NOTE: All characters original to the Tenchi-Muyo! TV1 series
portrayed in this story are the sole property of AIC and Pioneer
Animation. Any appearance of them in actual life is purely 
coincidental. Tenchi-Muyo! material and paraphernalia
listed within is Copyright Pioneer Animation 1997 (c). Kyoto
Minamoto, Muriyaki Kushiragi, Chisako, Chi-Ohki, and all other
related characters are the sole property of Joe (Chi-Ohki)
McKenzie and appear through permission from Joe (Chi-Ohki)
McKenzie.

 

Episode #18:

No Need For A Mirror Image! --Part 2

 

 

"Hmm....." Washu glances over her display as the scanning
device moves back and forth over the second Kiyone. The second
Kiyone is lying on a hospital-style bed, completely naked. 

Off to one side, Tenchi is gulping and doing his best to keep
his mind focused on rational things. He is having limited 
success, as every so often a lewd fantasy pops up in his mind. 

Clinging to her husband's arm, the "real" Kiyone is blushing
heavily, for a number of reasons. 

"This tickles!" the second Kiyone giggles as the scanner moves
back and forth over her body. "Especially down here!" and she 
makes a gesture at her lower body. 

Tenchi almost swallows his tongue and covers both his ears. The
first Kiyone buries her face deeply in Tenchi's shirt and 
attempts to hide her redness. 

Washu moans and turns her gaze back to her hololaptop.
"Hmmm.... this is interesting." She turns to Kyoto. "Kyoto,
it's been eight hours. I thought you said your shells were 
supposed to... disappear... after six." 

Kyoto nods in agreement. Washu running in and pulling him out,
and telling him that there were now two Kiyones again, had 
interrupted his and Ryoko's reunion almost immediately.
"I know. Normally, they either explode or just melt into a nasty
puddle. What's this one doing?" 

"Growing internal organs." 

"Impossible! She's only made up of psyonic energy!" 

"Well, whatever she's made up of, she's becoming completely
real, and fast! Look at this." She indicates one of the holo 
screens. "Aside from your own incipient DNA strands, this Kiyone
is almost indistinguishable from the real one." 

"Can I get up now, Washu? This is really starting to do 
something I would rather it not." 

"Yuck! I'll turn it off right now! You can get up now." 

"Thank you." The second Kiyone literally bounces to her feet.
Tenchi closes his eyes and begins to pray quietly. 

The second Kiyone winks at Tenchi as she pulls on the robe Washu
had given her. It's sized for Washu's "adolescent" body, so it 
barely hides the important areas. "Come on, daddy, let's go 
upstairs and play a game." 

The first Kiyone buries her face in her hands and moans quietly.
"This is too much..." 

"Yuck! This is frightening! Kiyone, your duplicate is acting
exactly like you!" Washu declares. 

Tenchi moans inwardly and slowly begins to inch his way out of 
the room. "Uhh... uh... Kiyone...." 

"Yes, daddy? And don't you mean ‘Kiyone-yoni?'" 

Tenchi groans and steps up his pace out of the lab, almost 
leaving his wife behind. Once out, he picks Kiyone up and starts
running. He doesn't stop until he's out of the house and hiding
in one of the arboretum decks. He has almost come to a stop when
he trips on a root and falls on his back. Kiyone is catapulted
into the air and lands on her husband, pushing a whompf of 
breath from his lungs.

The first Kiyone is very flushed and is heaving. After a moment,
she slowly begins to kiss her way up Tenchi's neck, nibbling
on his ear as she works her way around towards his lips. 
"Tenchi... I'm hungry...." 

As always, Tenchi is putty in his Kiyone-yoni's hands. He shifts
around until he's on top of her, his hands cupping the small
of her back. Murmuring her delight, she wraps her legs around
Tenchi's waist and rolls over, so that he's lying on his back
and she's straddling him. Tenchi is slowly beginning to unbutton
her blouse--

--"Tenchi-yon, there you are!" Both of them look up to see the
other Kiyone floating a couple of meters above them. "You left
me all alone in Washu's dark, damp lab!" Without warning,
she grabs the first Kiyone up by the arm and flings her several
hundred meters off into the distance. Tenchi starts to rise onto
his feet, but the second Kiyone, who floats down on top of him,
forces him back down to the soft green grass. 

"Come on, daddy, you promised you'd teach me a new game!" she 
pouts.

Tenchi's body is unaware of any differences between this Kiyone
and the other one, and is reacting as such. However, his mouth
still works, when not being covered by hers, and so does his 
brain. "K-K-Kiyone-yoni..." 

"Yes, daddy?" 

"P-P-Please get off of me. I have to go get the other Kiyone." 

"But I'm your Kiyone-yoni, you can just forget about that other
floozy." 

"Um, actually..." Tenchi cannot finish his sentence for his 
mouth is covered with hers again and her tongue is probing
around inside. Finally, he manages to work his way out from 
under her. Tearing his mouth away from hers--with more 
reluctance than he'd like to admit--he says, "I'm sorry, but I 
have to get the other Kiyone!"

"I'm right here, Tenchi-yon!" This comes from the "real" Kiyone,
who has come stumbling up. She is completely intact, although
completely soaked. Catching sight of Tenchi, she runs up and 
hugs him. "There you are."

"Hey! What do you think you're doing with my husband?" cries
out the second Kiyone. "He was being naughty with me!"

