NOTE: All characters original to the Tenchi-Muyo! TV1 series portrayed in this story, as well as all those from the Tenchi-Muyo! Ryo-Ohki OVA series, are the sole property of AIC and Pioneer Animation. Any appearance of them in actual life is purely coincidental. Tenchi-Muyo! material and paraphernalia listed within is copyright Pioneer Animation 1997. Kyoto Minamoto, Muriyaki Kushiragi, Chisako, Chi-Ohki, and all other related characters are the sole property of R&C Books and appear through permission from R&C Books. If you would like to use any of these characters in your work, please contact the licensing department at RCBooks@hotmail.com or visit our website at www.geocities.com/Tokyo/Bay/1375. Send all C&C to muriyaki@hotmail.com (for storyline and fight scenes) and/or keiichi_dono@hotmail.com (for intercharacter relationships and continuity). Thanks for reading! Episode #17: No Need for a Mirror Image! "This is our objective." Digital Washu has most of the group gathered in the living room of the Minamoto house. For the past week, the members of the Masaki and Minamoto families, as well as the extended family of friends, have been slowly coming to grips with the drastic shift in their lives. Particularly affected are those who have lost family or loved ones in the past few days. Kiyone is relying heavily on Tenchi and their daughters for support; Muriyaki has been wandering Chisako, visiting all the places where her daughters had once lived and played; Ayeka is slowly draining the ship's supply of pharmaceuticals; and Ryoko and Kyoto's normally blissful relationship has suddenly become quite strained. Digital Washu gestures at the holo-projector on the coffee table, and an image of Earth appears. "I have traced the point of time's dissolution back to one specific timeframe: the moment when Tomoko made its emergency fold. All we need to do is travel back in space-time to that exact moment, and destroy Tomoko. If Tomoko never folds, the evil Kyoto never finds it, or finds out about Akiko. None of this will have happened." "So, you mean to tell us that once we destroy Tomoko, we'll all disappear?" demands Kyo. "Not at all. Time will merely reset itself, and all of you will find yourselves in the exact same places you were when everything started going wrong." "No! No! I don't wanna go back to Sargasso!" Mirei suddenly cries out. Kiyone draws Mirei into her embrace. "Don't worry, Rei-cha'ya, if this works, as soon as we get back, we'll come and get you, alright?" "Promise?" sniffles Mirei. "Promise," answers Tenchi, hugging both Kiyone and Mirei. Sasami and Tsunami move into the embrace to comfort her sister. The real Washu pulls up her holo-laptop and types into it. "I'll put in a reminder to us to go and pick her up after we do this." "So, what are we waiting for?" asks Kyoto. The fact that he and Ryoko are standing far apart is not lost on the gathered assembly. "Well, I think we're all waiting for you and Ryoko to settle whatever this is that is bothering you two." "What has been bothering you, anyway?" inquires Kiyone. "You wanna tell them, or do I need to?" says Ryoko to Kyoto, adopting a rather acerbic tone. "If you think you know everything about it, dear, then why don't you?" he shoots back. "I'll say it." This comes from Momoko. "It has to do with the other Kiyone-- the one that Daddy was married to a long time ago. After the memorial service, Kyo was demanding to know why our parents never told us about their pasts. Kyo also demanded to know what our father would have done about Mommy if the other Kiyone hadn't died." There is a sharp, collective intake of breath. "Ryoko, Kyoto, there is really no need to dwell on this. You two love each other, and you're together now. What's the point of thinking on what might have been?" Murasaki's words surprise everyone; they had almost forgotten that the goddesses were there. The feuding couple exchanges glances, and then, ever so slowly, draws close to each other, Ryoko slipping easily into her place in Kyoto's arms. She is crying softly as she whispers something in Kyoto's ear; he is crying himself, and merely nods. "And in answer to your original question, I had planned the operation to take place in two days. I suggest we all rest up." As the various groups break off to eat and rest, Kyoto continues hugging Ryoko. "I'm sorry, sweetie, I'm sorry..." "It's not your fault," she tells him. "It's just that the past week has been so crazy. I almost lost you and