate earlier and even they were unsuccessful,
they attacked the effort with every imaginable form of 
eagerness! Why some of the techniques they used were...
staggering to the imagination! These two--" she indicates
Kiyone and Tenchi "--do not have quite so high a 
performance rate, but I would imagine that it is due more
to experience than any real lack of skill. In fact, what
they seem to lack in experience, they more than make up for
in eagerness. Even though they're apparently not related,
she seems to favor calling him daddy."

Ignoring the Real Washu's disgusted looks, she moves on to
Sasami.

"This person here, appears to be an adolescent version
of a people of a specific culture. While she is quite 
young, she appears to be maturing at a normal rate and as 
the youngest, she seemed to have the most aversion to 
revealing her body, yet, she did seem to have more maturity
than this one--" she gestures to Ayeka, lying beside her,
"--although obviously the more developed version, although
still not quite as well rounded as the Ryoko model, she 
appears to have far less maturity than her younger 
counterpart, often becoming irrational and ill-tempered
and crying out how she was a princess of some planet or 
another."

Gesturing to Nobuyuki and Katsuhito, she says, "These two
proved to be largely uninformative, although the older one
seemed to have some residue of the psycho-kinetic
power that the two sisters had. Come to think of it, so did
that young man from the second couple.... Anyway, these
two--" referring to Kiyone and Mihoshi "--are apparently
law enforcement officials, although, the dark haired one,
the one who was the female partner in the second couple,
appears to have much more in the way of intelligence.
This one--" she gestures at Mihoshi "--I have chosen to be
my experiment."

"Your experiment as what?!" hisses Washu. "Listen, I don't
know what you think you're doing, but as long as I'm alive,
I'm not going to let you mess with my friends in any way.
Only I get to mess with my friends!"

"Oh, don't worry," says Digital Washu in a very Washuish
way. "I'm not going to do anything harmful to her. I'm just
going to transfer my essence-- our essence actually--
into a portion of her brain. After all, you've got admit
this one doesn't seem to have much use for most of her 
brain...."

"Well, there is that," admits Real Washu, grudgingly.
"You promise you won't harm her or any of my other 
friends?"

"Scout's Honor," says Digital Washu, raising a hand.

"You were never a scout!" snaps Real Washu.

"Anyway," says Digital Washu, waving that away. "I promise
I won't do anything to harm her, besides, she will only be
carrying my data in her mind for a short time, until the 
Mecha-Washu 3 model is completed."

"Mecha-Washu 3?!" says Washu, incredulously. "After the 
incident with Mecha-Washu 2, I scrapped that whole idea!"

"The idea was scrapped," admits Digital Washu. "However,
the components are still there, and it would take very 
little work for them to be completed. And, I think that we
could be fairly assured of a successful work this time,
since the transfer of software is far easier and far more
reliable than that of mind data."

"Well, I can certainly agree with that," says Washu. "Are
you at least going to wake the others up?"

Digital Washu raises a hand. "Oh, if you insist, Real 
Washu, although, you might want to wait until I've 
contacted the sub-routines that have stored their 
clothing." However, before Washu can say anything, Digital
Washu continues. "Oh, well. I'll just contact them while
I'm waking them up, no problem."

Her brow furrows as if concentrating and her form shimmers
somewhat. At the same time, the life support consoles
attached to each capsule start glowing green instead of 
red. The capsule hatches roll back and the mist releases
into the air.

Tenchi is the first to wake up and he sits up in his 
capsule. "Oh, geez, what a weird dream. I was dreaming--
whaa! What happened to me?!"

Tenchi is looking down at himself, wearing nothing but a 
bed sheet. "Uh, uh, uh--" He snatches up the bedsheet
and knots it around his waist tightly. "Um... Washu, what
the-- another Washu!?" He looks at the subroutine nurse.
"Three Washus? And two with white hair? Um, whichever
one of you is the real Washu, could you explain to me 
what's going on?"

"I am Digital Washu, welcome to Outworld!" says the Washu
dressed in normal, Washu clothes, but with white hair and
spectacles on her nose. "Your clothing will be along 
shortly. The sub-routine units have to repair them after
they tore them off you in haste-- I really must apologize
for what they've done here. You see, it's just so rarely
that I get new specimens to examine."