"No, he was making love to me!" yells back the first Kiyone.

"Well, he would have made love to me if you hadn't interrupted
us!" the second one retorts.

"Well, he didn't, so if you'll just go away...." The first 
Kiyone makes a dismissive gesture, then smiles at her husband
while taking his arm. "C'mon, Tenchi-yon, let's go to bed."

The second Kiyone grabs Tenchi's other arm. "He's going to make
love to me because I said so!" 

In a tightly controlled voice, the first Kiyone hisses, "Let go
of him, you.... just let go of him." 

The second one tightens her grip and teleports both her and 
Tenchi up into the branches of a tree. "Stay here, daddy, your
little girl is gonna take care of the big bad witch." 

"Please don't fight!" begs Tenchi. 

"Oh, but we must! We've got to settle this!" The second Kiyone
teleports back down to ground level and shifts forms. A black
and green fighting outfit similar to Ryoko's replace her robe. 

Narrowing her eyes, the first Kiyone changes to her Juraian
combat mode. She holds out her right hand, and Reiken appears
in it, its jade-white blade igniting even as she closes her hand
around the hilt. Three Light Hawk Wings appear in front of her,
like a glowing blue-white propeller. 

The second Kiyone arches an eyebrow. "Impressive. Now, watch
mine." She holds out her left hand, and three green-white
Light Hawk Wings appear out of nowhere. Instead of appearing
in formation in front of this Kiyone, however, they fly in 
spinning and lock into place in front of the second Kiyone with
a loud click. She closes her left hand into a fist, and an 
energy broadsword identical to Kyoto's appears.

The two Kiyone's begin to slowly circle each other, occasionally
lashing out at each other with their swords. The shimmering
Light Hawk Wings easily stop the blades, unstoppable though
they are, of both woman's sword. 

By now, Tenchi has managed to make his way down the tree. His 
feet hit the ground just in time to see his wife and her 
duplicate start hacking at each other in earnest. Pulling up his
own Light Hawk Wings, he rushes at both women. "Stop fighting!
Damn it, Kiyone-yoni --both of you-- stop fighting!" 

The two Kiyones stop for a moment and look at Tenchi. The first
is about to rush to him, but the second holds her right hand out
at him. Tenchi suddenly finds himself flying back through the 
air and slamming into the trunk of a tree. 

Ropes of energy suddenly appear around him, tightening.
He opens his mouth to yell again, but an energy sword suddenly
appears in it, blocking any outbursts he might make. "We need
to fight, daddy, or neither of us will be happy. Now, you stay
right there and we'll be done soon enough and then we can play
with daddy." 

With that, the two girls go back to fighting. It quickly becomes
apparent that they are evenly matched --after all, they're
both Kiyone. Yet, the combat goes on for more than an hour, 
until Mirei and the guardian Azaka come up. 

"Lunch is ready!" calls out Mirei cheerily, holding up the large
tray with silver teacups and pot on it. Azaka has a large picnic
basket in a magnetic hover around him. 

All at once, the two Kiyones stop fighting and sit down, 
graciously accepting the proffered food and tea. About halfway
through her first sandwich, the second Kiyone remembers that 
Tenchi is still tied to the tree and snaps her fingers. Tenchi
immediately collapses to the ground, gasping for air. He 
cautiously makes his way over to the small clearing where Mirei
and Azaka are resting with the two Kiyones. "Um... did I miss
something?" 

"No, daddy, we just were getting ready for you," bubbles the 
second Kiyone. 

At the confused look on Tenchi's face, the first Kiyone takes
it upon herself to explain things to her --their-- husband.
"You see, Tenchi-yon, we just had some aggressions to work out."
She smiles at the second Kiyone, who smiles back. "We really
don't hate each other. It'll just take a little while to get 
used to two of us being here." 

Tenchi nods in understanding. "Okay... but what'd the other 
Kiyone mean by 'getting ready for me'?" 

"Well, we're your little girls, right?" 

"Yeah..."

"Well, fighting allowed us to stretch out and get good and 
sweaty. You know, kinda like volleyball." 

Tenchi gulps as the analogy makes itself clear. "You.... you two
are.... serious?" 

The two Kiyones nod their heads in synch. 

This sets Tenchi ashake, and he spills some of his tea in his 
lap. "Argh! Dammit--oww!" The second cry of pain comes when 
Mirei stomps on his foot. "Oww.... Rei-cha'ya, what was that 
for?"

"Don't talk naughty!" she scolds.

"Nngh....okay, but why'd you stomp on my foot?" he asks.

"Because you were talking dirty!" From nowhere, the youngest
Masaki daughter produces a bar of soap and sticks it in Tenchi's
mouth. "Now, take a bite, Daddy."

Tenchi obediently bites down, wincing, as he tastes the soap.
"Irish Spring?"

"That should be Ivory," corrects Mirei, and she suddenly yelps
as Tenchi pulls her into his lap and hugs her. Giggling happily,
she hugs him back. "Good daddy."

"Hey, Tenchi-yon," teases the first Kiyone, "Are you gonna be 
naughty with Rei-cha'ya?"

"Yeah, daddy, what about us?" pouts the second Kiyone.

"What did you two have in mind?" asks Tenchi conversationally.

"We were thinking about.... going swimming," answers the first
Kiyone, grinning widely.

