aj153@FreeNet.Carleton.CA (David Watson)


PAST THE RETURN DATE
A manga/anime fan fiction by Dave Watson

DISCLAIMERS:
     Story and "The Lessons of Friends" are copyright 1997-1998 David L.
Watson.  Making money off this stuff without giving me any consultation,
credit or royalties will be subject to murder, mutilation or a ravenous
pack of lawyers.
     Based on the story and characters in the manga series Video Girl Ai,
copyright 1990-1992 Masakazu Katsura, published by Jump Comics.
     This fic is set after the end of Ai's story in tankouban Vol. 13, so
there are lots of spoilers, and if you haven't read the tankouban, I
heartily recommend you do, or at least read the translations on Warren
Fernandez's VGAi site (at the time of writing; look around the pages at
www.anipike.com if this one goes down) to give you a good enough idea of
what has happened (note:  the individual chapter links with fancy CGI are
broken, but the ones that enable you to download the whole volume still
work).  The big scene near the end is lemon, but my point of focus is the
emotions and thoughts of the characters, not luridly narrating the
mechanics.  Any semi-literate idiot who's read Penthouse Forum can write a
sex scene, but trying to write a distinctive one with some class (100%
Anglo-Saxon-language-free) while trying to keep the pretention level down
is not as easy as you might think it is.  I think I did it well; I hope you
do, too.  Constructive criticism is welcomed at aj153@freenet.carleton.ca.
Flames will be used to heat my room.

Without any further ado,

VIDEO GIRL AI:  PAST THE RETURN DATE

     It was hard for Youta to believe that it had already been one year
since Ai had magically reappeared in his life, and stayed there ever since.
It had been an amazing year.  Their first picture book, _Kokoro-kun's Job_,
had gotten many positive reviews and sold very well.  There was pressure
from the publishers to write a sequel, but Youta stood his ground and gave
them a proposal for a new book with new characters.  They were so pleased
with it that they gave him a good cash advance, but the publishing date was
about as close as the first one was, and sometimes they had to pull
all-nighters and drink coffee until their legs went stiff to try to meet
it.  It amazed them both how exhausting work that required very little
physical effort could be.  Ai suggested that they turn in early last night.
Youta thought it was a bit strange, considering that she was usually the
one pressing him to work harder, but his eyes were slamming shut, so he
wasn't about to argue.  They didn't even have time to say "good night" to
each other before they collapsed beside each other on the couch in the den,
fast asleep.

     Youta awoke first the next morning.  His schedule had gotten so busy
that he was now keeping a planner.  He thought it would also be a good idea
to help him keep track of important dates, such as friends' birthdays.
Lately he'd felt that one of these dates was approaching, but the drive to
finish the new book had always popped up and put it out of his mind.  He
took the planner off of his dresser on his way to the toilet, and after he
sat down he opened it to today's page.  There was nothing there but a
scribble in red ink.  He looked a little closer, rubbed his eye a bit and
read it.

     "The day Ai-chan came back to me!"

     Youta's eyes snapped open after the words sunk in.  How could he
forget this day?  Goddamn those publishers for working him into the ground
like that!  He didn't even have the time to shop around for a present for
her.  Now he was going to have to scramble to plan a date worthy of this
day.  As he was wracking his brain trying to think of a restaurant she
liked and a last-minute gift, there was a knock on the door.

     "Hey!  Hey, Youta, are you writing the book in there?  Other people
have to use this room, too, you know."

     "Ah--just a minute, Ai-chan."  Youta finished his business, washed and
dried his hands, and walked out.  Ai was standing there holding a hand
towel, dressed in the same T-shirt and jeans she had been wearing
yesterday, with a couple of stains where she had spilled paint on them.
She usually shone and bounced with energy early in the morning, but the
work had obviously been getting to her as well.  However, as soon as she
saw him emerge with an anxious look on his face, the familiar mischievous
glint came to her eyes.

     "Good morning.  What were you doing, taking so long in there?  Did
sleeping beside me get to you?  Spend some quality time with yourself?"

     "What?  I wasn't doing anything like that!  Anyways, it's free now."

     Ai-chan wrinkled her nose and said, "I think maybe I'd better wait a
couple more minutes."  Then she straightened her face back out, smiled at
Youta and stuck out her tongue at him.  Youta started to frown, but smiled
instead.  She always teased him like that.  It was one of the ways she
showed her affection for him.  She was now careful to not let it get out of
hand, since the last thing she wanted to do was make him mad and defeat her
reason for doing it.  He knew this as well, and loved her all the more for
it.

     As she walked into the toilet, Youta told her, "I'm going to go put
the coffee on and hit the shower."  He couldn't remember the last time he
had a nice, long, relaxing bath.  The constant drawing and painting of
pictures for the book took up most of his and Ai's waking hours, and
eating, washing and even sleeping were now things that had to be done
quickly.  After he stepped out of the shower and dried himself off, he felt
more refreshed.  When he bought the shower massage head a month ago, he was
doubtful about what the package claimed it did, but at times like these he
felt like it really did wash the stress off along with the dirt.  While he
was getting dressed, he heard Ai walk into the bathroom, turn on the shower
and sing to herself.  'Take her out...Where to?  The Great Maze I took her
to for her 17th birthday? No, no.  She was really happy at the end of that,
but she was kind of freaked out about getting lost in it all the time.
That bowling alley we went to on our first date?  No way, we fought like
hell there.  Don't want to remind her of that.  Wait a minute.  Magokoro
for dinner.  Yeah, that's it.  Perfect.  But where else?  What do I get her
for a gift?  A new dress?  No, she gets clothes all the time.  Something
special.  But what?'  He sat there and continued to think for a long time
about what he could get her to celebrate this day, but he still couldn't
decide.