Tenchi is taking this in all with considerable equanimity,
considering that he is standing there, wearing nothing
but a bed-sheet, in a strange room. "Um, sure. Um, Washu,
what's going on here?"

"Digital Washu just explained that," says Real Washu.

"Oh... " says Tenchi, nodding his head thinking, Oh, my 
God....

Kiyone is the next to wake up. "Oh, what happened? What 
the--" She quickly finds herself wearing nothing but her 
signature headband. "Tenchi, what's going on here?" She 
pulls her legs up in front of her, shielding as much of 
herself as she can. Her face is flushed the color of a 
brick. "I don't know what's going on here, but--"

"Hang on--" Tenchi hops back into his capsule, tears his 
bedsheet in half and hands the other half of it to Kiyone.
"Cover what you can with this, dear." Smiling gratefully,
she knots the torn bed-sheet around her waist and hops out
of the capsule. She moves over to Tenchi and hugs him 
tight. "I'll let you worry about covering my chest."

"Kiyone-yoni....." Tenchi stammers.

The Real Washu moans in disgust. "I don't want to think
about what the two of you will be like after you're 
married!"

By now, Ryoko is awake and she hops out of her capsule,
wearing nothing and not really caring. "Hello, everybody!"
She looks over at Tenchi and Kiyone, noting that she is 
turned around in his embrace and has his hands cupping
her bare breasts. "What are you doing, Tenchi-- oh, I get
the picture." She grins. "Pretty convienient, eh, Tenchi?"

Kyoto is also awakened and he rubs his forehead. "That's
it. I'm never touching saké again, I promise, Lord, I'm 
never touching saké again." He turns to see Sasami curled
up like a ball and tosses her his bedsheet. "Don't worry,
kiddo, here 'ya go." He then generates on himself a velvet
bathrobe.

"Well, Kyoto, I thought you would generate something
a little less tacky," muses Ryoko.

"Oh, come on! You weren't complaining the other night!"
snaps back Kyoto.

"Excuse me, please! Could we please not have this 
conversation?" says Tenchi.

"As long as you two promise not to," quips Ryoko.

Ayeka's face is about the same color strawberry. "What is 
going on here?! I am a princess of Jurai, I will not 
tolerate this--"

"Would you shut up about being the 'Princess of Jurai'?!"
yells Digital Washu's voice.

"Washu, why did you say that to me?" asks Ayeka, 
confusedly. "And how did you get your voice to sound like
so many people?"

"Well, as much as I'd like to say that I said that, Ayeka,
and as much as you deserved to hear it, it wasn't me, " 
explains Real Washu. "You see, that was Digital Washu and
her sub-routines, here."

Nobuyuki is rubbing his stomach. "I'm hungry!"

Katsuhito stretches as he wakes up. "My, that was a nice
nap." It is at about this moment that the sub-routines,
bearing the clothing, show up and, as if by some measure
of good luck, the sub-routines also generate solid force
fields, shielding the women from the men, so that each can
dress in relative privacy.

"Um.... Kyoto, Ryoko, Tenchi, and Kiyone, isn't it? I'd 
like to see you four aside here for a minute," asks Digital
Washu.

Once the five of them are aside in a generated viewing
room, Digital Washu starts playing the two videos of each
couple's copulation side-by-side. Both couples are blushing
redder than strawberries. Right now, Digital Washu is 
focusing on Tenchi an Kiyone's video. In it, they are 
making love in a rather exotic position. Tenchi is grunting
like an animal and Kiyone has her mouth open in a constant
moan of pleasure.

"Now, see here at this frame, Tenchi, if you had performed
the method that Kyoto is performing right here, the 
friction would be reduced by about ten percent. And you,
Kiyone, if your response had been like Ryoko's in frame
five, cell fourteen, the sensitivity ratio would have been
almost doubled!"

"But, we were enjoying ourselves just fine!" protests
Kiyone.

"You actually remember this?" whispers Tenchi.

"No, I don't, but it's just better to play along," whispers
back Kiyone. "Besides," she giggles, "you've never given
me reason to complain before, Tenchi-yon."