Tenchi finds himself returning the smile, and mentally snaps
at his libido to hold on for a moment. "Oh? That does sound like
fun. But, ah.... where are your swimsuits?"

"Who needs swimsuits.... Daddy?" says the second Kiyone, playing
with the sash of her robe.

Mirei shakes her head. "I'm gonna go do the dishes." 

Tenchi gives Mirei a quick hug. "Thank you, Rei-cha'ya." 

"No problem, daddy, just clean up after yourselves." She smiles
as she watches her two mothers pull her father in the direction
of a secluded clearing. Her father is not struggling in the 
least. "They're gonna be naughty!"

 

* * *

 

"Whaddya' mean we can't fold?!" Kyoto looks like he's all too 
willing to carry out the nasty custom of killing the bearer
of bad tidings. 

The real Washu steps back several meters as green-white
energy begins to crackle off Kyoto's body. "Calm down, before
you have a stroke or your head pops off." 

Kyoto reluctantly lowers his hands and begins to count to ten,
very slowly and very loudly. By the time he's finished, a 
modicum of tranquility has returned. "Alright, why can't we 
fold?" 

"If you would just follow me..." The real Washu leads him over
to the clearsteel viewport and points down at the number five
saucer. "That's why." The saucer, albeit intact, is bent around
so that it is firmly jammed against the main hub. "With the 
saucer bent in like that, Chisako cannot fold without high risk
of rotation motor burnout. In other words, if we attempt a fold,
we could get stuck in interdimensional space, or be scattered
across all of the universes as free particles, or even deliver
ourselves right into the evil Kyoto's throne room." 

Kyoto takes up a thoughtful pose. "Well, now, that wouldn't
be too helpful, would it?" 

"You have a gift for understatement," quips Digital Washu with
a straight face.

"How long to repair it?" asks Kyoto, staring off into the abyss
of space. 

"Approximately... 4 months, give or take a week. That's not all,
however."

"What else could go wrong?" bellows Kyoto, having been dragged
out of his relatively docile state. 

"We need a nuclear bomb!" 

Kyoto stares at her, open mouthed, for about a minute. Finally,
he says in a hopeful voice, "You're joking, right?" 

The two Washus shake their heads in unison. 

Kyoto sighs and starts massaging his temples. "Shit. At least
Tomoko bugged out right after the battle. You two know where
it went?"

"Yeah, it didn't get far. With one saucer ripped free and 
several other punctures in the hull, they couldn't have gotten
more than 1,000 parsecs from here. And that was probably a 
one-way trip." 

"Right, right. Now, tell me why you need a nuke?" 

"Well, normally, I would fabricate one right here in my lab. 
However, I cannot replicate all the imperfections of a 
mid-twentieth-century American nuclear device... given our 
current situation. All my resources will be turned towards
repairing the saucer connection and recharging the food-cyclers.
Digital Washu's lab was left behind in Outworld and we don't
have the time or the means of going back to get anything from
it. So, naturally, we need to.... procure.... one from this 
Earth." 

Kyoto starts rubbing his temples again. "Okay.... but still,
why do you need a friggin' nuke?!"

"Simple, really. We require the fission reaction created by an 
old nuclear bomb to trigger a time-space anomaly within the 
temporal drive. How much do you know about your ship's engines?" 

"Only enough to do basic maintenance." 

"You kept the reactor running all the time, correct?"

"Yeah, there wasn't anyway to deactivate it." 

"It's just as well. The reactor's constant activity maintained
the anomaly at all times. The recent battle with Tomoko jammed
the saucers. Chisako's electrical motors pulled extra power to 
compensate, to try to continue spinning the saucers. The amount
of power pulled sapped a lot of the other systems on board--
including the system responsible for maintaining the anomaly.
The power level devoted to that dropped below nominal levels,
and the anomaly sputtered out. We need a nuke to recreate
the anomaly. Got it?" 

"Nope, I don't get it at all." Washu pulls out a large trout
and starts smacking Kyoto around until he yells, "Okay, okay,
I understand!" 

 

* * *

 

Mirei steps out of the kitchen holding a tray full of her latest
culinary creations. "Here, everybody! Here's breakfast!"

In her hands is a tray of freshly baked apples stuffed with 
cinnamon and sugar and basted in cherry sauce. 

There is a collective intake of breath and some subtle licking
of lips as their eyes follow the food. Mirei walks around to 
each one of them seated at the table and places a baked apple
on their plate. In some cases, the apple is gone before she has
completed her rounds. 

The only ones not immediately tearing into their food are 
Tsunami and Sasami, who merely look down at it and take dainty
bites. Mirei looks at them worriedly for a moment before seating
herself and starting to eat. 

Ayeka looks around the table. "Funny, but aren't we missing
a few people?" 

Ryoko nods and says between bites of her apple, "Yeah. They must
be--"

"Being naughty!" interrupts Mirei.

"Well," replies Ryoko, "I was going to say sleeping in, but 
yours is probably more accurate." 

Ayeka blushes and quietly returns to eating her breakfast. 

Nobuyuki hangs his head. "My son has become far too much like
his father. I need to talk to him about these sort of things." 

Washu shoots him a glance, which quickly quiets him. 

"When are they coming down?" asks Mihoshi with her chopsticks
hanging out of the corner of her mouth. 