our kids, our lives have been thrown into turmoil yet again, and I-I-I.... I don't even know what's happened to Nagi." "Shhh..... shhh.... Nagi's a big girl, I'm sure she can take care of herself. She's your sister, after all." "I guess you're right," agrees Ryoko. * * * The clock in the room switches from 3:26 am to 3:27 am, making a faint clicking noise. There's no Earthly reason why one would hear this sound, faint as it is; yet it is enough to awaken Sasami. She had been in the middle of a rather erotic dream concerning certain persons who will remain nameless when a warm sensation on her left hand had roused her from slumber. "Mmmmh.... what is this?" she had murmured as she had turned her back of her hand into her line of sight. A tingle of fear runs down her spine as she sees the image on the back of her hand. It is a circle with a triangle inside. The inner ring of the circle touches all three points on the triangle. It glows an ominous blue-white, and looks almost as if it had been branded on the back of her hand. Her first thought is to run to her parents and show it to them and ask where it came from, but that thought is wiped away as she feels a new urge building in its place. As if in a dream, she feels herself rising from her bedroll and sliding her feet into slippers. Her eyes flick over to Tsunami, who is doing likewise. Only Mirei is still asleep. The two elder princesses are drawn out of the house, their conscious minds being slowly but steadily submerged. Their feet only stop walking when they are standing in front of the three goddesses once again arrayed in full ceremonial garb. The spirits of the dead are once more present, but this time Misaki and Achika hold folded robes in their arms. The two princesses shuck off their nightclothes and don the robes held out for them. As Misaki and Achika dress them, Funaho and Ryoji begin to apply makeup. When the effort is completed, Sasami and Tsunami have their hair tied back in twin ponytails falling down their backs and have streaks of gray-black paint across their cheeks. Their Juraian forehead markings are glowing a blinding white. Sasami and Tsunami are both surrounded by spouts of blue-white flame that somehow does not burn them up. In front of each princess appear a ceremonial drum and a pair of sticks. They begin to pound the drums rhythmically as the spirits of the dead begin to dance, in the same fashion they had danced several nights before. The three goddesses begin to chant again, using the same words in ancient tongues several nights before. The pounding of the drums slowly reaches it peak, and then it crescendos. At that very moment, the accumulated energies blowtorch upward, obscuring everyone in a pale azure brilliance. When the light fades, Sasami and Tsunami are once again asleep in their bedrolls. And the clock once again reads 3:27 am. * * * "I don't wanna watch my daughters taking a bath, Kiyone-yoni!" Tenchi is trying to pry his wrist out of his wife's grip, to no avail. Normally, he has no objections to taking a bath with his wife. However, their situation is anything but normal. "I know you don't, Tenchi-yon, and neither do I, but you know they've been acting really weird lately," she reminds him. "I know, I know..." he sighs. "What happened to our girls? For three days they've eaten nothing but an apple slice a day, they spend practically all their time at the shrine, they don't play or talk with Mirei or Momoko or the Ohkis anymore... Heck, they barely look the same anymore! It's like something's drained the life out of them." He feels Kiyone's grip relax and he starts to struggle free again. "But I still don't see why we have to watch them in the bath!" "Why, daddy?" she teases. "Are you afraid that you're going to be naughty with them?" "Kiyone-yoni!" She sighs and grabs his wrist again. "Now, come on. We need to see if they're getting thin or something, and there's only one way we can do that." "It would look a lot more natural if it was just you!" he insists. "When have I not taken a bath with you?" Kiyone says in a lilting tone. "Yeah, but with them in there too?!" "We have a couple of times," she reminds him. "Now, you're helping me with this and that's final." Tenchi finally gives up. "Yes, dear." (If he had seen this, Kyoto would have called Tenchi "whipped".... except for the fact that he does the same every time Ryoko asks him to do something.) Being the first to reach the bathroom door, Kiyone slides it open and