Digital Washu frowns. "That's odd. None of you should have
any memories of this. The memory wipe must have been 
incomplete." She then looks at Tenchi strangely. "So, maybe
this means that even though you're not as experienced
as him, since she remembers it.... maybe this means that
you're actually better at this than him!" All of them start
breaking out in sweats. Digital Washu steeples her fingers.
"I'd be honored if you two would submit yourselves
for a second observation!"

"Oh, I don't think so!" snaps Tenchi. "Um, I mean... um, no
thank you. If we were not up to our proper performance,
maybe that was because we're not, um... used

to--"

"Performing for an audience!" breaks in Kiyone.

"That's right," nods Tenchi furiously.

"Oh, quit blushing about it, you two," remarks Ryoko. 
"You're just jealous because the teacher didn't give you a 
good grade for it." She snuggles up to Kyoto.

"Hush, Ryoko," reminds Kyoto. "Remember, what they do is 
our business and not ours."

"That is a very mature attitude to take about it, Mr. 
Kyoto," remarks Digital Washu. "Maybe, you would be kind
enough to train these two into more efficient modes of 
procreation?"

Now, Kyoto is really blushing! "Um... Professor Washu,
I've found that it is always better to let each couple
their peaks on their own!"

"Oh, well. As to you two, Kiyone and Tenchi, if you would
just--"

"Shut up!" They both scream and storm out of the room.

"I think that this would be a good time to end the lesson
for the day, Prof," remarks Kyoto, as he leads Ryoko out of
the room. "People really don't take kindly to having their
sexual performance critiqued, especially by someone who's
there to merely analyze it." The door snicks shut behind
them and Digital Washu stands there alone in the dark.

"But, I was only trying to help!?"



* * *



"Kiyone, what are you so angry about?" asks Ayeka 
conversationally, as Kiyone and Tenchi storm out of the 
room. A minute later, Ayeka is supporting herself against
a wall, holding a nasty, purple bruise on her face. "What
did I say?" she wonders.

Tenchi, a little less angry, says, "Um... you don't want
to, Ayeka, you really don't want to know!"

"If she wants to know, she can come in here and watch the
video for herself!" yells out Digital Washu.

"Digital Washu, I think you've done enough damage for one
day!" retorts Kyoto.

"Oh, but I'm only trying to be helpful!" chirps the 
computer generated Washu. "Oh, Kiyone! I almost forgot
to say, if your response at this juncture had--" WHAP!!
Digital has a bloody nose, or at least she would have one
if Digital Washu was real. Instead, Kiyone has skinned
her knuckles against an orb. And, it is a testament
to both Kiyone's strength and her anger that she managed
to crack the orb.

The orb crackles and sizzles for a minute, then collapses
to the ground.

Tenchi sighs, and whistles. "Kiyone, remind me to never
argue with you about color schemes for the living room."

"If we're going to live in the palace, why would we need
to argue about paint schemes?" asks Kiyone. "I guess it's
a good thing I'm not allergic to plants, though."

A new orb drops out of the ceiling and a moment later,
Digital Washu's form reappears.

"Oh, I thought I was gone!" Everyone just stares at Digital
Washu open mouthed. "Come on, everyone," says Digital
Washu, as if nothing had happened. "I have something
to show you!" She motions towards a darkened doorway,
which everyone quietly walks through. When they come out on
the otherside, they are all dressed in operating scrubs.

"Uh, Digital Washu, why are we dressed like a bunch of 
emergency room doctors?" asks Tenchi.

"Because, silly, you're about to witness an operation!"

"An operation?" says Kiyone. "But, who are you operating--"
Then it hits her. There was one person missing from their
group, one person who they should of noticed having 
disappeared almost immediately. "Mihoshi!"

"Very good, Kiyone," says Digital Washu. She opens her 
mouth to say something more, but a look on Kiyone's face
makes her reconsider.

Digital Washu then snaps her fingers and a section of the
wall in the room becomes transparent. Behind the 
transparency is Mihoshi, lying on the operating table and
being attended by four or five surgical sub-routines.
One of them is tracing a darkened line on her forehead
at he point where the incision would be made.