     "Youta?  Breakfast will be ready soon."

     'Ah, breakfast.  Might be just the thing I need now.'  Youta briefly
remembered the first meal Ai made for him on the day she flew out of his TV
screen into his life.  For food that looked so good, god, it was awful.  It
was the first time he'd thrown up at the table since he had the flu when he
was five.  That was a long time ago, though, and now everything she cooked,
even simple dishes, was like a feast.

     Youta walked into the kitchen and took a coffee cup from the cupboard.
He looked over and saw Ai frying up some French toast.  She was dressed in
sweat pants and an old T-shirt; the sort of things she wore when they were
going to spend time working on the new book.  Even in lumpy formless
clothes like these, she always looked so cute.  He thought to himself, 'Now
how do I tell her that we're not going to do the book today?  It's an
important day, and she needs the break, too, but she wants it done more
than I do.  She even teased me about being lazy the last couple of times I
suggested time off.  Hmmm...'

     Ai turned to look at him and exclaimed, "Hey!"

     "What?"  Then he looked down.  "Shit!"

     He'd forgotten about the coffee he was pouring, and it was spilling
all over the counter.  He put the pot down and rushed for the dishcloth to
mop it up with.

     "You've been acting weird all morning, Youta.  What's wrong?"

     "Nothing, nothing.  Ah, that smells good."

     "Well, sit down in the dining room and I'll get it to you in a
minute."

     Youta sat down, and thought some more about how to tell Ai about
today, wondering if he'd have any trouble convincing her to make a day out
of it and, if he succeeded, what to buy her.  He was still mulling it over
when he was startled by the clanking of a plate, knife and fork being set
down in front of him.

     "Gah!  Ah, thank you, Ai.  Itadakimasu!"

     He poured some syrup over the toast and dug into it.  Delicious.  As
he ate, he continued rolling gift ideas over in his mind.  'The new dress
is a pass.  A ring?  No, no.  She never wears jewellery.  Ahh, I don't
know.  I want to get her something to show how important today is, but she
doesn't go for really fancy things...'  His brow furrowed, and he took
another bite.

     Ai saw the expression on his face, and she asked, "Is something wrong
with the food, Youta?"

     "Huh?  No, nothing at all.  It's terrific, as always."

     "Then what's on your mind?  You looked like you were chewing gravel."

     Youta decided to stop thinking about how to put a fancy spin on what
he wanted to tell her and just come out with it.  They knew each other long
enough to not have to do things like that.  "Well...do you know what today
is?"

     "The same as usual.  Draw, paint, draw, paint some more, and stop to
pick up more art supplies."

     "No, it isn't.  We won't do that today."

     "Are you crazy?  We've got a deadline!"

     "Yes, I am crazy.  About you.  On this day last year, Gokuraku
returned you to me for the last time."

     Ai's eyes opened wider as she slowly put down her fork.  "Really?"

     "Really.  It was the happiest day of my life.  How could I let it go
by?"

     "Wow.  Has it really been a year already?"  She thought back to that
day.  Her spirit had been floating around Gokuraku's world, unable to see,
hear or talk to the people she had befriended on Earth--Youta, Moemi,
Takashi and Nobuko.  All she could do was say over and over that she loved
them all and hoped that they would be happy.  She had no way of knowing if
they could hear her, and it filled her with pain.  She then prayed to
Gokuraku to please let her see them again, because she still had so much to
say to all of them, especially Youta.  Dear, sweet Youta.  The one who
helped her believe in love and showed her the power it held.  Suddenly she
felt every particle of her being swirling in a vacuum and her mind clouding
over with TV snow and roaring static.  She thought that her tape had ended,
taking her life with it.  The noise faded slowly to silent black, and then
familiar shapes rose from the murk.  A round porthole window, a rectangular
drafting table, a human head with a softly spiked hairstyle, teary eyes and
a mouth open in deliriously happy shock--she was back in Youta's den, right
in front of him!  It was as if the universe had finally admitted it was
wrong to them, and gave them the greatest apology.  Already a year since...
wow..."You know, we haven't gone on a date in a long time, have we?"

     "Exactly," said Youta.  "Forget about the book for today.  It's your
day, and I want to enjoy it with you as long as it lasts."

     "And I want to enjoy it with you, too.  Come on, let's finish this so
we can get out of here.  It's beautiful outside."

     They ate as fast as they could, dumped the plates in the sink, washed
their hands and faces and went to their rooms to dress for the day.  Youta
tried to remember what he was wearing on this day last year as he rifled
through his dresser and closet.  He found the jacket that he was wearing
around the time that Ai first appeared to him, and tried it on.  It still
fit and looked good, so he tossed it on the bed.  That should do the job.
He then chose a neat button-down shirt and suitable pants to go with it.
As he dressed, he remembered back when he used to devour manuals on how to
be with a girl, and chuckled.  He picked up the jacket and walked out into
the hallway.