walks into the spacious alternate-dimension bathroom. Sitting on the far side, both wrapped in towels, are Sasami and Tsunami. They had been talking in a hushed tone when their mother entered and that talking abruptly ceases when they catch sight of her. In a tone completely leeched of emotion or inflection, they chorus, "Hello, mother." Kiyone feels a small twinge of sadness at hearing her daughters address her so formally-- she is more like her mother than she likes to think-- but she is more worried about what is happening to them. Even with the events of the past week, Sasami and Tsunami have always been cheerful and affectionate. To see them like this is almost more than Kiyone's already-strained heart can bear. Are you getting any reading off them, Kiyone-yoni? Tenchi asks via their mental link. While his control of the mental link is better, Kiyone has a better sense of what their offspring are thinking. Nothing, Tenchi-yon, it's like listening to static. Kiyone-yoni, are you implying that our daughters are airheads? Tenchi receives a nasty glare from Kiyone, which is followed by her own mental response. That's not funny, and it isn't nice to Mihoshi either. Tenchi smiles as he hears Kiyone's gentle laugh in his head. Seriously, though, you're not getting anything? Nothing, Tenchi. I'm worried; do you think they have some kind of disease? No way to tell, unless we can get them down to Washu. Get in the bath; see if you can talk them into it. All right, Tenchi-yon, I'm getting in the bath now. Kiyone removes her bath kimono-- after closing the door, of course-- and slips into the bath. She smiles at her daughters as she gets herself settled. "So... everything alright with you two?" Sasami and Tsunami look up at their mother and then return to looking down. "Oh.... okay...." Tenchi-yon, watch us, 'kay? Oh, no! I'm not watching our daughters take a bath! Why not, 'fraid you'll wanna come in and be naughty with them? Of course not! Ohhh.... fine, I'll watch in the doorway. Happy now? Yes, daddy, Kiyone sends back, giggling mentally. Tenchi is peeking through the crack in the doorway, feeling more and more perverted as the moments pass. He's been crouched here for the last ten minutes, and not a damned thing has happened. He's about to send a message to Kiyone when he hears a familiar voice behind him cry out, "Oh my god! Tenchi, what are you doing?!" Before Tenchi can do anything, Nobuyuki has heaved him to his feet and is trying to drag him away from the door much in the same fashion that Tenchi used to do to him. "Tenchi, what are you doing?!" "Dad, let go of me!" Tenchi yells, trying to struggle free. "I'm doing this for a reason!" "I don't care what your twisted sexual fantasies are, I'm not going to let you watch your daughters bathe!" "Dad, Kiyone's in there too!" Nobuyuki almost drops his son. "Ah-ha! You want to have sex with both Kiyone and your daughters! This is even worse than I suspected!" "No, I don't!" screams Tenchi, kicking and flailing. "Our daughters have been acting weird lately and we're trying to find out what--" CRASH! Tenchi's kicking and flailing has just smashed in the bathroom door. Kiyone blinks and starts scrambling for a towel. Sasami and Tsunami growl at their father a second before both of them fire off a Juraian energy blast. The balls of blue-white slam into Tenchi and send him crashing back into the wall. Kiyone screams, and after having wrapped a towel around her wet, naked body, rushes to her husband's side. "Tenchi, Tenchi, Tenchi! You're hurt!" She kneels next to him and places his head in her lap. "Poor baby... are you alright?" Nobuyuki, when not swatting at the flames on his back, is staring goggle-eyed at his son and daughter-in-law. Several hours pass before Washu finally let's Tenchi out of Chisako's medical center. She had been lecturing him about how fire and sex don't go together when he had promptly swept Kiyone up in his arms and carried her out the door. As they had left the medical center, they'd heard her muttering about "my stepson's uncontrollable sex drive.... and his wife's twice as bad...." * * * That evening, Tenchi and Kiyone pay a visit to the Minamoto house, which is almost deserted, the kids being elsewhere on-ship and the other tenants doing likewise. "So what brings you two by?" asks Ryoko as she sets out drinks and motions her and Kyoto's guests to the couch. Tenchi exchanges a look with his wife and meets Kyoto's eyes. "Kyoto, we need to ask a