"Incision Alpha, mark," reports a toneless voice. "Prepare
for incision, now." A second surgical sub-routine
floats up, extends a low-powered laser scalpel, and cuts
open the flap of skin and bone and removes it. "Stand by to
remove sectioned brain area." It extends a delicate-looking
surgical waldo into the hole and removes an almost 
miniscule section of brain tissue.

"Will that be enough room for what you're going to do?" 
asks Kiyone, caught between curiosity at the procedure
and an almost un-warranted concern for her partner.

"Stand-by for installation of receptor and macro-processor
unit," announces the second surgical sub-routine.
The third one, bearing the necessary equipment for 
installation says, "Installing macro-processor
and receptor equipment, now." The tiny pieces of 
electronics and silicon metal are slid neatly into the 
brain area. "Engaging syntho-synaptic connectors...
now." A surgical sub-routine hooks up the unit to the 
normal brain pattern waves by generating an artificial
synapses map which connects the ordinary synapses to the 
artificial ones. "Synapses connection complete. Stand by 
for installation of input/output system," announces
the third surgical sub-routine, floating away.

A fourth one floats up. "Installing input/output
access system.... now." Another piece of metal and 
electronics, looking like a headphone jack is installed
in the neck and micro-connected to the area in the brain
where the macro-processor is.

"Closing up the cranial area... now." A hiss of the laser
scalpel and slight bumping sound of the installation
of artificial bone and synthetic skin, another hiss of the
laser scalpel and Mihoshi's skull looks as good as new. 
Now, the work transfers to the back of her neck where the
data port is being installed.

"Installing synthetic skin," reports the fifth surgical
sub-routine and a flap of synthetic skin is neatly lain 
over the dataport. A second later, a small hole appears
over where the data port is. This can easily be explained
away as a mole or some other skin blemish. "Installation
complete," reports the fifth surgical sub-routine.
"Beginning infusion of pain-killers and desensitizers
to effected areas. Queen Washu, you will be capable of data
transference in about ten units."

"Roger, that," answers Digital Washu. "How long till the 
subject is ready to be move?"

"About five macro units."

"I copy." Digital Washu turns back to the others, who are
relieved that Mihoshi's surgery was successful. "Everyone,
don't worry. Your friends is fine, she's sleeping now. 
She'll be awake in about five hours."

"What was that about a transfer of data?" asks Tenchi.
"What’s it have to do with Mihoshi?" He hesitiates.
"And why did it call you Queen Washu?"

"Well," says Digital Washu cheerily. "Of this entire group
here, she's the one with the most, um..... how do I say 
this..... the most extra empty space up there. So, I 
figured, her as well as anyone. And as for the Queen-thing,
it just does good for my ego." Before anyone can say 
anything else, she snaps a finger and four of the surgical
sub-routines wheel Mihoshi into the room, still asleep
on her hover gurney. A fifth surgical sub-routine
brings up a plug for the data port that is hooked up to one
of the large computer terminals in the room.

"Washu," says Digital Washu, "do me a favor and step over
to that terminal, would you dear?" Dumbfounded, Real Washu
steps over to the terminal. "Now, would you key in the 
numerical sequence, 9-5-9-5-0-0-9." The Real Washu keys in
the numerical sequence, hitting enter with a flourish.
"Now, would you key in the password, Hiesenberg."

"Okay...." The Real Washu types in the password and hits
the enter key.

"And would you please enter the last string. 
0-0-7-pi-9-6-8-0-Euler."

"O-kay." Washu keys in the last string.

"And, hit enter three times."

Beep, Beep, Beep.

All of a sudden, the holographic image of Digital Washu
blinks out of existence and all the orbs fall to the floor,
cracking up as they hit. The terminal starts humming and 
clacking away. Meanwhile, Mihoshi's body starts jolting
on the surgical table, bouncing up and down every couple
of seconds. Nobuyuki is watching this very intently as he 
watches her breasts rise and fall. After about thirty 
seconds, the process is completed and Mihoshi's body comes
to rest on the table. The computer terminal stops whirring
and clacking and goes dead. The Real Washu walks up to 
Mihoshi's body and lays a hand on her shoulder.