     "Are you ready yet, Ai?"

     "Just a minute," she sang from her room.

     Knowing how long that minute could last sometimes, Youta turned back
to his room to read a manga while he waited.  As he reached for the
doorknob, he heard her door open.

     "Hey, you, don't change your mind on me now!"

     He turned back to see Ai wearing the French dress he'd bought her for
taking care of him during her first stay in his home.  Even though she was
kind of worn out from the work, she was more vibrant than she'd been in a
long time, making her beauty even brighter.  Her smile bode well for the
day's events.

     "So, Youta, what's on the agenda for today?"

     "I think that we should walk down to the park and then go where the
wind blows us from there."

     "What?  Didn't I teach you about how to plan a date with a girl to
make it look like a surprise?"

     "Yeah, you did, but we've been using plans for about a month now with
this book.  When I hear the words 'plan,' 'schedule,' or 'agenda,' I reach
for a cup of coffee.  I need a break from that, and you probably do, too.
Besides, why make it look like a surprise when you can have as many real
ones as you want?  And you know that if there's any place you want to go,
just say the word.  Your wish is my command."

     "You're expecting me to surprise you?"

     "Well, yeah, sort of.  You surprise me, I'll surprise you, maybe we'll
surprise ourselves somehow."

     Ai thought about this for a moment.  A couple of places came to mind,
as well as a couple of things to do.  She excused herself and went back to
her room, emerging again a few seconds later.

     "You might just have something there, Youta.  Shall we go?"

-----

     Ai was right.  It was beautiful today, and the sunshine and warmth of
Spring gave their spirits an extra boost.  It was also the season of the
cherry blossom, and as they neared the park, the trees greeted their eyes
with seas of delicate pink.

     Finally, they reached the park, sat down on a bench and looked around.
People milled around the fountain, looking up towards the sun, letting it
recharge them.  Sparrows swooped through the sky.  The spray from the
fountain's statue made rhythmic ripples in the water in its base.

     "Okay, Youta, it's still pretty early.  What do you have in mind?"

     "Let's take a walk down that passenger mall over there and look around
a few places."  A good idea, since he still couldn't think of anything to
buy her.

     Ai led them into a toy store first, where they looked at all the
awesome displays and played with some of the children trying out the toys.
Youta was glad that she decided to come here first, because he didn't get
to hang around children very often, and it made him happy as a kid himself,
especially when he saw Ai smiling and giggling as she played.  They had
almost forgotten how beautiful the sound of a child's laughter was, and
their morale was now higher than it had been all month.  On the way out of
the store, they saw a book rack, and among the books was a copy of _Kokoro-
kun's Job_.  Youta was tempted to autograph it, but thought better of it.
After that, he suggested the clothing stores close by.  'Ah, hell.' he
thought, 'what's wrong with another piece of clothing anyways?  If she
wants it, it's hers.'  They spent some time in each store, but Ai didn't
pick out anything she wanted.  He saw a shirt he liked in the second shop
and took it to the counter.  She wanted to buy it for him, but he said no
and took out his wallet.  "I couldn't let you do that.  You do more than
enough for me."

     "But I'd like to do something for you today."

     "Okay, then, how about coming with me for something to drink?  I'm
getting pretty thirsty."

     "Sounds good to me."

     "I know just the place, too."

     There was a teahouse just a few doors down.  They sat at the counter
and ordered colas.

     "Say, Youta, we should come to the toy store more often.  Being around
those kids was great.  And don't you think it'd help with the new book as
well?"

     He nearly blurted out, "To hell with the book," but she was right.
The joy he felt from seeing the kids playing in the store was something he
had to remember when they picked up again tomorrow.  After all, the book
was for them.  They chatted about some of the toys they'd seen and the kids
they played with as they drank.  Youta dropped some money on the counter
for the drinks and said, "Okay, Ai-chan, it's your call now.  Where to
next, my princess?"

     Ai giggled, "Oh, go on with you.  I saw an arcade on the other side of
the street.  Up for some games?"

     "Lead the way."

     They walked into the arcade, got some change and lost themselves in
the world of running and jumping sprites, popping balloons, jousting
knights and exploding spaceships.  Ai felt at home here, like she was using
the joysticks and buttons to communicate with old friends.  They walked by
an old Doukyuusei mah jongg game and Youta looked at it and chuckled.  Ai
glared at him.

     "Come on, who needs that game when you've got me?"

     "Does this mean I can cover your body with stacks of tiles sometime
and pluck them off in pairs?"

     She laughed, called him kinky and gave his back a playful shove.  Then
she spotted a UFO Catcher, ran up to it and dropped in a 100 yen coin.  He
watched her concentrate on positioning the hook just so, and it picked up a
doll that looked like Son Goku from Dragonball, and dropped it in the slot.
She took the doll out and presented it to him.

     "For you, for today.  Don't you think it kind of looks like you?"

     "What, with the monkey tail and all?  Ha ha ha!  Thank you, Ai-chan."

     They left the arcade and headed towards the park again.  "Now how
about lunch somewhere?  Feed me and I'll be your friend for life," said Ai.