favor of you." "Shoot." "Well...." Tenchi exhales shakily. "Can you change yourself into Kiyone's form?" "Sure!" Kyoto rises from the couch and blinks. His form vanishes and is replaced by a perfect replica of Kiyone, right down to the jeans and Shinonome High sweatshirt the real Mrs. Masaki is wearing at the moment. In a perfect copy of Kiyone's voice, he asks, "Why, daddy? Do you want two of your little girls to be naughty with?" Ryoko moans and buries her face in her hands, as does the real Kiyone. Tenchi shakes his head violently and glares at Kyoto. "Not funny, Kyoto. We want you to go and spy on our daughters." Kyoto almost falls face first to the floor. "Sure, but why would I need to change into Kiyone? I could just change myself into Ryo-ohki or something." "Because we need you to spy on them.... while they're in the bath." This time, Kyoto does hit the floor. When he recovers, he sputters, "You want me to what?!" "I would go in myself, Kyoto, but the last time they nearly killed Tenchi. I was thinking, with you being almost indestructible, you could go in and.... watch them safely." "You do wonders for my ego, Kiyone-yoni," mutters Tenchi. Kiyone smiles and squeezes her husband's hand. "Don't worry, I'll make it up to you later." "I'm sure you will," mutters Kyoto under his breath. "And, this goes my better judgment, but I'll do it." He holds up a finger. "Just one night, though." Tenchi immediately starts bowing in thanks. After about ten minutes of bowing, Kiyone pulls him to his feet and leads him to the door. "Thank you, Kyoto. Just tomorrow night. Now, I'm taking my husband home." Ryoko moans and waves a little wave to them as they rush out the door. "No self-control." "Just think if you'd married him!" quips Kyoto. "What's your point? Are you saying that you don't satisfy me sexually?" Kyoto moans and quietly excuses himself to their room with a chilled bottle of vodka. * * * "Mommy? Daddy?" Tenchi slowly opens one eye to see Mirei crouching down to eye-level with him. "Huh? Rei-cha'ya, whatcha doin' up this late?" Mirei looks tired. "Tsunami and Sasami kicked me out of our room. Can I sleep with you guys tonight?" Tenchi gently extricates himself from Kiyone's grip and pulls Mirei into the bed. "Sure, sweetie." He shifts around so that she's between him and Kiyone. "Thanks, daddy," whispers Mirei, leaning up and kissing Tenchi on the cheek. She snuggles between her parents, feeling safe as both Tenchi and Kiyone wrap their arms around her. She falls asleep almost instantly. * * * The next evening, Kiyone and Kyoto are in Kiyone and Tenchi's room. Kiyone is giving Kyoto her standard bath gear-- all the way down to the undergarments. Kyoto distastefully holds up a frilly pair of pink satin bikini panties. "And you wear these on a regular basis?" Kiyone nods, her face reddening slightly. "All the time." "That must make Tenchi happy." "Well, yes it--but I'm not going into that!" Kyoto quirks a smile and folds the garments up in his towel. "How long do you usually take?" "When I'm with Tenchi, a couple of hours. When I'm with the girls, usually a half-hour. Please, try not to ogle my daughters too much." Still blushing, she adds, "And please return those panties intact." Kyoto nods, reddening a little himself-- or, right now, herself. S/he leaves the room, and Tenchi comes back in, burying his face in his hands. "Oh my god, Kiyone, what have we condemned this man to?!" "He'll be fine," shrugs Kiyone. "Now, didn't I need to make something up to you?" "Uh, yeah, but you already did that last night, Kiyone-yoni." "Well, I'm going to make it up to you again." She leads him out of the room and down to the kitchen. * * * Kyoto is grumbling to him/herself as s/he enters the bathroom. As expected, Tsunami and Sasami are sitting in the far end of the bath. They barely glance up at him as s/he shucks off the robe and climbs into the bath. The next ten minutes are passed in utter silence. Tenchi and Kiyone are right, this is really weird! What's going on with them? I know, I'll try to strike up a conversation or something. Get them talking. Smiling at them, s/he says, "You two having menstrual cramps?" It's only then that s/he realizes what s/he's said. Unfortunately for him, the two princesses have already processed what s/he said. Their heads snap up, their eyes blazing with fury, and Tsunami rises to her feet, heedless of the fact that both she and her sister are unclothed. Screaming in some unknown tongue, she