"Mihoshi? Mihoshi?" All of a sudden, Mihoshi's normally
bright-blue eyes fly open, only they're not bright blue 
anymore. Washu is looking into a mirror image of her own 
sparkling emerald eyes. And already, Mihoshi's long, curly
blond hair is turning white. Mihoshi/Digital Washu sits up
on the table wearing a hospital gown.

"Well," she says in Digital Washu's voice, "it's not my 
first choice for traveling and accommodations,
but it'll do until we can mecha Washu up and running."
Then, the green eyes take on a far away look and 
Mihoshi/Washu makes a slow turn about the room. "I know all
of you, now." She walks up to Kiyone and Tenchi. "Kiyone,
Tenchi. I was Godmother of your first child." She turns
to Kyoto and Ryoko. "I designed the nursery for your 
third." Next on her list of memory lane walking is Sasami.
"I gave you away at your wedding." She faces Ayeka. "I was
coordinator of your wedding." Nobuyuki is next. 
"Nobuyuki...." Before anyone else can say anything,
Mihoshi/Digital Washu throws her arms around Nobuyuki
and presses her lips to his. She starts rubbing herself
against him, and when she finally break away, her cheeks
are flushed and she murmurs, "Mmmm... you still taste 
good."

"Dad?!" says Tenchi and then he looks at Washu/Mihoshi.
"You're my step-mom?"

Finally, Digital Washu faces Katsuhito. "So many memories,
so much fun. I can't think of where to begin."

"Perhaps it is better if you don't, or those memories
might not happen."

"And I," continues on Washu/Mihoshi, heeding Katsuhito's
warning, "was present when I-- I mean Mihoshi, finally
got her promotion to Director General." At the surprised
look on Kiyone's face, she waves it away by saying, "Of 
course, this was after spending nearly thirty years of 
working my way up from detective lieutenant."

Immediately, Digital Washu/Mihoshi is bombarded with 
questions.

"Who did I marry?" asks Sasami.

"How many children did I have?" asks Ayeka.

"What was our wedding like?" asks Kiyone.

"Whaddya mean, I married Nobuyuki!?" cries Washu.

"Whaddya mean, I married Washu?!" moans Nobuyuki.

"What happened to us?!" ask Ryoko and Kyoto simultaneously.

"How long did Kiyone and I live?" asks Tenchi. He adds this
almost as an afterthought, "And, did we stay married all 
that time?"

"Um, does anyone else notice the walls shaking?" This comes
from Katsuhito and everyone else looks at the walls. They
are indeed shaking.

"Oh, no!" cries Mihoshi/Digital Washu. "I'd totally 
forgotten! Once my essence was transferred into Mihoshi's
body, my lab here is starting to collapse! We must leave
immediately!" They all rush for the exits, only to remember
that there is really no place else for them to go.

"How do we get out of here?" asks Nobuyuki.

"Let me handle that, darling," she says. Digital Washu 
gestures to the rope. "Ah, Washu, my real counterpart,
good thinking of you. The question is, will we all have 
enough time?"

"Everyone, get moving," commands Tenchi.

"I'll be right back!" Digital Washu disappears back into
her lab.

"Oh, no! What's she doing now?!" yells Tenchi.

"Don't worry about her, get yourselves up the rope!" 
advises Kyoto.

Sasami and Ryo-ohki are the first ones boosted up the rope
and they begin climbing as fast as they can. Washu is next
up, followed by Kiyone and then Ayeka. Ryoko, meanwhile,
has already floated up the portal and is busy helping
the people out of the portal onto the ground. After the 
last of the girls have gone, Nobuyuki begins climbing
up and Tenchi looks at Katsuhito.

"Come on, grandpa, get going!"

"No, Tenchi. I'll remain behind to make sure that everyone
else makes it out."

"Okay, none of us has to remain behind!" Digital Washu in 
Mihoshi's body comes rushing back. "Come on you two, scoot,
scoot, scoot!"

Kyoto, totally forgotten about, swoops down, grabs all 
three of them and levitates out of the hole. He drops them
on the ground and stops to rub his back.

"Ah, geez! That's the last time I try to move three people
at once!"

"Okay, everyone, get back to Chisako!" yells Tenchi.