     "Is that all I need to do?  If I'd known, I would have fed you much
sooner!  Where to?"

     "How about over there?"  She pointed at a ramen stand.

     "I could take you somewhere a little classier if you'd like.  I've got
the money for it."

     "Yeah, but I haven't had a good bowl of ramen in ages.  Let's go for
it."

     "Okay, you're the boss."

     As they sat at the stand and ate, they listened to a busker with a
Canadian flag sticker on his acoustic guitar playing and singing.  They
were especially struck by how he sang Radiohead and Violent Femmes songs,
and he even took a good crack at L'arc-en-ciel's "Blurry Eyes," despite his
flawed Japanese.  After they finished their ramen, they stood in the small
group watching him and dropped a 500 yen coin in his guitar case, which
prompted him to say, "Airy gateau, go say mass."

     Walking through the market mall again.  Ai saw a flower stand and ran
up to it, fawning over the bouquets.  "I don't know which is more
beautiful, roses or carnations."

     Youta didn't have to have that hint hammered into him.  He asked the
woman at the stand for one bouquet of each.  Ai looked at him with
surprise, since normally he'd discuss which one of two things to buy with
her.  He just shrugged and grinned.  "There's no law saying you can't have
both, is there?"

     "True, true.  Youta, there's one more place I want to go to.  We have
to catch a couple of buses to get there, and it takes a long time."

     "Where's that?"

     "Well...it's a surprise," she said, with less enthusiasm than she had
earlier.  Youta was baffled.  They had been having fun, and Ai was leading
him someplace else, but it seemed like she didn't really want to go there.
They walked to the bus stop and waited a few minutes in silence.  A bus
pulled up, and Ai perked up a bit.

     "That's ours.  Come on."

     They took a seat and things got quiet again.  Youta looked at Ai just
sitting there, staring forward kind of blankly, cradling the flowers he'd
bought her.  He wondered if it might be something he said or did, and put
his arm around her shoulder.  She moved a little closer to him, but still
didn't say anything or look at him.  'Ah well,' thought Youta, 'I'll find
out what's happening when we get there.'

     "Okay, we have to transfer at this stop coming up."

     They got off the bus and waited.  Ai was now looking kind of sad, and
this worried him.  "You know, if it's that hard on you, we don't really
have to go there."

     "Yeah, but I want to, and I really want you to come with me.  Ah,
here's the next bus."

     They boarded and sat down, and Youta pulled her close again.  She said
nothing for a long time, and this made him wonder even more what was in
store.

     Ai soon broke the long silence with, "Here's our stop."

     They got out to find themselves in front of a cemetery.

     Youta was really confused now.  "Why did you take us to a graveyard?"

     "I promised a friend that I'd come here with you."

     "Huh?"

     "Just come with me and you'll see."

     They walked along the path until she stopped in front of a small stone
marker.  It was Natsumi's grave.  He started to feel guilty because he had
never really tried to find out where she was buried.  Ai put the bouquet of
carnations down in front of the gravestone, lit a stick of incense, placed
it in the slot in front of the stone, crouched down and started to pray.
When she finished, he got down and prayed as well.

     When Youta got back up, he turned to Ai.  "Thanks for letting me know
about this.  I was finally able to pay my proper respects to her.  I wonder
why you led us here on our date, though."

     "Well, one of the last times I went to see her at the hospital, she
asked me to listen to her last will.  One of the things she said was, 'Be
good to Youta.  Make as many nice memories as you can.'  I wanted to show
her that I was following her wishes, and prove it by bringing you here with
me."

     "Well, I don't know if we really did make them today or not.  I mean,
we didn't really go anywhere besides the park and the mall--"

     "Well, here, too."

     "...and here, and I didn't spend much cash on things for you."

     Ai walked up to him and put her arms around his shoulders.  "So?  You
remembered what today was, for one thing.  I'd forgotten it myself.  Also,
we spent a really nice day together doing things we wanted to do, and I had
a lot of fun.  That's what love is about.  Not about money or fancy things.
Money can never buy what we have."  She then gave him a big hug to make the
message sink in deeper.

     Youta hugged her back.  After letting go, all he could think to ask
was, "If you knew where Natsumi was buried, why didn't you tell me sooner?"

     "Because you probably would have come here every week or something to
cry over her, and she would have gotten up out of her grave and beat the
crap out of you for taking time with her you could have been spending with
me, making those memories."

     "Hmm.  Yeah, she would do something like that, wouldn't she?"  It
still wasn't very much of a comfort to him, and he quietly looked down as
they walked back towards the bus stop.  Ai saw how he was taking this and
stopped in front of him, cupped his face with her hands and lifted it to
meet hers.

     "I'm sorry if this made you upset, Youta.  I didn't want you to be
that way.  Just think about how pleased Natsumi is that we're together.
That's the way she wanted it to be.  And me, too.  You've made two girls
very, very happy.  Cheer up."

     Between the warm hands on his cheeks and the warm words in his ears,
he couldn't help but smile.  "Thank you, Ai-chan."  He then remembered
something.  "Oh, by the time we get back downtown, it'll be about time for
dinner, won't it?  How about a steak at Magokoro?"

     "I'd love it."