holds her right arm high above her head, and a bluish ball of crystalline energy appears in it. She slams the ball down into the water. The water immediately goes from turquoise to a violent hue of indigo, and the area where Kyoto is sitting immediately becomes the nexus of a giant whirlpool. S/he is unceremoniously yanked down by the raging torrents of water-- literally sucked down the drain. * * * In the dining room, Tenchi and Kiyone are enjoying a quiet, candle-lit dinner. Tenchi is about to toast to their marriage, when Kyoto falls out of thin air onto the table. Kiyone screams. "Our dinner!" It takes Tenchi a few moments to process that the naked Kiyone on the table is not the Kiyone he is married to. Once that's done, he turns his gaze away. "Someone help me get this candle out of my ass!" screams Kyoto. It takes them the better part of a half-hour to get him cleaned up and dressed. They find themselves dining on leftovers that night. * * * Ryoko looks up from the novel she's reading to see her husband, in his usual form but looking very ravaged, stagger into the house. "What the hell happened to you?!" "I learned a valuable lesson today: never ask a possessed princess if she's having menstrual cramps." Ryoko's jaw burrows through the floor on its way to China. "What in the hell possessed you to say that?!" "I don't know," admits Kyoto. "All I know is that I asked the question, and next thing I know, I'm falling on Tenchi and Kiyone's romantic dinner and I get a candle stuck up my ass!" Ryoko's jaw has surfaced in China and shaken hands with Deng Xiaoping. When it has returned to Chisako, it starts waggling open and shut in laughter. "Serves you right for asking that kind of question!" Kyoto glares at his wife. "Shut up! I got a candle stuck up my ass!" "If you were in Kiyone's form, I bet you liked getting a candle stuck up your ass!" "Ryoko, if you don't shut up right now..." "Bet you'd like Tenchi to stick his candle up your ass, wouldn't you?" Kyoto grabs his wife by the shoulders, and forces his lips against hers. It is ten minutes before the two of them separate again. In a husky voice, Kyoto asks, "Are you so sure you'd want Tenchi to stick his candle up my ass?" "I'd prefer you to stick your candle some place else." "It's already lit and dripping wax." "Don't you just love euphemisms?" she sighs as he carries her up the stairs to their bedroom. * * * Several mornings later, most of the group is gathered back on the command deck, once more in combat gear. Kyoto is running the ship's systems through checklist after checklist, making sure that all of the ship's systems are at peak operating capacity. Digital Washu has just finished checking over the fold drive and reports it fully functional, although the primary rotation drives have taken a lot of stress and will eventually need replacing. Tenchi sweeps the group with his gaze once, then meets Kyoto's eyes. "Take us in." "With pleasure." Kyoto initiates the pre-programmed course and the space station shudders and folds. Only to find itself face to face with Tomoko. "What the hell?!" screams Ryoko. "Digital Washu, I thought we were supposed to go back in time to before this happened!" "We were!" answers Digital Washu hotly. "The other Washu must have anticipated this!" "Argue about it later!" snaps Tenchi. "We've got to fight back!" "Already on it!" acknowledges Kyoto. His fingers are already adroitly manipulating the controls, and Chisako's hull begins to disappear as gun batteries--point-defense lasers and railguns, charged-plasma guns for antiship work, and heavy particle-pulse cannons for long-range hitting power--emerge from their resting places. Space immediately becomes alive with streamers of blue, green, and white light. Tomoko smoothly sails out of the way. You see, the three stations are identical in design, but not necessarily in size. Chisako is the largest, and Tomoko is the smallest, with Akiko fitting somewhere in between. Being the smallest naturally affords Tomoko a much higher maximum speed than her sisters. In addition, her fold drive is somewhat more advanced than Chisako's, and can perform point-to-point folds within a single dimension at a fraction of the time that Chisako needs. So it is that Tomoko warps from it's retreating standpoint and opens up with her weaponry. Its smaller size, however, puts Tomoko at a distinct disadvantage where firepower is concerned. In most cases--that it, in combat against smaller opponents--that