As if on cue (we use too many of these in an episode), the two
Kiyones, dressed in short shorts and half-buttoned nightshirts,
come down the stairs carrying Tenchi in between them. Tenchi
is dressed-- sort of-- in magenta boxers and a half-on tank top
reading "I saved the universe and all I got was this stupid
T-shirt." He isn't quite conscious right now, but he has a smile
on his face as wide as the Milky Way. 

Everyone around the table is having trouble stifling laughs
and giggles.

As the two Kiyones seat their husband between them, Nobuyuki
sniffs the air and recognizes the scent. "Tenchi! Why did you 
get drunk?!" 

There is a collective facefault. 

The first one to recover is Ayeka. "Err.... Grandfather
Nobuyuki*, I.... um.... are you sure that's alcohol you're 
smelling?" 

Mirei giggles. "Yeah, I think daddy got drunk on mommies." 

Ryoko bursts out laughing and topples over backwards. When she
has herself settled again, she manages to stammer, "That's
one way to describe it!" 

The group continues to laugh riotously until Tenchi is finally
conscious. 

"What's so funny?" he asks. 

"Just talking about the trouble you have staying awake, Tenchi,"
teases Ryoko. 

"Having your dreams come true must keep you up late," comments
Kyoto, placing his hands behind his head and crossing his legs. 

"Mm-hmm! Daddy is very naughty! And while I was sleeping in 
their room!" Mirei agrees, much to Tenchi's chagrin. 

The two Kiyones giggle and nuzzle up against Tenchi.

"Oh, god...." Tenchi moans, and his face goes red.

"Naughty! And while you're at the breakfast table too!" scolds
Mirei. 

"Yeah, Uncle Tenchi! You should learn how to control yourself!"
laughs Momoko. 

This conversation is ended prematurely when Katsuhito clears
his throat. "So, what is our plan to repair Chisako, and solve
our problems with the evil Kyoto?" 

"One problem at a time," replies Tenchi, rubbing his forehead.
"I could use some coffee."

"All we have is tea," pipes up Mirei. She offers a cup to her 
father, who takes it gratefully and sips. 

Ayeka takes note of Tenchi's movements, which are rather stiff
and labored. "Err.... Tenchi, why are you so stiff? Do you need
a masseuse?" 

At this, Kyoto spills his tea into his lap. He is so shocked
by the apparent boldness of Ayeka's statement that it takes 
Ryoko tugging on his arm to tell him that there's scalding
liquid in his lap. Once he realizes this-- "--Ah f**k! Damn it,
damn it-- Ow!" 

Mirei slams her heel down on Kyoto's toes again. "No dirty 
language!" She shoves a bar of soap into her Uncle Kyoto's
mouth. "Take a bite!" 

Kyoto does as he's told. "Dial." 

"It was supposed to be Zest!" Mirei looks rather distraught
over this, so one of the Kiyones pulls her into their lap and 
hugs her. 

"There, there, Rei-cha'ya, it's alright, we know you tried your
hardest." 

"Thank you, mommy.... are you my mommy number one or number
two?" 

"Number one." 

Mirei smiles and rests her head on her mother's shoulder. 

Ryoko leans up to her husband's ear and whispers, "When are you
going to make my dream come true?" 

"This evening, when we're alone at home." 


* * *

 

"And you just left them there?!" The boiling anger of the evil
Kyoto is something to behold-- and to avoid at all costs. He has
been punching holes in bulkheads --and a few unlucky 
technicians-- ever since Tomoko had limped back to its 
rendezvous point with Akiko. 

In contrast to their liege's fiery temper, the evil Nagi and 
Washu are icily calm. When Kyoto has finally finished ranting,
Washu says, "My Lord, it makes little difference. They are 
stranded where we left them. They cannot fold, and we will be 
able to track them with conventional FTL drives. And even that
they cannot do." 

Kyoto has gotten his temper under control by now, and he nods
curtly. "Fine, fine... so, what do you suggest we do?" 

"Simple. If they land on Earth let our Terran allies take care
of them. It'll be a simple job with the weapons we've given 
them." 

Kyoto quirks an eyebrow. "You do know that if they destroy
Chisako, they will undoubtedly destroy themselves as well. You
did say those ships would explode with enough energy to wipe out
a small star system?"

"Quite. But weren't we going to destroy them once their 
usefulness was exhausted anyway? This merely, as the Earthers
say, kills two birds with one stone." 

An evil smile slowly forms on Kyoto's face. "Very well. Proceed
as you see fit." 

 

* * *

 

"Kiyone-yoni! I don't want to go through our daughters'
stuff!" Tenchi is struggling every bit as hard as he was on the
day that Kiyone had convinced him to help her spy on their 
daughters in the bath. 

"Would you prefer trying to spy on them in the bath again? This
way, the worst you'll see is a discarded bra or a pair of 
panties." Kiyone grins at the expression of pain on her 
husband's face. "Tenchi-yon, thinking naughty about our 
daughters when you should be thinking naughty about me and the
other Kiyone!"


"Kiyone-yoni...."

Kiyone giggles and whispers something in his ear that makes him
turn beet red. "Now, will you help me?" 

"Of course," he sighs. "Good thing they're on the other side of
the ship right now. Are you sure you didn't want the other 
Kiyone in on this?"

"She's watching the girls for us with Mirei. If she sees them
headed for the house, she'll tell us mentally." 