-----

     The steak was excellent, as always, and Ai and Youta chatted happily
about the things they did today.  Ai stopped a funny anecdote she was
telling about Natsumi for his sake, but he assured her it was all right,
and told her one of his own after it.  After all those days of working on
the book until they dropped, this day was something they not only wanted,
but needed greatly, and they were both totally rejuvenated.

     When they reached their front door, Youta looked in the mailbox.
There were a couple of letters, a takeout restaurant flyer and a small
padded parcel there.  He looked at the parcel and didn't see a name in the
return address, but saw that it was from Okayama.  Could it be from...?

     After they got inside, Ai saw the package in his hand.  "Who's that
from?"

     "It doesn't say.  Guess there's only one way to find out."  He opened
the parcel, and saw two copies of a CD inside, with a letter.  He unfolded
the letter and read out loud:

"Youta:

I hope this letter finds you and Ai in good health.  I was happy to hear
that she came back to you and that the two of you are now doing well making
picture books together.  I bought a copy of _Kokoro-kun's Job_ myself,
because I knew it'd be something I'd want to give to my kid (if I ever have
one).  I've read it a couple of times myself, and I like it so much that my
kid would have to fight me for it!

Remember how I told you that I formed a jazz group with Kouji (who told me
to say hello) here in Okayama?  It's called Band of the New Past, and we
were signed up after someone from Sony's A&R department caught one of our
shows.  We've just received the first copies of our first album, _Memory
Wharf_, and I've enclosed two of them.  Could you please give one of them
to Moemi for me?  I've forgotten her address and phone number, and I really
want her to have one.  We'll be going on the road soon after it's
officially released, and when we come to Tokyo, I'll call you so we can all
see each other again, and of course I'll get you into the show.

Let me know what you think of the CD, especially Track 4.  If you like it,
please tell all your friends to buy a copy.  We've got to earn back the
record company advance, after all!  Take care of yourselves.

Sincerely,
Takashi."

     Ai was giggling at the last part.  "Some things about him haven't
changed, have they?  Still, it's great to see he's doing something he loves
to do.  Come on, let's go listen to it."

     They went to Youta's room, and turned on the stereo system.  She
ripped the wrapper off of the CD, took out the booklet and gave him the
disc.  He popped it into the player, punched up Track 4 and sat on the bed
next to her so he could read the liner notes.  The song was called, "The
Lessons of Friends," and in the booklet it read, "To Youta and Ai, two
people who have taught me more about the human heart than anyone else has.
I wish you both eternal happiness.  And to Moemi--I'm sorry.--Takashi."

     The introduction was slow, cool and quiet, but had a heavy air to it,
like something was trapped inside.  After the buildup, the singer came in:

I was an island out of everyone's sight
I saw the world go by in my distant view
I stayed here in my shell
In a comfortable hell
Staying close to the devil I knew

I dug my heels in 'til my feet couldn't move
The past controlled me for far too long
I had an iron will
Or so I thought, until
An open man taught me the meaning of "strong"

So now I listen to the lessons of friends
Open my eyes so they can see me through
I listen every day
to what life has to say
Because I'll have to teach these lessons, too

Just by trying to protect myself
I'd hurt good people in so many ways
Once I'd always hide
behind the sin of pride
Now I'll atone for the rest of my days

If I could only take all of this back
and recall all the pain, well, I would
but it's too late now
So I've let my guard down
Knowing the bad has helped me take in the good

Now I listen to the lessons of friends
Open my eyes so they can see me through
I listen every day
to what life has to say
Because I'll have to teach those lessons, too

     A saxophone solo surfaced and ran among the drums, bass and piano,
nervously looking for a place in the song to settle into.  Youta and Ai
listened closely as it sang in clenched, steely tones, strained in frustra-
tion, laid back a couple of times to catch its breath, burst into flurries
of high notes and cried mournful lows.  A woman's voice joined in with a
soft, childlike scatting, brightening the mood of the song, especially when
the sax and then the other instruments rose to meet it and dance with it.
The woman's voice sounded familiar to Youta.  He looked in the booklet and
saw it credited to Megumi Hayashibara.  'Funny,' he thought.  'It sounds so
much like Ai-chan's voice that it's scary.'  As soon as everything crested
and ebbed, the lead singer stepped back in.  The arrangement and tempo of
the song stayed the same, but the mood was calmer than before:

This was my first step, take it from me:
You can't get anything if you're not forgiving
Keep an open mind
You'll be paid back in kind
'Cause if you stop learning, you'll stop living

So you should listen to the lessons of friends
Open your eyes so they can see you through
Keep listening every day
Life has a lot to say
For some day--
you'll have to teach those lessons, too

     Hayashibara-san's wordless singing appeared again to ride smoothly
atop the now-serene melody, and glide it into a close.  As the song ended,
Youta and Ai found themselves in each others' arms.  The date, the visit to
Natsumi's grave and this message from an old friend of theirs who hadn't
seen them in over a year had reminded them of why they were together.  It
wasn't the picture book work.  It wasn't for the sake of Natsumi's memory.
It was their very souls, connected with links strengthened by the hardships
they both endured on the way to truly finding themselves.  All the work
they were doing had distracted them from the greatest force in their lives,
and they had begun to take it for granted.  They looked in each other's
eyes, and they were both starting to shed a tear.  Youta slowly brought his
face closer to Ai's, and their lips pressed together in a long, slow, deep
kiss.  They had kissed before, but this time it felt more important than
any other.