disadvantage is still far better than the opponent's advantages; anything smaller than a Chiyoda-class command carrier/superdreadnought would die immediately. When up against big sister Chisako (or Chisako-neechan ^_^), however.... Tomoko's shields, not nearly as strong as Chisako's, crumble under the pounding from Chisako's guns. Once the shields collapse, the hull itself starts to weaken under the onslaught. Finally, a concentrated particle barrage shatters one of the connection struts that connect one of the five saucers to the hub. "Passage tube five is gone," reports Tenchi from one of the tactical stations. "Secondaries shifting to compensate." "Good," replies Kyoto. "Open a commo channel and offer terms for a surr--" "Shit!" interrupts Ryoko, who is manning the other tactical station. "Tomoko's shifting course--she's gonna ram us!" "Initiating evasive maneuvers," reports Kyoto. "Concentrate particle fire on the hull breaches, if we can." "Too late!" reports Washu. "They're already bringing some of their shields back up!" "Well, concentrate on the unshielded parts!" Chisako's heavy guns belch azure death at their adversary. The already weakened support cannot stand under the onslaught, and the saucer tears free from its hub, spinning off uncontrollably on its own vector. Kyoto starts to wipe the sweat from his brow when a sobbing Mihoshi suddenly grabs him. "I'm scared!!" "Ack! Mihoshi!!" Kyoto tries to pry the blond detective off of himself, but in the process of doing so accidentally nudges Chisako's steering controls. His hands slam across the keypad in awkward positions, initiating unplanned maneuvers. And Chisako gets flung directly in the path of the prodigal saucer. Everyone aboard Chisako feels the impact of the rogue saucer slamming into Chisako's shields. The impact carries so much kinetic energy with it that the area of the shields to take the impact-- the quadrant shielding the number five saucer-- collapse. The impact badly jars the number five saucer, bending the support arm like a pipe cleaner and pressing the number five saucer flush with the central hub. The rogue saucer is not faring quite as well. It had caromed off Chisako, like a cue ball ricocheting off of its target, and is now spiraling downward through the Earth's atmosphere. "Um, where exactly is that thing gonna hit?" inquires Kiyone. Washu is already checking its trajectory. "Okinawa," she answers in a cold, analytical tone. Kyoto straightens up, a worried expression on his face. "Oh my god, we have friends down there." He turns to Tenchi. "Hold the fort. I'm going down there." * * * Kyoto rematerializes once the island of Okinawa with energy broadsword in hand. At least, it used to be the island of Okinawa. Now, what was a idyllic island of quiet fishermen and their families is now a raging inferno. Ravaged homes and scorched bodies are strewn everywhere. In the distance, the wail of air-raid sirens can be heard. The rumble of large bomber engines can be heard overhead, though no one can see them through the black-red smoke curling up from the ground. Kyoto feels like he's standing in the middle of an abnormally realistic war-holo. The sight of the dismembered bodies and rotting flesh would make any normal man sick to the core. Kyoto thanks whatever powers there may be for his ability to survive without air. It takes him five minutes to find the home of this universe's Tenchi and his family. When he steps through the door, he sees that he is far too late. A fallen timber had impaled Tenchi. His wife Mihoshi is almost dismembered beyond recognition. Tenchi's younger sister, Sasami, has her entrails spilling forth from her body; she had committed seppuku*. The rest of the family is dead from being crushed by a falling stone wall. Shaken by this latest loss, Kyoto wanders out of the house. He is about to Chisako for a beam-up when he hears shouting behind him. He spins around to find himself face-to-face with a small group of American soldiers. He grins; he could use someone to vent his frustration on. His eyes flashing red with fury, he lunges forward at the troops. He then proceeds to dispatch them in as many ways as he can think of. He's just about to unleash an energy whiplash at the two or three survivors when he hears a high-pitched whistling sound. His eyes widen as he sees the saucer looming down at him at several times the speed of sound. He barely has the time to say, "Crap" before it hits him. * * * Everyone on Chisako's