Tenchi nods reluctantly. "Right, well, let's get this over 
with." He pushes open the door to Sasami and Tsunami's bedroom.
As Kiyone had said, there are several discarded undergarments
scattered throughout the room on various pieces of furniture. 

"Everything looks pretty normal," says Tenchi, deliberately
averting his gaze from a silky blue teddy hanging on the 
bathroom door handle. 

Kiyone nods and is about to voice her agreement when she feels
something tugging on her hands. She looks up and gasps as she 
sees Sasami and Tsunami, blank expressions on their faces. 
"Girls! What are you--"

She gasps again as her view of the room suddenly changes. 

All artificial light is gone, and Tenchi has disappeared,
although she can still hear his calm voice speaking. In the 
semi-darkness, she can make out literally hundreds of candles
surrounding her and the girls. 

She looks down, and almost screams as she realizes that she and
her daughters are hovering above the floor, just centimeters
above a triangle-within-a-circle emblem of candles on the floor.
The very tops of the candles' flames fall just short of their
feet. In the background, she can hear low chanting. 

As she looks around the room, she sees one of the walls 
literally melting away. Behind it, she can see, as if in the 
far-off distance, a fire, built in the shape of the same emblem
she and her daughters are floating atop. Again, the setting
is dimly lit, but she can barely make out the features of the 
three goddesses. 

The chanting grows louder, and she begins to discern figures
dancing around the fire. The figures grow more and more 
substantial, and her heart breaks again as she recognizes
two faces in particular. 

Ryoji and Misaki Makibi.

"Mommy.... Daddy... help me, I'm scared...." she whimpers.
The fear from that dream about her uncle Azusa returns tenfold,
and she's desperate for a way out--any way out--

The spirits of her parents appear to pay her no mind. There are,
however, some that have not forgotten her. Sasami and Tsunami
both grab her left hand she feels a warm, pulsing sensation
on the back of it. Looking into her eyes with a frightening
intensity, they say as one, "You are one of the chosen ones."

They abruptly pull their hands away from hers, and Kiyone looks
down to see a glowing triangle-within-a-circle
on the back of her hand. She screams--

-- "Kiyone-yoni!" Tenchi spins on his heel and gapes in horror
as he sees his wife crumple to the floor. He reaches her just
in time and pulls her to her feet, wrapping his arms around
her. "Oh, Kiyone-yoni, are you all right?"

Kiyone slowly realizes that the room she had just been in--and
the people, both living and dead, in it--has vanished, and she's
back in her daughters' room, in her husband's arms.... she 
bursts into tears, burying her face in Tenchi's chest. He pulls
her closer. 

"What happened?" he asks.

"I.... I...." Kiyone starts to tell Tenchi exactly what she 
experienced, but she suddenly finds those memories gone, as if 
someone had drawn an eraser across that part of her mind. "I 
don't remember.... Tenchi-yon, I don't remember...."

"Shh, shh...." Tenchi gently picks Kiyone up in his arms and 
carries her to the door. "It's okay, Kiyone-yoni, everything's
gonna be okay...."

 

* * *

 

"You'll be fine, Kiyone. You just need some rest and plenty
of fluids. Have Mirei make you some orange juice-- or pineapple
juice-- or whatever you prefer. Have a large glass every 2 hours
and call me in the morning." Washu notes the subtle glance 
between Tenchi and Kiyone and yells, "And that does not include
bodily fluids!" 

Kiyone moans and hangs her head slightly. "Yes, little Washu." 

"Thank you, little Kiyone. Now, go to bed --without your 
husband's assistance, please." Washu watches her stepson and 
step-daughter-in-law walk out of the room, and shakes her head.
"Somehow, I don't think they're going to follow my instructions
to the letter." 

Tenchi carries Kiyone up to bed, tucks her in, and goes 
downstairs to make her some juice. He is carrying out a tray of
mango juice when he sees the second Kiyone and Mirei walk 
through the door. 

"Yoni**, Rei-cha'ya." He walks over to his "other" wife and 
youngest daughter. For reasons of simplification, he has taken
to calling the original Kiyone "Kiyone-yoni", and the second
one simply "yoni." "There you two are." He hugs Mirei briefly
and kisses the second Kiyone on the lips. Yoni closes her eyes
and allows her body to relax while hers and Tenchi's lips are 
pressed against one another. 

"Naughty!" scolds Mirei. "You two are being naughty right in 
front of me! And without the other mommy too!" 

"Hush, Rei-cha'ya," mutters Yoni before pressing her lips back
against Tenchi's for a moment. "Now, where's your other little
girl, daddy?"

"The other Kiyone's upstairs, taking a nap," explains Tenchi.
"Something scared her this afternoon, but she can't remember
what." 

"Is she all right?" asks Mirei worriedly.

"She's fine," assures Tenchi, "but Washu recommended that she 
get some rest." He hugs Mirei again. "Rei-cha'ya, why don't you
take that tray of mango juice up to your first mother and tell
her will be up soon?"

"Okay, Daddy," agrees Mirei. "Behave yourselves while I'm gone!"
She takes the tray and hurries up the stairs. Tenchi then turns
to his second wife and smiles wryly. "Yoni, did you or 
Rei-cha'ya see Nami-cha'ya or Sami-cha'ya at all today?"

Yoni shakes her head. "Uh-uh, why?" 

"Just curious." Tenchi leans in and kisses Yoni again. "Mmm....
hungry?" 