     As they eased down further onto the bed, they embraced each other
tighter, out of love and partly out of fear.  They remembered the period
when every time they had almost reached a point of deeper intimacy, the
forces of Gokuraku had always pulled her away to either try to separate
them or to play with their lives like a cruel child pulling a fly's wings
off.  It was only about four or five months ago that they were able to kiss
on the lips without any hesitation, and now they were both thinking about
taking a radically bigger step.  Would they be pressing their luck?  In the
time since Ai returned to Youta, her creator, the Man in the Coat hadn't
shown his face anywhere.  She hadn't felt any fever or dizziness, except
for the time Youta took her on that wild ride at the amusement park after
she insisted.  Her legs were wobbly after she got out, and she started to
panic because she thought Gokuraku was trying to recall her again, but she
felt better after sitting down with Youta for a few minutes.  The Man in
the Coat had left them both with many emotional scars that were not going
to heal that easily.

     "Youta?"

     "Yes?"

     "Uh...could you please let me up for a minute?"

     Arms slowly slid down from backs, and Ai stood up, made a sad-eyed
smile at Youta and started unbuttoning the back of her dress.  Youta gulped
and stammered, "D-do you really think we should do this?"

     "Youta, I'm kind of scared myself.  But I know that I love you more
than anybody or anything in the world.  I always have, and I always will.
I want to give all of myself to you.  If anything is going to happen to me,
then I want it to happen while I'm close to you.  If I'm going to
disappear, I want to disappear with you knowing that I love you this much.
I'd rather have it end like that then to keep being afraid that something
bad will happen."  As she said this, she let her dress fall to the floor,
stood before him in just her panties, and started to cry.  "If it's going
to happen, then let it.  Just don't let me disappear alone!"

     Youta stood up and held her close, feeling her shoulders trembling.
What she said made him sad, too, but the warmth of her body inspired him.
"Please don't talk like that, Ai-chan.  You won't disappear.  I won't let
you disappear.  We've come too far in our lives to just throw it away like
that.  If anybody is going to take you away now, they'd better take me,
too, or else they'll have to deal with me coming to take you back, no
matter what I have to do.  I looked for you before, and I'll gladly do it
again if I need to."

     He gently wiped the tears from her eyes, kissed her deeply once more,
started unbuttoning his shirt and reached for the lamp so he could shut off
the rest of the world.  They took off clothes like reptiles shedding skin;
slowly, carefully exposing themselves to elements they might not be ready
to face, leaving new skin vulnerable to god knows what.  Their fingertips,
their arms, their lips and their tongues read each other's desperate
Braille in the darkness.  Every nerve ending in their bodies was more alive
than they had ever been in their lives.  Everything they had ever gone
through together had led them here, and they were determined to make it
last as long as possible--forever, if they could.  Both of them had
imagined what it would be like to make love, and so far it was everything
they'd thought it would be--and more.  They had no way of knowing that the
"more" would include being so afraid.  Not afraid of how this would affect
their relationship; their friendship and respect had roots so deep that
they had nowhere left to go but here.  Not afraid of whether they were
doing something right or wrong, or how their bodies measured up to the
people they'd see all the time in magazines and on TV.  They knew each
other well enough to let their instincts guide them and to listen to each
other, and were smart enough to not care about the latter.  This was the
first time they had done anything like this, but in the back of their
minds, they were worried that it would be their last time.  That this one
good and right moment would never be seen again.  They had to make the most
of it.

     Youta stopped and reached for the nightstand.  Ai heard him open the
drawer, fumble with a small cardboard box and then a plastic wrapper.  Now
she knew that this was something he'd wanted to do for a long time, but he
had either been too shy, too stupid or too scared to make the first move
himself.  She also felt a bit insulted about what she imagined he might
have been trying to say by going for a condom, but then remembered that it
was used for birth control as well.  He asked her softly, "Are you ready,
Ai?"

     She was surprised to hear him say her name without the "-chan".  It
was strange, but wonderful, to hear him say that he thought of her now as a
woman.  It seemed like a small gesture, but it was an affirmation to her.

     "Mm-hm.  Please be gentle."

     He carefully put it on and poised over Ai, facing the final barrier
between them.  She helped guide him into her, and he tried to be careful,
but when her hymen broke, she gasped out loud in pain, "Please, don't
move!"  She'd heard about how a girl's first time always hurt for a while,
but it was a shock to actually feel it herself.  She suddenly remembered
that pain was a part of love, and that she should know that better than
most people.  When the old man from Gokuraku showed her that Youta had been
looking for her for a week after she was first recalled, calling out to his
image on the TV screen and not being heard hurt.  Her memory coming back
after she was returned the first time hurt.  Being reassigned to help Youta
get together with Moemi-chan, but not being able to tell him her own
feelings for fear of being recalled was probably the worst time of her
life.  But now she was here with him, finally doing probably the most
important thing that two people in love could do.  Compared to those times,
this little bit of pain was almost comforting, because she knew Youta was
right there, with her, within her.  And besides, she had also heard that it
would only get better than this.

     Youta asked, "Are you okay?"

     Ai looked up at him and whispered, "Yeah, I'll be all right.  Come to
me.  I love you."