command deck winces as they see the mushroom could caused from the saucer's impact reach up through the atmosphere, nearly touching them. "What the hell happened to Kyoto?!" yells Ryoko. As if in answer to her question, a pile of debris suddenly appears on the bridge. Everyone looks at it in alarm. The pile of debris starts to shake, then falls away as a figure crawls out of it. Everyone is shocked at what they see, but Tenchi is the first to find his voice. "Kiyone?!" The figure looks down at his body--or, rather, her body--then back up at the group of friends and family gathered around. Said figure then does what anyone in his--no, that's her--shoes would do. S/he screams and faints. Several hours later (bless the person who came up with the time-lapse idea ^_^).... "So this happens every time you get really banged up?" Tenchi is doing his best to stay calm. Kyoto nods. "Yep. The last time this happened was about five hundred years ago. I had Chisako jacked up to do some mod work.... and she fell on me." "And how long are you stuck like this?" Kiyone is not very happy about having someone stuck in her form. "Generally.... about a week." "A week, huh?" Ryoko looks even less happy than Kiyone. "Well.... you can just stay in the Masaki house for a week!" On that note, she storms out of the Masaki house's living room. Murasaki and Muriyaki follow her. Kyoto's mother turns at the doorway. "We'll try to calm her, but it'll probably be a couple of days. You'd better just stay here for now." She leaves the house, closing the door behind her. "Well...." With great reluctance, Tenchi rises from the couch. "We'll set you up in the guest room." He smiles dryly. "It's the least we can do." Kyoto smiles. "Thanks." * * * * * * "Come on, Tenchi-yon!" Kiyone is literally dragging her husband out of their room. "You can't hide in here forever!" Tenchi has a determined set to his features. "I'm sorry, Kiyone-yoni, but I just don't feel comfortable down there with Kyoto in his--her--current form." "Relax, my husband. Kyoto won't try to jump you." Tenchi looks his beloved in the eye. "Promise?" Kiyone flutters her eyebrows at him. "Please, Tenchi-yon? For me?" Tenchi moans, a sure sign that his wife has won the argument. "All right. For you." She kisses him. "Thank you.... Daddy." He groans as she leads him down the stairs to the living room, where the rest of the house's occupants are having breakfast (nine different varieties of fruit). Mirei, having proven herself as adept in the kitchen as Sasami, smiles broadly at her parents. "Morning, Mommy, Daddy!" "Morning, Rei-cha'ya," says Kiyone as she seats herself next to Tenchi, as he sits between her and Mirei. "This arrangement looks great." "Yeah," agrees Tenchi. He leans down and kisses his youngest daughter on the forehead. "Thank you, Rei-cha'ya." Mirei giggles and snuggles closer to her father. "Good morning, everyone!" A perfect duplicate of Kiyone's voice wafts down the stairs.... in an eerie echo of her typical tone after a night of passionate lovemaking (i.e., just about every night). The figure that is Kiyone Masaki's clone follows right behind, dressed in a short nightshirt--short enough to show off the skimpy panties underneath. A wide grin is on.... this person's.... face, one that brightens exponentially as the eyes lock onto Tenchi. "Good morning, Tenchi-yon!" Tenchi gulps several times before finally croaking, "Kiyon--I mean, Kyoto?" The actual Kiyone is somewhat more direct. "Kyoto! What the hell are you doing?!" "Just saying good morning to my husband," says Kyoto sweetly, causing everyone within hearing to facefault--just starting with Tenchi and Kiyone. Several hours later, Kyoto has returned to a semblance of normal (although not before Tenchi had returned to his and Kiyone's room, to hide once more). And Kyoto explains his behavior at the breakfast table. "It's called emulation. When I'm stuck in a form for an extended period of time, I start to take on that form's characteristics.... that is, emotional characteristics." Kiyone gulps. "Oh no." Kyoto nods. "Exactly. I think Tenchi has the right idea by hiding in you two's room. Before the self-repair process has run its course, I will be you, Kiyone, in mind as well as in body, and when I see Tenchi, I'll react the same way you do." * * * * * And he's--no, she's--not kidding. For the rest of the week, Kyoto's usual personality is almost completely submerged and replaced with Kiyone's--but with Kyoto's own