"Uh-huh.... would you like me to fix us some dinner?"

"That would be nice of you, Yoni," agrees Tenchi. "Would you get
some for Kiyone-yoni and Rei-cha'ya too?" 

"Sure thing." Yoni walks off into the kitchen as Mirei returns
to the living room. "Where's mommy number two?" 

"She's fixing dinner," answers Tenchi. "I'll go up and see if 
your first mother is hungry." 

"Don't be naughty with her!"

 

* * *

 

As it turns out, the first Kiyone isn't very hungry, just having
Mirei bring a small tray of food and then going back to sleep.

After they're finished, Tenchi and Yoni are preparing to head
up to bed when Washu pulls them into her lab. "Oh no you two 
don't. That Kiyone needs her rest."

Tenchi glares at his stepmother. "Washu, are you implying
that I can't control myself for one night?"

Washu raises an eyebrow, challenging him to prove her wrong.

Tenchi snorts. "That's not funny, Washu."

"Yeah," agrees Yoni. "Washu, we're perfectly capable of 
controlling our sex drives when we need to."

"Sure you are," replies Washu, in a voice that is dripping
with skepticism. "But humor me. Mirei will stay with Kiyone
tonight. You two just go and stay in one of the spare rooms."

After a moment, Tenchi nods and leads Yoni towards one of the 
spare rooms. Neither of them is in much of an amorous mood 
without Kiyone, so they fall asleep almost immediately,
snuggled together.

 

* * *

 

"Uh!" The first Kiyone sits up in bed, her heart racing. 

She had just had a dream about her experience with her two elder
daughters that afternoon. 

This dream, however, had been far bloodier. 

She can only remember bits and pieces clearly. But she is almost
certain her father had been... having his way with her. 

She had also remembered her mother having rather violent 
intercourse with a shadowy figure, who had been digging his 
nails in her back and tearing bloody furrows into her skin. 

In fact, her own daughters had been rubbing themselves against
her and touching certain regions of her body, parts she only 
lets one--now two, she corrects herself--person touch.

Mirei awakens instantly, and moves from her bedroll to her 
mother's side on the bed. "Are you okay, Mommy?" 

Kiyone breaths in and out raggedly for a few minutes before
her head starts to clear, then she hugs Mirei. "I think so, 
sweetie." 

Mirei hugs Kiyone back. "Do you want me to go get Daddy and the
other Mommy?" 

Kiyone smiles and pats Mirei on the head. "I'll be fine, 
Rei-cha'ya." 

"I'll be right back!" Mirei climbs off the bed and heads out the
door before Kiyone can stop her. She returns a few minutes
later, Tenchi and Yoni in tow. 

Kiyone smiles slightly. "Tenchi-yon, Yoni, you two didn't have
to come up here." Smiling, Tenchi and Yoni sit on the bed, 
hugging Kiyone between them.

"We're not going to let you suffer alone in your time of need,
Kiyone-yoni," assures Tenchi, kissing his first wife on her 
forehead.

"That's right," agrees Yoni. 

Mirei looks inquisitively at her three parents. "Can I trust
you three not to be naughty tonight?" 

They nod. 

"Okay, goodnight." Mirei kisses each of them goodnight and steps
out the door. The last thing she sees before closing the door
is the three of them hugging and snuggling beneath the covers. 

 

* * *

 

"It's simple, really!" Washu boasts the next morning, as she 
finishes her presentation to Kyoto.

"So, basically, you want me to splash Chisako down into the 
middle of the Pacific Ocean?"

"Uh, huh!" The diminutive scientist chirps as she squeezes
her eyes shut and attempts to make herself look cute. 

Her attempts are completely lost on Kyoto, and she gives up 
after a moment.

"Okay, normally, this would be relatively easy. I'd just throw
the saucers into a reversed spin and allow the gravity engines
gently lower us into the murky depths. However--" Kyoto gestures
out the view port and the twisted saucer "--We can't do that 
because the saucers are jammed in a stationary position.
We were fortunate that Chi-ohki, Ken-ohki, and Ryo-ohki were 
with us. If it wasn't for them, Chisako would be floating
dead in the middle of space, a sitting target for Akiko to come
and pluck off at its own leisure!"

"Surely, you must have a back-up landing system on Chisako..."

"Yes! But it's a solid-fuel rocket system."

"Meaning?" 

"Meaning that it only works once. Once we land, we're stuck 
there until we can effect repairs or find some other means to 
lift Chisako off the planet's surface! If we cannot repair 
Chisako's saucer, we've effectively dug ourselves a nice watery
grave!"

"So, what's the problem?" This remark sends Kyoto into a fit of
rage. It takes several minutes before he's calmed himself down
enough to speak again.

"Listen to me, Washu, if we use this landing system and find 
that we cannot repair Chisako, we are effectively stuck on the
bottom of the sea and a prime target for anyone who wants to pop
us off."

Washu does her impression of an erupting volcano, making 
everyone on the command deck take a step back. "Shut up! You 
never listened to me when I taught at the Academy and you rarely
listen to me now, so do me a favor and shut up!"

"Okay," says Kyoto, attempting to sound penitent.

Washu breathes heavily for a few seconds before finally 
regaining her calm. "Alright, you twit, listen up! Using my 
latest in antigravity and strength enhancing equipment,
you, me and Digital Washu should have no trouble detaching
saucer five from its arm. Once we've landed on Earth we can send
part of the group on land to gather us some supplies, while we 
detach and float the saucer into the correct alignment so that
we can reattach it perfectly. Replacing the arm will be a snap!
I'm sure that a resourceful man like yourself would have planned
for every contingency!" 