     "I love you too, Ai."  They kissed again with a new fervour, and then
began to move with each other.  They hugged even tighter and didn't let go,
and buried their faces in each other's shoulder.  Youta had read that when
you took this final step, you became a man.  While what he was doing did
feel indescribably good, he didn't feel manly at all.  He was more like a
frightened little boy, crying because his mother was leaving and he was
afraid she wouldn't come back, and he clung to Ai so hard that he became
almost oblivious to the sensations of his unity with her.  She clutched his
body to hers just as tightly, now regretting tempting fate with what she
had said earlier.  Their love had endured Gokuraku's meddling and Youta's
very close calls with Nobuko and Moemi.  She treasured it more than life
itself, and was now more determined than ever to stay with him.  By now
they were crying out each other's name over and over, as if to tell the
whole world (and Gokuraku) that they belonged this way, and to drown out
the non-believers.  Their faces pressed together cheek to cheek, and Ai
cinched her legs around Youta.  It was like they were trying to organize
the chaos above to the rhythm below.  They were almost wishing that they
would fuse together into one being that no one or nothing could tear apart.
The mutual pleasure had been building stronger all this time, and it
finally broke through their worries and concerns, and cleared their minds
with one sudden, blinding, screaming sweep.

     It was over.  The room stopped shaking.  The darkness lost its
forbidding air.  Youta and Ai lay there in each other's arms, panting and
drenched in sweat.  Their muscles ached from refusing to let each other go.
Youta clasped his hands around her waist and rolled to the side so that she
was on top of him.  She had to support his body weight this whole time, so,
to him, it seemed only fair.  After she kissed him again, she found the
strength to speak.

     "I've never felt anything like that before.  That was wonderful."

     Youta's head was still spinning a bit, and all he could say was,
"Mmmmm."

     "I don't know why we took so long to do this."

     Youta knew why.  It was because they were honestly scared.  Ai had
come back to him as a human girl, but they were worried that the Man in the
Coat still had a rein on her, and was waiting to pull her away with just
one tug.  They were afraid that every little step they would take to deepen
their relationship would bring it all down like a house of cards.  They
loved each other so much that they had grown to fear each other.  They had
both decided to face the truth tonight, damning the consequences, but still
hoping that they would never happen.  They had sex, but they had so much on
their minds at the time that it didn't really feel like they had actually
made love.  It was an act of defiance more than anything else.

     He finally said, "I don't know why, either, but I'm glad we finally
did."

     "So am I.  Thank you, Youta.  I couldn't have done this with anyone
but you."

     Ai rested her head on his chest, and her cheek smeared the cooling
sweat there.  She hadn't noticed it in the heat of passion, but was very
aware of it now.  "Eww.  Youta, I think you need a shower."

     Youta noticed that the small of her back was a bit clammy to his touch
as well.  "You probably can, too, Ai."  After a pause, a spark of daring
struck them, and they said at the same time, "Let's do it together!"

     After throwing the covers to the floor so they could dry out, Ai and
Youta went to the bathroom, staggering like light drunks.  As Ai turned the
light on, Youta dropped the condom into the wastebasket, and they settled
in under the shower massage head's warm spray.  Youta had seen Ai naked
before several times, but it was the first time he had no anxiety over it.
Ai had seen Youta naked, when she had bathed him the first night and he was
fighting to get away from her (giggle), but she had never seen him this
relaxed before.  They were now so comfortable that they were not only able
to wash each other's back, but everywhere else, too.  When she pretended to
put him in a wrestling hold and grabbed his crotch with the washcloth, he
just laughed.  As he gently wiped her breasts with the cloth, transfixed by
seeing the nipples harden, she took advantage of his distraction to soap
away the traces of blood from her deflowering.  She thought that seeing
that might be a bit too much for him.

     After they towelled each other dry, Youta said, "All right, let's get
back to bed before I pass out here."  After going to the toilet and walking
back to the bedroom, he flopped down on his back on the mattress and fell
asleep almost immediately.  This day, and especially this night, had left
him exhausted but happy.  Indeed, Ai swore she could see a smile on his
face.  She picked the covers up and pulled them over his body, and then
climbed in under them, snuggled her head against his shoulder and joined
him in the sleep of the just.

-----

     Morning.  Again.  Youta stirred, scratched himself, flipped the sheets
aside and struggled to get up and sit on the edge of the bed.  It was the
most turbulent night he'd ever spent, and he wanted to go back to sleep.
However, nature was nagging him and tugging at his wrist, so he picked his
underpants up off the floor, slid them on and plodded off to the toilet to
do god's work.  Relieved, but no less awake, he slunk back to bed and
settled in for some more winks.  He turned to the left, where Ai had been
sleeping, reached his arm out and mumbled, "Ai-chan..."  His hand felt
nothing but the firm mattress under the bedspread.  One eye opened and
focussed.  Ai wasn't there.

     Ai wasn't there!