libido. Aside from a few memorable events which Sasami will probably never stop teasing them about (and more than a few that she would never stop teasing them about if she were aware of their existence), Kiyone and Tenchi are really not that "naughty" outside the bedroom; just affectionate. (That is, arms around each other or hand-in-hand, or even Kiyone in Tenchi's lap.) Kyoto, on the other hand, literally pounces on Tenchi every time he ventures forth from his and Kiyone's room. Add to this the fact that the "two" Kiyones are virtually indistinguishable--Kyoto's entrapment has even duplicated Tenchi and Kiyone's mental link--and one has the ingredients for a very nasty Molotov cocktail. Still, most of the time Tenchi can somehow distinguish between the two. The sole exception is one morning when he and his Kiyone-yoni were getting frisky in the bath, only for him to discover one very important difference: this Kiyone was still a virgin. Upon.... uncovering.... this fact, he immediately bolted. The real Kiyone was not mad--in fact, she was more amused by it than anything else--but she teases him about it mercilessly for several days (except for the times when his mouth is keeping hers from talking). Tenchi spends most of his time hiding in his and Kiyone's room. The only ones he allows in are the real Kiyone and Mirei. When not comforting her father, Mirei is standing guard outside his room with the guardians, wielding her father's bokken and doing her best to look menacing. (After the entire ship has patted her on the head and said how adorable she was being, she decided to just sit down and sulk). Somehow, she can also tell the two Kiyones apart. Ryoko, upon learning of her husband's behavior--albeit uncontrollable--she is ready to beat the stuffing out of him. It is only Muriyaki and Murasaki's intervention that keeps her from carrying out her angry wish. Finally, Ryoko has calmed down enough to listen to the explanation. Momoko and Kyo aren't sure what to think, although Kyo has made more than one remark about how good their dad looks as a girl (only to have Momoko yell "Onii-chan no hentai**!" and try to beat him up). Finally the week has passed. Washu has force-fed Kyoto some antiaphrodesiacs, and for once the emulation is not in charge. "I'm ready to do this," s/he declares. "What's the first thing you do?" asks Washu. "Well, I have to start by undressing....".... and Kyoto shucks off the robe. Tenchi abruptly spins on his heel. "Tenchi, this isn't gonna be that arousing." "I'm not taking any chances." "Just as well; this may get kind of nasty." And without warning, Kyoto's form drops to the floor, as the man-trapped-in-the-body-of-a-woman begins to twist and convulse in pain. As s/he curls into a fetal position, whimpering, the skin on his/her back suddenly bursts open, in a remarkable approximation of the birth of the extraterrestrial in Alien. There is a sudden burst of greenish-white mucus that spatters out of the fissure in the body. The body begins to slowly deflate, like a balloon that someone is slowly letting the air out of it--or, in this case, all the vital organs. From this husk, climbs another nude figure, this one decidedly masculine. He is coated in the mucus that had burst from the other body, but he is grinning widely. In a very Kyoto-ish voice, he says, "I'm home!" Ryoko steps up to him, and drives her fist into his stomach. Before he can recover completely, she pulls his face down to hers and gives him a long, suffocating kiss. "You and I are going to have a very long talk, mister," she lectures him as she drags him back to their house. "Well, I guess that's that," declares Washu. She starts to head for her lab, and the rest of the group starts to disperse, when a white light suddenly surrounds the expired husk on the floor. In its place appears an opaque column, exactly Kiyone's height. It flashes, and then, standing naked in the middle of the Masaki house living room.... .... is another Kiyone? "Tenchi-yon!" she squeals happily, and she pounces on Tenchi. Kiyone is at her husband's aid in an instant, trying to pry the other Kiyone off of him. "Please let go of my husband!" "No! He's my husband!" "No, he's mine!" "No, mine!" "Mine!" "Mine!" By now Tenchi's eyes have glazed over. THE END Footnotes: *Seppuku: Literally translated as "belly-cutting", also known as hara-kiri. In Japan, an honorable form of suicide. **Onii-chan no hentai: "Big brother's a sicko!" or "Big brother's a pervert!"