"Yes... I did construct several replacement support arms in the
off chance that one would be damaged. But, my question is 
whether or not we'll have enough lifting power to move a 400,000
metric ton saucer with just the three of us, strength enhancing
equipment or no." 

Again Washu has to take several deep breaths to keep her from
strangling Kyoto. "Never underestimate the greatest scientific
genius in the universe!" 

"That's what I'm afraid of...."

"Washu, you said you wanted to run another check up on me?" asks
Yoni. 

"That's right. You, Tenchi, and the other Kiyone, come with me 
down to my lab."

Once the four of them leave the bridge, Kyoto releases a heavy
sigh. "Oh, boy... I can see I've got another sleepless night
ahead of me." 

 

* * *

 

Meanwhile, in Washu's lab...

"I'm pregnant?!" Yoni has a wide, exuberant smile on her face.
She grabs the nearest person to her --Tenchi-- and gives him a 
bear hug. "Tenchi-yon, I'm pregnant!" 

In contrast, Kiyone-yoni, looks somewhat downcast. After a few
minutes of ecstatic hugging, Tenchi and Yoni notice this. 
"What's wrong, Kiyone-yoni?"

"I wanted to be pregnant, too!" She bursts into tears and buries
her face in Tenchi's shoulder. "I want to have another child,
Tenchi-yon." 

Tenchi wraps his free arm around his despondent wife. "It's 
okay, Kiyone-yoni, we'll find some way to get you pregnant
again."

Yoni wraps her free arm around the first Kiyone. "Of course
we will. I'll help, okay?" 

Kiyone-yoni sniffles and smiles. "Thank you, both of you." She
then looks mock-sternly at Yoni. "But it's no fair if you get 
pregnant again!" 

Washu judiciously keeps her mouth shut, then continues,
"There's more, Yoni. You're 5 months pregnant."

As if cued by Washu's words, Yoni's stomach slowly inflates
until at the average size of a 5-month-pregnant human woman. 

Yoni gasps then shrugs. "Well, that was fast." 

Kiyone-yoni's eyes about pop out of her head. "Tenchi-yon,
that's never happened to me."

Tenchi, for his part, is visiting the land of stars at this 
moment. 

 

* * *

 

"Mommy number two's pregnant?" Mirei's eyes are as wide as 
saucers. 

Yoni nods, smiling. "That's right, Rei-cha'ya, I'm pregnant."

"Oh.... is it a boy or a girl?" Mirei pats Yoni's stomach.
"Does it always get that big, that fast?" 

"Uh... not normally, Rei-cha'ya." 

Mirei looks a little... put off, though. "Oh..." 

"What's wrong, Rei-cha'ya?" asks Kiyone-yoni. 

"Well, I'm happy for Mommy number two, and I want to have a 
little brother or sister, but I'd gotten used to being the 
baby." 

Kiyone-yoni hugs Mirei. "I tell you what, Rei-cha'ya, you can 
still be my baby, okay?" 

"Okay! Thank you, Mommy!" Mirei hugs Kiyone-yoni. 

"I still want to know how she got so far along, so fast," 
comments Ayeka.

"Amen to that," agrees Ryoko.

 

Yoni raises an eyebrow as Tenchi brings in a small box. "What's
in the box, Tenchi-yon?"

"It's all the pregnancy books we bought while you--sorry,
I mean Kiyone-yoni--were--sorry, I mean was--pregnant
with Tsunami," explains Tenchi. 

Yoni smiles and shakes her head. "That's very sweet of you, 
Tenchi-yon, but I still remember the stuff in the books." She is
about to lean in and give him a series of suffocating kisses
when her face suddenly takes on a strange expression. 

Tenchi looks at her concernedly. "You okay, Yoni?" 

Yoni suddenly starts breathing raggedly. "Tenchi-yon,"
she says, slowly, "My water broke." 

"Your.... water... broke?" Tenchi sits still for a few moments,
then shoots off the bed and out the door screaming "Yoni's
in labor! Yoni's in labor!" 

He runs back in a moment later carrying a pot of hot water and
blankets. Kiyone-yoni is hot on his tail, carrying more blankets
and an old hospital gown for Yoni to wear, and the Washus bring
up the rear carrying medical equipment. 

Tenchi is bustling around, trying to be of help wherever he can,
until finally Kiyone-yoni pushes him out of the room. "We can 
handle it ourselves, Tenchi-yon." 

"But--" he starts.

Muriyaki smiles at him as she carries more stuff into the 
bedroom. "Don't worry, Tenchi. I've been pregnant lots of times,
and we'll take good care of her."

Feeling rather useless, Tenchi walks down to the living room and
drops onto the couch. As he does this, Mirei rushes into the 
house and towards the stairs. She skids to a stop as she sees
her father sitting on the couch all alone. "Are you okay, 
Daddy?" 

Tenchi smiles wanly. "Sure, sweetie, go on up and help your 
mothers."

"Uh, uh! I'm gonna stay down here with you, you look sad!" Mirei
seats herself on the couch beside her father and leans her head
on his shoulder. Tenchi hugs her. "Thanks, Rei-cha'ya." 