     Youta snapped wide awake and started to panic.  'Where is she?  Oh,
NO!  Please don't let her be gone!  We've got a book to finish...more life
to live...more memories to make..'  He jumped up and raced out of the
bedroom, looked in the den..."Not here.  Dammit..."...looked into her room,
not caring if she yelled at him for barging in..."Not here either.
Shit!"...raced down the stairs, rounded the corner at the bottom a little
too soon and caught the end of the metal bannister, right in the pickled
plums..."YEOOWWW!"...ran through the dining room and tripped on a chair
leg, faceplanting into the floor..."Oww, jeez..."  He looked up into the
kitchen and Ai was standing there in the T-shirt and sweats she had on
yesterday morning and an apron, holding a spatula and staring in surprise
at him.

     "Youta?  Are you all right?  You look like you just saw a ghost!"

     "Thank god!"  He scrambled to his feet, ran to Ai and gripped her
around the shoulders.  "Thank god...I thought you'd been taken away from me
again.  You're still here."

     Ai glared at him with that malicious smile.  "Of course I'm still
here!  Do you think I'm going to leave a guy who's as hopeless at colouring
as you are to finish up our book?  Dummy!  Now go shower, put some clothes
on and I'll get breakfast ready.  We've got a lot of work to do and not
much time to do it in."

     "Uhh...yeah."  And good morning to you, too, reality.  Youta walked
carefully back to the bedroom, took off his shorts, put his bathrobe on and
saw his planner on the dresser.  He picked it up and opened it to today's
schedule.  All that was written there was, "Work hard on the book.  No
interruptions."  He cocked the pen, scratched out "No interruptions" and
wrote, "Work harder than that.  Order out anything Ai wants for lunch and
dinner.  Suggest wrapping up early (about 8).  Spend the night together,
this time for real."

     Last night, they had both wrestled with their anxieties, which tainted
an otherwise beautiful experience.  Now they knew for sure that they had
nothing to be afraid of anymore, and they were now free to make pure,
unhesitant love.  They had finally seen the truth, and were going to
confirm it with each other, every chance they had.

     That truth was:  They loved each other, more than anybody or anything
else.

     They always had.

     And they always would.

-----

     The Old Man was dubbing tapes in the back of Video Shop Neo-Gokuraku
when he suddenly smelled burning plastic.  He saw a wisp of smoke rising
from the bin of empty tape boxes, so he picked up the fire extinguisher and
started rummaging through the bin.  He found the box that Ai's Comfort tape
was kept in.  The plastic seam had melted, sealing it shut.  The old man
smiled knowingly, carefully cut away the clear plastic around the box and
put Ai's video label in a scrapbook.  No Video Girl had ever given him as
many problems as she had, but he considered them all highly honourable, and
now he knew that they had paid off for Ai and Youta.  Without the spectre
of the Man in the Coat looming over him, he hoped that he would continue to
uphold the fundamental principle of the original Gokuraku:  Bring lasting
happiness to the people who deserve it the most.

********
The End?
********

PAST-IT NOTES:

*  This fic has been extensively road-tested.  I wish to thank the good
people on the Video Girl Ai mailing list, who read the earlier draft of
this story and helped me correct a few errors here and there, especially
cultural.

*  I tried to keep the Japanese cultural references as accurate as possible
(Western-style toilet in the beginning notwithstanding--do people read
whilst squatting?), but, not living there, I've most likely buggered up a
time or two, especially with the grave visit.  If I did, E-mail me, tell me
about it and I'll correct them.

*  The Dragonball UFO Catcher doll:  I had to make a reference to Katsura
and Akira Toriyama's friendship and influence on each other's work
somewhere.  At least I didn't stick Batman in anywhere.

*  Guess who the Canadian busker in the park was.  It's my fic, and I'll
give myself a cameo if I want to.  BTW, I don't really know how to play
"Blurry Eyes," but I'd like to learn how, and I can't speak Japanese, but,
like any good subtitled anime fan, do know how to pronounce "arigato
gozaimasu."

*  The album title _Memory Wharf_ is a nod to Omoide Hatoba, a band led by
Boredoms guitarist Seiichi Yamamoto, whose sound I describe as a more
benign and coherent version of Boredoms.  Yeah, I'm a music reviewer.  How
did you guess?

*  I'm hoping to use "The Lessons of Friends" in a song myself somewhere.
If you want to use it yourself, get in touch with me and let's talk
contract.

*  For the two or three of who don't know, Megumi Hayashibara did Ai's
voice for the VGAi OVA series.  IMHO, it's the best work she's done as a
seiyuu.  The arcade scene is also an OVA reference, as is Ai's comment
about teaching Youta about how to take a woman where she wants and make it
look like a surprise.

*  The Man in the Coat:  In the translations, he's named Rolex (somebody
pointed out that technically it was Rorekku), but neither Ai nor Youta know
that, so...

*  To fans of Moemi and Nobuko who might be bugged by their notable absence
in this story:  Take the energy and keystrokes you'd spend rattling off a
flame to me and write your own fanfic with them in it instead.  I might do
it myself in the future if the muse leads me to, but don't wait for me.

Dave Watson
aj153@freenet.carleton.ca

-- 
Dave Watson, Severed Heads Liberation Front (Re-release the _Stretcher_ EP!)
Frezier Balzoff (Ottawa), Ontario, Canada  Email--aj153@Freenet.carleton.ca
           "A man is measured by the depth of his anger."--Eddie
ONTARIO--Where FASCIST PRAGMATISM and DEFICIT HYSTERIA pass for COMMON SENSE.