ruyeyama@ranma.com (Richard Uyeyama) H'lo, all! After this post should follow three song parodies that I've written in the past couple years. Here are a few quick notes about each of them: "The Loser" - Special thanks to John Kilpatrick, who originally came up with the pair of lines that inspired this song... "Egg-san Song" - This is actually more irc #anime! than it is AMS... In fact, the only real AMS reference is the title reference to "Tamago-san", from AMS3 (or AMS soundtrack, vol.2, track 20, "Tamago no Uta")... "Back in My Day" - There isn't much, really, that I can say about this. Just read it. THE LOSER - Parody of "Back to Paradise" (Gundam 0083, lyrics by Linda Hennrick) New lyrics, 8/94, by Richard Uyeyama V1.0 "The Loser" All alone, here in outer space... Got my 'struction manual right beside me. Tryin' to figure out how to turn and face... that enemy I see far behind me. I don't want... I don't wanna be laughed at by all my friends. I don't want... want to lose again... Got a dream that I win a fight... Got a dream that I get much stronger. Gotta hold onto these dreams of might... When will they come true? How much longer? I don't know... Why does space seem to me where I belong? I don't know... Was I born to be a pilot...? * I gotta fly like a duck... (fly like a duck!) I gotta run like a wounded badger... Barely finished basic training, got a long way to go... I'm gonna reach for the stars... I'm gonna fall on my face just tryin'... Barely lived through that last fight, running all the way back home... * (instrumental interlude) Here's a battle I could have won... if the proper things I had spoken... and the proper things I had done... and the proper things I had not broken..... I'm so sad... all my enemies fall from laughter, not pain. I'm so sad... Here I go again... to battle... I gotta fly like a duck... (fly like a duck!) I gotta run like a wounded badger... Barely finished basic training, got a long way to go... You never know what luck is till it's gone away... You never know what skill is 'less it's far away... far away! * 2x Repeat (instrumental fade...) EGG-SAN SONG - Parody of "Achy Breaky Song" (Al Yankovic), a parody of "Achy Breaky Heart" (Don Von Tress) New lyrics, 3/94, by Richard Uyeyama V1.0 "Egg-san Song" You can torture me... with PC-ko's sushi... You can slap me all around the room... Or you can *zot* me dead... and dance upon my head... Then sweep me in a closet with a broom... Put candles in a cake, and whack me with a rake... and set fire to my hair, oh any day... But please there's just one thing... and I'll do anything... I'll even get down on my knees and pray! Don't sing that song... don't sing that "Egg-san" song... Sing anything else you can find! But if you sing that song... that stupid "Egg-san" song... it might just make me lose my mind! (aaaaah!) (instrumental interlude) Now you can blow my brain... with something as insane... as Xaemyl quoting folk songs from the South... Or keep me up 'til dawn... and when I finally yawn... pop a dirty sock into my mouth... Or you can spray some mace... directly in my face... or poke me in the side until I'm sore... Or have Saeba use me... as target practice free... I don't think I can take it anymore! Don't sing that song... don't sing that "Egg-san" song... I think it's driving me insane... Cuz if you sing that song... that mixed up "Egg-san" song... I might lose track of where my brain... (aaaaah!) (instrumental interlude) Don't sing that song... don't sing that "Egg-san" song... You know it really annoys me... Cuz if you sing that song... that irritating song... I might go on a killing spree... Don't sing that song... don't sing that "Egg-san" song... Sing anything else you can find! But if you sing that song... that stupid "Egg-san" song... it might just make me lose my mind! (aaaaah!) (instrumental end) BACK IN MY DAY - Parody of "When I Was Your Age" (Al Yankovic) New lyrics, 3/95, by Richard Uyeyama V1.2 "Back in My Day" Listen up, you otaku... let me set you straight. You newbie anime fans don't got it rough. Always have everything handed to you on a silver tape. And some say less than gold's not good enough! Well, nobody ever gave *me* subtitles when we were watchin' an anime show. We made our own lines up... when we just didn't know. There wasn't no anime for just a dollar an' ninety-nine cents... at the local Blockbuster... available for rent! Oh, back in my day... Oh, back in my day... Oh, back in my day... Oh, back in my day... Let me tell you something, you whiny little snots. There's something wrong with all you fans today. You just don't appreciate all the things you've got. We had crummy, unsubbed, mono tapes, and we liked it fine that way! Oh, there were seventy-three of us crowded in a sweaty room. It was so damn stuffy... and you wouldn't believe the "fumes"! Watchin' 10th gen. Macross on a black an' white TV... though we couldn't make out a thing... on that 6" screen! Oh, back in my day! Oh, back in my day! Oh, back in my day! Oh, back in my day! Didn't have no Mikado, didn't have no Nikaku! Man, we had to swim to Japan, just to find out what was new! Didn't have no AnimEigo when I was just a lad. The real USMC was the closest thing we had. Didn't have no Kinokuniya, there were no manga about. Didn't have no Yaohan... just had to do without. Didn't have no Pocky sticks, had to chew on sticks of wood. Didn't have no Streamline... well, I guess that's somethin' good! (instrumental interlude) What's the matter now, sonny, why the hell ya watchin' *this* junk?! What, don't people have standards anymore? Cuz "good enough" is *not* good enough when it sucks this bad, you punk! Even listenin'... just to these voices is a chore! We used to walk five hundred miles just to go see somethin' new. There were no conventions... man, you better believe it's true! Even untranslated anime... blew away cartoons with ease... And without understanding... we'd still watch in Japanese! Oh, back in my day... Oh, back in my day... Oh, back in my day... Oh, back in my day... (repeat and fade...)