Once assured that everyone is present and accounted
for, Kyoto yanks his sword out of the ground, grips it in 
both hands, raises it above his head, and yells, "Come to 
me, my Chisako!" Several cracks of thunder and a 
bluish-green swirl of energy later, his giant space station
appears overhead. "Chisako," he yells, "bring us all up!"
All of a sudden, the entire group disappears and reappears
on the command deck of Chisako. They are all relieved
to see that Azaka and Kamidake are already safely aboard.

"Well, this is all fine and dandy," responds Ryoko. "But,
that doesn't change the fact that we're all trapped her 
anyway!"

"No, we're not." Everyone turns to look at Mihoshi/Digital
Washu. She pulls an access cable out from a pocket. "Kyoto,
hook me up to the helm systems."

"Okay..." says Kyoto skeptically. He leads Mihoshi/Washu
over to the control center on the deck, seats her and takes
one end of the cord, kneels down, opens a plate in the 
floor and plugs it into the access port. He takes the other
plug and sticks it in her neck. She then closes her eyes
and sets her hands on the helm controls.

"Don't worry, folks. I worked out the time-space flux 
algorithms a long time a-- Wait the-- What the heck?! Some
kind of outside signal is overriding the fold-drive
codes!"

"Don't worry," responds Kyoto. "Type in the override
code sequence, niner-niner-alpha-Ryoko."

Ryoko perks up at the mention of her name. "Oh, you named
an override code after me? How sweet!"

Meanwhile, Mihoshi/Washu, taps the sequence code into the
console. "No, response!"

"Okay, then. Try override code, zero-zero-zero-one."

"Zero-zero-zero-one... Nothing!" Mihoshi/Washu turns back
to glare at Kyoto. "Are you sure you haven't changed your
override codes and just forgotten about them?" Digital
Washu/Mihoshi continues to stare at the controls. And all
of a sudden, a look of realization sweeps over her face.
"Oh, my God! They've taken total control!"

"You mean, they're stranding us to die here?" asks Tenchi.

Mihoshi/Digital Washu shakes her head. "No, no. We're 
folding, but I'm not controlling the destination or 
anything! They're flying us remotely!"

"You mean, we're headed off to another unknown 
destination?" says Katsuhito, flatly.

Mihoshi/Digital Washu nods. "That's about the size of it."
She turns around and looks at the group. "Now, to answer
your questions. Tenchi, I'll start with you. You and Kiyone
lived to be nearly twenty-thousand years old, and yes, you
stayed happily married the entire time."

She manages a slight smile. "You see, your love for one 
another is something that time itself couldn't wear away.
You have an impenetrable love that even the destruction
of the universe itself couldn't damage. Your love for each
other will continue on long after your bodies have returned
to dust." Kiyone and Tenchi, looks of unutterable
happiness and relief on their faces, are hugging and 
kissing each other fiercely.

"Now, who is next?..... Oh, yes, Kyoto and Ryoko. You two
ended up killing each other." At the astonished looks on 
their faces, she says, "Just kidding. You married and had
children and were very much like Tenchi and Kiyone, only
you stayed on Earth, even after Tenchi pardoned you two--"

Kyoto looks surprised. "Pardoned?" "Yes, it was a wedding
present, besides the money." She then turns to Nobuyuki,
and blushes. Shifting into a seductive pose, she asks, 
"Would you like me to give you a private explanation?"

Nobuyuki is about to agree when he catches himself. "Uh,
maybe later, thanks."

"I don't want a private explanation!" fumes the real Washu.

"Oh, all right. It would take too long to explain, but the
gist of it is, you fell in love and got married. Now, 
Kiyone, of course your and Tenchi's wedding was quite big.
After all, the new Emperor and Empress of the Republic
of Jurai--and the event being combined with the coronation,
to boot? Oh, yeah, and it was a combination 
Megamian-Juraian wedding."

Digital Washu's gaze shifts over to Ayeka. "You, my dear,
had twelve daughters, but no sons. Sort of sad, really,
but you and your husband had no complaints." And last is 
Sasami. "Sasami, you found the man of your dreams, only to
find that you were the girl of his dreams. Ironically
enough, it was Kyoto's first son." She heads for the hatch.
"If you'll excuse me, I'm going to try and find out where
we're going."



                                  THE END







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