"I'm gonna be a grandpa!" Nobuyuki exults as he comes into the
living room carrying a bottle of saké. "Tenchi, what's wrong?
You should be happy!" 

"I am, Dad, it's just that I feel that I should be up there,
but the girls just pushed me out of the room." 

"Don't take it so hard, Tenchi. I wasn't allowed to be in the 
room when your mother was giving birth to you." 

Tenchi smiles slightly. "Thanks, dad. I think." 

"Don't worry about it, son!" says Nobuyuki consolingly,
pouring his son a cup of saké. "Have a drink! It'll make you 
feel better!" 

Mirei tsks gently as she watches her father take a gulp of the
rice liquor. "Don't get drunk, Daddy. My old mommy and daddy
said people shouldn't drink except on special occasions."

"Would you like some saké, Mirei?" asks Nobuyuki, offering
her a cup. 

"Okay..." Mirei gingerly accepts the saucer and takes a dainty
sip. Her face scrunches up a second later as she swallows.
"That's bitter!" 

"It's an acquired taste." 


* * *

 

"Now push!" 

Gritting her teeth, Yoni pushes again. This labor has been the
only thing about her pregnancy that has not went by incredibly
fast. 

Kiyone-yoni mops her brow with a cool, damp washcloth. "Just
a little more, sweetie, just a little bit more. I've been 
through this before, and I know."

Yoni nods and keeps pushing, and pushing, until... 

The cry of a newborn baby echoes through the house. 

Throughout the room, there are sighs of joy and relief. The 
umbilical is cut, and new born is wrapped in soft blankets
and handed to her mother. The real Washu is grinning from ear to
ear. "Congratulations, Yoni, it's a girl!" 

Yoni hugs her newborn daughter gently, "Oh.... she's beautiful."
She smiles up at Kiyone-yoni. "It's your turn next, 
Kiyone-yoni." 

Kiyone-yoni smiles. "I'm counting on it." She giggles. "Maybe
the next one will be a son!"

Yoni smiles weakly and leans her head back into the pillow.
"I'm sleepy. Could you watch-- what are we going to name her?" 

"How about Achika?" suggests Kiyone-yoni. 

Yoni considers it. "That's a good idea, but it doesn't feel 
quite right for this one. I think... Tokimi. Yes, Tokimi." 

The first Kiyone nods. "Yes. She even looks like the goddess." 

The door to the room slides open, and Tenchi sheepishly
sticks his head in. "Can I come in now?" 

The first Kiyone nods and beckons him to join her sitting next
to Yoni on the bed. "Come on in, Tenchi-yon, say hi to your 
newest daughter." 

"What's her name?" asks Tenchi as he sits down. 

"Tokimi. Tokimi Masaki." 

"That's beautiful." Tenchi smiles and coos at the baby as he 
takes her in his arms. "Hi there, little one, I'm your daddy,
and these are your mommies, and we're going to take good care
of you." 

Mirei comes into the room and cries out in delight as she sees
her newest sibling. "Oh! I have another sister now!" She sits
down on the bed next to her father and says hello to Tokimi. 

 

* * *

 

Artificial sunlight filters through the bedroom window, 
awakening Tenchi. He leans over to the Kiyone on his left and 
kisses her on the cheek. "Morning, Kiyone-yoni." 

"Morning, Tenchi-yon," she says coyly. 

He leans over to the Kiyone on his right. "Morning, Yoni." 

"Morning, Tenchi-yon," she says playfully. 

He then looks up to find a beautiful, curvaceous, 
mahogany-brown-haired girl lying naked on top of him. "Morning--
who are you?" 

She stirs atop him, moving her body up and down on his. When she
opens her eyes and sees him, a glow forms behind her purple
eyes. "Morning, daddy." 

"What the hell!" Tenchi tries to extricate himself from this 
girl, but she has wrapped herself around him and is nuzzling
his neck. 

"How's my daddy, today?" the strange girl asks. 

"Who are you?" asks Tenchi, finally pushing the girl off of him
and settling into a cross-legged seated position. 

The mysterious girl has a slight pout from being pushed off of 
Tenchi, which only adds to her appeal. "Why'd you push me away,
daddy?" 

"Why do you keep calling me daddy?" 

The girl looks at him and smiles. "I'm your daughter Tokimi,
daddy!" 

"You're what?!" 

The two Kiyones choose that moment to awaken. The first thing
they see is a naked girl sitting on their bed, talking to their
husband. Kiyone-yoni turns to Tenchi and asks, "Tenchi-yon,
what's going on?" 

"Yeah," agrees Yoni. "And who is this girl?" 

The girl grins at the two Kiyones and hugs the nearest one. "Hi,
mommies!"

The two Kiyones look dumbfounded. 

Tokimi then turns her gaze back to her father. "Can we have sex,
daddy?" 

The two Kiyones faint, and Tenchi screams, "Washu, get up here!"

 

 

THE END

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Footnotes:

*Technically, when Tenchi and Kiyone became the emperor and 
empress, they adopted both Sasami and Ayeka. Ayeka normally
refers to them as Tenchi and Kiyone, except when feeling 
mischievous or when trying to get something out of them. 
(Normally, Tenchi will cave into Ayeka as soon as he hears her
call him father. On the one occasion she has called him daddy,
Tenchi had thrown his wallet at her and hid under his desk for
eight hours.)

**And so will we.